For all Caroline’s cautious confidence that they’d be able to ruffle Gavin Tanner’s feathers, it hadn’t worked. Even more disappointingly, their desperate search for evidence that might prove his guilt had been fruitless. In any case, they still had most of the day left before his twenty-four-hour custody clock ran out, and that was without seeking an extension.
Caroline’s minimum target at this point was to secure enough evidence — even if only circumstantial — to secure an extra few hours on the clock. That way, they’d maximise their chances of finally nailing him. If all else failed and they had to bail him, they at least had his interview under caution, which could be used at a later date once evidence came to light. Some cases were slow to charge at the best of times, but dealing with fifteen-year-old evidence made that task all the more arduous. Still, she’d remain hopeful and quietly confident that they were on the right track.
A little later that morning, Caroline went to the toilet, where she found Sara Henshaw leaning against the cold tiled wall.
‘Everything okay?’ she asked.
‘One of those days,’ Sara replied. ‘I just needed a few minutes. Hope that’s alright.’
‘Course. Are you okay? I don’t want to sound rude, but you look like shit.’ Sara had always been the calm, level-head of the team, a stable presence even when emotions ran high. To see her looking so brow-beaten was a shock to Caroline.
Sara smiled through one corner of her mouth. ‘Thanks. I think.’
‘Has something happened?’
Sara sighed. ‘Sort of. I mean, yes. But not something that should’ve affected me, really.’
‘Would it help to talk about it?’ Caroline asked, standing beside her and leaning back against the wall, mirroring her stance.
‘I dunno. Probably. But it’s not something I ever do talk about, really. I had a call first thing this morning to say my mum had died.’
‘Oh god, I’m so sorry.’
‘No, it’s okay. Not my real mum. I mean, yes, my real mum, but not my proper mum. I was adopted as a baby. My birth parents were drug addicts. Criminals. My birth dad died when I was a kid, but she hung on and caused as much havoc as she could for a few more years. Mum and Dad — the real ones, the ones who brought me up — called me this morning and told me she’d been found dead yesterday evening.’
‘Christ. I don’t know how you’d even go about processing something like that.’
Sara shrugged, her top rasping on the grouting of the tiled wall. ‘I dunno. I don’t even know how I feel, to be honest. There’s sadness, I guess. It’s always sad when a life ends like that, especially when it’s been wasted. But at the same time it’s the end of a chapter. I always knew who they were, but they never wanted to bother with me. They didn’t care. As far as they were concerned, I was an unfortunate accident. But there was always that worry, that fear she might want to get back in touch and that I’d have to get to know her. I already knew enough to know that wouldn’t be a good idea. But every time the phone rang, every time someone knocked on the door, there was always that fear at the back of my mind it might’ve been her. It’ll take some getting used to realising it won’t be.’
‘Is that a good thing, then?’ Caroline asked.
‘I guess it is. It’s sad I’ll never know her. But then I never did know her, did I? And I never really wanted to, after the things I’d been told. But I guess that question’ll never be answered now, will it?’
‘No, I suppose not.’
‘My parents were great. My real ones, I mean. Not my birth ones. They brought me up brilliantly, but it’s amazing the things that still linger. So much that happens in those first few weeks and months goes on to shape your life for years. Decades. It’s quite worrying, really.’
‘What sort of things?’ Caroline asked.
‘Oh, I dunno really,’ Sara replied, through a deep exhalation of breath. ‘I don’t do well at getting close to people, I guess. I don’t trust easily. Maybe there’s a fear of rejection in there somewhere.’
‘I tell you what,’ Caroline said, stepping away from the wall. ‘How about we pop out for some fresh air for half an hour. Grab a coffee.’
Sara thought for a moment, then looked at her. ‘I’d like that.’
A few minutes later, they were sitting in The Daily Grind, a short walk from the police station, towards the town centre. They’d found a quiet corner, and sat down with their drinks.
‘Sometimes a change of scenery can help refresh the mind,’ Caroline said. ‘I mean, anything’s better than staring at a toilet cubicle in the police bogs.’
‘Oh, there are definitely some places round here that aren’t,’ Sara replied, smiling.
‘How are your parents? I imagine it must be pretty weird for them hearing that news, not to mention having to pass it on to you.’
‘Yeah. They’re okay, I think. Like you say, weird situation. I got the sense they were relieved, in a way, but that their main concern was for me. It always has been.’
‘They sound like good people,’ Caroline said.
Sara smiled. ‘They are. I’ve been very lucky. Just got to take that next step now, I guess. Not easy in this line of work, but hey.’
‘You mean a partner?’
Sara nodded. ‘Yeah. I know they always say coppers’ relationships fall apart. The job owns you. Things like that. Sometimes I can see how true that is. But then again, other times I wonder how much the job has already taken over and stopped me from finding someone. It’s not like I get much spare time.’
‘I hope this isn’t you telling me you’re thinking of leaving.’
‘Oh no. No, don’t worry. Nothing like that. I just mean… Well, it’s what I’ve always done. It’s what I’ve always known. Seeking a sense of order and justice, maybe. Helping people and trying to give them the second chance I was given. I dunno. Between you and me, I’ve never really had a boyfriend. Not a proper one, anyway. Sometimes I look forward a few years and wonder how long I’ve got left before it’s too late.’
‘I dunno,’ Caroline replied. ‘I don’t think it’s ever too late.’
‘It is for some things.’
‘Kids?’
‘Well, yeah.’
Caroline tried to rein in her thoughts. Concentrating on her own stresses in that area wouldn’t help Sara in the slightest. Besides which, she already had two wonderful kids — the only two she’d ever wanted, she told herself. ‘I’m sure it won’t take you long to find someone. There are websites and apps and all sorts these days. You don’t need to spend half as long at work as you do, either. You put far more in than you need to. I mean, maybe wait until we’ve charged on Operation Cruickshank, though.’
Sara laughed. ‘Don’t worry. I won’t start knocking off early just yet.’
‘I wouldn’t blame you. You’ve earned it.’
‘Besides, I still wonder whether the best option might be right under my nose.’
‘Aidan?’
Sara nodded. ‘Yeah. The more I think about it, the more it makes sense.’
Caroline bit her lip and tried to find the right words. She couldn’t break the girl’s heart by telling her Aidan was gay. But, then again, wasn’t it worse to keep stringing her along with false hope? ‘I… I’m really not sure he’s interested in that way,’ she said, finally.
‘Oh. Oh. Okay. Has he said something to you?’
Caroline sighed. ‘Sort of. I brought the subject up with him. Maybe it’ll just take him time. I don’t know. But I don’t think it’ll happen. Sorry.’
Sara looked at her. ‘He’s gay, isn’t he?’
‘Why do you say that?’
‘I’ve had my suspicions for a while. A sixth sense, maybe. And I can see the way you’re floundering about now, trying not to tell me.’
‘Well, I…’
Caroline was saved by the ringing of her phone. She took it out of her pocket and looked at the screen. It was Dexter.
‘Dex. What’s up?’
‘Guv, we’ve had a breakthrough on the Russell Speakman thing. You were right. He didn’t fall down the stairs alone. We’ve just had a confession.’