Josie
He’d left. Again. That damn asshole just up and left without a fucking word. I was so angry that I was ready to beat the shit out of someone, and maybe a little hurt too. All right, a lot hurt. He’d seen our precious daughter and had just ridden off like it was no big deal. I should have expected it, which is why I’d never told him about Allegra. He’d made it clear he never wanted kids, and I hadn’t wanted to force a daughter on him. Now he knew she was here, though, that she existed, and he’d still left. I was glad that Allegra was too young to ask questions about the strange man who’d stopped by a few days ago.
Since another Devil had shown up at the gates, I was going to assume that Jackal wasn’t coming back. I wasn’t going to hide Allegra from his club, though. Now that Jackal knew, I could move about the compound like I normally would, even if his club was here. Every time a Devil had been on the premises, even Scratch coming to see his daughter, I’d stayed hidden, making sure no one saw Allegra. The Reapers had been sworn to secrecy. All that careful planning, and now Jackal knew anyway. It had to happen sooner or later, but I hadn’t been prepared for it. Hadn’t even known he would be here.
It was daytime, so there weren’t club sluts hanging around the clubhouse when I walked in with Allegra on my hip. She was nearly two and didn’t have as much energy as most kids her age, but she kept me busy. We’d been through a lot, from me nearly losing her before she’d even been born, then her showing up way too early, to another scare after she was here. She was small for her age and had been through hell, but we were hanging in there, and Tank and the Reapers had been wonderful through it all. Without my family, I didn’t think I’d have survived. I’d never thought about being a mom, but if Allegra hadn’t made it, they probably would have had to bury me next to her.
The Devils were sitting around a table near the bar and eyed me as I came through. Scratch didn’t seem all that surprised as he looked Allegra over, and I worried that Jackal had already told them all, and they would be pissed I’d kept her a secret. I didn’t know if it would cause problems between the clubs, that I’d kept Allegra from the Devils, and had asked the Reapers to help me. Technically, my daughter was a product of both clubs, and the Devils had every right to get to know her. I’d kept her from them, from her family, even if I’d thought I had a good reason.
One of the Devils was standing at the bar, a beer in his hand, and he eyed me up and down a moment before moving a little closer. He didn’t look all that old, but the closer he got, I realized he was probably around my brother’s age. Fine lines fanned out around eyes that had seen far too much. The man looked Allegra over before his gaze clashed with mine again.
“Is this why we never see you when we visit?” he asked, his voice thick with an accent. Russian maybe? He sounded like the Russian mobsters on the movies I sometimes watched.
“This is Allegra. My daughter,” I said.
“I’m Stripes,” he said, then grinned. “Like the big jungle cat, yes?”
I bit my lip. I could see him being a predatory kitty, with the way he moved and that sharp gaze. Ladies probably dropped their panties when he entered a room. If my poor stupid, battered heart wasn’t still mooning over Jackal, I likely would have joined their ranks. But the asshole who had given me Allegra had done a number on me. I hadn’t been interested in even eyeing a guy too closely since he’d left.
“And this little angel is not just yours, no? Perhaps she’s part Devil?” he asked.
I glanced at the table of Devils and slowly nodded as I faced Stripes again. “Yes. She’s Jackal’s daughter.”
He nodded. “This explains much.”
With a wink, he rejoined his brothers and some of the tension left me. Maybe they wouldn’t be angry that I’d kept Allegra a secret. I still didn’t know what to make of Jackal appearing after so long, then taking off again. He’d seemed almost happy to see me, a playful smile on his lips, until he’d found out about his daughter. Then he’d taken off like his tail was on fire.
The newly patched Savior, who I’d known as Gabe the last few years, came over with a sippy cup in his hand for Allegra, and a virgin daiquiri for me. Ever since I’d had her, I’d given up alcohol except for an occasional glass of wine when a day had been exceptionally difficult. Tank was letting me live with him and had insisted I stay home with Allegra instead of getting a job. It meant he had to cover all our expenses, which I hated, but I loved having this time with my daughter. Especially when she’d been in the hospital for weeks after her birth, then was sickly the first few months she was home. Even now, she got sick easier than most kids.
“Thanks, Gabe,” I said, giving him a smile.
His brow arched and my cheeks flushed. “Sorry. Savior.”
I patted his cut, touching the stitching of his road name. He’d earned it, giving his all to the Reapers any time they’d needed help. Although, I think it had more to do with the medals someone had found hidden in Gabe’s things. The man was a decorated war hero, several times over. He’d only been patched in for a few months, but he’d made the transition seamlessly, and hadn’t seemed to get a big head over it. That was saying something. From what I’d heard, Coyote, formerly known as Prospect Pete, had acted like a jackass the first few months after he’d been patched in.
The Reapers always had a handful of Prospects hanging around. Some stuck it out and some didn’t. Poor Johnny had been a Prospect for as long as I could remember, and he still hadn’t been patched in, but I had a feeling it had more to do with his age. I’d heard he’d been prospecting since he was seventeen, and even now, he was only in his early twenties.
Savior placed his hand over mine, and I heard several chair legs scrape across the floor, then I had a bunch of Devils at my back. The one who had called himself Stripes growled and leaned toward Savior.
“Um, what’s going on?” I asked, glancing at the Devil’s Boneyard members.
“You’re Jackal’s,” Stripes said. “This Reaper needs to keep his hands to himself.”
Now it was my turn to raise my eyebrows as I stared at them incredulously. “Wait. The Jackal who ran off when he found out he was a dad? The Jackal who knocked me up and rode out of here without ever looking back, or calling? That would be a no. A big fucking hell no. I don’t belong to him. We have a daughter together, but that’s it.”
The Devils didn’t look too pleased with my words, and Savior’s hand tightened on mine. I knew he wasn’t romantically interested in me, but I could tell by the look in his eyes that he wanted to fuck with them. His gaze met mine before he wrapped an arm around my waist and pulled me closer to his side, the three of us looking a little too much like a loving family. Ah, hell. He was going to start a fight and Tank was going to be pissed at me. Somehow, he’d lay the blame for it at my feet, even though the testosterone in here was so thick even my sharpest knife wouldn’t cut it.
“Josie and Allegra are Reapers’ property,” Savior said. “Unless your boy Jackal wants to man the fuck up and say otherwise. But since I don’t see him here… Oh, wait. That’s right. He left. Again.”
Stripes snarled at him and I bit my lip, hoping that if fists were going to fly, they’d let me and Allegra move out of the way first.
More booted steps came our way and I looked over Savior’s shoulder to see my brother, Torch, and Flicker heading our way. Torch didn’t look like he was going to put up with any shit today. I’d heard that since Isabella had come home and made him a daddy that he’d mellowed a little, but right now, he was every inch the Pres of the Reapers, and he looked a little pissed.
“What the fuck is this shit?” Torch asked. “You’re guests in my fucking house, and you’re going to bow up to a patched member?”
Stripes backed up a bit, but not much. “He said Josie and the little angel were Reapers’ property, but they’re Jackal’s woman and kid.”
Torch just stared until Stripes backed up a little farther. Then his gaze swung to Scratch, the VP of the other club. “Are we going to have a problem?”
“Don’t think so. But just so we’re clear, the little girl is both a Reaper and a Devil. Even if Jackal doesn’t claim Josie as his old lady, their daughter is a product of both clubs, and we’re laying claim to Allegra,” Scratch said. Then he grinned a little. “Think of it as joint custody until Jackal can pull his head out of his ass.”
Torch pushed his hands into his pockets. “I don’t see Jackal here. And even if he does show up, Josie doesn’t have to accept him if she doesn’t want to.”
Scratch nodded, and the Devils backed up and went back to their table. Torch patted Savior on the shoulder.
“I want you to keep an eye on Josie and Allegra while the Devils are here. Stripes doesn’t seem all that stable, and I don’t want anything bad to happen. When Tank isn’t home, I want you there, or take Josie where she needs to go. You can use one of the club trucks since I doubt you’re going to fit in her tiny as fuck car,” Torch said.
My eyes narrowed at the man who often treated me like a father would a rebellious daughter. “My car isn’t tiny. You’re just all freakishly huge.”
Torch winked at me. Tank kissed the top of my head as he passed by, and even Flicker squeezed my shoulder. They were all like brothers to me, even Savior. He tried to tug me toward the door, but I wasn’t budging. Not yet anyway.
“I want to enjoy my drink,” I said. “It’s not like we can see the doctor right this second anyway.”
He looked at me. Really looked at me. “What’s wrong? The shadows under your eyes are darker than usual.”
“Allegra had a rough night.”
“Which means you did too.”
I nodded.
Savior squeezed my waist, and we both sat down at the bar while I sipped on my frozen drink. A Prospect was standing between us and the Devils. Ivan. I’d always liked him, mostly because he was nice to me, and not in an I-want-in-your-pants kind of way. Savior signaled to him and got a bottle of water.
“Water?” I asked.
“If I’m going to drive you and princess around, then I don’t want to drink alcohol. Even if a cold beer does sound good,” he said, giving me a wink.
“Thanks, Gabe,” I said softly.
He grinned, letting me call him by his given name without a fight. I knew if a brother had done that, he’d have handed their ass to them, but I was like a little sister to all of them. He might have puffed up earlier and it made me think he preferred I call him by his road name, but I knew he hadn’t really minded. They were all big, rough, and tough to outsiders or other clubs… With me? They were like overgrown teddy bears. That’s the one thing I could say about every last Dixie Reaper. They didn’t take shit from anyone, but once they loved someone, they’d die for them. And they treated their old ladies and kids like they were precious gems.
Ryker and Laken strolled in, and I took that as my sign to leave. Not that there was anything wrong with them, but I sometimes felt like Ryker didn’t care for me too much. He’d never been overly rude, but when I’d found out I was pregnant and hadn’t told Jackal, Ryker had gotten this look in his eye like he’d disapproved. He wasn’t a Reaper, though, so I didn’t really give a shit what he thought. I just didn’t want to deal with the stress of having that disapproving stare cast my way.
“Can you come with me to take Allegra to the doctor?” I asked. “I called when they opened to see if they would take a look at her. She was fussier than usual last night, and I just want to make sure nothing is wrong.”
“Did you drive here?” he asked.
“Yeah. My car is out front.”
“Then let me grab the keys to one of the trucks and I’ll pull it around. We can move her seat over. Torch is right. There’s no fucking way I’m fitting in your damn car.”
I smiled. “I didn’t buy it with overgrown bikers in mind.”
“You should have. You know that tall, sexy, and tattooed is your type.” He winked, and I giggled. He wasn’t wrong. I’d had fun flirting with the Reapers before, knowing it would never go anywhere, but even when I’d gone out on dates, I’d always liked the bad boys.
And look where that had gotten me.
I went outside to get Allegra’s bag from my car and left the door open so Gabe could move her car seat over. Once Allegra was buckled, Gabe helped me up into the truck, then drove us to the doctor’s office. Because of her health issues, I’d stuck with the pediatrician who had taken care of her in the hospital. Dr. Aikens was amazing, and so nice.
Gabe carried Allegra for me so I could get my daughter signed in, and then we sat and waited. Allegra rested against Gabe, clutching his cut, and I wondered if she’d do the same if her daddy were to ever hold her. My heart hurt just thinking about Jackal not wanting us. Not wanting her. How was I supposed to tell her that her daddy didn’t want her? I knew one day she’d ask.
It took an hour, but we were finally called back. Gabe had offered to wait out front, but I worried I might need moral support. Every time I had to bring Allegra in, I was anxious that it would be bad news. After her rocky start in life, part of me was always waiting on the other shoe to drop, as the saying went. I was always concerned that she’d be taken from me far too soon, and I knew my heart would break and I’d never be the same if that ever happened.
“Good morning, Josie,” Dr. Aikens said as he came into the room. His ginger hair was bright under the florescent lighting, and his blue eyes twinkled. I’d never been rude enough to ask his age, but the rumor around town was that he was younger than my brother, single, and considered the most eligible bachelor in town.
“Allegra was fussy all night, and she seems more lethargic than usual,” I said, as Gabe eased my daughter onto the paper-covered table.
“Let’s take a look,” Dr. Aikens said.
He checked her ears, looked at her throat, listened to her heart, and went through the routine stuff he always checked out when Allegra came in. When he was finished, he folded his arms and studied me.
“She has an ear infection, and her throat looks irritated. Her temperature is a little elevated, but not high enough to worry. I’ll call in some antibiotics for her, and some eardrops that will help numb the pain a bit. She might run a bit of fever the rest of the night and possibly for a few days, so give her Tylenol as needed. And of course, if it goes too high, take her to the ER or call me. You have my cell number,” he said, and I noticed Gabe look at him sharply.
“She has your cell number?” Gabe asked.
Dr. Aikens nodded, looking amused. “Yes. I gave Josie my number after Allegra was born in case she ever needed me. Though she hasn’t used it often.”
Gabe looked my way and I knew he’d have questions for me later. It wasn’t that I had kept it a secret that Dr. Aikens had given me his personal number, but I’d known my brother wouldn’t like it, and it seemed the other Reapers didn’t either. I seriously doubted that the sexy doctor wanted anything to do with a single mom who looked like she’d been dragged backward through a cat door, and hadn’t slept decently in two years. The man was just being nice, and being a concerned doctor. Nothing more.
“Usual pharmacy?” Dr. Aikens asked.
“Yes, and thank you for seeing her on such short notice,” I said.
“Anytime, Josie. Call with any questions or concerns, otherwise, I’ll see you at her next routine visit.”
Gabe ushered me out of the room, Allegra back in his arms, but his shoulders were tense. When we got into the truck, he gave me a hard look.
“What the fuck, Josie? You know Tank would shit a brick if he knew Allegra’s doctor was flirting with you. He doesn’t fit in our world, and never will.”
I sighed. “Give it a rest, Gabe. He’s just being nice and is concerned about Allegra. Don’t read anything into it. The man has never been inappropriate, and I’m sure he treats all the parents the same way.”
He shook his head, and I had no doubt he’d pass it along to Tank that he thought Dr. Aikens was flirting with me. Like I needed them to protect me from a cultured, intelligent man who saved lives for a living. If they wanted to focus on keeping someone away from me, maybe they should concentrate their energy on asshole bikers. Like Jackal. Although, Jackal seemed to be pretty good at keeping himself away from me.
I actually couldn’t remember the last time a man had looked at me as if I were desirable. Jackal had been the last man to touch me intimately, to kiss me, and he’d been the only man who’d ever had sex with me. Now I was just a tired single mom who looked like she’d last slept a few years ago, which was about right. Once my all day long morning sickness had kicked in, I hadn’t gotten much sleep, and after Allegra arrived it had only become worse. I didn’t regret having her, loved her more than anything or anyone, but sometimes I was lonely.
Yes, I had my brother and the Reapers, and I had Allegra, but that wasn’t the same as being in a relationship with someone. I missed having a man’s arms around me, wanted someone to lie next to me at night. Was it asking too much that I wanted a man who would love me and would love my daughter?
Gabe glanced my way a few times. “Why do you look so sad?”
“Because no one wants me, Gabe. Jackal’s the only guy I’ve ever been with, and since he left the first time, no one else has looked at me that way. And if you, my brother, and the other Reapers have a say in it, no one ever will.”
I looked out the window and watched the scenery pass. Gabe sighed, but he didn’t comment. When we got back to the compound, he drove me straight to the house and helped me get Allegra inside and settled.
“I’m sending a Prospect for her prescriptions,” he said. “I’ll keep an eye on her for a little while. You should get some rest.”
I nodded and left Allegra in his capable hands. It wasn’t the first time he’d helped take care of her, and I doubted it would be the last. Each of the Reapers had doted on Allegra since she’d come home. Even though there were a half dozen or more kids running around the compound, she seemed to be everyone’s favorite.
In my bedroom, I changed into some comfortable pajamas, then crawled into bed. Gabe was right about me needing some sleep. I burrowed into my pillow, pulled the blankets up to my chin, then closed my eyes. I could hear the TV in the living room with Allegra’s favorite show playing, and I smiled softly as I slowly fell asleep.