Ruth wrapped her gray cloak around her as she sat between her mother and Naomi on the church bench. Men were lighting the fireplaces around the large sanctuary, eager to warm the chilly air. On the drive to New Garden Friends Meeting, white dew had layered the grass and bare tree branches lining the dirt road.
She loved attending New Garden every Sunday morning. It gave her a chance to see old school friends and distant family, and to worship in fellowship in the loving grace of God. This morning was the first time she’d ever felt apprehensive at the idea of attending meeting. Josiah would be here with his mother and brothers. Ruth thought highly of Pearl Wall and had looked forward to being her daughter-in-law. She prayed things wouldn’t be awkward between them.
“Thee has hardly spoken all morning. Is thee all right?” Her mother whispered in her ear, her warm breath carrying in the frigid air like white smoke.
Ruth nodded, rubbing her gloved hands together to heat her fingers. She longed to go over and stand by the fire. But she remained on the hard bench, seated with the women, divided by a partition from the men, who sat on the other side of the room.
Families continued to arrive in a steady flow, filling up the benches and greeting each other with nods and smiles. Most of the women were garbed in plain dresses of black, gray, brown, or dark blue. Their bonnets covered their heads and shielded their expressions in shadow. The men wore brown or black pants, white shirts, black jackets, and the familiar round-brimmed hats.
Someone touched Ruth’s shoulder. She turned. Pearl Wall smiled, her green eyes shining with warmth as she perched on the seat behind Ruth and swept a strand of silver hair beneath her white bonnet. No animosity or haughty judgment lingered in her demeanor.
“Good morning, Friend Ruth Payne. How has thee been lately? Josiah told me of the fall thee took. I worried about thee, but I knew thee would be in good hands with Dr. Edwards.”
“I’m much better. I had a slight concussion, but the swelling is gone. And thee?” Ruth forced her gaze to meet Pearl’s eyes, so she wouldn’t be tempted to look around the sanctuary for Josiah.
“Same as usual. Although I’m looking forward to purchasing a few of thy father’s pumpkins to bake some pies. It’s Josiah and Samuel’s favorite.”
“What’s my favorite?” Samuel paused in the aisle, his mischievous brown eyes full of youth and wit.
“Pumpkin pie,” Ruth answered, grateful he wasn’t Josiah.
“Not me, mine is cherry,” Andrew said, walking up behind Samuel.
Ruth stiffened. Where was Josiah? He couldn’t be far behind them. She allowed her gaze to drift to Andrew’s tall frame.
“Good morning, Ruth Payne.” Josiah walked up and stood beside Andrew. While they were of equal height, Josiah was thinner and his shoulders not quite as broad, since he spent more time in the store and Andrew worked hard at farming out in the fields. Had Josiah lost a bit of weight in the last few days? His eyes were bloodshot, and faint circles framed his dark brown eyes. She wished they were outside where the light was more telling.
“Good morning, Josiah.” She clenched her teeth to keep from blurting out questions of concern. Their gazes crossed. His eyes were searching and penetrating, aching and soaking up every minute detail about him.
“The pastor is going up front. We’d better get seated,” Andrew said, nodding toward the men’s side. He and Samuel walked away, while Josiah lingered and stepped closer.
“Thee looks beautiful, Ruth.” Josiah lowered his voice. Sadness lingered in his tone, piecing her heart like a doubleedged sword. Doubt cast a spell in her mind, weaving a web of confusion as he strode away.
Pastor Gray stood and, with his hands folded, waited until all conversation faded. “Let’s bow our heads to pray and let the Lord lead us.”
Throughout their fellowship meeting, Ruth struggled to concentrate on her relationship with God. Raw pain sank her spirit deeper into despair. The last thing she’d wanted to do was hurt Josiah. If he truly loved her, why did he have such a hard time marrying her? Josiah was a decisive man who never acted on impulse. He planned every action. He would have given careful consideration to his decision to postpone their wedding a second time. Knowing this made his paltry excuses harder to bear.
Soon the meeting ended, and all the Friends filed out of church. Ruth kept her head down, avoiding eye contact. She didn’t feel like engaging in pleasantries.
“Ruth Payne!” A man called her name, but she didn’t recognize his voice. She took a deep breath, forced a smile, and spun around. Surprise lifted her mood as she watched Solomon Mendenhall take long strides toward her. He’d been away at the University of Chapel Hill for two years.
“I thank thee for giving me a moment,” he said. He glanced at the members of her family who’d paused with her and nodded to each one in greeting. “A pleasure to see thee again, Matthew Payne, Elizabeth Payne, and Friends Naomi, Caleb, and Elijah.”
“Welcome home.” Ruth’s father extended his hand with a wide smile, and Solomon shook it. “Is thee home for good, or is this only a short visit?”
“I’m home for good this time. I plan to set up an attorney’s office in the new town of Greensborough.” His bright blue eyes drifted to Ruth. “In fact, I wanted to ask if I may stop by for a visit sometime.”
If Solomon had been looking at her mother and father when he asked the question, perhaps it wouldn’t have felt so personal. But since he continued to stare at her as if he wanted her permission, Ruth’s neck grew warm, and she felt her face flush.
“Thee is always welcome at the Payne home,” Mother’s voice said behind Ruth, rescuing her, and her mother laid gentle hands on her shoulders.
“We’re going home to a big Sunday meal. Why don’t thee invite thy family over? We’d enjoy thy company,” Father said.
“My parents and sister have already accepted an invitation to my uncle’s house. I would be the only one free to accept thy offer.”
“Then come on over. I’d like to hear the news from Chapel Hill. Elijah is intent on taking over the farm, but Caleb has a great interest in learning. I’d like to hear thy thoughts on the university there,” Father said.
“I’d be delighted to help in any way I can,” Solomon said. “I’ll walk with thee to the buggy then grab my horse. I rode to meeting on horseback this morn.”
“Thee brought thy stallion?” Ruth asked.
“Indeed. I thought he could use the exercise.” He walked beside Ruth as they followed her parents. “Would thee like to see him?”
“Perhaps when we return home.”
A motion caught her attention. She glanced to the right. Josiah paused before climbing aboard the buggy with his mother and brothers. He stared, his rigid back went slack, and he turned, but not before she witnessed the raw hurt in his dark brown eyes.
Guilt ripped through her. She knew he’d misinterpreted her walk with Solomon. She had no interest in anyone else, but would it do any good to try to convince him of it, now that their engagement was no more? Maybe it was better this way. She looked down at the grass and blinked back scorching tears.
Josiah’s gut clenched as Ruth walked by with Solomon Mendenhall, their arms a mere inch apart. When her gaze paused in Josiah’s direction, her lips fell into a frown, and a tiny dimple formed on her chin. She crossed her arms over her middle and rubbed them—a sign of discomfort.
His head swam in a jealous rage as anger ripped through his battling chest. Torn by the desire to march over and interrupt them and the fear of upsetting Ruth, Josiah held back. If he caused a scene, winning her forgiveness might take even longer.
He stepped forward but pivoted on his foot, turning around in a circle. What should he do? He couldn’t just stand by and watch Solomon take his place—especially now, when Ruth felt unloved.
At thirteen Solomon had started hanging around Ruth, teasing her, and walking her home from school. It was the first alarm Josiah had ever felt at the prospect of losing her to someone else. He’d always assumed they’d grow up and marry, until Solomon came along and shook up his confidence—then and now.
How could he have gotten so comfortable and sure of himself that he’d taken their relationship for granted? Wasn’t Solomon supposed to be at that fancy law school in Chapel Hill? Perhaps Josiah could wait it out until the fellow returned to school and was no longer a threat. He didn’t need a smooth- talking lady’s man flattering Ruth.
“Does thee plan to stand there and gawk after Ruth Payne long after she’s gone?” Samuel asked.
“I wonder when Solomon Mendenhall came back and how long he’ll be here.” Josiah rubbed his chin and shifted his weight from one foot to the other.
“Sarah Goodson was looking for thee after the meeting, but thee had already left the sanctuary.” Samuel winked, a teasing expression on his face as he raised an eyebrow.
Josiah sighed in frustration and turned to walk away. He didn’t need his brother’s taunts right now.
“I thought thee might like to know—” Samuel’s words chased him. “I heard Sarah telling Mother that Solomon is home for good. He graduated and plans to set up a law office in the new town of Greensborough.”
“Is thee sure?” Josiah paused in midstride and closed his eyes.
“Yes.” Samuel cleared his throat. “What will thee do?”
“I’m not sure.” Josiah shook his head, glad his hat sheltered his eyes. He blinked several times, willing the sting away as he turned to face his brother. “Right now I’m going for a walk. Tell Mother I’ll be home later.”
Josiah didn’t wait for a response. He set out with the cool breeze and kicked at the brown leaves tumbling onto his path. With no destination in mind, he let his feet carry him to the house he’d built for their marriage. He stood outside and surveyed the white two-story structure, a dream he’d envisioned for almost a year.
While everything on the outside looked finished, Josiah knew the rooms on the inside were bare and in need of furniture. He’d wanted everything to be perfect when he carried Ruth over the threshold. She’d worked so hard all her life. This was one gift he wanted to give her—without her having to work for it.
He slipped his hands inside his pockets and climbed the three steps to the wraparound front porch. He pulled out a key, inserted it into the lock, and turned the knob. The bolt slid and clicked into place.
The door opened on the newly oiled hinges without a sound. He stepped inside and sniffed the fresh scent of pinewood flooring. The empty foyer with the white-painted walls greeted him like a barren castle. His satisfaction of accomplishment vanished in the realization that it meant nothing without Ruth.
If she didn’t come back to her senses and renew their engagement, he couldn’t live here. The dream would be incomplete—a reflection of his failure—a constant reminder.
His booted heels clicking against the floor was the only sound as he strolled into the living room then the dining room. Perhaps if he filled this house with the furniture they’d talked about making, and brought her back to see their dream had become reality, she’d realize how much he loved her, and she’d understand.
Josiah shrugged out of his black jacket and laid it on a counter in the kitchen. He’d start on the dining room furniture today. If he worked out back in the shade, no one would see him laboring on the Sabbath.
Hadn’t the Lord used the analogy of going after a lost animal even on the Sabbath if it strayed? How could he do any less? His love had strayed under some misguided perception. All he needed to do was prove he still loved her and lure her back. What better way to do that than show an act of faith— provide a finished home, fully furnished, and ready for a new family—theirs?