1. Meredith and Judith’s relationship is as complex as it is heartbreaking. How would you describe their power dynamic and the way secrets play a role in how their relationship developed? What are your own experiences as a parent or the child of a parent who might not have always been forthcoming? Is it a parent’s job to shield their child from ugly truths, or is it their duty to be honest, even when the truth might be damaging?
2. Thalias are crucial within the world of They Drown Our Daughters. How does the author use them as a foreshadowing device? How might your reading experience change knowing what these flowers represent?
3. Many of the key scenes take place either in or within sight of the Cape Disappointment lighthouse. Why might the author have chosen a piece of architecture traditionally meant to represent light and safety to underscore dark and sometimes deadly scenes? What does that searching red light represent?
4. When her daughter is kidnapped, Meredith is keen to latch on to the idea of a curse, despite the fact that her mother’s belief in the curse was part of what soured their relationship. Why might she be so willing to believe in it now, at this critical juncture? What “truth” about her own ability as a mother is she trying to deny by embracing the idea of a curse?
5. Meredith struggles with the fear that, despite all her efforts, she isn’t a “good” mother. What might be feeding that fear?
6. Though Regina is revealed to be a villain, she is often portrayed as a victim. How might her victimhood have contributed to her becoming villainous? Does she believe herself to be a villain or victim? Why?
7. As a parent, Diana’s decision to pretend that the danger plaguing their family doesn’t exist appears to have disastrous consequences. Can it be argued that Diana was acting in the best interest of her children? Or were her intentions selfish?
8. When Meredith first returns to the cape, she compares the French words for sea (la mer) and mother (la mère), noting how close they are to being the same. How might the setting for the novel be representative of motherhood? How might it be a parallel of Meredith and Judith’s fraught relationship?
9. As a child, Judith had an incredibly vivid imagination. How was that used to build her character? How does she use stories to cope with upheaval and uncertainty?
10. Judith tries to both bargain with and fight back against Marina, leading to a couple of tragic deaths. Was Judith responsible for those deaths? Why did Marina drown her uncle and friend?
11. Meredith, Judith, and Alice all use the pink shell to communicate with Marina’s ghost. Is there any significance to when the shell presents itself to each character? How might you compare their experiences?
12. The legend of the mermaid was once the backbone of Cape Disappointment. How might Marina’s presence in the water have inadvertently inspired the legend? What similarities are there between her spirit and a siren?
13. How does this book compare to other novels you’ve read that are set near the ocean? What similarities can you think of? What differences?
14. How does the book’s title work in relation to its contents? What assumptions did you draw about the curse based on the title? Do Meredith’s or Judith’s assumptions about the curse mirror or oppose your own?
15. Is there any significance to Alice allowing the lighthouse to fall into complete disrepair? What are the possible implications of your interpretation of the ending?
16. What book or movie or story has scared you the most? How do the frightening aspects of this novel compare?