Chapter 12
Zoe’s hands fidgeted. She stared at her keyboard, with only a few words left to post her discussion for the week for class. The keys tapped underneath her fingers. She clicked the post button. Done.
Alex. All she saw was him. Were they still on the road? Was he nervous about the band’s performance? Zoe shut her laptop, stood to her feet, and paced the floor of her apartment. She breathed. He wouldn’t call.
She stared at her cell on the coffee table. Her gut twisted. She unbuttoned the top button of her emerald green shirt. Thank goodness she had the night off. No one else needed to see her this way. Her emotions wrapped in a man.
Zoe plopped on her couch. She noticed the look in his eyes this morning. His steady eye contact. His bright eyes. His tone soft when he spoke to her. Zoe folded her arms. Was it only for her?
Her phone rattled on her coffee table, making her shriek. Alex’s name showed on screen. He kept his word. Was that a sign?
“Not too late is it?” he asked.
Zoe played with the loose curls that had escaped from her messy bun. “No. I just finished an assignment. How did the show go?”
He chuckled, and she could picture his smile. “It went great. We blew it out of the water!”
Zoe giggled. Then she heard the faint sound of an engine. “You’re back on the road already?”
“That’s how it works. We have another gig tomorrow night.”
“I can’t imagine. Is it wearing on you yet?”
“We haven’t been touring that long. Maybe in a few years once we got a few awards under our belt.”
“Did you always want to be a drummer?” she asked, reclining on her gray sofa. She adjusted some of the decorative pillows against her back. Why was it easy to talk to him?
“Not always.” He cleared his throat. “Can I be honest?”
“Sure.”
“I wasn’t popular in school. I was the...”
“Nerd? Geek?”
He laughed. “I think people would call that offensive today, but yes. I took advanced placement classes, mostly.”
“Smart guy,” she said. Was she grinning? Zoe shook it off. “When did the drums come along?”
“I’ve been playing since I was three or four but I didn’t take it seriously until middle school. I tried out for the school band, and things skyrocketed from there. Next thing I know, Tommy’s introducing me to your brother.”
Zoe swallowed. Was Jackson in earshot of Alex? Did he know he was talking to her? She ignored her quivering insides. She could make her own decisions. She focused on their conversation. “And playing the drums changed how people saw you.”
“Especially the ladies. I went from geek to bad boy overnight. I’ll admit. I liked the attention.”
“Has much changed since then?” Why did she ask that? It didn’t. Alex was only talking to her because she was the one who had his attention. As soon as something better came along, he would leave. Zoe ran a hand down her face. “Sorry, I shouldn’t have asked.”
“I know my past isn’t perfect, Zoe.” Alex sighed. “I don’t know what you think of me, but I want you to know that I...”
“You what?” She sat up on the sofa.
“I meant what I said at Lisa’s place. I want to get to know you. Date you. You’re what I want.”
“For now?”
“Zoe, don’t assume the worst. I know nowadays most men string women along with no destination in sight. I’ve been that guy, but that was until... you. I think you’re amazing.”
She fell silent. He sounded sincere. He couldn’t have been lying.
“Zoe?”
Her heart rate quickened. Dr. Burns’ words flooded her mind. Should she give Alex a chance? “I’m not what you think I am.”
“What?” he sounded confused.
“I moved to Bridge Point, Alex, to start fresh. I was... reckless at one time in my life. I made some terrible choices. Between Jackson and my parents, I don’t think they trust me. I don’t blame them.” She heard a rustling noise. “Alex?”
“I’m here. Just sitting up on this couch. Go on.”
She blew out her cheeks. “I dated this one guy in college. We were wrong for each other, but I didn’t think that then. I was in love and refused to listen to my parents. We went partying one night and had too much to drink. I ended up driving us back to campus, but... we got into a wreck. I had a few scratches, but he was... paralyzed from the waist down.”
“Wow,” Alex said, as if her story took him by surprise.
“I’ve blamed myself ever since. He hated me for it.” Her voice broke, and she wiped a tear from her face. “I don’t want...”
“You think we’ll be a mistake?” he asked.
Her words must have crushed him. “Please try to understand, Alex.”
“I do,” he said. He was quiet for a moment. “I guess I thought the same thing.”
Her eyebrows shot up. She sniffled. “You did?”
“My Mom leaving damaged me, Zoe.” He paused but continued. “It broke my Dad. I haven’t seen her since, but between that and my high school girlfriend leaving me for someone else, I kept my relationships... shallow.” A mirthless laugh escaped his lips. “I’ve never told anyone that. It’s been a while since I... talked to a woman like this.”
She gave a slight smile. “Why are you telling me?”
“I think deep down, I know it’ll be different with you. Thank you for sharing with me.”
Zoe pressed a palm to her cheek. “You’re welcome. Thank you for telling me.” She swallowed. “Alex?”
“Yeah?”
“If we do this, can we keep it between us for now?”
“I’m not lying to your brother, Zoe,” he said.
“I don’t want you to, but I need to be the one to tell him. Please?”
“Is that what you want?” he asked.
“Yes.”
“Okay. I won’t say a word, but if anyone asks, I’m not lying, Zoe. I won’t lie about how I feel about you.”
“I won’t either.”
“Won’t what?”
“You’re going to make me say it?” she asked, a grin taking over her face.
“I think it’s fair since we both poured our hearts out.”
She rubbed at her shoulder. “I like you, Alex.”
“I like you too, Zoe.”
***
Fans screamed and yelled at Alex’s drum solo. They debuted their latest song, “Now that You’re Here.” The crowd sung along as Bailey waved her hands in the air, standing in front of the mic stand. They sang at the top of their lungs.
An expanded feeling in his chest took over once the music kicked back in with Jackson’s keyboard and Tommy’s guitar. Alex gave everything he had in tonight’s performance. He hit the last beat, and the cheers only amplified.
He grabbed a towel and wiped his face. Grabbing a bottle of water, he gulped the liquid. He descended the stage as Bailey and Jackson said their last goodbye. Alex returned to his dressing room backstage.
He looked in the mirror. His shirt soaked with sweat, so he grabbed another from his duffel bag. He had a few minutes, so he called Zoe.
“How was the show?” she asked.
His heart perked up. “Amazing. How are you?” He sat on the couch.
“I’m okay. Celine’s asleep.”
“Tell me your favorite food,” he said.
She giggled. “What?”
“What’s your favorite food?”
“Italian food. Why?”
“That’s where we’re going when I get back.”
“You’re asking me out officially?” she asked.
He wouldn’t let her get away. “Zoe Mills, will you go out with me? Only me.” Alex couldn’t believe his own ears.
“Only if you mean it,” she said.
He meant it alright. “I do, and you’ll know how much.”
“You don’t have to prove anything to me, Alex.”
“I know, but I don’t want you questioning either. I’m not seeing anyone else but you, Zoe.” Did she detect the seriousness in his tone?
“I believe you.”
“Good.” A knock sounded at his door. “Give me one second.”
“Okay,” Zoe said.
Alex opened his dressing room door, only to be met by Tabitha. His eyes bulged and his breath caught in his throat. Tabitha’s form fitting plum dress hugged every curve of her hour glass body. She pulled her black hair to drape over her shoulder and her brown skin was flawless. The woman was stunning, but Alex didn’t invite her inside.
“You looked surprised to see me,” she said.
“I am.” He swallowed. “You shouldn’t be here.”
“I thought we could talk. Besides, you did say I was always welcome at your shows.” She reached for him, but Alex pulled away. “Is that how it is now?”
“Tabitha, I already told you. I said that when we were dating. Things are different now. I think you need to leave.” He didn’t want to hurt her, but he’d rather talk to Zoe.
“You met someone else, haven’t you?” she asked.
“I need to change. The band’s meeting up with the press.”
Tabitha nodded. “Right.” She ran a hand down her neck. “I shouldn’t have come.” Her eyes narrowed at him. “You’re exactly who I thought you were.” She stormed down the hall and Alex closed the door after her. He looked at his phone. Zoe had hung up.
His body temperature rose. Why didn’t he mute his phone? He called her back, but she didn’t answer. She had to have heard Tabitha. This was bad. He called again. Nothing. Maybe she needed a minute or perhaps he assumed the worst.
What if the call dropped? Maybe she stepped away and heard nothing. Alex groaned. She heard. He could explain if she gave him the chance. He called a third time. Voicemail.
“Zoe, call me back. It’s not what you’re thinking.” His palms sweated. “Let me explain, okay? I’m not playing you and I’m not lying. I meant what I said. Call me back, please.” He hung up. His chest tightened. Another knock came at his door. If Tabitha came back, he would call security. Instead, it was Tommy.
“You ready?” he asked. Tommy eyeballed him. “You haven’t changed yet?”
“I’ll be out soon. I had to make a phone call.” He wouldn’t tell Tommy how his personal life had crumbled in less than ten minutes. No, it didn’t. Alex would fix it. “I’ll be out in a few.”
“Alright, man.” Tommy walked down the hallway and Alex closed the door. He hurried for the shower. As soon as they finished their interview and got back on the bus, he would call Zoe again. He only hoped she would pick up.
***
Zoe snapped more photos with her camera in the park. Taking a break from her studies had been the best idea, plus she got some incredible shots with the sun rays as they peaked through the clouds. The lunch hour proved to be one of the best times, so she headed to the park after lunch at Pam’s Diner.
She didn’t return Alex’s calls. Zoe needed to think. Who was that woman in the background? She figured there would be groupies, but he knew her name. Was she an ex? She sounded quite seductive, and Zoe hung up without listening to the rest of the conversation.
A part of her berated herself for not listening in further, but she couldn’t stand hearing the woman’s voice. She panicked. What did Alex do? She wouldn’t know.
Zoe’s phone buzzed in her purse. Taking it out, she spotted her friend’s name. Why did she think it was Alex again?
“How’s it going?”
“Great. Taking a break from studying and getting a few pictures. How are you?”
“Well...”
Zoe sat on a nearby bench.
“Xavier and I are done.”
Zoe’s body jerked. That was a surprise. “I thought you liked him?”
“I do.” Roslyn’s voice softened. “I did, but he doesn’t want a long-term relationship. What’s the point of me wasting my time to see if a man’s going to figure out how he feels about me? I may be blocking my husband.”
Zoe crossed her legs as she sat. “I get it, and I don’t blame you. I’m glad you love yourself enough to walk away.”
“I deserve better than that. Anyway, how are things with you? How’s drummer boy?”
Zoe laughed. “What?”
“That’s what he does, right? How is he?”
Zoe sighed. “I think he’s playing me. He called the other night, but I heard another woman’s voice.”
“No he didn’t!”
Zoe sighed. Her mind told her to leave him alone. A man like him probably had a list of women. Zoe didn’t want to be another on his checklist. Yet, her heart wanted him to be sincere. She tugged at her earring, thinking about their last conversation.
“Zoe?” Roslyn said. “Are you there? What did he do?”
Zoe’s lips parted. What did he do? She thought hard. Had he been honest? She thought so. Did he call when he said he would? Yes. Did he pressure her into a date? He was persistent, but he didn’t make her uncomfortable. She’d seen his softer side, especially when he was with baby Celine.
Alex took care of Lisa, supporting her after her divorce. Not perfect, but who wanted perfection. Her past wasn’t squeaky clean, and he had been understanding when she shared her story. Zoe rubbed her head. What did Alex do again?
“Nothing,” Zoe said.
“What do you mean nothing?” her friend asked.
“I mean... I might have assumed the worst.” She groaned. Zoe had to stop second guessing herself.
“Why’s that?”
“He has a reputation for being a...”
“Bad boy? Player?”
“Exactly. I don’t want to make a stupid decision. I don’t want to get hurt when I could have avoided it.”
Roslyn sighed. “I get it, Z. This love thing is a gamble, but do you want to know how I knew with Xavier?”
“How?” Zoe had been in a toxic relationship before and didn’t want to repeat her mistakes. She couldn’t disappoint her parents, Jackson, or herself.
“He never told me how he felt. Three months of dating and he never told me his intentions. So, I decided for him.”
Zoe mulled over her friend’s words. Confusion. She knew that all too well with guys. They would keep her in limbo, never expressing themselves. Alex wasn’t like that. He’d been vulnerable with her. He shared about his childhood and his mother abandoning him and his father. Alex had been clear with how he felt about her. He wanted her.
“Thinking over there?” her friend asked.
“Yes, a lot,” Zoe said.
“And? What’s the verdict?”
“I think I need to apologize.”
“Don’t beat yourself, Z. Even if Alex is a player, a man will change for the woman he wants.”
Zoe smiled. “How do you know all this?”
“My older brother. I’m so glad he talked to me growing up.”
Zoe thought of her brother, Jackson. He’d been the same along with her dad, giving her advice with men. Neither one of them would approve of her choice now. Her choice? She wanted Alex. How would her family take the news? Zoe blinked. She wouldn’t worry about it now. She had to fix things with Alex first.