And Now a Word from Our Sponsor: Aryan Grace
(See full-size advertisement at SecretsOfTheWeird.com)
Shunning the sun to maintain your sweet vanilla complexion? Unsure about the murky ancestry that may have crept into your racial make-up? Want to show the world white is always right?
Bathe in Aryan Grace®
Are all the other girls in your town obsessed with forcing their bodies to be bronze and impure? This revolutionary product also operates as a self-Anti-Tanner. Our special, state-of-the-art ingredients will ensure you never need to be concerned about being mistaken for anything but pure again!
Choose from Schutzstaffel Stawberry, Grand Dragon Fruit and Iron Eagle Musk for men.
Don't forget our other popular products. Life's a real gas with Auschwitz antiperspirant! Freshen your underams with our special clear gel that will never mar the purity of your skin. You'll never feel like a half-breed again!
Call 555-1488 within the next ten minutes and receive two bottles for the price of one, plus we'll throw in a free sample of our new line or ethnic cleansing scrubs: White Powder!
Aryan Grace: The body wash of the indiscriminate Nazi.