Micah shielded Tessa’s body from the crush of well-dressed couples filing out of the Metropolitan Opera House. He hadn’t known what to expect yet had thoroughly enjoyed the spectacular production of Mozart’s Magic Flute.
It was his first time inside the magnificent building with five great arched windows offering views of the opulent foyer and two murals by Marc Chagall. Tessa revealed that the exquisite starburst crystal chandeliers were raised to the ceiling just before each performance.
She also told him that one of her clients, a patron of the arts who sat on the board of the Met and several museums, held seasons tickets to the Metropolitan Opera and the American Ballet Theater and each year she mailed her two tickets as a Christmas gift. Once she revealed this Micah wondered who Tessa had taken the year before.
Tessa tugged at Micah’s arm. “Look, it’s snowing.” Softly falling snow was accumulating on the sidewalks. It was New York City’s first snowfall of the winter.
He smiled at her animated expression. When they’d dressed for the evening’s affair he hadn’t thought Tessa could improve on perfection, yet she had. He’d thought she was stunning the night of the National Latino Officers Association dinner-dance, but tonight she was the epitome of elegant sophistication. She’d chosen to wear a black wool gabardine suit with a pencil skirt and a peplum jacket, sheer black stockings and matching silk-covered pumps. On her ears a pair of diamond studs, and a delicate white strand necklace sprinkled with diamond spacers graced her slender neck.
It had taken all of his willpower not to remove her fur-lined silk three-quarter coat, then strip her naked and make love to her until he passed out or his heart stopped beating—whichever came first. But he’d known Tessa was looking forward to attending the opera, so he’d quickly dispelled his erotic thoughts.
“Do you feel like walking to Rockefeller Center to see the tree?” Tessa asked as snowflakes settled on her curly hairdo.
Micah lifted his eyebrows. “You want to walk in the snow?”
She smiled, bringing his gaze to linger on her mouth. “Yes.”
“Aren’t you afraid of ruining your shoes?”
She shook her head. It wasn’t often that she got into Manhattan to see the tree in person. “No. Now, if you’re afraid of a little snow, then we can—”
“Hello, Tessa. I’m a skier,” Micah said, interrupting her.
“Then let’s go, Micah. I’ll treat you to a latte if you get too chilled,” she teased.
Tucking her gloved hand into the bend of his elbow, Micah escorted Tessa down Columbus Avenue. They’d come into Manhattan several hours before the start of the performance to share dinner at Les Célébrités, a luxurious dining room off the lobby of the Essex House Hotel. When Tessa had invited him to accompany her to the Lincoln Center he’d wanted to make the night special and take her out to eat. When he’d called the restaurant he was told they were booked solid. Not one to accept a first refusal, he left his name and a call-back number, adding that he was a Kings County assistant district attorney. Three hours later he got a call with the news that they were able to seat him and a guest at one of their much-sought-after fourteen tables. He’d grown up watching his parents navigate and circumvent near-impossible situations by surreptitiously dropping names and titles, and usually with remarkable results.
“Do you bowl?” Micah asked Tessa after they’d walked several blocks.
“I haven’t bowled in a while. Why?”
“Some guys from the four-four are forming a bowling league after the new year. They’ll meet on Wednesday nights in the Bronx. I’d like you to partner up with me.”
“Will I be the only female?”
He chuckled softly. “No, Tessa. There will be female officers. Speaking of women, why don’t you invite your sister and her husband to join us? We could use another couple.”
“Simone and Tony are not a couple. They were divorced several years ago.”
“But, didn’t you introduce him as your brother-in-law?”
She inclined her head. “I did because I didn’t want to embarrass my sister by referring to him as her ex.”
“They looked rather friendly toward each other.”
“They have their ups and downs.” Tessa wanted to tell Micah that Simone had more bad times than good with Tony but decided Simone’s personal business was just that—personal.
“Invite her anyway. There’ll always be someone to pair her up with.”
She gave Micah a sidelong glance. “Are you matchmaking, Micah?”
“Oh, hell, no,” he countered quickly. “I tried that once and the result was I lost two friends.”
“I can’t promise anything, but I’ll call Simone to see whether she’d like to join us.”
The snow was falling harder the closer they came to Rockefeller Center. Surprisingly the streets were crowded with native New Yorkers and out-of-town tourists. No one seemed to mind the frozen precipitation as they stared up at the towering, gaily decorated Norway spruce.
Retracing their steps, they stopped at the garage to pick up Micah’s car. The city had become a winter wonderland with the falling snow and the holiday lights shining from the many apartment windows as they headed in a westerly direction toward Brooklyn. Donnie Hathaway singing Ray Charles’s classic “A Song for You” came through the speakers of the BMW Roadster.
She met Micah’s amused gaze when he stopped for a light. A dreamily sensuous light passed between them moments before he shifted into gear and sped off again. He reached for her hand the next time he stopped, placed it over the gearshift, holding it in place as he shifted gears. He still held her hand when he maneuvered into the twenty-four-hour garage where she kept her sport utility vehicle.
Three-quarters of an hour later Tessa carried the steaming mugs of chocolate topped off with a frothy cream into the bedroom, smiling at Micah as he took the mugs from her. Droplets of water from his recent shower clung to his coarse, closely cropped hair.
They got into bed, pulled up the quilts and sipped hot chocolate as the snow continued to fall, blanketing Brooklyn and most of the tristate area. The day that had begun with them wrapped in a passionate embrace ended with them talking about everything but themselves.
* * *
Early December found Tessa beset with a number of corporate holiday parties that made her reconsider an initiative she’d proposed to her sister and her cousin earlier in the year: she needed an assistant to set up appointments and follow up with orders from vendors. She made a notation in her planner to contact her alma mater to advertise for a part-time fashion student.
The first two weeks in the month she was in Manhattan three out of five nights at hotels or upscale restaurants, conferring with head chefs and banquet managers. As with her wedding business, coordinating private parties all came from referrals.
The doctor had cleared Micah to return to work, and he’d revealed that his first day back at his office he was greeted with a pair of boxing gloves while the theme song from Rocky blasted from a boom box. He took the gloves home and hung them on the handlebars of his bike suspended on the wall rack.
Tessa exchanged telephone calls with him every night; she’d outlined to him the details of her hectic monthly schedule, and although she wanted to see Micah, she knew it would prove disruptive to her busy schedule. Whenever she was with Micah or shared her body with him he took precedence, not Signature Bridals. But it was Signature Event Planners and Signature Bridals that she’d worked long hours to grow, and it was her dedication and work ethic that gave her the resources to live a very comfortable lifestyle.
Two weeks before her wedding Bridget and Melissa Knight, her maid of honor, came for their final fittings. As instructed, both brought their shoes, accessories and lingerie.
Removing a pin from the cushion strapped to her left wrist, Tessa adjusted the bodice to Melissa’s gown. “I’m going to insert a binder to minimize your breasts.” Melissa reminded her of a porcelain doll with her milky-white skin. She was petite with a full bosom, raven-black short hair and large brilliant eyes that changed color from blue to violet depending upon her mood. “You don’t want to show too much flesh to the religious officiates. I’d planned a wedding where the bride’s gown was cut so low that the rabbi was definitely shocked and embarrassed by the wanton show of flesh.”
A becoming blush found its way up Melissa’s chest to her hairline. “I’ve always had to wear separates because of my chest.”
Tessa met her gaze in the full-length mirror. “That’s not a problem with this dress because it was designed to fit your body’s proportions.” The black satin strapless ball gown had the same trapunto-stitched crisscross belt as Bridget’s; it emphasized Melissa’s slender waist without the cascading train. She’d excluded the train because it would’ve overwhelmed the bridesmaid’s diminutive height.
After Tessa made the final adjustments she told Bridget and Melissa the dresses would be delivered to Franklin Lakes within the week by special messenger. They gave her a perplexed look until she explained that she was willing to pay the extra cost to have a bonded courier deliver the garments.
She spent the remainder of the evening making alterations, praying neither Bridget nor Melissa would gain or lose any appreciable weight over the next two weeks.
Tessa’s eyes were tired and burning slightly when she finally crawled into bed. She shut off her phone’s ringer. She didn’t want to talk to Micah because hearing his voice before going to sleep elicited erotic dreams that made her ache for him like an addictive drug. Closing her eyes, she exhaled. Within minutes she’d fallen asleep.
* * *
Tessa had just finished going over the checklist for the Sanborn-Cohen wedding when the sound of the doorbell chimed throughout the house. She glanced at the small monitor perched on a side table in her office. The security company had installed a hidden camera over the doorway so everyone coming to or leaving Signature Bridals was filmed.
The corners of her mouth inched up in a beguiling smile as she went to answer the door. The scent of pine wafted in the air from the large wreath attached to the solid oak door. Christmas was two days away, and lights, wreaths and menorahs hung from doors of the brown-stones lining both sides of the street.
“Hello, stranger,” she crooned when he stared down at her as if she were truly a stranger. He was causally dressed in a black pullover sweater and jeans, a sheepskin jacket and leather slip-ons.
Micah drew in a breath, holding it, then exhaled. It’d been a month, four long, lonely weeks since he’d seen Tessa, and seeing her under the glow of the lanterns on either side of the door made him weak in the knees. She appeared thinner, almost fragile. Her eyes looked haunted as though she hadn’t had enough sleep. There was no doubt she was working too hard. When he’d asked to see her she’d said her schedule was so full that she barely had time to sleep. It was only when he told her that he wanted to give her his Christmas gift that she’d relented.
“Merry Christmas, Tessa.” He handed her a small shopping bag containing a gaily wrapped box.
Tessa peered into the bag. “Thank you. Please come in.”
He lifted his expressive eyebrows. “Are you sure you want me to come in?”
“Of course I am. I want to give you your gift.”
Micah didn’t move. “You didn’t have to get me anything.”
“I could say the same thing for you,” Tessa countered. “Come in, Micah. You’re letting out the heat.”
Grasping his hand, Tessa led him into her parlor. Wrapped gifts with matching tags covered the length of a mahogany credenza. Picking up a box covered with black-and-silver paper, she handed it to Micah.
“Merry Christmas, Micah.”
He angled his head. “Should I open it now or wait for Christmas?”
“Read the tag.”
“‘Do not open until Christmas.’”
“Does that answer your question?”
Micah stared at Tessa staring up at him. “Yes, it does.”
There was an uncomfortable silence until she asked, “Would you like something to eat or drink?”
The muscles in Micah’s face relaxed. How could Tessa not know that he could go without food or water for extended periods of time but not her? “No, thank you. But I would like something from you.”
Her expression mirrored confusion. “What?”
He took a step, bringing them within inches. “I’d like to kiss you.”
Her sexy mouth opened, closed, then opened again. “If you hadn’t asked me, then I would’ve asked you the same thing.”
Reaching for Tessa, Micah cradled her to his chest. “What happened to us?”
“What do you mean?”
“You were right when you called me a stranger. There was a time when we wouldn’t go more than a week without seeing each other.”
Tessa buried her face between his neck and shoulder. “I’ve been busy.”
“We’re both busy with our lives and our careers. But that’s no excuse for not finding time—quality time to see each other. Isn’t that what friends do?”
Easing back, she tried seeing what was going on behind Micah’s intense dark eyes. “We’re not friends, Micah.”
He blinked once. “If we’re not friends, then what are we?”
“We’re lovers. We sleep together. We don’t have sex, we make love.”
Micah’s eyebrow nearly met in a frown. “What are you trying to say, Tessa? I’ll acknowledge that you’re busy, but is there another reason why you don’t want to see me or answer your phone at night?”
She knew it was time she stopped lying to herself and to the man with whom she’d fallen in love. Straightening her shoulders, Tessa took a deep breath. “I don’t answer my phone at night because I can’t to talk to you.”
“Why?
“I can’t because I have a hard time falling asleep.”
“What do I have to do with you falling asleep?”
“I have dreams—erotic dreams.”
His frown deepened. “And you think I don’t, Tessa?” The tendons in his neck bulged. “Since I began sleeping with you I go to bed with a hard-on and wake up with one. I’m forty-one years old, Tessa, not an adolescent boy. I should be able to control my sexual urges, but I can’t. All that says is that we’re both horny. You’re going to have to come up with another reason—one that makes sense to me.”
“I…I love you.” There. She’d said it. She’d finally told him what lay in her heart. A bright smile softened her eyes and mouth. “I love you, Micah Sanborn.” His expression changed to one of shock. “I know I’m not sticking to our original agreement but—”
“No, Tessa,” he gasped. Micah felt as if someone had driven a stake through his heart. “Please don’t love me.”
“Don’t tell me what I should feel.”
He shook his head. “I’m not—I can’t tell you what you should feel. But it’s not going to work.”
The seconds ticked off as they regarded each other. Tessa’s eyes narrowed. “Do you think I’m going to ask you for a commitment? Do you actually believe I’d ask you for more than we have now?”
She hesitated, swallowing the screams of frustration welling up at the back of her throat as realization dawned. Micah thought she wanted a happily ever after with him. Yes, she loved him. Yes, she thought about when she would marry—but he hadn’t figured into the equation. What they shared was too new, too fragile to ask for more.
“I’m not asking you to fall in love with me, Micah,” she continued, this time her tone softer, more conciliatory. “You wanted to know and I told you. Perhaps it was a mistake for us to sleep with each other. Perhaps we should’ve stuck to friendship without the fringe benefits.”
Micah closed his eyes for several seconds. Tessa didn’t understand. She couldn’t understand how much she’d frightened him when she told him that she loved him.
“I don’t regret sleeping with you.”
“Nor I you,” Tessa countered. “In fact…” She swallowed the words poised on the tip of her tongue. “I made a mistake, Micah. I never should’ve gotten involved with you.”
“How can you say that, Tessa?”
“I just did. Now will you please leave?”
Micah managed to conceal the dread he hadn’t felt since he’d sat in the hospital’s clinic waiting for his mother’s return. He’d loved his mother unconditionally, and it’d taken four weeks away from Tessa for him to realize he loved her—unconditionally.
He admired her spunkiness, candor and beauty, respected the drive it took for her to own and operate her own business single-handedly and loved the unbridled passion she willingly offered him.
Her eyes filled with the shimmer of unshed tears, tears he knew he’d put there. “I’ll call you.”
The words washed over Tessa like a cold wave. “Please don’t. Let’s make a clean break while we still can be civil to each other.”
The soft chiming of a clock on the fireplace mantel signaled the half hour. It was six-thirty, the same time as when he’d first walked into Signature Bridals and the same time he’d leave Tessa Whitfield and Signature Bridals for the last time.
Turning on his heels, he walked out, leaving Tessa staring at his broad-shouldered back. She hadn’t realized her legs were shaking until her knees buckled. She managed to make her way to a club chair and sit down, willing the tears blurring her vision not to fall.
Tessa stared at the wood on the grate in the cold fireplace, replaying all that she’d shared with Micah. A wry smile twisted her mouth. She had established the rules and she had broken her own rule. There was no way she would blame Micah. The blame was hers to shoulder—alone.