AFTER NYA GAVE her statement to the constable who attended to take the report, she went back to work, leaving Theo to finish up. Once the constable departed, Theo checked on Hope, making sure she was still sleeping, then walked over to look out of his office window.
The view out over the small side garden of Carey House and down to the harbour beyond was one of his favourites and he found himself appreciating it even more than usual.
After talking with Nya, he felt a little lighter, a bit better about life.
He’d been avoiding her since the end of his marriage, and he wondered why.
He should have known she wouldn’t blame him, or treat him any differently, and he now admitted how he’d allowed his guilt and doubts about himself to cloud his decisions.
It was a relief to suddenly feel less weighed down by circumstances—a little more optimistic about the future.
Hope made a sound in her sleep, and he found himself looking over his shoulder at her, and smiling.
Having her to tend to had also helped to elevate his mood. He’d helped to birth and handled so many babies, including his own children, but that sense of falling in love with each infant never waned. It was their total innocence, and the knowledge that here was a new life just beginning, that always touched his heart.
Watching Nya feed her had filled him with warmth. It was obvious she felt the same way about Hope that he did—that although they were in the infant’s life for just a short time, they would do whatever necessary to protect and nurture her.
Hopefully the police would find her mother or father quickly, and the reunion would be a safe and successful one. No one deserved to feel alone and abandoned.
Those kinds of scars were difficult to heal.
Why that made him think of Nya, he didn’t want to contemplate, so he went back to his desk and pulled up the next journal he wanted to read. With one more quick glance at the sleeping baby, he turned his attention to his computer screen, and lost himself in a study about the effect of influenza during pregnancy.
When a soft knock came on his door, and Hope stirred, Theo was surprised to realise the afternoon was almost gone. He wasn’t terribly surprised to see Nya come in, but there was an air of suppressed excitement about her that had him looking at her closely as he picked Hope up.
‘I heard from Caroline, at Social Services,’ she said, and he couldn’t help noticing how her eyes sparkled, and she was smiling. ‘They’re having a very difficult time finding a fosterer to take Hope.’
‘Oh?’ He gave her a sideways glance as she came up beside him to watch him change Hope’s nappy.
‘She explained that there had been a fall-off of people volunteering to foster over the past two years. And at this time of the year, with Christmas so close, it’s even harder than usual to find a foster parent at short notice.’
Theo didn’t even think about it. As he turned to face Nya, Hope in his arms, he said, ‘I’ll foster her. For at least as long as I’m on leave from the hospital. That’ll give them a chance to find her mother, or a permanent fosterer.’
‘Oh...’ Nya exhaled, and her smile faded away. It was as though she deflated right in front of his eyes.
‘What is it?’ he asked, resting a hand on her arm when she would have stepped aside, and holding her gaze.
‘Oh, it’s just that...’
When she hesitated, Theo joggled her arm. ‘Tell me.’
Her eyes glittered, and he realised it was tears making them gleam.
‘Well, I was planning to foster Hope myself.’
She was holding herself stiffly, and tried to look unconcerned, but although the moisture had disappeared from her eyes, he could easily see she was still upset and trying not to show it.
‘Here.’ He motioned for her to take Hope from him, and Nya didn’t hesitate. In a trice she had the infant snuggled close. ‘Sit down, and let’s discuss this.’
‘I don’t know that there’s anything to talk about,’ she said as she walked to the armchair and subsided into it. ‘You’re actually a better choice than I am. I can’t take holidays now, because I have a trainee, a new midwife, and we’re one midwife short too. You fostering Hope makes far more sense.’
She was right, but seeing Nya’s tender expression as she looked down at a relaxed and cooing Hope, he knew not fostering the baby would be a huge disappointment to his friend.
‘We could share the position as Hope’s fosterers,’ he said, again without giving it any thought, but he knew he’d made the best suggestion when her face lit up.
‘I’d love that. If you don’t mind? I can have her at night, and you can look after her during the day, while I’m working.’
Time to tread gently here. Knowing Nya’s strength of will, he didn’t want to put her back up.
‘Are you sure you’ll be able to get enough sleep, if you have her at night?’
Nya hardly spared him a glance.
‘Single mums do it all the time. I’ll be fine. Besides, I rarely sleep more than four or five hours a night.’
‘I didn’t know that.’
That brought her head up, and she gave him a wide grin. ‘You’ve only known me for twenty years. Normally, you’d only get that type of information after twenty-five. This constitutes special circumstances.’
He couldn’t help chuckling, and it occurred to him that he hadn’t laughed as much in ages as he had today.
‘So, is it that you don’t go to bed until late, or do you wake up extremely early?’
‘It depends. Sometimes, if I’ve had a particularly hard day, I’ll go to bed early—by ten. Otherwise, I’m up until at least midnight.’
Theo nodded. ‘I’m something of a night owl myself,’ he admitted. ‘But if you find yourself getting sleep deprived, just let me know and I’ll take Hope for a night or two.’
‘I’ll have some days off during the time leading up to Christmas, and I can catch up on sleep then.’
She was smiling again—almost glowing—and Theo couldn’t take his eyes off her face.
‘That’s settled, then,’ he said, earning another of her wide grins. ‘I’ll call Caroline and let her know what we’ve decided—that we’ll share the care of Hope until at least the end of the year. I’m sure she’ll have a mountain of paperwork she’ll need us to fill out.’
‘Normally the last thing I want to do,’ Nya said, smiling at Hope and stroking one chubby baby cheek with the backs of her fingers. ‘But I’ll gladly do it for you, sweetheart.’
And the warmth that filled Theo’s chest felt so good, he ignored the little voice in the back of his mind, telling him to be careful of what he was getting into.
That one round of heartache was more than enough, and he was definitely courting another.
By the time they’d got all the legal details dealt with, it was getting late, so Theo said he’d call down to The Dolphin and ask the publican Davy Trewelyn to send dinner up for them.
‘Lovely,’ she told him, casting an eye over the pile of nappies, babygrows, wipes, and other necessaries, ticking things off the list in her head. ‘By the time you get home, you won’t want to have to cook.’
‘And you won’t have time to,’ he replied in that low sing-song voice that let her know he was talking to Hope rather than her. ‘Right, Hope?’
‘Tomorrow I’ll get a car seat for her on my lunchtime,’ she said. ‘Thankfully Marnie said she wasn’t planning to take Violet anywhere tomorrow, and we could borrow hers tonight. And the carrycot from the nursery here will do as a place for her to sleep tonight too, but it will make sense for both of us to have one, rather than have to take it back and forth.’
‘Don’t worry about that,’ Theo told her. ‘Give me a list and I’ll order everything online tonight for one-day delivery.’
‘You don’t have to—’
Theo held up his hand and shook his head.
‘Just let me buy my girl some things, please? I want to.’
It was on the tip of her tongue to warn him not to get attached—that this was a temporary situation—but he looked so happy and appealing, Nya kept the thought to herself.
Besides, she was having just as hard a time reminding herself of that fact too.
Since she’d walked to work that morning, after they’d eaten they packed everything into Theo’s car, and he drove her and Hope to her cottage. Nya had used the app on her phone to turn on some lights at home, including her outdoor Christmas lights, and as they drew up she cast a critical eye over the modest display.
‘I need more decorations outside, I think,’ she said to Theo as he switched off the engine. ‘Somehow each year I end up doing less than the year before. Or I suddenly can’t find strings of lights I was sure I had and get frustrated.’
‘It looks lovely,’ he replied as he opened his door. ‘Very cheery indeed.’
‘Have you put up your decorations yet?’ she asked, opening her door as well so as to swing her legs out.
‘No. I haven’t got around to it.’
If voices could have a ‘keep out’ sign attached, Theo’s did just then. The way his voice cooled had her wondering if there was more to the story than just not having time to deal with the holidays yet.
Going into the cottage in front of him, carrying Hope in the borrowed car seat, she directed him where to put the packages. Then she bustled about, putting supplies away in an orderly way, so she knew where to find them.
‘Who knew that one tiny baby could need so many things?’ she said, stifling a giggle. ‘I never thought I’d need more counter space in my lifetime.’
Theo smiled and shook his head. ‘It does look like a lot, doesn’t it?’
Hope chose that moment to awaken, and before Nya could go to her, Theo was there, lifting her from the carrier, checking whether it was a nappy change or feeding time again.
Nya stayed where she was, watching him, wondering why her heartbeat was suddenly so erratic, and tingles were firing along her spine at the sight of the pair.
Then she gave herself a mental shake.
It had been an emotional day—at least for her. And now she had the wonderful prospect of taking care of Hope for a month or so, until a permanent fosterer or her parents could be found, to look forward to. No wonder she was feeling a little gooey on the inside at the sight of a handsome man holding a tiny baby.
Almost any woman would, wouldn’t they?
Theo was almost finished changing Hope’s nappy, and although Nya was assailed with the wish that he didn’t have to go, she forced herself to say, ‘We have to remember to put the car-seat base into my car, so I have it for the morning. What time should I bring Hope over to you?’
He sent her a glance over his shoulder and shrugged. ‘Whenever you get there will be fine. I’m usually up early to go for a run, but if I know you’re coming before eight, I’ll stay home.’
Suddenly the image of him in running attire popped into her head, sending a rush of heat out through her veins, and it took a moment to get her brain back into working order.
‘No...no. Go for your run. My first appointment is at nine, so I’ll bring her by at about eight-fifteen.’
All too soon he was handing her Hope and taking her car keys so as to transfer the car-seat base, and then coming back in to take his leave.
Hope was starting to fuss a bit, ready for her next feed, so Theo didn’t linger.
‘See you both in the morning,’ he said, before bending to kiss the top of Hope’s head.
Then, before Nya realised what was happening, his lips—warm and firm, yet wonderfully soft—were on her cheek, seeming to linger on her skin for an eon, before he straightened.
Something in his eyes had her heart galloping along like a runaway horse, and all she could do was stare up at him, until he suddenly swung around and headed for the door.
Finding her voice, she called, ‘Night,’ and got a wave in return.
Then he was gone.
As she was warming Hope’s bottle, Nya thought back on the day and the roller coaster of emotions she’d been on.
Jim, and Mum, and Hope, and Theo. Each played a role. But Nya’s head kept taking her back to that moment when she’d seen Theo come through the door at Carey House, and the way her body had reacted.
It was just Theo, after all. Long-time friend and co-worker.
A man obviously struggling with everything life had thrown at him over the last couple of years.
Someone she wanted to see happy again, instead of so often stern and sad.
Hope spat out the nipple, then rooted about for it again, making Nya giggle. It seemed the baby’s favourite trick.
‘There you go,’ she said, lining it up for her again, making encouraging noises as the infant went back to her bottle.
Once upon a time, so long ago now it seemed just a dream, she and Jim had talked about the children they hoped to have. Two boys, he’d insisted, so they’d have each other to torment and fight with, and at least three girls.
When she’d laughingly asked him why three, Jim had said, ‘Because then they can take turns looking after me when I’m in my dotage, and when one gets tired of my tricks, she can send me off to the next.’
She’d agreed, even as she’d shaken her head at the thought. Five children were too many, in her book, but since all that childbearing had then been in the future, it had been easy to go along with him.
And of course, none of that had happened.
When she’d lost Jim, the thought of children had been put aside. She couldn’t envision herself parenting with anyone other than him—had never even really tried to find another relationship. He had been one of a kind, but when she’d said as much to her mother, Iona had shaken her head and given Nya a stern look.
‘Each of us is one of a kind, and different. If you spend your time trying to find another Jim, you’re going to be sorely disappointed. Look for—find—another one-of-a-kind man who will love you differently, but just as much. You deserve that.’
‘I don’t want anyone else,’ she’d replied, which had led to that heated discussion between them. And the unspoken agreement not to speak about it any more that Mum had broken earlier in the day.
A welter of emotions washed through her as she rocked Hope and let her thoughts wander where they would, seeking some kind of peace and clarity, both of which proved elusive.
‘Oh, Jim,’ she whispered finally, shaking her head. ‘How I miss you still.’
But that night, after she got Hope settled and climbed into her own bed, it was Theo Turner’s face that floated up into her mind and followed her into slumber.