NYA WOKE UP the next morning ridiculously early, with memories of the night before flooding through her, stirring her libido anew. When she took stock and realised she was alone in the bed, she rolled over to stare up at the ceiling, taking note of muscles that usually didn’t ache, but were making themselves felt today.
Had it really happened? Had she really made love with Theo? Not just made love, which seemed to suggest something inherently gentle and sweet, but pretty much held him down and had her wicked way with him?
And it had been bloody brilliant.
Earth-shaking, mind-shattering, ego-boosting, orgasm city.
And utterly stupid.
Stuffing the edge of a pillow into her mouth to muffle her manic, close to hysterical laughter, Nya let herself go for a moment, trying to release the tension.
Oh, it had been magical. She hadn’t even known she could feel that way—that it was possible for her to be that insatiable. But yes, it was also the last thing she should have done.
She’d been warned about the pain she would be opening herself up to. And she’d warned herself as well.
There was no future for her and Theo, and giving in to the attraction was a great way to hasten and intensify the future heartbreak.
So now she was left trying to figure out just how to extricate herself from a situation she actually didn’t want to get out of, but darn well knew she had to.
If last night had proven anything, it was that Theo Turner’s brand of loving could very well be addictive, and she couldn’t afford to get hooked. Falling for a man who obviously was still grieving the end of his marriage, and who was planning an escape from the one place Nya felt safe?
Absolute foolishness.
Just the thought of it made her heart race, and had sweat breaking out on her forehead, as the remnants of her post-coital glow drained away, leaving her scared and shaky.
It would be easy to tell herself it was just the relief of hearing Hope was going to be okay that had made her susceptible to Theo’s kisses, but she knew she’d be lying. The very least she could do was be honest with herself.
She’d fallen for Theo, probably from the first time she’d seen him holding Hope. Maybe, a little voice whispered in the back of her mind, from before that—when he was still a part of ‘Theo and Femi’. Although she would never have allowed herself to even think of him as anything other than a friend while he was married, she’d always had a special place in her heart for him.
His quiet charm. The way he lit up a room, and made others feel important. His tenderness to and care for his patients.
And now she knew he was also a skilful and considerate lover, which just made him seem far too perfect.
Although she knew exactly how she felt about him, there was no way in hell she was letting Theo know.
Sitting up in bed, she came to a decision.
If—when—he brought it up, she’d tell him it was the joy of hearing about Hope, coupled with her exhaustion, that had created the perfect storm. That she’d reacted instinctively, and wantonly, and while she didn’t regret it, it wouldn’t happen again.
Couldn’t happen again...
Thus determined, she swung her feet to the floor, and took a deep breath, trying to slow her heart rate.
There were no sounds from outside and as she turned on the light beside the bed she wondered where Theo was.
Obviously he’d been up for a bit before her, and her sleep had been so deep, he’d been able to come and go in the room without waking her, since her clothes, neatly folded, were on a nearby chair.
They were a reminder of the night before, and Nya blushed to see them. Then she drew herself up.
She was a grown woman, not a teenager, even if being around Theo made her feel like one.
No. If she was going to get through the next few weeks, she was going to have to brazen it out—pretend a sophistication she didn’t possess. She’d put on her undies and shirt and march out of the room as though this weren’t the first time in too many years to count that a man had seen her naked. As though she couldn’t care less and her heart weren’t about to thump its way out of her chest.
Thus buoyed, she all but flung open the bedroom door, and was instantly deflated when she realised the flat rang with the kind of echoing silence that indicated it was empty.
Well, so much for sophistication.
Wandering farther into the room, she saw a note on the kitchen island and went to read it.
Theo had gone to get them breakfast.
Nya shook her head. Why on earth did the damn man have to be so perfect?
At least she didn’t have to face him just yet, and could have a shower and be properly clothed by the time he got back.
But by the time she was finished getting ready he still wasn’t back, and Nya was tired of feeling as though she was on tenterhooks. Calling the hospital to check on Hope’s progress took up some of the time, but not enough to calm her down.
Suddenly, she remembered she hadn’t called her mother to give her the good news about Hope, and since it was now late enough to do so without waking Mum up, she put through the call.
The happiness in Mum’s voice mirrored Nya’s own.
‘Oh, thank goodness. You and Theo must be so relieved.’
‘We are,’ she replied, refusing to let her brain relive exactly where that relief had led them. ‘He’s gone to get us some breakfast, and then we’re going to the hospital.’
Mum’s sigh spoke volumes. ‘He’s such a good man. Seeing him with that little girl just about melts my icy heart.’
Nya couldn’t help laughing. ‘Really, Mum? Well, you know he’s single now. Maybe—’
‘Ha. Just you stop right there. I’m rather hoping he’ll melt your heart and get you to live again.’
If only you knew...
But there was no way she’d entertain that kind of conversation with her mother.
‘Mum, I told you, we’re—’
‘Just friends. Yes, you’ve mentioned that ad nauseam. That hasn’t stopped me from hoping.’
‘Mum, it’s not like that, so don’t get your hopes up. In fact, between you and me, I think Theo is planning to leave Carey Cove, so even if there was something between us—which there isn’t—it wouldn’t be serious, anyway.’
Mum was quiet for so long, Nya was beginning to think the conversation was over, but then a sigh came down the line.
‘Nya, why does everything have to be serious? Nothing is meant to last for ever. Sometimes you just need to enjoy the moments.’
It wasn’t the first time they’d had this conversation, and Nya didn’t really want to have it again.
Especially not now.
‘All right, Mum. I’ll think about what you’re saying.’
Iona sighed again. ‘I doubt it, love. Kiss Hope for me and let me know when she’s coming home.’
‘I will.’ Just then she heard Theo’s key in the door, and added, ‘I have to go. I’ll call again later and update you, when I know what’s happening.’
Hanging up, she turned to face Theo, who was putting a couple of bags down on the counter, and had to forcibly push aside the urge to cross the room to him. Hold him tight. Kiss him.
Take him back to bed.
‘Good morning,’ he said, smiling, although his gaze was searching her face, as though trying to decide what her reaction to him would be. ‘Sorry I was so long, but it seems I was just one of a long line of people trying to get fed. The café was terribly busy.’
Time to make it plain the night before was a one-off. She made her voice brisk, as though they were discussing a patient back at Carey House. ‘It’s fine. I haven’t been up that long anyway.’
She saw his eyes narrow, and then he turned away to open the cupboard where the plates were kept.
‘Come on, then,’ he said. ‘Let’s eat, and then get to the hospital. I just spoke to Herman Porter, and he’s prepared to release Hope later this morning.’
‘Oh, how wonderful!’
‘Yes,’ he replied, but in an absent tone, as though his thoughts were elsewhere. Then he turned to face her again, and her heart did a flip at his expression. ‘Nya—’
His phone rang, interrupting whatever it was he’d planned to say, and, with an impatient sound, he picked it up and answered.
‘Theo Turner. Yes. What?’ He turned and walked away from her, leaving Nya staring at his back. ‘Where? Yes, I’m familiar with it. Yes. We’ll come as soon as possible.’
For a few moments after he hung up, he stayed where he was, staring out of the window, then he faced her, his expression inscrutable.
‘That was the police. They’ve found Hope’s mother.’
And Nya felt as though the bottom dropped out of her world all over again.
‘Where is she?’ she asked as she sank down onto the nearest chair.
‘At Longworth Hospital, in Truro. She came in and was diagnosed with a thrombotic pulmonary embolism, and eventually admitted she’d given birth three weeks ago. We’ve been asked to attend at the hospital with Hope.’
‘But...’
There was no way to articulate the pain sitting like a band around her chest, stealing her breath.
Theo glanced at his watch.
‘How soon can you be ready?’
Nya dug deep, reaching for and finding the professionalism and strength that had seen her through everything life had thrown her way.
After all, she’d known this day would come. Later, when she was back home, she’d break down but, for now, there were things that needed to be dealt with.
She got up, keeping her back straight and her chin up.
‘I’m ready now. I think, since Hope hasn’t been released yet, we should go back to Carey Cove and collect her things, then come back to pick her up. At least her mum will have whatever she needs for the time being.’
‘Good idea.’ He nodded towards the bags he’d just brought in. ‘Do you mind eating while we’re driving? I’d like to get on the road as soon as possible.’
‘Of course.’ Forcing her trembling legs to move, she walked blindly towards the guest room. ‘I’ll just get my things together.’
This, then, was how it all would end. The all too brief slice of happiness she’d found was about to disappear.
Another heartbreak had found her—and she wasn’t sure she knew how to get over this one.
Theo watched Nya until she disappeared down the hallway, then turned away, scrubbing a hand over his face, which had gone numb as he’d spoken to the constable.
Even though, as a doctor, he’d experienced some events others would perhaps classify as unbelievable, he’d never really believed in miracles, until last night.
Holding Nya, he’d felt as though this Christmas he was being offered something as close to miraculous as he’d ever had.
A new beginning. A second-chance family. More joy than he’d felt in years.
But even then, he’d known it was just a fantasy, and Nya’s reception this morning, along with Hope’s mum reappearing, showed him he’d been right to think it couldn’t last.
Had it only been less than two weeks since he’d found Hope on the doorstep at Carey House? He felt as though he’d lived a lifetime since then. A glorious, wonderful lifetime, where the pain and guilt and stress he’d been living with had melted away, and he’d felt renewed.
Somewhere along the line he’d forgotten being Hope’s carer was only temporary. And last night, lost in ecstasy, he’d forgotten that Nya’s heart wasn’t his to win—that it had already been given, lock, stock, and barrel, and there was no space left in it for him.
How ironic to finally find a path forward, after feeling so lost and stuck, only to realise it had just been a mirage.
There was nothing he could do to make any of it less painful. Wishing they could go back to a week ago, reliving the days before Hope got ill, was fruitless. It was time to face reality and face his responsibility to both Hope and Nya—which was to let them go without a fuss.
‘I’m ready.’
Nya sounded so cool and in control, Theo felt a spurt of anger, but he tamped it down. At least one of them was dealing well with the situation.
Without looking at her, he headed for the door, grabbing the bags of food and his car keys on the way.
‘Let’s go,’ he said, knowing how terse he sounded, but unable to help it. ‘It’s going to be a long day.’
Long, and extremely painful.