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CERYN IS CAREFUL AS she moves through the castle corridors to Ginata’s rooms. She can take care of herself certainly, but if she’s outnumbered she might not come out on top.
She knocks the door and then turns the handle and pushes it open. Ginata has three rooms that connect and this first one is empty. Millard’s crown is still on the table. She picks it up; she’ll give it to Everleigh. The second room is empty and so is the last.
Ceryn sighs. It’s not safe for any of them to be anywhere other than all together but Ginata didn’t want to stay with them, and now she’s not even in her rooms.
She stomps back to Everleigh’s room, handing her the crown. Everleigh touches the jewels, tears misting her eyes. She places it on the table.
Ceryn throws herself onto a chair. “She’s gone.”
“Gone where?”
“Who knows? Who cares? I’m not going to look for her.”
“Ceryn...”
“What? She didn’t want to stay here and now she disappeared altogether.”
“Maybe she’s just popped to the kitchen or something?”
“Maybe, but I’m not going to search for her.”
“Archer?” Everleigh looks helpless.
“I wouldn’t worry, Everleigh. Of all of us, Ginata is probably the safest. Millard doesn’t know that she’s on our side. If one of his men does see her, it’s not likely that they’ll hurt her.”
“Where is she though? Why would she be wandering around?”
“She’s not worried, obviously. Maybe she just wants to act normally in case Millard comes back. And if he does, we could do with her still appearing to be on his side.”
“I suppose. I just worry. And she knows that.”
“Exactly. So she should be here with the rest of us.” Ceryn is angry and happy to show it. “There’s something off with her and I don’t know what it is.”
“It’s just a horrible time. Everyone’s upset. None of us knows what’s going to happen next. And Ginata has to crown me. That’s a big responsibility for her. I feel for her, having to spend all that time with my brother. He’s not very nice.”
“I know all of that, but...” Ceryn shrugs. “I just think she should be here, that’s all.”
***
GINATA HAS LEFT HER rooms, and the castle, and is walking the familiar path back to her cottage. She needs to be alone and the castle walls feel like they are closing in on her.
All she can think about is how she has betrayed Everleigh and all she wanted to do is leave. So she did.
Going home will help her, even though none of her things are there any more. Her little cottage was home for many happy years. Being there will help her to ground herself, find herself again.
She’ll light a fire, and let her mind find peace and when she feels better she’ll head back to the castle.
She needs to come to terms with her actions and her feelings and she needs to be away from the castle to do it.
Since Macsen came to her door looking for a death draught and brought her into this whole mess, she’s been swept along into the drama, like an innocent mouse who falls in the river and gets dragged away in the flow.
None of it has been her choice; not helping Macsen, or making the death draught with Halfreda, or crowning Millard. Not watching Halfreda die, taking her place in the castle, in the dead King’s rooms, pretending to be on Millard’s side.
If her life is to be her own to live and her own to make choices about then what will her choice be?