Sharing appetizers or small plates––at a tapas restaurant, for instance––can sometimes be a stressful experience. You have to negotiate “being polite” with the animal instinct to hiss opponents away from your share of the food. And ordering can be stressful, too … especially with a big group. You don’t want to push your own ordering agenda too hard, but sometimes you really just want one thing. If it were up to you, the plan would be to order fifteen tiny plates of the tiny meatballs. But there are vegetarians to consider … and, generally, no one is really voicing what they want. So the group orders one of everything. And, inevitably, you end up in the tapas ghetto with a deviled egg someone split in half.
We have a trick for surviving small-plate dinners with large groups. The trick is: eat a small meal ahead of time. Don’t expect to eat anything at the dinner party. But do expect to pay. And make sure to bring cash so you can get out of there quickly. And not just twenties––bring small bills.
—FRED AND CARRIE
Dear Best Friends a Girl Could Ask For,I want to thank each and every one of you for joining me in celebration of my 32nd (eek! 
) birthday.
There is nothing that Lance and I would have liked to do more than have almost everyone I know sitting together at a huge table. And even though Lance wasn’t there, Lance would have LOVED to be there.… As it turns out, he had an even bigger surprise planned for me the whole time, so not showing up was kind of a little trick that was part of the EVEN BIGGER surprise. (You wouldn’t believe what he did, it was so romantic.)
Anyway, just a little Thank-You Note to say that I hope you enjoyed the VIP room at the restaurant. I also hope you loved all of the tapas, which were hand-picked from the menu by me. I just thought tapas would be a good idea because it would be fun to just have cute little plates, and everyone could try a little bite of something and trade plates with the person next to them and try a little bite of something else and then pass the plate or trade for a little bite of some other yummy little thing. I think we can all agree that the top tapas were:
the bread and mushroom one
those little cheesy meat-filled dates
pork peppers
What was that tortilla (Spanish omelet) with the little chips? What was that called?? SO YUMMY.
I asked the restaurant for the recipes so we can make them at home!
Anyway, only 357 days until my next birthday party. Who knows what the theme next year will be?! It’s too early to start planning, he-he. But please make sure you save the date.
With our deepest Love and Gratitude,
Nina and Lance
SERVES 6
1 lemon, halved, plus 2 tablespoons freshly squeezed lemon juice
1½ pounds baby artichokes
2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
16 ounces mixed wild mushrooms, such as shiitake, cremini, oyster, or chanterelles, stemmed and thinly sliced (about 6 cups)
1 large shallot, finely chopped (about ¼ cup)
Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper
2 tablespoons cognac
½ cup dry white wine, such as Albariño or Vinho Verde
½ cup low-sodium chicken broth
1 tablespoon chopped fresh savory or thyme
2 tablespoons unsalted butter
6 slices multigrain bread, toasted
1 garlic clove
1 Fill a bowl with water, squeeze the halved lemon into it, and then add the lemon halves. Pluck off the outer leaves of the artichokes, revealing a yellow-green core. Using a serrated knife, trim off the top third. Cut the artichokes into thin wedges and add them to the lemon water to prevent oxidizing.
2 In a large skillet, heat the oil until shimmering. Add the mushrooms and shallots. Season with salt and pepper to taste and cook over high heat, stirring once or twice, until browned, about 7 minutes.
3 Drain the artichokes, shaking off the excess water, and add them to the skillet. Stir and cook for 2 minutes.
4 Add the cognac and cook until evaporated.
5 Add the wine, broth, lemon juice, and savory, and season lightly with salt and pepper. Cover and simmer over medium heat until the artichokes are tender, about 5 minutes.
6 Remove the lid and cook until the liquid is nearly evaporated, 5 to 6 minutes. Stir in the butter.
7 Rub the toast on one side with the garlic clove and set on a platter. Spoon the vegetable mixture on top and serve right away.
Make ahead: The mushroom and artichoke mixture can be refrigerated overnight. Rewarm, adding a few tablespoons of water to loosen the mixture.
SAUTÉED SHRIMP WITH PIQUILLOS, OLIVES, AND PORK BELLY
SERVES 4 TO 6Kosher salt
4-ounce slice of pork belly, about ½ inch thick
3 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
12 ounces medium shrimp, shelled and deveined
2 large garlic cloves, thinly sliced
½ teaspoon smoked Spanish paprika
¼ cup sliced piquillo peppers
¼ cup coarsely chopped green Spanish olives
¼ cup dry white wine, such as Albariño
Crusty bread, for serving
1 Bring a medium saucepan of salted water to a boil. Add the pork belly and boil for 3 minutes. Drain, pat dry, and let cool.
2 Slice the pork belly into ¼-inch pieces.
3 In a large skillet, heat the oil. Add the pork belly and cook over medium-high heat, stirring occasionally, until crisp all over, about 5 minutes. Be careful about spattering oil. Using a slotted spoon, transfer the pork to a plate.
4 Add the shrimp, garlic, and paprika. Season with salt and cook over medium-high heat, stirring frequently, until the shrimp are just pink, about 1½ minutes. Add the peppers, olives, and wine and simmer until the liquid is reduced by half, about 1 minute. Add the pork and simmer for 1 minute. Serve right away with plenty of crusty bread.
MAKES 48 PIECES24 Medjool dates
⅓ cup (about 2 ounces) finely chopped serrano ham
½ cup shredded Manchego cheese (about 3 ounces)
24 Marcona almonds
1 Preheat the oven to 350°F. Make a small slash into each date and remove the pits, keeping them as intact as possible. Fill the cavities with ham, cheese, and almonds. Close slightly and transfer to a baking sheet.
2 Bake until warm and the cheese is melted, 8 to 10 minutes.
3 Transfer the dates to a platter and serve warm.
Make ahead: The dates can be stuffed and refrigerated overnight.
SERVES 612 large eggs
1 5-ounce bag of flavored potato chips, lightly crushed (Black Pepper & Sea Salt; Crab; Bacon; Crawfish; Thai, etc.)
2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
3 large scallions, sliced
3 ounces Spanish chorizo, finely chopped
Bread, for serving
1 Preheat the broiler and position a rack 8 inches from the heat.
2 In a large bowl, beat the eggs. Add the potato chips and let soak for 10 minutes.
3 In a large ovenproof nonstick skillet, heat the oil until shimmering. Add the scallions and chorizo and cook over high heat, stirring, until the chorizo has rendered its fat, about 2 to 3 minutes.
4 Add the potato chip–egg mixture, stirring to combine with the chorizo mixture. Cook over medium-high heat until the bottom and sides are set, about 3 minutes.
5 Broil the tortilla until the top is lightly browned and the eggs are set, 3 to 4 minutes longer. Slide the tortilla onto a plate, cut into wedges, and serve hot, warm, or at room temperature.
Garmin
I’M A LITTLE GUY
Hey. My name is Garmin. I’m a little guy. My fingers are small, my teeth are little, and my metabolism is super-fast. I eat small meals all throughout the day, and I eat them quickly! Then I talk a lot about what I ate. I can talk really fast because it takes less energy to use my voice. I’m a little guy!
TOTAL: 3 HOURS PLUS OVERNIGHT COOLING SERVES 4 FOR MAIN COURSE OR 8 AS AN APPETIZER2 medium racks (about 3 pounds) of spareribs, split lengthwise in half (see Note)
6 large garlic cloves, smashed
1 large onion, quartered
1 serrano chile or jalapeño, halved
4 lemongrass stalks, lightly smashed
8 ¼-inch slices fresh, peeled ginger
2 cups low-sodium chicken broth
½ cup soy sauce
½ cup cornstarch
½ cup all-purpose flour
Vegetable oil, for frying
Note: Have your butcher cut the racks lengthwise into riblets for you.
¼ cup orange marmalade
¼ cup low-sodium chicken broth (or braising liquid from the ribs)
2 tablespoons ketchup
2 tablespoons mustard
1 tablespoon sesame oil
1 tablespoon Asian fish sauce
2 tablespoons Korean chili flakes (or Aleppo pepper flakes or 1 tablespoon crushed red pepper flakes)
2 tablespoons kosher salt
1 Make the ribs: Preheat the oven to 350°F. Place the ribs into a large, heavy Dutch oven and add the garlic, onion, chile, lemongrass, ginger, broth, soy sauce, and 4 cups of water. Bring to a boil, uncovered.
2 Cover and braise in the oven until the ribs are tender, but not falling off the bone, about 2 hours. Occasionally turn the riblets in the liquid.
3 Transfer the riblets to a platter, pat dry, and refrigerate until very cold, about 4 hours, preferably overnight. Strain the cooking liquid, pour off the fat, and reserve for another use.
4 Cut the cold riblets between the bones and transfer to a large paper bag. In a small bowl, whisk the cornstarch and flour and add it to the ribs. Close the bag and shake until the riblets are coated. Turn the riblets out onto another paper bag and tap off the excess flour.
5 In a large saucepan, heat 2 inches of oil to 375°F. Working in 3 or 4 batches, fry the riblets, trying to maintain the heat at 360°F, until browned and crusty, about 6 minutes per batch. Drain on paper and continue with the remaining ribs.
6 Meanwhile, make the glaze: In a blender or mini food processor, puree the marmalade, broth, ketchup, mustard, sesame oil, and fish sauce and transfer to a small saucepan. Simmer over medium heat until glossy, about 5 minutes. In a small bowl, combine the Korean chile flakes and salt.
7 Transfer the riblets to a large bowl and toss with two-thirds of the sauce. Arrange on a platter and sprinkle with the chile-salt mixture. Serve with the remaining sauce on the side.
Make ahead: The riblets (un-fried) and glaze can be refrigerated separately for up to 5 days.
Garmin again! You might remember me from the other page over there. But maybe not, because I’m a little guy. I can dart around and slip in and out of places without people noticing me sometimes. I had some leftover energy, so I made this little guide to my favorite things to eat in Portland. If you don’t feel like cooking at home, these are the best places to go. I know where the best places are because I’ve been all over the city with my scavenger hunt team. And when I do that much running around I get very hungry, so I keep eating and eating and eating. I’ve tried the food at practically every single place.
Welcome to
Around the World
in 80 Plates.
Hello, I’m Johnny. As the first stop on your journey across the seven seas of flavor, I am pleased to present our World-Famous Sides ’n’ Stuff! appetizer menu. As you wander across this Map of Apps you will uncover that each app is a fun fusion of your favorite finger foods. And good news, explorers: all these apps (minus the cheese boats) can be served on a skewer, stacked in a pyramid, in a souvenir globe, in a waffle fry basket, or even wrapped in a lettuce cup if you’re looking to lighten your load. Cheese boats can only be served in baked potatoes.
• Crispy Cheese
• Duck Triangles
• Buffalo Bombers
• Cheese Boats
• Potato Tornados
• Chicken Crusters
• Beef Dingers
• Deep-Fried Salad
• Crusty Chicken Crusters
• The Rachel
• Quadruple Dippers
• Zing the Blues
• The Perfect Egg Roll
• Cheesy Beefees
* SIDES ’N’ STUFF ARE ALSO AVAILABLE ON A BORING, TYPICAL PLATE.
TOTAL: 45 MINUTES SERVES 6 TO 82 slices good-quality packaged white bread, shredded
2 tablespoons half-and-half or milk
1 large egg
2 scallions, minced
2 garlic cloves, minced
1 large jalapeño, seeded and minced
2 tablespoons chopped fresh cilantro
1½ teaspoons kosher salt
¾ pound ground sirloin
¾ pound ground chuck
Vegetable oil, for brushing the pan
2 ounces pepper jack cheese, cut into 24 ½-inch cubes
¼ cup plus 2 tablespoons freshly grated Parmigiano-Reggiano
1 Preheat the oven to 425°F and position a rack on the upper shelf.
2 In a large bowl, combine the bread, half-and-half, and egg and squeeze to a paste.
3 Add the scallions, garlic, jalapeño, cilantro, and salt and stir to combine.
4 Add the sirloin and chuck and work with your hands until evenly combined.
5 Brush a nonstick baking sheet with oil. Form the meat into 24 balls, using lightly moistened hands. Tuck a cube of the pepper jack cheese into each meatball and seal. Arrange the meatballs on the baking sheet and roast until firm and lightly browned, about 12 minutes.
6 Remove the baking sheet from the oven and turn the oven up to Broil.
7 Transfer the meatballs to a large bowl and toss with ¼ cup of the grated Parmigiano-Romano. Return the meatballs to the baking sheet, spacing them very closely together, and sprinkle with the remaining 2 tablespoons of the grated cheese.
8 Broil on the top rack, watching carefully until browned and sizzling, 2 to 3 minutes longer, shifting the pan for even browning. Transfer to a platter and serve with toothpicks and napkins.
Rock Star Chefs
FOOD PHOTOGRAPHY
When photographing chefs for magazines or dining guides, make sure to have them hold the food in an unnatural way that seems awkward and rock-and-roll-y. Play hip-hop music really loud. Make sure to get them to spill things. Dump things. Like they don’t even need the ingredients anymore. Flour makes really good clouds. They should maybe hop up on the stove. We recommend these Brussels sprouts because they are easy to indifferently throw at the camera.
SERVES 6½ cup hazelnuts
1 pound medium-size Brussels sprouts (walnut size), trimmed and halved
3 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper
4 ounces thick-cut bacon, cut into ½-inch pieces
1 large shallot, very thinly sliced (about ½ cup)
2 tablespoons sherry vinegar
1 Preheat the oven to 350°F. Spread the hazelnuts on a pie plate and toast until fragrant and the skins blister, about 12 minutes. Let cool, then rub the hazelnuts together in a clean kitchen towel to remove the skins. Coarsely chop the nuts.
2 In a bowl, toss the Brussels sprouts with the oil and season with salt and pepper to taste. Heat a large skillet until very hot. Add the Brussels sprouts, cut side down, and cook over high heat until browned, about 5 minutes. Flip the Brussels sprouts, cover, and cook until crisp-tender, about 3 minutes longer. Transfer to a plate.
3 Add the bacon to the pan and cook over medium heat until crisp and browned, about 5 minutes.
4 Add the shallots and cook, stirring, until softened and lightly browned, about 5 minutes.
5 Add the Brussels sprouts and toss to combine. Add the vinegar and cook until the vinegar is nearly evaporated.
6 Stir in the hazelnuts and serve right away.
Doug here. Before you set out to watch the first episode of a new TV series, it is important to stockpile your house with nonperishable snacks like popcorn. The reason popcorn became so popular is because of Television. Food scientists came up with it in the ’50s at the same time TV was invented. The whole idea was that you can cook the entire popcorn bag in three minutes—the same amount of time that commercials last—and you don’t miss anything good. And they discovered it’s something that you can keep eating and eating and eating throughout a ton of episodes, and you never get like bloaty and full and sleepy and have to go to bed.
For different meals of the day, Claire and I sometimes add different flavorings to our popcorn. That’s something we discovered ourselves one time when I had some leftover Parmesan cheese packets from a pizza we ordered. It’s easy to just quickly sprinkle different stuff on. So for lunch you can have nacho cheese popcorn, which is … just so good. And then for dinner you can have things like: Spicy Red Pepper Packet Popcorn, Melted-Cheese-on-It Popcorn, or Peanut Sauce Popcorn. For dessert I’d recommend Cookies ’n’ Popcorn or Sour Patch Kid Dust Popcorn. Claire and I come up with new recipes almost every day, depending on what’s around.
Hey! This is Claire. Just got back from work so thought I’d weigh in and quickly add that eating only popcorn is probably not healthy for you. You need a little protein at least. My friend from work came over the other day to watch the season finale of Thrones. She brought these wings, which were pretty great.… I’m including the recipe here.
Yeah! The wings Claire’s friend brought were like a mini-version of some big chicken leg one of the Kings would feast on … like at a feast or at the Red Wedding. Did you see that by the way?! I mean, whoa. The whole Stark—
Doug! No spoilers.
SERVES 6¼ cup cheddar cheese powder or 1 packet cheese powder from packaged mac and cheese
1 tablespoon nutritional yeast
1 teaspoon onion powder
Scant ¼ teaspoon chipotle powder
¼ cup plus 2 tablespoons vegetable oil
⅔ cup popping corn
4 tablespoons unsalted butter, melted
Kosher salt
1 In a small bowl, combine the cheddar powder, nutritional yeast, onion powder, and chipotle powder.
2 In a large pot, heat the oil. Add the popping corn, cover (leaving the lid slightly ajar to allow steam to vent), and pop over medium heat, shaking the pan until the popping slows to 2-second intervals. Immediately turn the popped corn out into a large bowl and drizzle with the butter.
3 Add half the seasoning mixture and toss. Add the remaining mixture and toss again. Season with salt if desired.
Make ahead: The seasoning mixture can be refrigerated for up to 2 months.
CLAIRE’S CO-WORKER’S SICHUAN CHICKEN WINGS
TOTAL 1¼ HOURS Serves 4 to 62 tablespoons ground cumin
1½ teaspoons crushed red pepper flakes
½ teaspoon Chinese 5-spice powder
2 teaspoons kosher salt
¼ cup all-purpose flour
8 large chicken wings (about 3 pounds), split into wingettes and drumettes
1½ tablespoons canola oil, plus more for brushing
Sliced scallions, for garnish
Fresh cilantro leaves, for garnish
2 tablespoons soy sauce
½ cup apricot preserves
1½ teaspoons minced fresh, peeled ginger
1 Preheat the oven to 425°F and line a large rimmed baking sheet with parchment paper.
2 In a large bowl, combine the cumin, red pepper flakes, 5-spice powder, salt, and flour.
3 On a work surface, coat the chicken with the 1½ tablespoons of oil, rubbing to coat completely. Add the chicken to the spice-and-flour blend and toss to coat completely. Arrange the chicken on the baking sheet and brush lightly with oil.
4 Roast in the center of the oven until deeply browned and crispy, turning once or twice, about 50 minutes. Blot on paper towels to remove the excess fat.
5 Meanwhile, make the Duck-Like Sauce: In a food processor, combine the soy sauce, apricot preserves, and ginger with ¼ cup of water and puree until smooth. Transfer to a small saucepan and simmer on low heat until reduced to about ½ cup, 5 to 6 minutes. Pour the sauce into a small dipping bowl.
6 Arrange the wings on a platter, garnish with the scallions and cilantro, and serve with the sauce.
Make ahead: The sauce can be refrigerated for up to 1 month.
Dear Movie Theater Workers,
As you know we are implementing a new Artisanal Menu at our theatrical concession stands at this theater and at our Beaverton location. We’re just trying it out and hoping it goes well at these two locations before implementing this menu at our other two locations. Not certain it will stick forever, but just giving it a shot. We’ll see how this goes.
Please adhere to the following substitutions and instructions to enhance the artisan concession aspect of the moviegoing experience. There will be supplies in the cupboards. Please follow instructions carefully, and don’t forget to remind people about what we’re doing here.
Note: Understanding that we’ve always been attentive to cleanliness, we actually want to keep it kind of messy now that we’re going Artisan. Not, like, gross messy. Just borderline sloppy to remind people that it’s handmade.
No longer use those white-and-red boxes. Instead, roll up a cone of newspaper. (We are using Bridgetown Weekly because they’re free and they always drop off a ton of them in the lobby.)
Ask people (with kind of a wary tone) if they want butter. If so, tell them we temporarily do not have butter because we are working on sourcing it from a qualified local dairy farm. But then reassure them that, as flavoring, we have a new line of artisanal salts from that Salt Store on Mississippi, including: Sea Salt and Truffle Salt.
Note: If they go for truffle salt, please just put a little on there because it is expensive. Actually, don’t even offer truffle salt to every single person. Just the people who seem unhappy about the no-butter thing.
We now only have Coca-Cola, and it is the authentic glass-bottle kind!
Patrons may not bring glass into the theater. It’s always been the policy, and unfortunately we can’t change it. So someone should stand by the theater door and request that patrons finish their glass-bottle Coca-Colas before entering.
Candy-wise, we will be selling pretty much the same old stuff. Just please take all wrapping off of candy bars, licorice, etc., before serving. You can just hand it to them. Apparently that’s what candymen used to do at old-tyme sweet shoppes.
AS A REMINDER, MOVING FORWARD, REFER TO THE “THEATER” AS “THE CINEMA” AND MOVIES AS “FILMS.”
Spyke
APPETIZER DISGUISED AS DESSERT
Hey guys, it’s Spyke. This is a little something from the menu of the Thai restaurant that I cook and report for now. Is it a summer roll, a classic Thai appetizer? Or is it a dessert? Is it a summer roll disguised as a dessert? Or it could be a dessert disguised as a summer roll. Why don’t you just try it yourself and make up your own mind.… You’re going to eat it and scratch your head and be like: I’m a customer. Is this rolled-up thing I’m eating really bad or is it the best thing I’ve ever tasted? The point is: no one really knows. It’s kind of a test, with a message like: have your own opinion! That’s the founding principle of our restaurant. We just make the food. It’s up to you to decide the rest. For yourself.
MAKES 8 SUMMER ROLLS½ cup passion fruit puree or juice
2 tablespoons freshly squeezed orange juice
3 tablespoons sugar (or more to taste)
½ teaspoon cornstarch dissolved in 1 tablespoon water
1 tablespoon chopped fresh mint
1 large ripe mango, halved, peeled, and cut lengthwise into ⅓-inch-thick slices
¼ large ripe pineapple, peeled, cored, and cut into 8 (4 × ½-inch) spears
1 large, firm but ripe banana, peeled and halved lengthwise
Sugar, for sprinkling the fruit
2 ¾-inch-thick slices of pound cake (about 6 ounces)
1 tablespoon unsalted butter, softened
8 large (7- to 8-inch) round rice paper wrappers
16 large fresh mint leaves
Chopped peanuts, for garnish
1 In a small saucepan, combine the passion fruit with the orange juice, the 3 tablespoons of sugar, and the cornstarch dissolved in the water. Whisk until smooth. Bring to a boil, then simmer until slightly thickened, about 30 seconds. Transfer to a bowl and refrigerate until chilled or overnight. Stir in the chopped mint.
2 Preheat a grill pan and lightly oil the grates. Sprinkle the mango, pineapple, and banana with sugar. Spread the pound cake with the butter and set aside.
3 Grill the fruit over high heat, turning once, until lightly charred, about 1 minute for the bananas and 3 to 4 minutes for the mango and pineapple. Transfer to a plate and let cool.
4 Grill the pound cake until toasted on both sides, about 4 minutes.
5 Cut each banana half in half crosswise and half again lengthwise so you have 8 spears. Cut the pound cake into ¾-inch sticks.
6 Fill a skillet with warm water. Working with 1 rice paper wrapper at a time, dip the wrapper into the warm water, then transfer it to a work surface and blot it dry with paper towels. Let it sit for about 30 seconds to 1 minute until pliable. Arrange 2 mint leaves on the lower third of the wrapper and top with a piece of pineapple, mango, banana, and pound cake. Roll up into a tight cylinder, tucking in the sides as you roll up. Repeat with the remaining wrappers and filling.
7 Cut each roll in half and arrange on a platter. Sprinkle with the chopped peanuts and serve with the dipping sauce.
Make ahead: You can make the dipping sauce the day before you make the summer rolls.
BRYCE: Okay, so what you do is you take something and pickle it.
LISA: First you make the brine.
BRYCE: No one knows this, but pickling brine is delicious on its own. Just as a drink! Here, try it!
LISA: I’d rather just eat something pickled, thanks. Anything other than just straight brine.
BRYCE: They call it a “pickleback”!
LISA: Instead let’s pickle … hmm, what do we have around here … an egg?
BRYCE: Pickled eggs. You just, wow … you described––like, actually my dream food. Anyway, see you tomorrow. I’m going to go take a sleeping pill and try really hard to dream about eating a pickled egg.
LISA: Or we could just pickle this egg.
BRYCE: Let’s pickle that. Right away.
LISA: It’s pickled.
BRYCE: And there are so many other things out there you can go ahead and pickle at home!
LISA: Carrots! Okra! Beets! Broccoli!
BRYCE: Shoes!
LISA: You’re going to be great at pickling. You’ve got this! You can pickle this! We know you can pickle this …
BRYCE: Just pick something and go ahead and pickle it. We’re rooting for you.
BRYCE AND LISA: Pickle it!
TOTAL: 20 MINUTES PLUS OVERNIGHT MAKES 2 QUARTS1½ pounds Kirby cucumbers, ends scrubbed
3 tablespoons kosher salt
2 tablespoons sugar
1¼ cups distilled white vinegar (5% acidity)
2 tablespoons whole coriander seeds
1 teaspoon whole black peppercorns
1 teaspoon allspice berries
2 cups water, plus more if necessary
4 to 6 long red or green hot chiles, halved lengthwise
6 large garlic cloves, halved
1 Pack the cucumbers into 2 quart-size jars.
2 In another quart-size jar, combine the salt, sugar, vinegar, coriander seeds, peppercorns, and allspice berries.
3 Close the lid and shake until the salt and sugar are dissolved.
4 Add the 2 cups of water and pour the brine over the pickles.
5 Tuck the chiles and garlic between the cucumbers.
6 Add enough water just to cover the pickles and keep them submerged. Cover and refrigerate overnight.
7 Can be stored in fridge for up to 2 months.
CUCUMBERS
12 ounces Kirby or Persian minis per quart-size jar. Wash and dry well, then trim the ends and pack into the jar.
CARROTS
12 ounces baby carrots per quart-size jar. Scrub, then blanch in boiling water for 2 minutes. Drain and cool under running water. Pack into the jar.
OKRA
12 ounces per quart-size jar. Wash and dry well and trim the stem end slightly, leaving the cap on. Pack into the jar.
ONIONS AND BEETS
6 ounces each cooked baby beets and peeled pearl onions per quart-size jar. Pack into the jar.
12 ounces per quart-size jar. Peel stems and cut into sticks. Pack into the jar.
BORSCHT WITH PICKLES, EGGS, AND HORSERADISH CREAM
Marco
911 BEETS
Marco here. If you have an emergency, dial 911. If you’re eating beets and you think you are dealing with an emergency, we have a new number we would ask you to call. Ready?
For beets: 111
Please pay special attention to borscht, the most regularly reported case of beet-related trauma. Always remember: “Borscht IS Beets.” We encourage you to remember this via the following acronym: B.I.B.
Now take a deep breath and calmly enjoy your borscht.
Thank you.
SERVES 41 tablespoon vegetable oil
1 small onion, minced (about ¼ cup)
1 cup coarsely shredded beets (suggest using a julienne peeler)
1 cup coarsely shredded carrots
Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper
2 tablespoons red wine vinegar
1½ cups fresh beet juice (if using freshly juiced beets, scoop off any foam)
2 large eggs
4 fingerling potatoes
1 tablespoon prepared horseradish
¼ cup sour cream
8 cornichons, thinly sliced, for garnish
Dill sprigs, for garnish
1 In a medium saucepan, heat the oil. Cook the onion over medium heat, stirring, until softened, about 3 minutes. Add the beets and cook, stirring frequently, until just softened, about 3 minutes. Add the carrots, season with salt and pepper to taste, and cook until just softened, 3 minutes. Add the vinegar and cook until evaporated.
2 Add the beet juice and transfer to a medium bowl. Refrigerate the borscht until chilled.
3 In a small saucepan, cover the eggs with cold water and bring to a vigorous boil. Cover and let sit off the heat for 12 minutes. Drain and shake the pan to crack the eggs lightly. Add ice water to cool. Peel and chop the eggs.
4 Meanwhile, fill the saucepan with water and bring to a boil. Add the potatoes and boil until they are tender, about 10 minutes. Drain, cool completely, and cut into coins.
5 In a small bowl, combine the horseradish and sour cream. Serve the borscht in small bowls and garnish with the horseradish cream, chopped eggs, potatoes, cornichons, and dill.
On behalf of the collective of farmers and families whose labors and love have resulted in this hand-delivered cardboard box of beautiful produce, we would like to say: greetings! And thank you for skipping the grocery store and supporting local Portland agriculture by ordering these vegetables directly to your home.
Allow us to walk you through the contents of this box so you know what you’re dealing with here … and where it comes from (… here!). As usual, we are enclosing our weekly recipe suggestions! But feel free to use this beautiful produce however you see fit. The recipe suggestions are just a fun thing we do now. How you feel like preparing these beautiful vegetables is up to you. (Not us!) ;)
The beautiful corn contained in this box comes from Harvey Baker’s farm. Harvey wanted to let you all know that you’re all welcome to swing by his farm. Just let Harvey know first. Call him like a day ahead of time, please. No big groups. And keep your voice down around the gray horse if you decide to come by. Thank you, and enjoy the fresh corn!
It’s turnip time! Turnip the volume, everybody. Time to celebrate the turnip with a celebratory snack. These beautiful turnips are from Lane Potter’s turnip patch. She is the proud keeper of Oregon’s only turnip patch, Potter’s Turnip Patch, dedicated strictly to turnips. It’s the only turnip-only patch in Oregon, so she knows what she’s doing here, guys. You’ll agree when you taste the turnips from this patch of hers. Enjoy your turnips!
The carrots are the prize item in this week’s CSA box. (Shh! Don’t tell the corn, turnip, or beet guys.) But it’s true. Carrots have never been crunchier or as naturally orange. The dirt on them is intentionally left there by the farmers. It’s not that they are lazy or that the farms are too understaffed to have appointed carrot-cleaners. We have guys who could theoretically do that. No, we left the dirt there because it is a nice way of reminding you that these beautiful carrots were dug up from the ground by some local guys who affectionately placed them in this box. If you have kids at home, it is nice to show them the dirt on the carrots so they learn that carrots come from the ground, not the grocery store.
Pay attention to the beets in this box. Do not forget that you ate them. If they’re missing all of a sudden, ask yourself: Did I eat those beets at some point? You want to keep track. If you experience any unusual body-stuff, remind yourself: it might be beets. Then calmly think if you ate beets. Then remember that you did and safely go on with your day. A message from 111, Portland’s Local Beets Beat.
Thank you for supporting Community Supported Agriculture, Brendan and Michelle! Have a beautiful week. And see you next week. It’s supposed to be a sunny week.
Sincerely,
Your CSA Family and Friends
TOTAL: 1½ HOURS SERVES 6½ cup walnut halves
8 baby beets (about 1½ to 2 inches), preferably golden or chioggia, scrubbed
8 baby turnips, trimmed
1 bunch fresh baby carrots, scrubbed
4 unpeeled garlic cloves
4 sprigs of fresh thyme
¼ cup water
¼ cup plus 2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper
¼ cup mayonnaise
2 tablespoons whole or low-fat plain Greek yogurt or sour cream
1 tablespoon distilled white vinegar
¼ cup buttermilk
8 ounces mixed greens, such as mesclun, baby arugula, and watercress (thick stems discarded)
1 Preheat the oven to 350°F.
2 Spread the walnuts out on a pie plate and toast until golden and fragrant, about 10 minutes. Let cool. Finely chop the walnuts.
3 Meanwhile, in a large baking dish, arrange the beets in one third, the turnips in another third, and the carrots in the last third. Scatter the garlic and thyme all around and drizzle with the water and 2 tablespoons of the oil. Season with salt and pepper to taste.
4 Cover with foil and roast until tender, about 45 minutes. Remove the foil and roast until the liquid is mostly evaporated, about 10 minutes longer.
5 Let cool, then peel the beets and cut them into halves (quarters if large). Cut the turnips into halves (quarters if large) and the carrots in half (lengthwise if large).
6 Squeeze the garlic cloves from their skins into a small bowl and mash to a paste. Whisk in the mayonnaise, yogurt, and vinegar until smooth. Whisk in the buttermilk, followed by the remaining ¼ cup of oil. Season with ½ teaspoon each salt and pepper. Fold in half of the walnuts.
7 In a bowl, toss the greens with the roasted vegetables and ⅓ cup of the dressing and arrange on a platter. Garnish with the remaining walnuts and serve the remaining dressing on the side.
TOTAL: 40 MINUTES SERVES 61 large jalapeño
1 ear of corn, husked
¼ cup canola oil, plus more for brushing
2 tablespoons freshly squeezed lime juice
1 scallion, whites and greens, thinly sliced separately
2 tablespoons chopped fresh cilantro, plus leaves for garnish
Kosher salt
12 ounces mixed heirloom tomatoes, cut into slices, halves, and quarters for variety
2 ounces sugar snap peas, thinly sliced on the bias
1 Brush the jalapeño and corn lightly with oil and roast over a gas flame, turning frequently until browned all over, about 5 minutes. Let cool, then peel, seed, and chop the jalapeño and remove the kernels from the cob.
2 In a mini food processor, combine the lime juice with the ¼ cup of oil and process until combined. Add the jalapeño, scallion whites, and half of the corn and pulse to a chunky dressing. Add the chopped cilantro and pulse to combine. Season with salt to taste.
3 In a large bowl, toss the tomatoes, snap peas, scallion greens, and remaining roasted corn with some of the dressing and arrange on plates. Drizzle the remaining dressing on top and garnish with cilantro leaves. Serve right away.
