I am a healthy eater, or at least I like to think I am. Now that I’ve hit my midthirties and am heading irreversibly toward my forties, I can’t get away with all the carbs and refined sugars I used to eat. I want to be healthy, and I want my wife to think I’m sexy. Those are my main motivations for nutritional eating.
But that’s not easy—and probably not for the reasons you would think. You might expect me to say that I love donuts or burgers or milkshakes. That I find creative ways to justify not exercising. That I like to sleep in and skip breakfast. That I tend to eat too late at night. That I drink too many of my calories.
And . . . you might be right on a few of those. But they aren’t the real reason it’s hard to eat healthy.
The real reason is that I don’t know what’s healthy. I am so confused and lost about what is good for me. I am overwhelmed by the minutia and the blogs and the books and the opinions. Even my nearest and dearest friends can’t agree.
For instance, I am a child of the eighties, so a nutritional breakfast growing up included things like Kellogg’s Frosted Mini-Wheats. This particular cereal had wheat in the name, so it had to be healthy. That was the reasoning.
If it wasn’t Mini-Wheats, it was Raisin Bran. Again, the term bran automatically gave my mom the assurance she needed that we were eating healthy. Plus it contained raisins, which were descendants of actual fruit, so we knew our breakfast was nutritious.
If it had wheat or bran in the name, we sliced bananas on it and ate it. That was the breakfast philosophy of 1988. We thought it was healthy, so we were happy.
Imagine my shock when, years later, I was informed that Raisin Bran actually has far more sugar in it than those “unhealthy” cereals that we demonize, like Fruit Loops or Frosted Flakes. Turns out those two scoops of former fruit are absolutely caked in refined sugar. Like eighteen grams of it. So now I won’t touch the stuff. And I would rather eat the cardboard box of Frosted Mini-Wheats than the cereal inside.
Back in the eighties we avoided butter and bacon because they were fattening. But times have changed. Now I put butter in my coffee and I crush bacon for every meal, because I am bulletproof. That is the newest diet craze. Ironically I used to warn people about bacon. Why? Because pigs don’t sweat. Let that sink in for a second. We are eating all their toxins. But now suddenly it’s good fat, so we are all about avocados and bacon and butter, and we feel so good about ourselves.
But of course, the World Health Organization recently released a study that appeared to link bacon to an increased risk of certain cancers.1 That sparked an entire controversy about the nature and level of risk, and people started hashtagging their breakfast photos #bacongate and #freebacon because anyone with taste buds prefers the version of reality that says bacon is healthy.
I am officially 100 percent confused.
Do you remember in the eighties how a candy bar and a milkshake were treats you only got on Saturdays? Now they are meal replacements. They are packed with the perfect proportion of minerals and nutrients and vitamins and calories and good fats and everything else we are supposed to need. So we are all living on shakes and bars because we are high-powered healthy professionals who don’t have time for a meal.
Let’s be honest: If we are replacing meals, we are leaving out a lot more than food. Many of the best moments of life revolve around friends and food. On what planet is meal replacement a healthier way to live?
I could go on. How about bananas? The other day I was eating a banana, and one of my friends said, “Wow, are you actually eating a banana?” His tone was a mixture of disdain and concern, which confused me.
“Well, yes. I was hungry, and bananas are healthy.”
“You might as well have a can of soda.”
I was like, “Excuse me? I didn’t know bananas were carbonated and filled with corn syrup.”
He said, “Your body processes a banana the same way as a can of Coke. You’re killing yourself, buddy.”
Or what about kale? Kale didn’t even exist in 1988. Someone made it up, and that person has made a lot of money on it too.
If we are confused about what is healthy for our bodies, how much more confused are we about what is healthy for our souls? It’s relatively easy to measure and analyze the outside us. But what about the inside us? How do we know if we are healthy? How do we become healthy? How do we stay healthy?
In the previous chapter, we looked at God’s original design for our souls and concluded that our souls can be healthy only when they are at home in God; that is, when they return to God, when they find their purpose in God, and when they return to relationship with God. We used the word worship to refer to that place of intimacy and closeness to our Creator.
In the next few chapters, I want to dive a little deeper into how we can be healthy on the inside. We will be looking at a number of needs and facets of the human soul.
The good news is that this is actually less confusing and subjective than all the banana, bacon, and breakfast cereal debates, because we aren’t on our own in this process. We don’t have to sort through books and blogs and opinions. The Creator himself has given us a handbook for a healthy soul: the Bible.
As we get started, I want to take a look at the original environment of the human soul. In other words, what is the atmosphere that is most helpful for the human soul? What was the setting and context that God originally designed for us?
We are creatures of our environment, after all. Whether we are working, relaxing, or romancing, environment matters. Setting and ambience and mood lighting and the proper sound track make all the difference.
In the beginning, God set humanity in an environment conducive to internal success. When we look at what the Bible says about the conditions God originally created for the human soul, we discover a blueprint and a plan to achieve soul health. I want to look at what I think are the four essential elements of that environment. You can still exist without them, of course—many people do—but they are essential if we are going to get the most out of life.
Remember, God is the designer, the architect, and the originator of this complicated entity called the human soul. When he created the soul, he placed it in an optimal environment, in a place where it could thrive. Why? Because God wants us to thrive in life. He didn’t create us to barely make it or merely survive. He wants to help us have healthy souls and full lives. If we can implement these elements in our everyday lives, I believe we will be healthy to our cores. Even when our outside environments aren’t particularly healthy or stable, if we are healthy on the inside, we will conquer adversity.
Before we look at the four elements of a healthy soul environment, I should mention that these things were part of God’s original creation for humankind, and this creation did not include the presence of evil. When God designed the soul, evil did not exist; death did not exist; selfishness did not exist. Humanity enjoyed a sinless, flawless environment.
That is not true anymore, in case you haven’t noticed. Babies do not spring from the womb thinking, I want to love and share and give. Quite the opposite. If you have kids and they are anything like mine, their first few words included terms like no, mine, gimme, and now. Often in that order and at a deafening decibel level to boot.
Everywhere we look we see the effects of evil. Wars, genocide, racism, terrorism, greed, destruction—while governments and military forces in every nation try to limit evil, they can’t eradicate it, because it springs from within us.
Sorry to sound so negative. But it’s essential that we understand that sin was not part of God’s creation. Why? Because if we try to apply these four elements to our souls without dealing with the sin issue, it won’t work. They will be lifeless and empty because, as we saw before, the most important thing we can do for a healthy soul is to come into a relationship with God.
How is that possible? How can we who were born on a hurting planet, a planet suffering under the influence and pull of evil, be restored to the purity that God originally created?
It is clear throughout human history that we cannot solve the sin problem on our own. We cannot become good again through self-effort; we cannot achieve right standing with God based on our performance.
That is why God sent his Son, Jesus. The Bible says that “God put the wrong on him who never did anything wrong, so we could be put right with God” (2 Corinthians 5:21 THE MESSAGE).
As we relate to God from a place of forgiveness and acceptance through Jesus, we can apply these four elements to our lives. We can surround ourselves with this kind of environment, and we will experience the health and happiness that God gives our souls.
We see the first element of a healthy soul environment in Genesis 2:7–9.
Verse 7 describes the creation of humanity this way: “Then the LORD God formed the man of dust from the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living creature.” We looked at this verse in the previous chapter, and we saw that when God breathed his soul-breath into Adam’s lifeless body, Adam became a living soul.
Then, starting with verse 8, there is a description of the optimum, soul-nurturing environment that God created for mankind. It just might surprise you.
And the LORD God planted a garden in Eden, in the east, and there he put the man whom he had formed. And out of the ground the LORD God made to spring up every tree that is pleasant to the sight and good for food. (verses 8–9)
Remember, this is the most ideal environment God could have designed. It was the original home for the human soul, a place where our souls, spirits, and hearts would thrive.
It’s not nearly as spiritual as you might think. I would have expected angels singing softly in the treetops, or worship music playing in the background, or engravings of Bible verses posted on trees, or at least a statue of God somewhere.
But the first thing God wants us to know about the original environment is that the trees were beautiful and they had delicious fruit.
Excuse me, God?
Consider what God is saying here. It seems so arbitrary—but it’s not. He’s sending us a message about what our souls need.
Our souls need rest. They need relaxation, enjoyment, peace, and pleasure.
If we polled people and asked them what they thought religion and a relationship with God was all about, what do you think they would say? I think many would answer, “It’s about rules. About morals. About keeping the Ten Commandments. About behaving and being good.” And if they were honest, I think many would continue, “Actually, I should probably go back to church. I feel bad. I feel guilty. My life’s not right. I think God is mad at me.”
Here’s what I don’t think a lot of people would say: “Relationship with God? It’s about enjoying God. It’s about enjoying life, nature, good food, and friends. It’s about rest. Rest is what God wants for my life.”
Yet God gives us a picture of rest by saying, “Enjoy the sights and the tastes. I want you to love it. It’s free. It’s for you. I designed life to be enjoyable.”
In our fixation with keeping rules and appeasing a God we secretly suspect might be angry or disappointed, we are in danger of losing one of the fundamental keys to a healthy soul: that of rest, of enjoying who God is and what he has created for us. God wants to remind us how imperative rest and enjoyment are for our souls, so the first description we get of the garden is that the foliage is fun to look at and the food tastes amazing.
Why is rest first? Rest is first because God is first. A restless soul is a soul that thinks it is in control and needs to take care of everything. If we do not rest, we are trying to be our own God. We have to remember that even when we rest, God does not. When we sleep, God does not. And when we cease working, God does not.
I think God was communicating to Adam, “You know that none of this was because of you, right? I created all of this on my own and I gave it to you, so don’t take yourself too seriously there, slugger. Okay? This is something I did. I made you too. So you are not God. It’s not all on you. I love you, and I made you just for me. So how about you enjoy the trees, eat some fruit, and relax a little bit. You’re not that big of a deal, just FYI.”
It’s amazing how big of a deal we become in our own minds sometimes. It leads to so much anxiety and fear.
Do you know where worry comes from? From thinking we are in control. True rest is unattainable for people who are obsessed with leading their own lives. But rest is one of the primary postures of those who know Jesus, because we have a God who is in control and who is taking care of us.
Psalm 127:1–2 describes how useless it is to overburden ourselves with the cares and concerns of life:
Unless the LORD builds the house,
those who build it labor in vain.
Unless the LORD watches over the city,
the watchman stays awake in vain.
It is in vain that you rise up early
and go late to rest,
eating the bread of anxious toil;
for he gives to his beloved sleep.
This is so applicable to modern culture. He is saying, “It’s pointless for you to work late into the night. To skip sleep, to wake up early in the morning and start working again, as if you were in control and you were the only provider and protector for your life.”
Where is the margin in that? Where is the rest? Where are the awareness and acknowledgment of your Creator and your Designer who is sovereign over life’s unpredictability?
The songwriter says, “You can’t even enjoy the bread in your mouth because you are so worried you won’t have enough money to buy another loaf tomorrow.” He might as well be talking about those meal replacement bars. Some people can never enjoy a good meal with good friends because they are so important and so busy.
Somehow I don’t think that’s what God had in mind for the human soul when he created the garden of Eden. The original home of the soul had great-looking trees and awesome food—that gives us a little bit of perspective, doesn’t it? Maybe what we are here for is not to be so important, successful, awesome, and busy that we don’t even have time to eat. Let’s enjoy God and enjoy his creation.
One of the most spiritual things you can do today might be to cancel your fast-paced, anxious preparation for your big meeting tomorrow. Make a new friend or look up some old friends and go get some good food. Take time to laugh about life and consider the goodness of God.
Maybe you are worried or fearful about something, and you think, I need to fast and pray. That might be a great thing to do. There is a time and place for that. But sometimes even spiritual activity can be a subconscious attempt to make things happen. Sometimes the best option is to share a meal with a friend who’s gone through something similar. Let him or her process with you, cry with you, and laugh with you. Don’t get too overwhelmed. Lean into God and trust that he really is looking out for you.
Jesus said, “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls” (Matthew 11:28–29). He couldn’t have been any clearer. Our souls need rest, and he is our ultimate source of rest.
“He gives to his beloved sleep,” Psalm 127:2 says. I have to be honest: that is one of my favorite verses in the Bible.
Sometimes God just wants you to go to bed. When is the last time you heard a preacher say that? Sometimes the most spiritual, godly, and God-aware thing you can do is take a nap. Realize you probably won’t figure it all out or get it all done, but God is with you and God is for you.
The second element of a healthy soul environment is found in Genesis 2:15. “The LORD God took the man and put him in the garden of Eden to work it and keep it.” In other words, God gave the human soul responsibility.
This could be shocking to some people, because they assume that work was the result of sin. They think that God gave Adam a job as punishment because he messed up. “Adam, clearly you have too much time on your hands, and that’s why you are running around getting into trouble. So guess what. I just invented something called work. You’ll hate it, you’ll resent it, but you’re stuck with it.”
That’s the attitude the American culture often seems to take. Some of us think, I will get a job because I need to have a job, but I’m going to work the job as hard as I can so that someday I can quit that job.
Why? Because we think a responsibility-free environment will make us happier. We assume that since work is hard but vacation is fun, work itself is the problem. Responsibility is an intruder. Jobs are the enemy. We work hard so that someday we can retire and start to do what we actually enjoy.
Yet the second element in the Bible’s description of this original, sin-free environment is that God had an assignment for Adam. He had a job. The difference is that before the intrusion of sin, there was no anxiety, toil, or sweat in that job. But Adam still had something he was required to do. God created humans to bear responsibility.
The Hebrew word translated work here can also be rendered serve.2 Often when we think about serving, we think in terms of sacrifice, but serving actually benefits the servant the most. Serving makes your soul feel good. It makes you feel alive on the inside. Your soul finds fulfillment, health, and life when you live beyond yourself.
Responsibility is good for the soul. I sound like my dad right now, but it’s true. Sometimes we equate a lack of responsibility with living free, but that’s not freedom. That’s not how our souls operate. We need assignments, we need work, and we need activity.
Some people want responsibility, but they only want the task they want. And if they don’t get the job or role or assignment they want, then they don’t take it to heart. They think, When I get that dream job, I will care enough to really give myself to it; but right now, I don’t really care. I hate my job, so I’ll do the least possible amount of work to get my paycheck.
The Bible says, “Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might” (Ecclesiastes 9:10 NIV). Have you ever stopped to think that maybe responsibility is a key to fulfillment and joy on the inside? Maybe soul satisfaction is tied more to responsibility itself than to a particular role or a dream job.
I started working at the City Church as a custodian. It wasn’t my preference, but I wanted to work at the church, and one day a custodial position opened up. So I took it.
I’m sure I was not the best custodian. I definitely missed some stuff. And I will never clean another women’s bathroom, because I’m scarred for life. But that’s beside the point. I will say, though, that I think I had the most fun of any custodian ever in my church. No matter who was working with me, we always had a blast. We laughed the whole time. And it sounds crazy, but I found so much fulfillment in that job.
What’s even crazier is this: now I’m in charge of the whole church, but it hasn’t made me any happier. Being the lead pastor as opposed to a custodian has not increased my joy level one bit. I was happy before and I’m happy now. I was tempted to be worried and fearful and insecure before, and I face the same temptations now. The things that people would call success have not given me more joy, peace, or security on the inside.
What has given me joy, whether I’m the custodian or the lead pastor, is that I do it with all my heart. The joy is not in the role. The joy is in the responsibility.
I am responsible for this job, I decided. This is my world. These are my bathrooms to clean. This is my lobby to vacuum. I’m going to do this, and I’m going to sing and rap the whole time, and I’m going to write sermons in my head, and I’m going to have an awesome time.
Don’t wait for a certain role to come along. Your soul’s happiness and health are not dependent upon a role. Your soul was designed to do whatever you do with everything within it. It needs responsibility to be healthy, and there is a good chance that responsibility is right in front of you.
The next element of an environment that helps our souls to thrive appears in Genesis 2:16–17 (NIV).
And the LORD God commanded the man, “You are free to eat from any tree in the garden; but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat from it you will certainly die.”
It’s indicative of God’s grace that he gave permission before restriction. He said, “You can eat from every tree except one.” How many trees were there? Hundreds? Thousands? Adam and Eve could eat from all of them except one: the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.
Think about that. The odds were stacked in their favor. God wasn’t trying to trap them. He didn’t give them impossible commands and then laugh when they failed. He made it as simple and straightforward as possible. He set them up for success.
He gave them the world, but he gave them limits too.
At this point, a lot of people say, “It’s God’s fault. If God would not have put that one little bad tree in the garden, we wouldn’t be in this predicament today. Why didn’t he leave that tree out?”
First, without that tree, we lose our definition of love. Love requires free will. If there is no choice in love, then it isn’t love. Forced love is how you end up in jail. God is love, and he created us to be loved and to love. But we had to have the power of choice to respond to him. There had to be real options, a real opportunity to choose or reject God, or it wouldn’t be love and it wouldn’t be free will.
I want to focus, however, on another reason I believe this tree was placed in the garden. It is the third element of a healthy environment: restraint. Restriction and restraint are necessary for a healthy soul.
I really sound like my parents now. Maybe that’s because I’ve been a parent for twelve years and counting. Often I find myself saying no to my kids simply because no is what is needed. I might have the means to meet their request. I might even have the desire to meet it. But I say no because that is what my son or daughter needs in the moment.
Sometimes there is a clear reason why I have to say no. Other times there isn’t, but somehow I still know the answer needs to be no. They need the limits; they need the restraints and constraints.
A child who never hears no becomes “that kid.” We all know “that kid.” Likewise, if we don’t have limits we can become “that man” or “that woman.” A soul without restraints is an unhealthy soul, and the results are obvious to those around us.
I believe God put the tree of the knowledge of good and evil there because when Adam and Eve walked by, the limitation was good for their souls. Their souls felt protected and secure. Their souls felt directed and guarded because they had the ability to say, “I can, but I won’t; and that’s good for me.”
Growing up, my parents held the “no card” for my sister and me. Now I hold it for my kids. Guess what maturity is all about? Guess what parenting is all about? Leading our kids to a place where they can say no for themselves, even when they want to say yes.
That’s the challenge: self-imposed restraint. That is maturity in a nutshell. It’s when you have the money, you have the desire, you have the opportunity, and yet you still say, “Nope.”
Why? Because sometimes you need to hear yourself tell yourself no. That was good for me, your soul will say. Don’t underestimate how significant a no is for the health of your soul.
Maria Montessori was an Italian educator whose educational system and philosophy greatly affected US education. Her educational process was predicated upon the belief that children were in their optimal educational environment when they had freedom within limits.3
Freedom within limits. That would be the garden of Eden. That is where the soul is at its best.
God designed restrictions and limitations as a blessing for your soul. You and I are not God. We need constraints and restraints. We need checks and balances.
God knows that, of course, and he built restraints into the form and function of every facet of life. Contrary to popular belief, not all rules are made to be broken and not all limits are meant to be tested. We need to grow in maturity until we can distinguish what restraints are healthy and submit ourselves to those restraints.
These first three elements—rest, responsibility, and restraint—fall flat if we miss the last element: relationship.
Genesis 1, the first chapter of the Bible, recounts the six days of creation. Sun, moon, stars, earth, plants, animals, man—everything was incredible. God looked at his work after each stage of creation, and he saw that it was good (verses 10, 12, 18, 21, 25). When he finished, the Bible says he looked over all creation and “it was very good” (verse 31). In fact, it was so good that God decided to take the seventh day off. Not because he was tired, but because he was finished.
But there was one thing in that perfect, sinless, universe that was not good. “The LORD God said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him’ ” (Genesis 2:18 NIV).
In other words, even though Adam’s soul was perfect, it was not healthy for it to be alone. Not only that, but God personally was going to provide companionship and relationship.
We are, by nature, relational beings. We were meant for community. Even the most introverted, solitary personality types need at least some level of human interaction in order to maintain healthy, thriving, vibrant souls. It is unhealthy for our souls to be isolated or without relationship.
This is imperative. Yes, we need rest, we need responsibility, and we need restraint. But more than anything, we need relationship. That’s why God himself called an intervention.
God proceeded to create woman, and Adam and Eve became the first married couple and ultimately the parents and progenitors of the entire human race.
Marriage continues to be the single most important human relationship, but I think this passage speaks of more than just marriage. Marriage, in essence, is friendship. Without friendship it is next to impossible to make marriage work.
Let’s consider Genesis 2:18 in friendship terms. Look at how involved God is in making a friend for Adam. Does God care about my friends? you might wonder. He most definitely does. Just look at this story.
God says, “I will make a helper suitable for him.” A healthy friend could be defined as “a helper who fits.”
So here are my questions and my appeal to you as we talk about a healthy soul.
Are you intentional about your friends?
Are they helping you?
Do you fit together?
Yes, I think we should live big. We should draw big circles, be inclusive, be forgiving, and be kind—but we can’t be intimate friends with all seven billion people on this planet. We can’t be close friends with a few thousand people. Probably not even a few hundred people.
Realistically, we might be close, intimate friends with only a dozen people. Maybe a few more or a few less, depending on our individual capacities and personalities. So we had better choose those people intentionally, carefully, and prayerfully.
Someone once said, “Show me your friends, and I’ll show you your future.” But we could go even further. “Show me your friends, and I will show you the state of your soul.” These are the people who are feeding you on the inside.
Are they giving you life?
Are they serving or only taking?
Are they building you up or tearing you down?
Are they healing your soul or hurting your soul?
By the same token, are you providing for the needs of their souls? A healthy friendship is a two-way street.
Consider carefully the relationships in your life. A lot of people take relationships as they come, with little analysis or long-term thought. “You want to hang out every night? Sure! You want to date me? Sounds good! Sleep together? Hey, why not?”
Friendships and relationships are more important than that. Be careful and be intentional. Let God lead you.
I’m talking about close relationships, of course—the people you are doing life with on a consistent basis. I’m not saying to exclude everyone else, or to never be open to new friends. I’m simply saying that if God went to that kind of effort to provide an appropriate friend and companion for Adam, he will help you too. I believe your relationships can be created, ordained, and put together by the hands of God. Those God-given relationships will create an environment where your soul can thrive.
Maybe as you read this, you are thinking to yourself, I can tell you right now, my soul is not in a healthy place. Proverbs 18:14 says: “A healthy spirit conquers adversity, but what can you do when the spirit is crushed?” (THE MESSAGE).
What can you do when your spirit is crushed? What can you do when the inside you is broken and unhealthy?
Go to the originator and designer of your soul. Go to the one who gave you breath to begin with, and say, “Okay, God, I’m starting over. I’m starting fresh. I want to be healthy to my core. I want to focus on my soul and my heart, not just my physical body or external circumstances.”
God will help you. He’ll give you rest. He’ll guide you into appropriate responsibilities. He’ll surround you with safe restraints. He’ll provide relationships that fit and friends who help you navigate the twists and turns and ups and downs of life.
We might not always know what diet plan to follow for healthy bodies, but we have a guide to healthy souls. And as we intentionally and regularly follow God’s plan, our souls will be free to thrive.