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Marla pushed open the back door, holding a bag of groceries and the mail. She set them down on the kitchen counter and shook off the cold October rain. Her Monday shift at the hospital had been busy and exhausting. She was glad to be home now. Glancing around the dark kitchen, she flipped on the light switch. Charlie wasn’t home yet. He had sent her a text earlier telling her he would be late, but he had said seven-thirty at the latest. Glancing at the microwave clock, she could see that it was eight-thirty.
After putting the groceries away and hanging up her raincoat, she sat down at the kitchen table to sort through the mail. “Bill, bill, bill, advertisement ... what is this?” She held up an envelope from a Stanton and Stanton Law Firm and eyed it for a moment. Fearful of what it might be, she laid it aside.
Marla ascended the stairs to her bedroom. After changing out of her scrubs, she put on her robe, ran the bath, and soaked in the tub for a while. Her back and legs were aching from being on her feet during her shift. She was only thirty-three, but some days after work, she felt much older.
Once in her pajamas, she returned to the bathroom to brush her hair. Just like everything else in the house, the bathroom was tidy and orderly. She glanced at Charlie’s side of the vanity. His towel was perfectly folded, and his shaving kit was neatly placed in its usual spot as if it hadn’t been touched. Marla felt a wave of loneliness sweep through her. Charlie had been so absent lately. She could feel the separation between them growing and didn’t know how to stop it. After brushing her hair, she opened the drawer to replace her hairbrush. Reaching into the drawer, she glanced at Charlie’s shaving kit and saw a piece of paper sticking out of the top. Furrowing her brows, she thought, what is that? Given Charlie’s neat-freak tendencies, she was surprised to see a piece of paper haphazardly sticking out of the top of the kit. She reached for the paper and picked it up. She unfolded it and read, I’ll miss you so much this week. Hurry back to me. Love, Kayla.
Marla’s breath caught in her throat as she felt her heart tumble into her stomach. Kayla? Who’s Kayla? Her thoughts became jumbled as she realized what this meant. This can’t be. All at once, she slammed her fist onto the bathroom counter. She could feel anger and hurt erupt. He’s cheating on me. She had suspected this scenario might exist down in the depths of her soul. But whether she suspected an affair or not, the reality of seeing the proof wrenched her heart. Before she could think another thought, she heard Charlie’s voice behind her.
“What are you doing?” He yelled as she spun around to face him. She hadn’t heard him come in. She could hardly focus or breathe as the words of the love note of betrayal were still clawing her heart out.
“You ... you’re having an affair?” She stammered as she choked out the words holding the paper toward him.
Charlie just stood there, glaring at her. Then he yelled, “Why are you going through my stuff?”
Marla temporarily fell into her learned, defensive mode. “I ... I wasn’t ... it was just sticking out, and I saw it.”
He grabbed the note from her as his voice thundered, “So you just thought you’d read it?”
Confusion set in as she furrowed her eyebrows and shook her head back-and-forth. Then she regrouped as pain and anger gave her resolve. “Wait a minute. You are my husband. I can look at a piece of paper in your shaving kit. Why are you avoiding the real issue? You know, the one that involves you with another woman?”
His face turned red, and he exhaled loudly. “You just don’t get me. You’re always working at the hospital, and when you’re home, you’re too tired for me. I’m sick of being second on your list, and I’m tired of always having to explain my every move.”
“I wouldn’t ask you so many questions if you would just be more open and honest with me,” she replied, feeling pained.
“Well, I guess it doesn’t matter. The cat’s out of the bag. Yeah, I’m having an affair. I’ve found someone who has time and energy for me. She gets me.” He took a deep breath and added, “You were going to find out about it sooner or later anyway. I actually filed for divorce today.”
Marla couldn’t breathe. She felt as if she’d been sucker-punched in the gut. She couldn’t speak, and tears of frustration and pain erupted. All she could get out was, “Why?”
Charlie took a step back and said, “Look, we fell out of love a long time ago. This marriage just isn’t working anymore. I don’t know how you can live like this, but I’m done.”
“You don’t know how I can live like this? I’ll tell you how. Marriage is a commitment, that’s how. I may work a lot at the hospital, but you’re gone two weeks out of the month. I am always staying up waiting for you to come home so we can spend some time together, but you seem to always find time for other things and people. If I’m not available to meet your needs, it’s because you’re not here.”
“Well, no offense, but this marriage is not a marriage, and I’m done trying. I just don’t think I love you anymore,” he replied.
Charlie grabbed his shaving kit and moved into the bedroom. He pulled a suitcase out and began shoving his clothes inside.
His words paralyzed her for a moment as tears spilled onto her cheeks and fell to the floor. She slowly stepped into the bedroom. “What are you doing?” She asked, looking at him through tear-stained, swollen eyes.
“I told you. I’m done. Nothing will change my mind. I’m moving on. I’m sick and tired of answering to you. I can’t believe you would go through my stuff. I mean, what kind of marriage has no trust? This is just no good. I can’t take it anymore.” He picked up his suitcase and said, “I’ve already thought about splitting things up. I’m keeping the house, but you can have any furniture you want. I’ll expect you to be out by the end of the week.” As he walked out of the bedroom, he turned to her with a scowl. “Make sure you leave all of the keys here.”
Marla heard the back-door slam shut. He was gone. Her legs grew weak, and she dropped onto the bed. She felt herself starting to hyperventilate as she tried to grasp what had just happened. Divorce? He doesn’t love me? Why is this happening? How did we get here? How did my life get to this point? She slowed her breathing as the tears free-flowed. “He is not a good man,” she choked out in a whisper. Her thoughts raced as she tried to comprehend how her life was about to change. I can’t believe this. What will I do? Where will I go?
She stood from the bed and walked into the bathroom. Splashing cold water on her face, she stared at herself in the mirror. She couldn’t help but feel shame as she looked at the image staring back at her. What has happened to you? How could you let this happen? This is all your fault. Her father’s words echoed in her mind. Turning away from the mirror, she leaned on the counter. No, this is not my fault. I gave it my all. He cheated. He is leaving this marriage. He has chosen this path for us, not me.
She walked through her bedroom into the hallway and carefully descended the stairs. After aimlessly wandering through the living room, she stopped at the grandfather clock. If only you were still here, she thought, reaching for the clock and wishing for comfort from her grandparents. Bending down on one knee, she slowly ran her fingers over the small etched heart at its base. A tear trickled down her cheek, and she sniffled. After a moment, she stood and turned to survey the room. “None of this is mine,” she said. Then she looked at the grandfather clock again, gently rubbing her hand over its cherry wood finish, “except for you.”
In the kitchen, she retrieved her checkbook from her purse and was thankful that she had been smart enough to open her own checking account when she and Charlie had first married. There was comfort in knowing she had a nest egg of money in savings. But where would she go? The only logical option seemed to be an apartment rental close to work. That thought made her cringe as the picture of a lonely, empty apartment came to her mind. Closing her eyes tightly, she tried to wrap her mind around everything. It was too much. Tears flooded her eyes again, and she began to sob.
Feeling as if she might lose her balance, she sat down at the table. Her legs would no longer hold her up. Standing was out of the question. In fact, she wanted to lie flat on the floor. After all, isn’t that what she had done for her father and for Charlie? She had already spent years lying flat on the floor so they could walk all over her, and they had. Feeling desperate, she prayed, “Please, God, help me. I know I’ve done a lot of things wrong, but I’ve done the best I could do, and I’ve got nothing left now. I don’t know how to go on. Show me what to do.”
Marla opened her eyes and wiped her tears away. Lying in front of her on the table was the letter from the law firm. The divorce papers. She sniffled and wiped her eyes again as she picked up the envelope. Opening the envelope, she pulled out the contents, unfolded a letter, and began reading. Halfway through the letter, her breath caught in her throat. She reread the words again and again. Could this be real? Finally, as if to make the words more real, she read them out loud, “Your grandmother, Marlena Barton, has requested that you receive the property at 170 Surprise Valley Road, Guntersville, Alabama, as an inheritance from her.”
Marla gasped. This was the address to the lake house. Her heart felt heavy and full. She felt sadness, as she missed her grandparents, but her heart also swelled knowing her grandmother had left the lake house to her. She lay the letter on the table and stared at the wall. Memories of her times at the lake house with her grandparents came rushing back. She thought of the fishing trips with her grandfather, the trips into town with her grandmother, the Guntersville festivals, the quiet, still mornings as nature was waking up around the lake, and the evenings sitting out on the deck with her grandparents as the sun set. Tears collected in her eyes as the warmth and comfort of the memory of her grandparents enveloped her. They had left the grandfather clock to her, but she never imagined they’d leave her this property.
Was this her answer? Should she move to the lake house? Her thoughts were erratic. But my job is here in Cincinnati, and I need income. I don’t want anything from that jerk, and it’s not like he will give me anything anyway. She forced herself to focus. The lake house is paid for, and I have some money saved. I could move to Guntersville and work in an ER there. Staring blankly at the wall, the cyclone of thoughts in her head continued to spin. She couldn’t wrap her mind around her new reality. If only there were someone she could talk to, but there was no one. Her years with Charlie and her busy work hours had caused her to become isolated. A loud exhale escaped as tears continued to stream down her face.
After an hour of sitting, crying, and thinking, Marla grew tired. She dried her eyes and blew her nose, looking down at the letter again. She knew what she had to do.