CHAPTER 35
“What the hell are those?”
Josh stared at the plate Bart was holding out to him. It was covered in triangular cakes frosted a garish pink.
“They’re urinal cakes,” Bart replied, grinning broadly.
“What?” said Ryan, staring hard at the plate.
“You know,” Bart said. “Urinal cakes. That’s what they call those awful pink disinfectant things they stick in urinals. Only these are made out of pound cake.”
Josh grimaced. “You’re the Martha Stewart of the men’s room set,” he remarked.
Bart laughed. “Aren’t they fabulous? I thought they’d fit the theme of the party perfectly.”
“I’ll give you that much,” said Ryan, picking up a cake and looking at it closely. “What’s with the licorice whip curled on the top?”
“Pubic hair!” Bart exclaimed before turning to offer the tray to another guest.
Ryan and Josh exchanged a glance; then Ryan set his urinal cake on a nearby table. “I just can’t,” he said.
“Especially not when lemonade is the beverage of choice,” Josh agreed, holding up his cup of yellow liquid.
“Leave it to Bart to come up with the Tea Room Tea Party,” said Ryan.
It was the afternoon of the Fourth of July, and 138 Myrtlewood Lane was filled with a great many of Provincetown’s gay male population. All of them had come to get into the mood for the big event of the holiday weekend, a beach dance that culminated in a spectacular fireworks display that took place over the ocean. For the Fourth, the number of visitors to the town swelled to outrageous numbers, and somehow most of them had found their way to Bart’s party.
“Can you believe the amount of queenage in this place?” said Phil, coming to stand beside Josh and Ryan. “I swear to Christ there’s an Obsession haze hanging over the pool.”
“It wouldn’t be the Fourth without one of Bart’s parties,” Ryan said.
Phil nodded. “I know,” he replied, then laughed. “Remember the year he got that stripper from Rounds to dress up as the Statue of Liberty?”
Ryan laughed. “It was great,” he told a bewildered Josh. “Instead of a torch, the guy was holding a huge fucking dildo spray-painted silver.”
Josh gave a halfhearted laugh. I knew I should have stayed home, he thought miserably. The last place he felt like being was at a party, especially one overflowing with fags.
“Have you guys seen Aaron?”
Josh looked up to see Eric standing in front of them. He was holding a half-eaten urinal cake and looking annoyed.
“No,” Ryan answered. “I haven’t seen him in about half an hour.”
“I sent him to get me a beer,” said Eric testily. “Now I can’t find him.”
“Try the pool,” suggested Phil. “Everyone else seems to be out there.”
“Thanks,” Eric replied, heading for the door.
“So, are you coming to the dance with us tonight?” Phil asked Josh.
Josh shook his head. “I don’t think so,” he said.
“He and Doug broke up,” explained Ryan. “For good this time.”
Phil made a face. “Sorry,” he said.
“Yeah, well, these things happen,” said Josh. “But thanks,” he added.
“Sometimes I wonder what I’d do if Al and I ever broke up,” Phil continued. “It’s been so long since I was single, I don’t think I remember what it’s like.”
It’s lonely, Josh thought to himself. That’s what it feels like.
“Sure you do,” Ryan told Phil. “It feels like being a kid at Christmas and looking through the Sears catalog. There are all these things you could have, and every time you turn the page you find something else to add to your wish list.”
“I can’t relate,” said Phil. “I was one of those kids who always got sweaters. My mother knitted a new one every year.”
“Poor you,” said Ryan sympathetically.
“No,” Phil replied. “I liked them. They were warm, and I knew my mother made them just for me. Sometimes a sweater is better than a toy you play with for a while and then forget about.”
“Someone should have told Doug that,” Josh said quietly.
Before either Phil or Ryan could say anything, there was a commotion from the pool area. Then Eric came flying through the door, with Aaron behind him.
“I want him out of here!” Eric screamed. “I want him out now!”
A moment later, Toby entered the room. He looked angry and frightened. “But I told you—” he started to say.
“Shut up!” Eric yelled savagely. “Just shut the fuck up.”
“Eric,” Aaron said, putting his hand on his boyfriend’s arm, “he’s just a kid. He made a mistake.”
“I made a mistake?” Toby said angrily. “You’re the one who stuck his hand down my pants.”
“He’s lying,” Aaron said to Eric, ignoring Toby. “You know I would never do something like that.”
“Right,” Toby said. “Just like you never slept with me before your boyfriend got here.”
“I knew you were a whore the minute you walked through that door,” Eric said.
By now a group had gathered to watch the entertainment. Some looked on, not bothering to conceal their amusement at the unfolding drama. Others were more discreet in their voyeurism. Toby looked around at the men encircling him.
“You’re all fucked-up,” he said. “All of you.” He looked directly at Aaron. “Especially you,” he said before turning and heading for the front door.
“Don’t you ever come back here!” Eric called after him. “Never!”
The door slammed as Toby left the house. Aaron put his arms around the now-weeping Eric and began to console him. “It’s okay,” he said. “He’s gone. Nothing happened. It’s all okay.”
“All right, folks,” Phil called out. “It’s all over. Back to the party.” He turned to Ryan and Josh. “Excuse me while I go direct traffic,” he said. “You know how everyone wants to stare at an accident.”
When he was gone, Ryan looked at Josh. “Aaron or the houseboy,” he said with mock seriousness. “Who do you believe? Tune in today for another episode of As the Summer Share Turns.”
“I’ll be right back,” Josh told his friend.
He set his drink down and left the house. He could see Toby walking down the street a few blocks away. Breaking into a fast jog, he quickly caught up with the young man.
“Hey,” he said, “wait up.”
“Why?” Toby said. “So you can tell me what a whore I am too?”
“No,” Josh said, trying to catch his breath. “I’m pretty sure I know who was to blame for whatever happened.”
Toby looked at him suspiciously. “Why’s that?” he asked. “You don’t even know me.”
“No,” Josh admitted, “I don’t. But I know queens, and that little scene had all the makings of a classic drama. Let me guess. Aaron was trying to get you into bed. Eric walked in. Suddenly you became the one who was all over Aaron. Am I close?”
Toby looked at him again. This time he smiled a little. “Pretty close,” he said. “But there’s a little more to it. I still don’t get why you care though.”
“I’ve been there. Sort of,” Josh told him.
Toby looked at him warily.
“My boyfriend cheated on me,” explained Josh. “Let’s just say Aaron looked like he was trying a little too hard.”
“That seems to be his specialty,” Toby said. “What a jerk.”
“Want to talk about it?” Josh asked. When he saw Toby’s expression grow wary again, he added, “Don’t worry. I’m not looking for anything. It’s just that I think we both needed to get away from that party.”
“Okay,” Toby said after a moment.
“Great,” said Josh. “How about we get some drinks and go down to the beach?”
Fifteen minutes later, armed with some sodas and chips picked up at a little grocery near the beach, they were sitting in some dunes. They’d taken their shoes off, and their feet were plunged into the warm sand.
“I can’t believe he did that,” Josh told Toby, having just heard the story of his first encounter with Aaron. “Wait. I can believe he did that. What I can’t believe is that he’d keep trying to do it once you started working there.”
“What I can’t believe is that Eric doesn’t know,” Toby said, munching on a chip.
Josh laughed. “It’s called Gay Alternate Reality,” he said. “You just pretend that your life is exactly the way you want it, despite all evidence to the contrary. Eric doesn’t want to know that Aaron isn’t the perfect boyfriend he thinks he is.”
“That’s sad,” Toby said simply. “Really sad.”
“Yes, it is,” Josh agreed. “Unfortunately, it’s how a lot of queens live their lives.”
Toby shook his head. “One more reason why it’s easier to be straight,” he remarked.
“That’s not true,” said Josh. “There’s Straight Alternate Reality too. Do you really think all of those hetero couples are happy?”
“Not all of them,” Toby answered. “But more of them.”
“Not really,” countered Josh. “They’re just better at hiding things. Gay men like drama. We do everything on a huge scale, especially when it comes to romantic shit. Straight people prefer to keep it all hidden away so nobody will know that they’re just as fucked-up as we are.”
Toby laughed, making Josh smile. The kid seemed nice. Josh wondered how he’d ended up in P-Town, but now wasn’t the time to ask. Toby just needed someone to talk to, and Josh had nothing but time.
“My parents seem pretty happy,” Toby said, sounding a little sad.
Josh didn’t say anything. Most likely, he thought, Toby was wrong. Probably his mother frequently wondered how her life would be different if she’d married someone else, and his father fantasized about screwing the checkout girl at the Safeway. But saying so wasn’t going to make anything any better. Instead he said, “So, how was Aaron in bed?”
The unexpected comment seemed to shock Toby out of his gloominess.
“Um, well, I don’t have anyone else to compare him to,” he said. “But he seemed a little small.”
Josh laughed loudly. “Size queen!” he said.
Toby blushed. “It just seems to me that if you’re going to have something, you know, up there it should be worth it,” he said. “Is that mean?”
“Not if it’s true,” replied Josh. He put his arm around Toby’s shoulders. “You’re going to be just fine,” he said. “Just fine.”