Stress and Sexuality

Aside from the conditions described previously—certain diseases, hormonal problems, or neurological troubles—the most common cause of reduced sexual abilities and appetites is stress and overwork. These things suppress both female and male hormones, leading to dysfunctions of the autonomic nervous system.

However, stress affects the sexuality of women and of men very differently. To make love, a woman must be feeling good. On the other hand, a man feels good when he makes love. Thus, stress is more likely to reduce a woman’s desire for sex, whereas it is more likely to be viewed as curative for a man’s stress.

In either case, the best solution to a stress-impaired sex life is to slow down and take it easy. If this is simply not possible, at least practice relaxation techniques like yoga or meditation; force yourself to take some relatively long rest periods; get enough sleep; and let yourself go, both on the physical and the mental planes.

To restore the equilibrium of the libido, some effort is necessary. And again, the methods in this book are not a panacea. They will only be effective once you begin doing what is necessary in order to harmonize all your needs—sleep, rest, nourishment, and of course the flame of desire that you and your partner share.

That amorous spark is also sustained by surprises, gestures, words, and situations in which you and your partner impress each other. Do not wait for the relationship to become endangered before you try to repair what is irreparable. Do not wait until you realize that you have not been doing anything to continue seducing your partner. Seduction should be a matter of daily life; it proves that you are both interested in one another. If gestures of affection only go one way, your bond will begin to erode.

Warning

Practicing the exercises in this book while taking drugs that suppress your bodily energy, smoking excessively, drinking alcohol, or pursuing unbalanced, unhealthy, or irregular eating habits will slow your progress, and the results will be disappointing.