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AS CLAUDE EMBRACES the daughter he hasn't seen in over thirty years, my mind drifts to other matters. Did I fail my first mission as a Helper? Am I going to be fired again? I'm afraid to know the answer, and Azrael's unmoving lips don't provide any clue. He was relieved to see me safe, but that doesn't mean he isn't disappointed in me.
On the plus side, Claude's leg seems to be healing. Sam and two other angels from Asylum Seventeen wrapped it in some kind of magical cast, and less than a minute later, his leg was almost normal again.
“It's not your fault,” Azrael whispers to me.
“Hm?”
“The demons' attack,” he clarifies. “It wasn't your fault, Lucy. You couldn't have known they would be there, and it isn't as if you could fight them off on your own. You handled the situation well, all things considered.”
But I couldn't warp. I haven't mentioned that to Azrael yet, but I'm sure he already knows. If I could have gotten us out of the hospital, Claude wouldn't have been attacked.
Azrael suddenly manifests a big box of Reese's Pieces and passes it to me. “For you,” he says. “I thought you might need it after the day you've been through.”
The candies rattle as I clutch the box to my heart. “Aww, I think that's the sweetest thing anyone's ever done for me!”
His brow pinches at my claim. “Really?”
“Seriously. I'm not even kidding.” I tear into the box like I'm starving and pour a few pieces into my mouth.
While I'm chewing, Sam drifts over and wraps an arm around me. “I am so sorry about what happened to you!” he exclaims. “Are you sure you're going to be alright?”
“Yeah.”
“What you went through... it sounds terrifying. And just so you know, I could have given that job to anyone and it could have ended the same way.”
It's nice of Sam and Azrael to try to cheer me up, but I still feel like I failed. The image of Claude's charred leg is going to be stuck in my head forever. Someone more seasoned might have been able to prevent that. Someone more seasoned definitely wouldn't have forgotten how to warp in the heat of the moment.
Azrael catches my attention with a heavy sigh. “What's up?” I ask him.
“I'm just thinking... I should probably get back to work.”
Nuh uh. No way. After all that, he's just going to leave me? “I thought you said you'd never leave me again?” I remind him. Sam, realizing we might be on the verge of a private discussion, excuses himself without a word.
“I might have been exaggerating a bit,” Azrael says. “Besides, I doubt you'd want me with you all the time.”
Grinning devilishly, I reply, “I can think of worse things.”
The Asylum Seventeen volunteers roll out a banquet to celebrate Claude and May's reunion, but I doubt I'll stick around for it. I'm happy enough with my Reese's Pieces.
Azrael says, “If anything, this debacle has forced me to reconsider if it's truly necessary for Helpers to perform their missions alone. It might be safer in teams of two.”
“Exactly!” I exclaim. “I don't think I would have freaked out even half as much if someone else was with me.”
“Maybe I could go with you on your next mission?”
I can feel my smile turning giddy when he asks that. He wants to go with me again, doesn't he? He misses going on missions with me. I shouldn't tease him too much, though, because I don't know how he'll take it.
I finally ask the burning question of the day. “So... did I fail?”
“No, of course not. Like your friend Samuel said, that would have been a trying mission for anyone.”
“Not for you. You ripped through those demons like butter. It was seriously impressive.”
Azrael doesn't respond. I have a feeling he has something else on his mind.
“Lucy,” he whispers my name. “If you don't mind, I would like to take you somewhere private.”
I clap a hand on his arm and say, “I'm in. Let's go.” I hope that doesn't sound too enthusiastic, but I've been dying to be alone with him.
Azrael warps us to the Hill of Black Roses, the first place I met him. I'm still enthralled by the inky black petals on these flowers. I've never seen anything like them.
Azrael says, “You always wondered why I don't grieve for my charges. Well, the truth is... I do. I grieve for them all the time. Many years ago, I started visiting this hill after my missions. Back then, the flowers were a vibrant, bright red. I would sit among the flowers, lost in my thoughts, and over time... my grief altered their hue.”
My eyes gape at the revelation. “You turned the flowers black?”
“I believe I did,” Azrael says. “I would rage, I would mourn... sometimes, if a mission truly bothered me, I would even shed a tear or two.”
“Nuh uh!” I exclaim. “There's no way you ever cried!”
“But I do cry. For every lost child that's taken from his mother, for every two lovers that are torn apart, I mourn. My heart hurts for them. Even though I know they'll be reunited one day, I feel their pain... but I bury it. I bury it because I have to.” Azrael squats near the flowers and pushes some of the black petals aside. “Look at this, Lucy.”
It's not hard to figure out what he wants me to see. Hidden among the black flowers, there's a single red rose.
“I noticed this a few days ago,” Azrael says. “For some odd reason, I think the flowers are turning red again.”
“Really?” I crouch next to Azrael, to better observe the flower. It certainly stands out among the rest. “Why do you think that's happening?”
“If I had to guess, I would say it's because of you. You have given me a reason to be happy again. My existence revolves around death and only death. Since I've met you, you'd made it something more than that.”
When Azrael rises, I rise with him. I want to say something, but I'm stunned. I had no idea he felt this way about me.
“You've given me something to be happy about, Lucy.” Reaching for my hand, he asks, “Do you think you could ever like me, as dull as I am?”
“You're not dull!” I defend him. “And I already like you. I like you a lot.”
There's a better word than “like” to describe how I feel about him, but I think I'll save that confession for another day.
“I care about you... more than you know,” Azrael says. “When I realized you were under attack, I panicked, and I came to you as fast as I could. I was so afraid you would be hurt, and I was angry with myself for insisting that Helpers should go alone. You will never go alone again. I mean it.”
I don't want him to think I'm incapable, so I ask, “I'm not the only Helper who's going to need a babysitter, right?”
“No... no, of course not. Starting tomorrow, all Helpers will form teams of two.” Lowering his voice, he adds, “And I want you on my team.”
This is literally my dream come true. If I didn't jump at this opportunity, I'd be an idiot. “Okay. I accept your invitation.”
When Azrael goes silent, I feel a little frustrated. I want more than this. Getting cancer at fifteen really stunted me in some ways. I've been waiting eighteen years for my first kiss, and frankly, I don't want to wait another minute. I deserve at least one kiss from the guy of my dreams, don't I?
“Kiss me.” The request flies out of my mouth. I'm surprised at myself for being so bold.
Azrael immediately leans down to fulfill my request. I try to be calm, but on the inside, I'm screaming. It's really going to happen. He's really going to kiss me. I'm short and he's tall, so he has to bend down a lot to reach my lips. Standing on tiptoes doesn't seem to help.
Pleasure tingles through my body when Azrael's lips meet mine. This is officially the most amazing moment of my life, and I'm glad I didn't waste my first kiss on some stupid high school boy. This is much better.
I don't just get one kiss from the guy of my dreams. I get two. When we finally pull apart, his fingers stay in my hair, sifting through my brown locks.
“You're a beautiful girl, Miss Alvarez,” Azrael whispers. “You're beautiful, and you're mine.”
“I am yours,” I agree. “I hope you know... this means you'll be watching a lot more movies from now on, right?”
Azrael flinches a bit, but he's smiling, so I don't think I've rocked his world too hard.
“For you,” Azrael says, “I would watch all the movies in the world.”
His declaration makes me chuckle. “Wow, the Angel of Death is going to be a movie buff now? You've really changed.”
“I have.” As his mouth descends on mine once again, he whispers against my lips, “And it was worth it.”