With Christmas just two days away, the hospital matron summoned Daisy to her office. When she arrived, she found that all the ward sisters were in attendance. The mood was sombre.
‘There is danger in the air, Sisters. Some nurses, particularly our younger ones, are feeling very nervous. The Japanese are closing in; they are advancing down the Malaysia peninsula and it is likely they will soon attack us here. I want us to be ready if that happens. Evacuation procedures will be practised from now on, but with good humour, so as not to further dismay the lower ranks.’
Daisy understood the fears everyone had and the importance of the senior staff keeping everyone’s spirits up. Every day news came in of atrocities, and fears surrounding the Japanese advancement grew as the wounded, who had been trying to hold them back, flooded the wards. She and Florrie had the added worry of Billy, too. Both dreaded him being brought in badly hurt. They’d hoped to visit him in Malaya, but now that was impossible and, as far as they knew, Billy had no idea they were even stationed so near him. But they reassured themselves with the knowledge that between Malaya and Singapore there were so many British forces stationed, and ready to defend them, that they felt confident they would beat the Japanese back and keep Singapore British.
When they had arrived in Singapore on 15 November there had been little talk of war. It all seemed to have been left behind. They’d been in awe of the beautiful island, and Daisy was glad they had explored as much as they could during that time.
She remembered feeling a strange sensation of belonging as she and Florrie, and the other fifteen nurses and one other nursing sister, were helped off the boat by laughing, very friendly coolies. They had then been transported up a shady, tree-lined road.
A snippet of conversation came back to her: ‘Eeh, Florrie, I never knew such places existed. It’s grand.’
‘If our ma could see us now, she’d be astonished.’
The ride in an open-topped bus, which had seen better days and puffed out fumes as if in annoyance at still being in service, was a little hair-raising, as children ran alongside, calling out to them and greeting them, but also asking for a cent. One was really cheeky and shouted, ‘British rich, British give me one dollar.’ Daisy and Florrie had laughed their heads off.
The chatter on the bus was full of anticipation, interspersed with the waving of hand-held fans, as the true heat that they would experience came home to roost.
They were taken to the Royal Alexandra Military Hospital, a beautiful white building with many windows and balconies, surrounded by lush green grass and trees that provided a gentle breeze.
Matron greeted them as they entered the reception area, a place of cool calm – an oasis after stepping out of the midday heat. Here, white stone walls surrounded the tiled floor, which shone like glass. A desk took up most of one wall and several doors led off to places unknown at the time, although they later found that they were passageways to the wards, theatres and staff quarters.
Matron, a tall lady, whose only claim to beauty was her piercing blue eyes, which distracted the onlooker from her crooked nose and slightly buck-teeth, made up for what she didn’t have in looks with her charm. Daisy had taken to her from the off and had listened intently as she made her welcome speech.
‘I’m Matron Prinder and I’m very pleased to welcome you all. I have a list of your names, but at the moment you are just a sea of faces. We will rectify that tomorrow, but today you are free to do as you please. Tindrenshai, who is an orderly here, will take you to your quarters and, once you have unpacked, he will be waiting in the corridor to take you to lunch. Then I want you to explore, so dress in something cool and be at the front of the building by two p.m. The bus will be waiting and will take you on a trip. Oh, if you have packed your swimwear, take that with you, as you are in for a treat at the end of your tour. You will be taken to the European Swimming Pool, a place that we all frequent during our time off. Enjoy yourselves, then report to my office at nine a.m. tomorrow morning, dressed for duty.’
A warm feeling had overcome Daisy and she knew it had Florrie, too. ‘By, I reckon as we’ve landed on our feet here, Daisy. Fancy having a matron like that! My last one bawled me out for sommat or other, the moment she set eyes on me.’
‘Aye, they can be tyrants. I’ve had a few like that. But I suppose it’s being in this wonderful place – I mean, how can you not feel in a constant good mood? Everyone’s so happy.’
‘They’re a good lot that we’re with an’ all. That Phoebe, I thought she’d be stuck up as she speaks in such a posh voice, but she’s a real giggle.’
‘That’s where you have the advantage on me, Florrie. Me being a sister, I have to keep meself a bit aloof or I’ll never command any respect during working hours. But Bett, the other sister on this trip with us, is a nice girl. As you knaw, we’re friends already. Oh, there she is. I’ll leave you now, lass, as we’ll be taken to different quarters. But we’ll have a lovely afternoon together.’
They visited Raffles Place in the afternoon, a bustling, exciting area of white buildings of a similar style to the hospital, some with domed roofs and others with pointed ones, all different in a subtle way. The thing Daisy remembered, and that made the most impression, were the large number of windows, which glinted as if they were made of a thousand diamonds.
The streets were lined with shops and cafes and the traffic was heavy, with cars and military vehicles. The air smelt of fried food, as delicious-looking delicacies were being cooked in the open. They were told that Sir Stamford Raffles had taken the island of Singapore from the Dutch many years ago, and that many of the important places were named after him.
After a cooling iced tea in a pavement cafe, they’d been taken to the pool – a wonderful place that seemed to lie at the heart of British social life. Daisy and Florrie decided they could spend the rest of their lives enjoying the respite from the heat given by the huge ceiling fans, and watching the comings and goings in the square. Soft music played, and drinking and socializing seemed to be the main occupation, when the full dance band came into its own.
The pool had been a wonderful cooling experience, and Daisy and Florrie had both impressed others with their ability in the water and their diving skills – something they had learned off the jetty at the end of the old boathouse, which was now their ma’s and Aunt Susan’s shop. They now joined the swimming club for a fee of two dollars fifty a month, and would spend most of their days off and many exciting, glamorous evenings here.
It had been here that they had met Alex, a senior medic with whom they had only had brief dealings at the hospital, and Giles, an officer based at the military depot.
Daisy was head over heels in love with Alex; and Florrie and Giles, Daisy knew, were very attracted to each other. Giles was a little hesitant, though. He didn’t believe in the kind of romance that could occur in such a place, and thought that the place to meet the love of his life must be England. However, Daisy suspected that his feelings for Florrie were breaking down this resistance, which she thought had its roots in snobbery. Florrie, with her northern accent and lovely open nature, which displayed no sophistication whatsoever, wasn’t exactly officer-wife material. Despite this, Daisy liked Giles and felt sorry for him being trapped by convention.
As she listened to Matron now, Daisy’s heart felt heavy. The rumours were terrifying and a whole different atmosphere permeated the hospital than had been their first experience. Bett nudged her. It was something she often did when she’d seen something to giggle at, so Daisy was shocked when she glanced at Bett’s face and saw a look of terror.
Bett’s lovely face, which dimpled when she smiled, distracted from the rest of her body, which showed that she liked to eat a lot. Normally a jolly person, taking everything in her stride, it was disconcerting to see that happiness desert her. Moving a little closer to her, Daisy found Bett’s hand and squeezed it, trying to offer reassurance.
When Matron dismissed them, Bett’s voice shook with fear. ‘If the Japanese come, we’ll all be killed. They slice your head off. Oh, Daisy, I’m so afraid.’
‘I knaw, we all are, but we can’t show it. Matron said there are plans to evacuate us all, if it looks like the defence of the island won’t hold. Take every note of the procedures and you’ll be fine. We all will. The army will protect us, and there’ll be plenty of ships to take us away from here. Try to be strong for the younger ones, Bett. It’s our duty.’
‘I will, Daisy. I suppose, where you come from, you are born tough. But I’ve known nothing but a gentle life, being protected from harm, and I don’t know how to do that for myself.’
‘I were protected by the best ma that a girl could have, but not mollycoddled; we had to learn to stand on our own two feet. You’ve done that, too, Bett. You left the family home and trained to be a nurse; you cope in some dire situations, when we ain’t got enough beds and men are screaming in agony around us. I’ve even seen you give your own blood for a soldier and carry on working to administer it, to save his life. You are brave and strong, Bett – you are. And it is now our turn to protect those in our charge. We can do it.’
Bett seemed to grow in stature in front of Daisy’s eyes as she listened, and Daisy saw her gain control as the terror left her. ‘Yes, I can. I’m sorry, Daisy, I lost it there for a moment. Thank you for making me see that I am brave – I know it now. Just let any of those Japs try to touch one of my nurses and it’ll be me that does the slicing.’
‘That’s the spirit, Bett. Now, I’m off-duty in an hour and meeting Alex, and I’m going to forget it all. But first I’m going to reassure my nurses that there is a procedure in place, that we will be practising it and they will be safe.’
They hugged as they parted, something they’d never done before. Daisy smiled at Bett. ‘Nursing sisters to the rescue, eh?’ With this, she charged down the corridor pretending to hold a gun, to the sound of Bett laughing as if she was fit to burst.
Alex was waiting outside in his car for her when she stepped outside the hospital an hour and a half later. She felt good in the calf-length frock she’d bought recently – made of cotton, it was a colour she’d put somewhere between cream and soft yellow. The fitted bodice had tiny sleeves that were gathered into a cuff that fell well above her elbows. The square neckline showed a hint of her bust. Gathered at the waist, the skirt fell in wide pleats that gave a smart appearance. She’d teamed this with white gloves, a white handbag and white-heeled shoes. Her hat – a woven floppy-brimmed affair – gave her shade and had a cream silk band around the base of the brim, which was finished in a huge bow at the back and flowed to her shoulders, keeping her neck cool as the breeze played with it, causing a fan effect.
‘You look beautiful, darling. That colour really brings out the golden strands in your hair.’
Alex’s light kiss thrilled her. A voice calling her name got her looking back. Florrie stood on the balcony of her ward, waving madly and blowing kisses. Daisy thought she’d like to keep that picture in her mind forever – her lovely sister, a kind, gentle person whom she loved dearly. Alex waved, too, then he pleased and surprised Daisy by saying, ‘Florrie’s lovely. I think I’m going to like having her as a sister-in-law.’
‘Oh? So you’re thinking of marrying one of the family then?’
Alex laughed. She loved his laugh. She loved everything about him, even when, like now, he was teasing her.
‘Yes, I am thinking about it. You said you had a younger sister, didn’t you? The prettiest of you all, with a petite figure, not a buxom one, like you.’
Daisy hit him with the gloves she’d removed from her hands. ‘You told me you like your girls to be nicely padded in the right places.’
‘I do, my darling. So you will have to be the one to marry me, if I am to have Florrie as my sister-in-law.’
Not sure if he meant this or was still joking with her, Daisy didn’t reply. She giggled and was rewarded with a look that melted her heart.
Alex drove in silence for a while. He surprised her by not turning towards the town, but heading for the countryside instead. The road wound around, bend after bend. The roar of Alex’s sports car made it difficult to carry on any further conversation, so Daisy enjoyed the time, just looking at him. Watching how his dark, curly hair flopped about in the wind; imagining his twinkling blue eyes looking into hers, and herself snuggling into his strong body.
But Alex’s mention of Rosie had Daisy feeling unable to concentrate, as her sister kept dancing into her head. And so did the image of her German man, for she was certain that Rosie did carry a torch for him. Suddenly she wanted to tell Rosie that it was all right to love whoever she wanted to; that she understood the feeling of falling hopelessly in love, and how you didn’t choose the person, he was chosen for you in some magical way – otherwise, why didn’t it happen to her until she was thousands of miles away from home, in a land she’d never in her wildest dreams thought she would ever visit? And if Alex hadn’t been British, but a German, or African, or Japanese for that matter, it wouldn’t have mattered; she would love him and want to be with him. I’ll write to Rosie and tell her this. I can’t bear the way I was with her. I need her to know that I approve of whoever she loves.
Why she felt this compunction, Daisy didn’t consider at this moment, as Alex had pulled off the road into a dirt track. A tingling excitement grabbed the muscles of her stomach as he switched off the engine and turned to her.
‘I’ve brought a picnic with me. I had the kitchen staff make it up. I want you all to myself, Daisy. I don’t want to share you with a roomful in a stuffy restaurant.’
Daisy couldn’t speak. There was something in the way Alex was looking at her, and in the tone of his voice, that held her suspended.
As he got out of the car, she did the same, watching him shyly, as if this was their first meeting. Out of the boot he took a large blanket; he must have taken it off his bed, as she had one on hers exactly the same, a sort of cotton, woven fabric that kept you cool and yet warm, once the temperature dropped.
‘Spread that out, darling, and I’ll get out the box they packed for us. I have no idea what is in it.’
After lifting out the small box, Alex bent over his boot again, and this time he brought out a bottle of champagne and two glasses. Daisy wanted to make a joke and ask what they were celebrating, but the moment didn’t call for triviality.
Once she’d laid out the blanket, she sat on it and looked around her. They were high up on a hill surrounded by other hills, all lush with greenery and trees. In the distance she could see the sea shimmering in the heat, a deep blue against the white sand. I’d like heaven to be like this, please, God. A shudder went through her at this thought.
‘Are you all right, darling?’
The sentence had slipped off Alex’s tongue as if he’d always spoken in this serious way, instead of his usual jokey manner.
‘Yes, someone walked over my grave, as they say.’
‘You’re not going to be in a grave for a very long time.’ He lowered himself down beside her. She could see that he was holding something clenched tightly in his hand. ‘And I hope you will spend that time with me, my darling Daisy. Will you marry me?’
This second proposal of the day was heartfelt, his look so sincere and full of love for her that Daisy’s spirits soared, and she realized she was truly in heaven now – this very minute.
‘Yes, yes, I will. Oh, Alex, I love you.’
A tear glistened in his eye and his lips came down on hers, his body pressing her until she was lying beneath him, looking up into his beautiful face, with the sun forming a halo around it.
‘I love you, Daisy. Will you do me the honour of wearing my mother’s ring, to bind us together in the legacy of love that she left with it, and had with my father?’
Daisy could only nod as Alex took her hand and slipped a diamond ring on her left finger. Her own tears of joy matched his.
‘Oh, Daisy, my Daisy. I love you.’
‘Alex . . . Alex. I can’t believe you’re me fiancé. Ta, ta ever so much. I’ll love you forever.’
His lips kissed the ring, then came down on hers. Her heart beat so loudly and swelled in her chest as she accepted his love. ‘Daisy, I want to make love to you. I want to make you mine.’
‘I want you to. Oh, Alex, me love, I do.’
With a sudden movement that took her by surprise, Alex sat up. ‘I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have asked. It was the heat of the moment. Forgive me. I love you too much to—’
‘Shush.’ Sitting up, Daisy put her finger on his lips. ‘Who knaws how long we have, Alex. Make me your lass – truly yours. Let’s make a memory that will last us forever, in case the unthinkable happens to either of us.’
There were no more protests, only a deep loving – a giving and a taking – as Alex gently made Daisy his. The pain she’d expected on him first entering her didn’t happen. She didn’t understand why, and Alex didn’t question it, but only, to her intense pleasure, deepened his thrusts into her, once he knew she was ready, loving her with his hands, his mouth and his whole being until they were truly one, calling out in ecstasy their complete and utter joy.
Lying in his arms afterwards, she allowed her body to cry out its release and the pent-up anguish she was feeling about the world and her loved ones. Alex allowed her time, soothing her, telling her of his love and kissing her chestnut curls, which tumbled around her face.
Part of Daisy worried that he might be questioning whether he was the first man she’d made love to, but he showed no signs of worrying. She just wished she could get the nagging worry out of her head that he might think it at some time, for he had truly been her first. Suddenly she decided she had to broach the subject.
‘I expected it to hurt me the first time. Ta, me love, for being so gentle.’
‘Oh, darling, I thought you were worrying about something. Hasn’t your training taught you that most women don’t have an intact hymen by the time they are twenty-five? And not because they are not virgins, but because it has been broken by some activity or other – something as simple as riding a bike or a horse can do it. I never doubted you for a moment. In the short time I’ve known you, your honesty is only one of the many things I love about you. You say it as it is: take you or leave you. I know where I am with you, my darling.’
They laughed together at this. ‘Well, I’m telling you this now: you are all I ever want in a man, and you made me feel the best I’ve ever felt in me life just now.’
They held each other in silence for a moment.
When Alex turned his head and whispered, ‘We will better that, my darling, in a lifetime of making love,’ Daisy snuggled into him and wanted to remember this moment forever.
Lifting her head, Alex looked into her eyes, then kissed her so passionately that soon she was lying beneath him once more, yielding to him, crying out with the sensations that were taking her to an even higher place than the first time, as wave after wave of pleasure vibrated through her. Alex’s moans joined hers as he explored every part of her, taking her clothes off as he did so, until she was naked before him and the sun kissed every part of her.
They lay afterwards, spent but in a happy place they thought no one could ever touch. A place that blocked out the world and the war, and all they had to deal with as medics, and cocooned them till they felt safe.
Coming down to earth wasn’t easy, for their senses and awareness of each other were heightened beyond anything Daisy had ever thought possible.
It was hunger that prompted them to become practical, but even as they sat and ate the delicious delicacies – squid, breaded and fried, vine leaves stuffed with olives and fish, and small naan-breads laced with a seaweed spread – there was a sensuousness about the atmosphere surrounding them.
It was Alex who brought some normality back between them, as he joked that he felt as if he would grow fins and start to open and close his mouth if he was here in Singapore much longer, as they served so much fish. ‘You are what you eat, my father used to say, when he tried to make me eat Brussels sprouts. Have you ever met anyone who liked Brussels sprouts?’
‘Yes – me. I think they’re grand. Me ma cooks them all crunchy. But she won’t buy them till there’s been a frost, as she reckons as they’re not ready till then.’
‘I can’t wait to meet your ma. She sounds such a wonderful person. And your little sister and your brothers. All the people you talk about with such love. I miss my mother so much.’
‘I’m sorry, darling. By, it comes to sommat when God takes two lovely folk, like your ma and da were taken.’
‘Yes, it was a massive blow to see mother dying slowly, and then for Father to have a heart attack at her funeral. Being an only child, that left me with one elderly great-aunt. She’s very lively, though, and a joy to be around. She lives in my house and keeps everything running. You’ll love her when you come to live there.’
‘Aye, I knaw I will. She sounds like a posh version of me ma, the way you talk of her.’
‘Yes, I think that’s what she is, as I feel so close to your ma, when you talk about her. Well, my darling, we’d better sort ourselves out and get back. I’m on-duty this evening.’
‘Oh? I was hoping we could make an evening of it – go dancing or sommat.’
‘Sorry, I can’t, but we have the rest of our lives in which to dance, so don’t look downhearted. Hold my hand and let me help you up.’
When Alex lifted her, he took Daisy into his arms. His body began to sway to a tune he was humming. And there, deep in the hillside country of Singapore, they danced a waltz. She never wanted this moment to end – the afternoon would be etched in her memory. She was dizzy with love, and nothing could ever change or hurt that. Nothing.
Only the shiver that seized her body seemed to be saying otherwise. She dismissed it. Everyone felt these moments of anxiety. How could they not, with their lives in danger every moment of every day? And now the safe haven that she and Florrie thought they had found was in greater danger than most.