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~Waylon’s POV~
Clubs had never been something that I enjoyed. I’d prefer going to a bar over a club, and yet neither were my scene. I didn’t like crowded places, people pressing into each other, not caring about personal space.
So as soon as we arrived, I went straight for a table to claim and planned to remain there the entire time. I ordered a round of shots for everyone, watching Josie practically brimming with excitement. That made me realize that even before she had disappeared, clubs hadn’t been her scene either. Was this really the first time she was in one? Our small town didn’t exactly have clubs. Plenty of bars, but clubs were too much like a city thing, and we had never lived near one. The opportunity to try one out had been rare for her.
Josie kept looking around the club, eyes big, taking in the mass of bodies grinding against each other and pretending it was dancing. Did we let her down growing up? It wasn’t like we weren’t adventurous. They just didn’t include getting blackout drunk at bars and finding random hookups. We went hiking. Camped. Spent as many days outside as possible.
I couldn’t look away from her. Every little giggle, every laugh, the sound of her voice. It all drew me in, so I didn’t bother trying to fight it and watched her. Jason and Foster did well in keeping her happy and going. It made me feel like the third wheel, watching the two of them with her. I didn’t fit in there anymore.
The ache in my chest agreed with me. My place wasn’t by her side. Not anymore.
Our shots came and Josie took the duty of passing them around.
“Here,” she said with a big grin. There was a challenge in her eyes, daring me to say no.
Another new thing. Knocking back shots like this.
“Thanks,” I mumbled wondering if she heard me over all the loud music.
Her smile said she did. My body warmed at her attention and the moment she turned to Foster, it turned ice cold. Damn it, how could she affect me like this?
“To having a fun night!” Josie lifted her shot glass.
We all followed along with her. When she knocked it back, we did too.
I hid my grimace, remembering why I wasn’t a fan of the hard liquor. The tequila burned as it went down, tasting like I was drinking motor oil instead. Josie didn’t seem affected at all as she laughed. It was like she was high off the energy in the club. It practically thrummed through our bodies to the beat of the music, enticing us to go to the dance floor.
It didn’t take long for Josie to get up and join the mass of bodies grinding together. The others went with her, leaving me to watch them and protect our table. I didn’t mind as I watched the way Josie danced. She beckoned the male population with the way she moved her body. Even I was tempted to go up and join her.
How much had we deprived her growing up? We had kept her close to us, pushing away anyone else who tried to befriend or date her. That meant depriving her the simple experience of coming to a club to dance the night away. I glowered at some of the men watching Josie dance. She wasn’t aware of how she affected those around her.
Only Foster and Jason being there kept them away. They wrapped themselves around her, shielding her from any other man wanting to join in with her. One man was brave enough to approach, but Foster was quick to make him back off with one glance. Foster was a scary asshole when he wanted to be. Only around Josie and us was he gentle and expressive.
There was a loud cheer from a group of girls nearby that caught my attention. The crowd broke enough for me to see what they were doing. Apparently, they were all doing shots, one after another. It took me a moment to recognize them.
Sofia. There she was, in the middle with all her friends, laughing as she knocked her head back and took another shot. How did I not know she was going to be here?
I glanced at Josie, taking in how she looked, how much she was having fun, and then at Sofia, having the same amount of fun with her friends.
Shit.
Guilt slammed into me. I said no to Sofia to come here with Josie. That was bad for a huge number of reasons. Granted, I didn’t think we would end up going out. I thought we were going to spend another night in her hotel suite.
I watched my girlfriend as she smiled at one of her friends. I used to love her smile, how big it would become, infectious to those all around her. When she smiled, others couldn’t help but return it. When I had met her, that was the first time I felt like I was able to truly express myself since Josie had disappeared. That was what brought us closer, how good she made me feel during a time I felt like I was drowning.
And I had a ring sitting at my apartment, burning a hole in my dresser drawer to prove how far I was going to go to keep her and that smile.
Asshole. I was a complete asshole. I stared at her, taking in her excitement, and tried to find those feelings again. Tried to remind myself why I loved her, why I was with her. Instead, my gaze went to Josie. To her happiness. To the way seeing it made me all warm and fuzzy, how it was like micro explosions dancing across my skin.
Two different feelings.
And I absolutely hated how I preferred Josie’s smile over my own girlfriend’s.
That was fucked up and gave me way too much to consider.
