Alfie was waiting at her locker after school. “Can we talk?”
Ali could barely see the street when they stepped outside, the fog was so thick. It reminded Ali of the spring she was five years old and had pneumonia. Feverish, she had stayed in bed for days, listening to the sound of kids playing outside. It was like they existed in a different world, a world she couldn’t imagine being part of. The fog was the same. Somewhere in the world the sun was shining, but Ali didn’t think she’d ever see the sun again.
“This isn’t about Murray and Cassie, is it?” she asked.
Alfie stopped. “Has something happened?”
Ali shook her head, relieved Murray and Cassie hadn’t complained about her to Alfie.
Alfie took a deep breath. “I need to talk to you about something.”
“What?
“I’m in trouble.”
“What kind of trouble?”
Alfie’s hand shook as he rubbed his forehead. “Something’s happened. I think you know what I’m talking about. . . .”
Confused, Ali stared at him. She’d never seen him so upset. Then it hit her: Digger’s invitation. “Your grandfather’s mad that Digger invited your family to Gigi’s party.”
“What? Oh yeah, I saw Digger out on the porch, putting it in the mailbox. For a second I thought it was my dad. They look so much alike.”
“That must have freaked you out.”
“It did. I knew Granddad would be furious if I talked to him, but I didn’t care. I have so many questions, so I went outside.”
Why hadn’t Digger told her he’d talked to Alfie? “Did he answer them?”
Alfie took a ragged breath. When he finally spoke, his voice was flat. “As soon as I opened the door, he ran to his car and drove away. I waved for him to come back, but he didn’t.”
Ali’s jaw clenched. She was so sick of the Sloane Family Feud she wanted to scream. It was ridiculous that Digger hadn’t talked to Alfie!
“You didn’t tell me he was bringing us a party invitation.” It sounded like an accusation.
“I didn’t know until just before he left.”
Alfie’s forehead puckered. “I didn’t think we’d get one after last Sunday.”
They stopped at an intersection and waited for the light to change. Ali scowled. Why was she even hanging out with Alfie? Before, when she was sure the Sloanes would be reunited, she’d loved walking home with him. Now it just made her sad and frustrated. She wouldn’t do it anymore. Besides, she’d be moving soon and so would he. They’d never see each other again, so what was the point?
She didn’t try to hide her annoyance. “Inviting your family was the right thing to do.”
“Granddad was furious.”
“Whatever. Your grandfather needs to get over himself.”
The light changed, but Alfie didn’t move. “He’s not awful, you know. He’s sad.”
Ali’s patience plummeted. “Well, that makes two of us.”
“Why are you sad?”
“This stupid fog, the fact that I don’t have any friends, the fact that Gigi’s been sick. I’m sad all the time, and your big trouble is that my dad inconveniently left a party invitation at your house.”
Alfie leaned back, as if she’d slapped him. “I didn’t know Gigi was sick.”
It figured Alfie wouldn’t ask about her problems. He’d said he wanted to be her friend, but he sure didn’t act like one. “She was really sick with a bad cold and sometimes she gets confused. I’m worried about her.”
“But she seems okay. I mean, you’re having a party for her.”
Really, Alfie was too much. “How would you know? You don’t even know her! Guess what? Gigi is going to die soon, that’s why we’re having the party. All you care about is your precious grandfather. I did the right thing and went to see him. If you care as much as you say you do, you’d visit Gigi before it’s too late!”
ALI’S RULES ABOUT NOT LOSING FRIENDS
Alfie opened his mouth, then shut it. The light changed again, and he rushed to cross.
Ali stayed put. “That’s right,” she called after him. “Run away! That’s what Sloanes do!”
Alfie disappeared into the fog. Ali wrapped her arms around herself and began to cry. Why had she been so mean? Things had started so well for her in Saint John, but she’d ruined everything. For someone who could be anyone, she realized there was one thing she couldn’t be: happy.
Ali was relieved to find Digger the dog asleep in front of the fireplace when she slipped into the house. She wasn’t ready to talk about her day. Since everyone always said “quiet as a mouse,” Ali set her knapsack on a chair, morphed into a brown mouse, and snuck upstairs. She was scurrying past Gigi’s room when her great-grandmother called out to her.
“Alison, is that you?”
How Gigi heard her was a mystery, but Ali switched back into herself and stepped into Gigi’s bedroom. Gigi was in her chair, staring out the window.
“How are you?” Ali asked, leaning over to kiss Gigi’s wrinkled cheek.
“Surviving. You, on the other hand, look terrible.”
Ali didn’t try to deny it. “Today was the worst day of my life. Everybody hates me.”
“You must have done something horrible; there are lots of students at Princess Elizabeth School and you’ve been there only a couple of weeks.”
Ali collapsed onto the floor and buried her face against Gigi’s knees. “Things were supposed to be better here, but it’s the worst place ever. Except for living with you,” she added, looking up at Gigi with tearstained cheeks.
“That goes without saying. Want to talk about it?”
“Do I have to?”
“I find talking things out helps. Why don’t you start at the beginning?”
What was the beginning? Debate team? Meeting Alfie? Becoming friends with Emily? Turning into a Copycat? Disappointing Murray and Cassie? Arguing with Alfie?
“I never should have joined the debate team.”
“Why did you?”
“To meet Alfie, and then I pretended to like it because he did. But I hate public speaking; I’m terrible at it.”
“I was terrible at first too.”
The idea that Gigi could be terrible at anything shocked Ali. “Every time I do it, my stomach hurts.”
“Then don’t do it.”
“But they’re counting on me.”
“They’ll get over it. That’s one problem solved. What’s next?”
“In my old school, I tried to act like everyone else to get along. But it’s not working here. Emily says I don’t have opinions of my own. Murray and Cassie only like me when I do what they want me to do. They got mad at me because I didn’t look happy during their presentation. But I was upset because they didn’t choose me to play their stupid Jeopardy game. And I’ve been so busy learning to be a Copycat that I haven’t kept up with my schoolwork. I didn’t help Emily with our project and I did a terrible job of presenting to the class. And today I lost my temper at Alfie because he won’t come to your party—”
“My goodness! That is a litany of woes! What do your problems have in common?”
“I don’t know.”
“I think you do. They have YOU in common.”
Ali was not liking this conversation at all.
“But it’s hard to be a Copycat and a new kid!”
“It is. But it sounds like you haven’t been honest with people about the real you.”
“The real me? You and Digger don’t tell people that you’re Copycats.”
Gigi held up a bony finger. “It’s not the same thing. We choose not to tell most people something that is very personal about ourselves. Everybody is entitled to have a personal life, Ali, even Copycats. Do any of your friends know about your powers?”
“Just Murray and Cassie.”
“Have they told anyone?”
“No . . .”
“So, you’re telling me they have been loyal to you but you haven’t returned the favor?”
Ali didn’t like the way that sounded.
“When you change just to impress people, whether you’re a Copycat or not, you’re not being true to yourself.”
Ali let that sink in. “I don’t even know who I am,” she whispered. “I’ve been the new kid so many times I’ve had to be like everybody else to fit in.”
For the first time, Gigi sounded sympathetic when she responded. “What’s happened to you isn’t fair. You’ve paid a price for your father’s pain.”
Ali didn’t know what that meant, but she decided it was time to come clean about everything. “I went to see Andrew Sloane.”
Gigi nodded. “I knew you would. You’re a sweet girl, trying to fix something that isn’t your responsibility to fix.”
“I should have told you and Digger before I went. I’m sorry. He’s not coming.”
“Andy is doing what he thinks is right. And he’s right about me. I failed Teddy, and not just because I bought him that boat.”
“I don’t understand.”
Gigi’s hand trembled as she smoothed Ali’s hair. “I should have forced Andy to train Teddy, but I didn’t, because I wanted to get along with Andy. Remember what we told you the night we started your training?”
“That an untrained Copycat is a dangerous thing?”
Gigi nodded. “Teddy was dangerous. What little he knew, he’d taught himself or learned from Digger, but Digger wasn’t as serious as he is now. He trusted Teddy would figure things out. I loved Teddy, but he was a terrible show-off. He tried to change as they went over the rapids and ended up overturning the boat. Digger was fine; he changed into a fish and swam for shore. But Teddy didn’t have Digger’s abilities. . . . Later, when Andy blamed Digger for Teddy’s death, I lost my temper and blamed Andy. I told him that his pigheadedness about Copycats had killed his son. That was unfair. He never spoke to me again.”
“It was an accident, Gigi.”
“It was. And instead of coming together as a family, we blamed ourselves and one another. Teddy would be so disappointed in us. Does Digger know you went to see Andy?”
“Yes.”
“How did he take it?”
“Okay, I guess. And even though he knows they won’t come, he invited the Other Sloanes.”
“That’s my Digger. Thank you for trying, Alison. You did your best. That’s all any of us can do.”
“What am I going to do about everything else? Should I call everyone and apologize?”
“Take your time. The history of this planet is people rushing to say and do things, when a day’s reflection would make all the difference. You don’t live to be my age and not realize that time is the great healer. Though not always. Sometimes, we have to heal ourselves.”
Gigi seemed to sense that Ali was confused. “Here’s what you’re going to do: don’t go to school tomorrow. Your problems will still be there on Monday, and sometimes taking a day to be nice to yourself is the best medicine. Besides, the house needs to be decorated.”
“What will people think if I quit debate team?”
“They’ll survive without you, especially if you’re as terrible as you say you are.”
“Gigi! But what if my quitting disappoints them?”
“You’ve spent your whole life trying not to disappoint anybody. Why don’t you try to not disappoint yourself and think about what you’d like to do? Once you do that, I promise that the right people will show up in your life and you’ll make real friends. Now, how about you go grab the Scrabble board? I feel like playing a game.”
ALI’S RULES FOR BEING HAPPY