Tim Myers is the New York Times-bestselling author of Berkley Prime Crime’s Lighthouse Inn Mystery series, featuring innkeeper Alex Winston and his replica of the Cape Hatteras Lighthouse nestled in the foothills of the Blue Ridge Mountains. Mr. Myers is the award-winning author of more than seventy short stories as well, and drew upon personal experience for his story to this volume, hastening to add that his research concerned being a stay-athome dad, and not a thief. To learn more about Mr. Myers and his work, go to www.timmyersfiction.com.
I love alarm systems, the more sophisticated the better. Well, that’s not strictly true. What I really love is getting around them. For me, part of the thrill of stealing is outsmarting the alarm companies and their laughable guarantees to keep people like me out.
As I worked my magic on the Watchdog 2010, a drop of sweat raced down my nose. Even though it was late, the humidity of summer was still thick in the air. I’d have to take Anna swimming tomorrow. I knew if I did, she’d want to invite one of her friends. She liked to do that more and more lately, and I’d been fighting the growing twinges of jealousy.
A light started flashing on the control panel in front of me that should have been dark, the rhythm speeding faster and faster. Okay, Chuck, focus on the task at hand. What happened? My mind raced over the schematics I’d pulled off the Internet, struggling to find out how I’d tripped the system. I could almost see the circuitry in my mind as I traced the path in my head.
Moving a few color-coded wires aside, I quickly saw the problem. I’d accidentally nicked one of the wires when I’d clipped in. From the look of it, I didn’t have long to fix the problem, or I was about to have an explosion of lights and sirens I couldn’t afford. Gently easing the split wire back together, I wrapped the break with a small bit of electrical tape. The light went off just as I did it! Whew, that had been too close.
Driving Anna from my mind, I concentrated on the task at hand.
There would be plenty of time for my daughter tomorrow.
Earlier that evening, I’d tucked her in, just as I’d done every night for the past seven years. Alone. Jenny had died in childbirth, and I’d buried my wife the day after I brought Anna home. Stealing was all I’d ever known, the only thing I’d ever been good at, and we always managed to get by, just the two of us.
“Do you have to go out tonight, Daddy?”
I brushed the long blonde hair out of my daughter’s face. “Don’t worry, sweetheart, Cindy’s just in the other room. I’ll be back before you wake up.”
“Sing to me again before you go,” she said.
I leaned forward and whispered a song. “You’re stalling again, you’re stalling again, good night my sweet Anna, good night my dear child.”
“Come on, Dad, I want a real song.”
I laughed as I tucked the covers under her chin. “You’ll just have to wait until tomorrow night. Now go to sleep.”
She was asleep before I got out of her room. Cindy was hitting the books at the dining room table when I walked in. “Chuck, I need to be home by midnight. I’ve got a huge final tomorrow.”
“I’ll be back in plenty of time, “I said as I started to walk out.
“If I have to sleep on the couch again, I’m going to double my rates,” she said with a smile.
“You’re a thief, you know that, don’t you?” I said with a smile.
“Hey, college isn’t cheap,” she said. “Besides, this is the end of my senior year. I’ve got bills to pay.”
As I got into my car, I felt the thrill of the hunt rush through me. Stealing wasn’t just a profession with me; it was an avocation.
My hands started to sweat as I grabbed the wheel, and it had nothing to do with the summer heat. I always got that way before a score, no matter what time of year it was.
As I coaxed the alarm into submission, I took a deep breath before heading for the safe. Stolen air smelled somehow better to me, as if I could taste the sweet oxygen around me. There was a richness that couldn’t be explained any other way.
The homeowner should have put less money in the alarm system and more into the type of safe he had. It was a Claxton 150, one of the first safes I’d learned to crack starting out. In just a little more time than it probably took him to open it, I was transferring the cash and jewelry from the heart of it into my fanny pack. I love fanny packs; they are absolutely perfect for the kinds of things I steal, tucked close in case I need to get away fast.
It was time to go, but I have one weakness that I can’t seem to break. Creeping into the library, I scanned the titles, searching for a book small enough to fit into my pouch. Every house I visit, I take a little token from their shelves for my own.
As I raced through the titles, something caught my eye. I pushed the light back, and sure enough, there it was. A first edition Poe! What was it doing hiding in the stacks though? I chuckled as I pulled the book down, smelling the richness of the old leather binding. This particular purloined letter was going home with me.
As I zipped my pack shut, I caught a glimpse of a stuffed animal, a copy of the original Winnie-the-Pooh used to illustrate the books. I’d read about the battle between countries for the original, but I thought Anna might like it, so I grabbed it, too. No room in my pouch, so I tucked Pooh under my arm.
That’s when the overhead lights came on.
Cindy and I have a nice working relationship, and Anna has a dream that someday we’ll all be together. How do you explain to your child that even though Cindy appears to be old enough to her, she’s just a child herself to me? I dated enough, but the women rarely made it to the point where they got to meet Anna. It was just too hard for her to say good-bye. A part of me knew my daughter needed a mother, but I couldn’t get serious about anyone. For me, Jenny was it, and I had just about accepted the fact that I was one of those odd birds, a swan mated for life whose spouse was gone.
But it was tough telling Anna all that without sounding like a real sap.
He was holding a revolver aimed right at my heart. Why do these guys always have weapons? Is it some kind of inferiority complex?
“What do you want?” he asked, his hand shaking more than I liked.
“Listen, stay calm. Nobody’s going to get hurt.” Brave words indeed, since I didn’t trust him not to pull the trigger. I never robbed a place armed. In the first place, I hated guns. That’s what happens after you’ve been shot a couple of times. Okay, some people say it’s an expected risk from the business I’m in, but even a nick hurts like the devil. Too, armed robbery is a whole different ball game.
His voice shaking, he said, “Who sent you? You can tell Bruno he’ll get his share of the money.”
Was this guy on drugs? Clearly he was shaken about something, but what? I had nothing to lose, so I decided to play along. “Yeah, well Bruno’s not so sure. He wants a little collateral.”
“More,” the man said, almost crying. “The bastard’s got my dog. What else does he want?”
So Bruno was a dognapper. I didn’t even want to know what was going on between them. I hid Pooh’s body with my arm. I didn’t want this guy to know I’d stolen it. I was kind of embarrassed about it, to be honest.
Then I remembered the book. I started to unzip the bag, and I saw the guy’s finger go white on the trigger. “Hold on!” I shouted. “You asked me what he was after, and I’m going to show you.”
I gently pulled the book out and showed him the Poe.
The relief on his face was obvious. “You don’t seem too upset about it,” I said.
“It’s insured,” the guy said, and his finger eased off the trigger. “No big deal. What else do you have in that bag?” As he asked it, he eased up on the trigger, and the gun moved to one side. We were making real progress now. Funny thing, though. As he lowered the gun, I could see the safety was still on. Believe me, all it takes are a couple of hits to learn when another one might be coming.
I jammed the book back into my pouch and headed for the door.
Was I right, though? Could the safety have been off after all? I braced myself for an explosion as I hurried off, but thankfully, none came.
“Bruno isn’t going to like this,” I said as I took off into the night.
I was almost to my car when the alarm went off. At least he’d given me time to get away. But boy, he and Bruno were going to be at a whole new level of pissed when they found out what I’d done. Not that it mattered to me. I’d be out of their lives forever.
Cindy was asleep on the couch when I got home. I thought about waking her, but I really didn’t mind the double time, not with the score I’d just made. She was pretty, especially when she slept, but she was still just a kid, nearly ten years younger than me. I covered her with a blanket, looked in on Anna and tucked Pooh in beside her, then stuffed my bag in a better safe than that of the guy I’d just robbed, before I went to bed.
“Come on, Dad, wake up.” I looked up blearily to find Anna at the foot of my bed. She had Pooh in one hand.
As I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes, I said, “Morning, sunshine. You like your present?”
She threw Pooh on the bed. “Please, Dad, I outgrew Pooh ages ago. He can sleep with you if you want.”
I pulled on a robe as I said, “We’re both offended.”
Cindy popped in the door. “Are you decent?” she called.
“Come on in,” I said.
“It’s double time again, Chuck,” she said with a smile. Then her eyes caught Pooh. “How precious,” she squealed. That alone told me Cindy was way too young for me.
“Miss Anna doesn’t like him. Why don’t you consider him a bonus?”
“I’d love to have him,” she said as I got my wallet and paid her. Still clutching Pooh, Cindy said, “Would you like me to drop Anna off at school? It’s not a problem; it’s on my way.”
“No thanks. Good luck on your final.”
She grinned. “I’m going to ace it. After all, I’ve got my good luck bear now.”
After Cindy was gone, Anna asked, “So, did you like your note?”
I asked, “What note?”
“The one I tucked in your pocket last night. I was pretty sly, wasn’t I?”
I grabbed for my pants, but there wasn’t any note there. “Which pocket did you put it in, sweetheart?”
“The one on your shirt,” she said. “You couldn’t tell?”
“No, babe, you fooled me.” I grabbed my shirt with relief, but it was quickly gone. There was no note there, either.
I had a sinking feeling I knew exactly where the note was.
“Honey, I lost it. Can you tell me what it said? Exactly word-for-word?”
I tried to keep the creeping fear out of my voice as I asked. I hadn’t touched it, so there couldn’t be fingerprints, at least not any the cops could trace. So that left the words.
She thought a minute, then said, “It said, ‘Dad, I love you. Kiss me good night.’ You didn’t, did you?”
I kissed her again. “I didn’t need a note to remind me. I kissed you anyway.” There was no way I could be traced back to it.
I glanced at the alarm clock. “You need to get ready for school.”
“Come on, Dad, let me play hooky. School’s almost over.”
I said, “You have a test today, young lady. Now scoot. I’ll be ready in a minute to drive you.”
I grabbed a quick cup of coffee from the auto-set coffeepot and managed to get Anna to school two minutes before the bell rang.
As I drove back home, the flutterings came back in the pit of my stomach. Stealing was one of the best parts, but I loved going through my take the next day nearly as much.
I opened the door and walked in. A thug was standing just inside, and I noted quickly that he had no confusion about the safety on his gun at all.
So Bruno had managed to track me down after all.
I held up my hands. “Can I help you?” I said as calmly as I could. “I don’t have much, but you’re welcome to what I’ve got.”
The thug said, “Cute, real cute. Give it to me, smart guy.”
I said, “I take it you are Bruno.”
“Who I am isn’t all that important. Just grab the stuff you took from Jenkins, and we’ll be done here.”
“I don’t suppose playing dumb is going to work, is it?”
He held up a piece of paper and said, “It was mighty nice of you to leave a calling card behind.”
With a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach, I saw that Anna had used my stationery to write me the note. A woman I’d been dating around Christmas one year had thought it was cute to give me fancy stationery. The only problem was that it had my name and address at the top of it. I’d given it to Anna to draw on.
“Okay, it’s all in the other room.”
We went to my safe in the floor, and I started to work the combination. Bruno crept up beside me and said, “Not so fast. You have a gun in there, you’re never going to get it out in time.”
It took me two tries to open my own safe, but in my defense, there was a gun jammed in the back of my neck. I was still embarrassed about it, professional standards and all.
I carefully handed Bruno the swag I’d worked so hard for. He didn’t even care about the book, tossing it aside onto the bed. As the money floated down beside it and the jewelry landed in a noisy clunk, Bruno said, “Very funny. Now where is it?”
Now I was the one in shock. “It’s all there, everything I took last night.”
The gun jammed harder into my skin. “You’d better be lying. Jenkins told me you had it.”
“I’m not in the habit of lying to men with guns in their hands. Jenkins is trying to double-cross you.”
“Listen, I’ve had enough of this, Charles. Give me the bear.”
“You want Pooh?” I said incredulously.
“That’s where the diamonds are,” Bruno said. “I already wrecked your kid’s room, and it wasn’t there. Are we going to have to go to school for show-and-tell?”
My daughter had never been a part of what I did. She only knew that her old man slipped out at night now and then. And now this thug wanted to go to her school.
“She doesn’t have it,” I said earnestly.
“Charles, you’ve just told your last lie.”
Not by a long shot. “I didn’t grab Pooh for her. I gave it to my girlfriend.”
“You’re a busy guy, Charles.”
“It’s Chuck,” I said, annoyed by him using my real name.
“So where is this mysterious girlfriend?”
“She lives off campus; she’s in college. I can take you to her.”
“Like ’em young, do you? Let’s go.”
I grabbed for the telephone first. ‘‘I’d better call ahead.”
Bruno knocked the telephone out of my hand. “I don’t think so. Let’s surprise her.”
I just prayed that Cindy and her roommates would be gone. The faster I got Bruno off my back, the better the chances for my survival.
Just my luck. Cindy was still there.
“Chuck, what’s going on?” She eyed Bruno suspiciously as he stood behind me.
“Anna changed her mind. She’d like Pooh after all.”
“Ask us in,” Bruno said.
Cindy didn’t catch the menace in his voice. She couldn’t have, not by the way she blew him off.
“In your dreams,” she said. “Taffy’s not dressed. Hang on a second, I’ll go get Pooh.”
As we stood in the hallway, Bruno said, “I don’t like this, Charles.”
“It’s Chuck,” I said again automatically.
“It’s going to be ‘dead’ if she doesn’t bring me that bear.”
A couple minutes later, Cindy came to the door carrying Pooh. “Sorry, I got a phone call. Here’s the bear.”
I reached for it, but Bruno grabbed Pooh before I could. “Thanks,” he said.
“Everything all right, Chuck?” Cindy asked.
“Yeah, it’ll be fine. Sorry about this.”
“Not a problem,” she said.
As soon as the door closed, Bruno tore Pooh’s head off. “The diamonds aren’t here,” he snarled.
“Then Jenkins ripped you off, and he’s blaming me. I grabbed the bear for my kid. When she didn’t want it, I gave it to Cindy.”
Bruno scowled a second, then said, “I thought this whole bear thing was a load of crap. I’m going to kill Jenkins.”
“I don’t blame you a bit,” I said. “I’d go after him, too.”
“Not so fast. I just can’t—”
“What am I going to do, call the cops? He’s the one you want.”
Bruno nodded. “Yeah, you’re right.” He grinned. “Tell you what. Why don’t you keep all that other crap you stole from him? The mook deserves it.”
“Thanks, Bruno,” I said as sincerely as I could.
He started down the stairs, Pooh’s body in one hand and his head in the other.
As soon as he was gone, Cindy opened the door and pulled me inside.
“That was close,” she said. “I thought you’d had it.”
“You heard what happened?” My cover was blown. There was no way Cindy would keep babysitting for me after finding out I was a thief. Anna was going to kill me.
“Chuck, the walls are so thin around here you can hear yourself think.”
“Listen, I’m sorry about all this,” I tried to explain as she put a finger to my lips.
“You don’t have to apologize. I just have one question for you. How are we going to fence these?”
Then she showed me a handful of glittering stones. “That’s what took me so long. I knew something was wrong, and it only took a second to find the diamonds sewn in Pooh’s head. I had a devil of a time finding a needle and thread to sew him back up, though.”
“So you don’t mind what I do?” I said, staring unbelieving at the diamonds.
“Mind? I’ve been trying to tell you for the past year. I’d like to join you. What do you say, partner?”
‘Td say you’ve got yourself a deal, my friend.”
Then she slid into my arms, and it felt like the most natural thing in the world. “That’s another thing I’ve been meaning to talk to you about.”
As we kissed, I almost forgot about the diamonds still clutched in her hand.
Almost.