CHAPTER TEN 

Hailey unconsciously balled the green trim of her practice jersey into her fist as she carefully watched Nora eyeing Grant through the rearview mirror from the passenger’s side. Jack had one hand on the wheel and one eyebrow raised, as he seemed too to be stealing glances in the rearview mirror, watching Hailey fidget nervously.

They were on their way to the only doctor’s office in Hope Hull. Grant and Hailey were still wearing their practice clothes from that morning’s workout that ended abruptly when Grant passed out again.

They were in the middle of team practice, doing a fast-paced lay-up drill when Hailey heard the terrifying thud. She choked back her tears, trying her best to think positive thoughts as she watched, in what seemed like slow motion, as her father knelt down over Grant, calling his name. As he came to, Hailey knelt down next to him, taking his hand as he stared up at her with glassy eyes.

Despite their dismissal, the team remained in a half-circle, staring down at their fallen point guard. Grant’s face was pale, his mouth was slightly open, and his hand gripped Hailey’s. Hailey saw the fear in his eyes; it had only come in a flash, but it was enough to make her mind race with thoughts of the unthinkable.

Nora arrived in a panic after a phone call from Jack, the way Grant knew she would. Despite his insistence that he felt better, his mother, not surprisingly, sided with Jack and agreed that they needed to pay Dr. Mason a visit.

“You really just passed out on the court in the middle of practice?” Nora blurted, finally turning around in her seat to face the kids. “Did you feel it coming? Were you feeling sick? Could you not have sat down and taken a break? That is just so scary to me, Grant! I saw a story on the news once about a basketball player who collapsed on the court…it turned out he had a heart condition nobody knew about! And he died!”

“Mom, you’re being dramatic,” Grant groaned.

“I don’t think she’s being dramatic at all,” Hailey declared.

“Well, I’m not dead!” Grant raised his arms. “Ticker feels good,” he patted his chest.

Hailey rolled her eyes.

Jack reached over and rubbed Nora’s arm consolingly. “We’re gonna get him checked out, Nora Jean. Doc Mason is a great doctor, just like his daddy was and his granddaddy before that. Do you remember going to Dr. Mason’s office when we were kids?”

Nora laughed. “You know good and well I never went to the doctor, Jack! With all of Granny’s home remedies, I stayed healthy as a horse.”

Jack chuckled. “I was sad to see old Doc Mason retire, but I always knew Doc Junior would turn out just like his daddy. Didn’t you always reckon he would turn out to be a doctor, even when we were in school?”

“Well, he was a few years behind us, but I do remember he was always smart,” Nora nodded.

As Jack pulled into the small parking lot next to a truck that everyone knew to belong to Rusty Cobb, Grant stared out the window at a sign that read, HOPE HULL PHYSICANS GROUP.

“How does a single doctor practice qualify as a group?” Grant snarled.

“I’m sure they just never changed the name after Doc Senior retired,” Nora said confidently, trying hard to deflect Grant’s cynicism.

“I don’t care how many doctors there are,” Grant crossed his arms, determined not to budge from his seat. “I’m not interested in visiting a doctor who can’t even correctly spell physician. Look at that sign! I’d prefer my physicians to have both I’s, if you don’t mind.”

“What?” Nora gasped.

“It’s spelled wrong!” Grant exhaled as Hailey giggled.

“Oh, Sweetheart, I bet nobody has ever noticed that in all these years,” Nora sighed.

“I sure haven’t,” Jack chuckled disbelievingly.

“You should tell Doc Junior, Grant; I know he’d want to get it fixed,” Nora suggested.

“I won’t be telling him anything because I am not going in there,” Grant mumbled.

“Yes, you are,” Hailey nodded.

Grant snarled. “Babe, I don’t know where this third-generation, small town, medicine man earned his doctorate, or if one is even required in order to practice in a town where the townsfolk already refer to you as Doc Junior in elementary school, but I am fairly certain that I’m more qualified to treat patients after a good game of Operation than this joker is.”

Hailey turned her head and rolled her eyes.

Grant shrugged. “Does anyone find it as unnerving as I do that doctors call what they do practice?”

“Grant, stop stalling and get out of the car,” Nora insisted. “It won’t hurt to have Dr. Mason take a look at you. You passed out and fell on the floor, Baby! You have to see the doctor!”

“It was a one time thing,” Grant huffed. “I feel fine now! I didn’t eat breakfast. I didn’t drink any water before practice. It’s not a big deal.”

Hailey bit her lip, knowing that Grant was about to be upset with her. “Well, for all your talk of spelling and degrees, you’d think a guy as intelligent as you would at least be able to count! This isn’t the first time this has happened, and you know it!” she accused.

“Dang it, Hailey,” Grant exhaled.

“What?” Nora gasped.

Jack spun around, his eyebrow raised.

“During the fire at Maude’s!” Hailey blurted. “His nose started bleeding, and he passed out.”

“I didn’t pass out,” Grant argued. “I just blacked out a little bit.”

“You passed out!” Hailey yelled.

“Why are you just now telling us this?” Jack scolded.

Hailey shrugged. “He made me promise…”

Grant opened the car door and slid out. He stared at Hailey, who was still in her seat, and slammed the door.

Hailey pushed the door open in a huff and slid out on Grant’s side. “At least I’m not a liar!” she said through clinched teeth.

“Loose lips sink ships,” Grant said coldly.

Grant examined the tiny two-room doctor’s office, housed in a white shed with chipped paint and a sign that he figured the first Doc Mason must have painted himself about a hundred years earlier. “And, I’m gonna die,” he nodded confidently as he started toward the door.

When Grant and his entourage walked inside, Misty was behind the reception desk, wearing blue jeans and a green Hope Hull Basketball hoodie. She worked as Paul’s dad’s receptionist during breaks from school to make a little pocket money. “Grant, are you okay?” she exclaimed. “Paul called and told us you passed out again!”

Nora’s face contorted. “Was I the only one who didn’t know?”

Rusty Cobb was walking out of the exam room with Dr. Mason.

Grant flopped down in a wooden chair in the waiting room between two mismatched end tables, one containing a copy of Good Housekeeping circa 1988 and the other a brown, drooping potted plant. Grant frowned at Hailey, jerking his head toward the forgotten décor. “Call me paranoid, but I have a funny little rule about not going to doctors whose office plants have died!”

“I want to call you a lot of things right now,” Hailey rolled her eyes.

“Grant, did you see my finger?” Rusty called as he bounded over, proudly displaying his bandaged hand. “Took a nail right through the middle finger. Man, I’ll tell you it hurt like the dickens!”

A plethora of possible responses danced around in Grant’s head, many of which seemed too good to pass up, but he just wasn’t in the mood. After an interior monologue during which he decided to forgo the joke, Grant intended to respond with something short and just polite enough, but he never got around to it.

Hailey, after shooting Grant a look of strong disapproval, smiled sympathetically at Rusty. “That’s awful, Rusty! I hope Dr. Mason got you taken care of.”

“He did,” Rusty assured her. “He got it all cleaned up and told me what to take for the pain. I’ll be fine, Darlin’.” Rusty glanced over at Grant. “What about him? I heard our star player is gettin’ sick on us right here about time for the playoffs.”

“He’ll be okay,” Hailey smiled. “He’s pretty tough.”

“I’m not sick,” Grant grumbled stubbornly.

“Rusty, get on out of here, so Doc Mason can see Grant before the seniors start coming in for their weeklies,” Misty called from behind the desk.

Dr. Mason shook Rusty’s good hand. “Give me a call if you have any troubles, Rusty. Misty will mark you down for a follow-up.” Then Dr. Mason put his hand on Nora’s shoulder. “Nora Jean, it sure is good having you back around here. I haven’t seen Jack this happy in a long time.”

“What do you know?” Grant nodded. “Suddenly I do feel a little sick.”

“It’s been good to be home, Doc,” Nora said cordially.

“Grant,” Dr. Mason called, “let’s get you in here and take a look at you.”

Ten minutes later, Grant and Dr. Mason walked back out into the waiting room. Nora, Jack and Hailey all stood at once.

“It seems to me he’s about over that cold,” Dr. Mason said, taking off his glasses and sliding them into the pocket of the while lab coat he wore over his flannel button-down. “I gave him a full physical, and he seems healthy as he can be.”

“With all due respect, Doc,” Jack frowned, “healthy eighteen-year-old boys don’t just collapse on the basketball court.”

“And this wasn’t the first time!” Nora added. “Did his heart sound okay?”

“His heart sounds good,” Dr. Mason nodded.

“If it isn’t his heart, what else could it be?” Jack asked. “Blood sugar maybe?”

“I was going to recommend that he has some blood tests done to give everyone peace of mind,” Dr. Mason agreed. “I can order the blood tests, but you’ll have to take him to the lab in Memphis for those.”

“Okay,” Jack nodded. “Is that the next step? Is there anything we should do in the meantime? No basketball, I’m assuming?”

Dr. Mason shrugged. “I think if he feels like playing, he can play. We have some big games coming up after the Christmas break. I know he doesn’t want to miss those, and, right now, I don’t see a reason for him to.”

“When can we get an appointment in Memphis?” Nora asked.

“I’ll tell you what,” Dr. Mason said, walking toward the reception desk. “You go on and take him home to rest. I’ll make some phone calls and let you know.”

“Thank you, Doc,” Jack said, shaking the doctor’s hand. “We’ll be waiting for your call.”

Nora twisted the phone cord around her finger as she listened to Randy’s rant. “I understand that, Randy,” she finally said exasperatedly. “I am just trying to offer the best possible solution for everyone here. I understand this is not what we had discussed, but, at the time, I had no idea that Grant was going to have a doctor’s appointment on Christmas Eve Eve.”

“The 23rd, Nora,” Randy scoffed. “Let me talk to Grant.”

“He’s asleep,” Nora replied calmly.

“In the middle of the day?” Randy barked back.

“He needed a nap,” Nora sighed.

“So basically our son is sick, and that hick town doctor couldn’t tell you anything? Did he do any testing at all?” Randy snarled.

“Like I told you, he suggested further testing,” Nora replied. “I talked to Joanna earlier, and she was looking online. She thinks it could be Mono or that he could be anemic. I’m really worried, Randy.”

“Jo is a lawyer, Nora; can we not get our son to a real doctor?” Randy said gruffly. “Bring him here, and I’ll take him to the doctor.”

“He’s going to the doctor on the 23rd,” Nora repeated. “Like I said, he has an appointment in Memphis. If you would like to be here, I would like for you to be. If you are too uncomfortable with the idea of spending Christmas in Hope Hull, then you will be the first person I call when we leave the doctor’s office.”

“I wanted you and Grant and Emily to spend Christmas here…with our family,” Randy sighed.

“Randy,” Nora barked back, “I told you….Grant has basketball practice; Emily is in the Christmas program at the church; Grant wants to spend Christmas with Hailey, and now this doctor’s appointment has popped up.”

Randy went on as though he had not heard her. “We can watch Leah open her presents on Christmas morning. Emily can be with Rachel. You can make Jo those gingerbread cookies she loved on Christmas mornings when she was at kid. We can have pigs-in-a-blanket like you always make. I put the lights up outside the house, those big colored bulbs like you like, and I lined our walkway with our toy soldiers, just the way you like it.”

Nora imagined Randy spending hours decorating their house, then flipping the switch and walking down the drive to view the spectacle that would welcome his family home. She smiled as she brought her hand to her heart. “Aww, Randy…I don’t know what to say…”

Randy swallowed. “I thought that on Christmas Eve we would all go to the cemetery and put some poinsettias on Ike’s grave.” He paused, recalling past Christmases. “The kids used to write him letters on his birthday and at Christmas…I don’t know why they ever stopped.”

“Sweetheart,” Nora sighed.

“I know, we talked about this last year,” Randy conceded. “You think it’s good, in a way, that the children have healed and moved on…”

“It doesn’t mean they have forgotten him or that they love him any less,” Nora teared up.

“Nora, don’t cry,” Randy gulped. “Don’t cry when I’m not there to hold you.”

Nora nodded. “I know that Ike is in Heaven with Jesus, and that he is safe and taken care of and happy and never hurting and never sad… but I just miss him…”

“Why do they say that time heals? Why do they all tell you that?” Randy snapped. “It doesn’t heal…the hurt never goes away…at times it is as raw as it was that day…and, honestly, I hope it always stays that way for me! I never want the hurt to go away! I can accept that he is gone; I can accept that God was in control that day, but I want to hurt every day of my life because that is how much I loved him.”

Nora felt her body tremble. Despite everything that had happened between her and her husband, he was still that…her husband, her life partner, the father of her children, the person who knew her best, the man with whom she had spent her happiest days and her saddest moments. He was the one whom she had vowed to love forever in good times and bad. He was the one with whom she had jumped up and down the day she found out they were expecting their first child. He was the one she stayed up at night worried sick about when he was deployed. He was the one whose eyes beamed with pride the day their youngest son joined the family that they had long since thought to be complete. He was the one who stood taller than the rest of the fathers at West Point’s graduation ceremony, the year that his oldest son joined the family ranks. He was the one who kept her sane as the details of her teenage daughter’s rape and resulting pregnancy tested her faith and her resolve. He was the one who had held her on the night their world fell apart, the one whose arms remained strong enough to hold her despite the fact that he too was crumbling. He was her soul mate and the only man in the world she could imagine forgiving after he’d hurt her so deeply.

“Randy, I know it is a lot to ask,” Nora cried, “but, please, consider coming to Tennessee for Christmas. I know that everyone just came for Thanksgiving, and that it’s not fair to ask you or the kids to come to us again…”

“I’ll ask them,” Randy said matter-of-factly.

Nora was shocked. She was certainly pleased by his willingness to adhere to her request, but she was unprepared for the lack of resistance. There was a long pause, simply because she had been prepared to argue with him about Jack’s presence in their lives. Finally, she said, “I think you should come with me to Grant’s doctor’s appointment. Call it mother’s intuition or just me being a worrywart, but I’m really concerned about him, Randy.”

“Okay, then I’ll be there,” Randy agreed. “I’m looking at flights as we speak.”

“Nora?” Hailey called from down the hallway. “I think Grant’s running a fever. Can you check the thermometer?”

“Randy,” Nora said into the phone, “I better go. I need to check on Grant.”

“Alright,” Randy sighed, “I’ll try to talk the kids into coming with me, but, either way, I’ll see you soon.”

“Okay,” Nora agreed, her gratitude ringing in that single word.

“But I’m not staying at his house!” Randy added.

“Thank you for doing this,” Nora said softly. She started to say goodbye, but, instead, she began to cry again. “Maybe after Grant’s appointment, we can fly back and spend Christmas in North Carolina and go visit the cemetery.”

“I’d like that,” Randy replied simply. “I love you, Nora,” he said, hanging up the phone, knowing it would be easier to let those words linger than to wait for her reply or lack thereof.

The mall in Memphis was decorated marvelously for Christmas as Nora and the girls strolled through the holiday crowd. There were bows on all the columns; the store windows were trimmed in holiday cheer, and small children stood in line with their parents, waiting for their turn to talk to Santa.

“Leah, do you want to sit on Santa’s lap?” Nora pointed as Leah peered through the miniature white picket fence around a splendid Christmas tree display.

Leah giggled as she reached her hands up to her mother.

“I think that means, not a chance!” Joanna laughed.

“Mom, take a picture of me and Em in front of the tree,” Rachel said, digging for her digital camera.

Emily put her hand on the small pooch of Rachel’s tummy. “With the baby!” she grinned.

“That’s a good one!” Rachel exclaimed, as she showed Emily the resulting picture on the camera’s display screen. “You’re so beautiful, Em! This is going to be my new profile picture on my Facebook page!”

Nora took pictures of all the girls in various poses in front of the Christmas displays: Hailey, Emily and Jessica as Charlie’s Angels in front of the tree; Leah reaching for the shiny silver balls; all the girls gathered around a giant statue of Frosty; Jessica striking a pose in front of a giant box wrapped in metallic red paper and topped with a flowing green bow; Leah grinning as she placed her hands on Melissa’s cheeks; Jessica and Emily next to a candy cane, sticking their tongues out, making silly faces.

They laughed and cut-up as they joined hands to keep from getting separated in the crowd. Nora bought them all pieces of fudge and divinity, and they squealed with excitement as they savored the sweet flavors.

Hailey let out a startled yelp as she was wrapped up from behind. “Excuse me, Miss, are you from Tennessee?” asked the most intentionally bad southern accent she had ever heard.

“Yes, Sir, I am,” she winked at her friends without even turning her head.

“You must be because you’re the only Ten I See.” Grant kissed her cheek.

Hailey laughed as she turned around and kissed him back. “Hi, Silly! What did you do with the rest of the guys?”

“I ditched them,” Grant shrugged. “Your dad and my dad started throwing punches out in front of American Eagle, and I bolted.”

“Grant,” Joanna snickered. “Certain situations are awkward enough without any assistance, don’t you think?”

“Joey, just the girl I was looking for; I found something I need you to buy me!” Grant exclaimed.

“I called Santa,” Joanna quipped. “You didn’t make the good list again this year…imagine that!”

“That has got to be a mistake,” Grant shook his head.

“Grant, you and Hailey go stand in front of the Christmas tree and let me take your picture,” Nora wagged her finger in the air, gesturing toward the tree.

“Photoshoot!” Jessica exclaimed.

Grant and Hailey stood in front of the tree. He put his arm around her, and Hailey placed her hand lovingly against his chest. They both smiled broadly.

“Could they be any cuter?” Melissa nudged Joanna.

“Grant, put her on your back for a picture!” Jessica instructed.

Grant stooped down, so Hailey could reach his shoulders, and she hoisted herself onto his back. Grant bounced her around playfully. “Be still, so your mom can take the picture,” Hailey giggled as she slapped him. She wrapped her arms around Grant’s neck, placing her face right up against his as Nora snapped the picture.

Rachel turned to Emily and Jessica. “So do y’all think he’ll marry her?” she asked.

“I think they talk about it,” Jessica nodded gleefully.

“Do you see him?” Emily pointed. “That’s Grant! Smiling, happy…genuinely enjoying the presence of another person! Enough said, right?”

“I’ve never seen him this happy,” Melissa agreed.

Hailey slid off of Grant’s back. “I should make you carry me around the whole mall like that!” she joked.

“Do a kissing one!” Nora called.

Hailey laughed, embarrassed and shaking her head as she buried her face in Grant’s chest. “Take that one…take that one, Mom,” Rachel laughed, as Grant looked down at Hailey, grinning.

“We’re in the middle of a mall, Mom!” Grant exclaimed. “I’m not mackin’ on my girlfriend as part of some live window display!”

“He’s not what?” Nora asked.

The girls giggled.

“Just kiss her once,” Nora persisted.

Hailey stood on her tiptoes and puckered her lips. Grant pecked her lips much too quickly for the camera to capture. Then, knowing his mother would have them stage the kiss again, he decided it would be fun to play along. “Lift one leg off the ground like the girls in the movies do to indicate it’s true love,” he instructed Hailey. “I’m gonna do it to.”

Grant’s sisters, as well as passing onlookers, laughed with delight as Nora snapped the picture.

“Come here, Princess Leah,” Grant knelt down and opened his arms. “Come take a picture with me and Aunt Hailey!”

“Well, there’s your answer I guess!” Jessica nudged Rachel.

“Look how sweet,” Melissa gasped as Leah ran into Grant’s arms. He turned her around to face the camera as Hailey knelt down and put her arms around both of them. “Oh my goodness, I want that in a frame,” Melissa cried.

Joanna put her arm around her sister-in-law. “You okay, Mom?” she smiled.

“Yes,” Melissa laughed as she wiped away her tears. “That was just so sweet! Leah loves her Uncle Grant! She was grinning like a little cheese ball!”

“Did everyone finish their shopping, so we can get out of here?” Randy bellowed above the crowd.

Nora laughed. “No, but we bought fudge! Can I interest you in any?”

Randy gestured above Nora’s head. “Are you aware you are standing beneath the mistletoe, Mrs. Cohen?”

Nora looked up and smiled despite herself. “And not a soul has walked by and tried to kiss me,” she declared with mock agitation.

“Kiss, I’ll take your picture,” Grant smiled devilishly.

Randy puckered his lips, and Nora turned away purposefully. “Let’s finish our shopping and get back to Hope Hull,” she declared, clapping her hands encouragingly. “I know everyone must be tired from the flight.”

“We’re going to the toy store,” Grant called as he held Leah in one arm and took Hailey’s hand with the other.

“And Old Navy,” Hailey grinned over her shoulder as he drug her away.

Despite splitting up, it was difficult for everyone not to keep running into each other in the mall. When Nora caught Jessica trying on an armload of clothes and modeling them one-by-one like a runway model in front of the dressing room mirror in the walkway between the stalls, she told her to pick her three favorite outfits and act surprised on Christmas morning. Jessica flung both arms around Nora’s neck, and it took her no time to pick three complete outfits for herself. Still, they spent half an hour in the dressing room with Jessica holding up tops saying, “wouldn’t this one look good on Hailey? I think this color would be perfect with Emily’s hair! I think I’ll get this one for Hailey because it would look so good with that blue shirt Grant has.”

David, Melissa and Leah, whom Grant had returned to them inside the Hallmark store where everyone seemed to have converged to pick up a gift for Granny Miller, ran into Grant again in the Nike store, or, better yet, followed him there and stalked him around the store until David finally quipped, “funny running into you here…see anything you like? What size shoe are you wearing these days?”

Grant reached for a box of tennis shoes. “I happen to know these fit perfectly and look rather nice.”

“Perfect,” David winked.

“And if you really love me, there is a gray hoodie over there with a crimson swoosh that screams late night study sessions at Harvard,” Grant shrugged.

David curled his lip. “I don’t think I love you that much, Bro!”

“Large,” Grant coughed.

“Well, if it’s for school,” Melissa conceded.

Grant patted David’s back as he kissed his cheek. “Thanks, Dave!” he called as he strolled out of the store, on a mission to find the perfect Christmas gift for Hailey.

Rachel and Wally oohed and aahed around the baby department, knowing they already had gifts in their suitcase that everyone was going to love! Wally and his band had finally finished their new album, and he had brought everyone their very own copy.

Jack kept running into his girls just long enough for them to hand him shopping bags to hold before disappearing again. He stood in a long line inside the music store with a stack of CDs off the list Jessica had made him as a romantic ballad by Celine Dion played over the loudspeaker. He wondered, not for the first time, if things wouldn’t have been easier if he had never run into Nora after all the years that had separated them. Her husband was back in town for another holiday and, if that wasn’t strange enough, Jack sensed for the first time that their living arrangement would soon come to its inevitable end. Though their shared childhood and teenage years would always guarantee Nora Jean Miller a special place in his heart, he had no doubt that their relationship would never mature beyond that of childhood sweethearts. Hailey and Jessica had been able to convince him to join them on this trip to Memphis, mainly because they knew it would be his last chance to fulfill their Christmas wishes before the big day. He had agreed, knowing that he did need to finish up some shopping. He had prepared himself to see Randy again; what he had not been quite as prepared for was the look in Nora’s eyes when Randy stepped off the plane. She didn’t run to him or hug him; she reserved that for her children and her granddaughter, but she seemed strangely relieved to have him there. Jack knew she was nervous about Grant’s doctor’s appointment the following day, and he imagined that was part of the reason she wanted Grant’s father close by, but there was more to it than that. It remained as it had always been; Nora had loved Randy the day she walked away from Jack, and her love for Randy now would be the reason she walked away from him again. Jack smiled to himself. He had been lucky enough to fall in love with a woman who took his name, and, though their time together was short-lived, she had given him the two most treasured gifts he could imagine. His girls were his whole life, and his role as a single father had been a fulfilling one. He glanced out the store window and watched Hailey pass by, holding the hand of Nora’s son, and he laughed out loud. Life is funny that way, he thought. The girl of his dreams had returned out of the blue, not to re-write the past between them, but because, he truly believed, her son and his daughter were meant to share the love and the life that he and Nora never had.

Loaded down with shopping bags, Nora sat down in the food court to check her list one more time. She glanced into one of her bags, and, seeing one of the shirts she had picked up for Randy, she nodded, telling herself that it would be okay if she just wrapped them up from Grant and Emily.

Nora glanced across the way and found herself staring at two light-up toy soldiers standing guard at the store entrance. She recalled past Christmases, and her head was filled with snapshots of fond Christmas memories…Randy dressed up as Santa Claus for a party on the base…Randy sitting in the floor with David in his arms on his first Christmas as a father…Randy running down the sidewalk along side Joanna on the Christmas she got her first bike…Randy, David and Ike hurling wadded-up pieces of wrapping paper at each other as they helped her clean up before Christmas brunch… Randy standing inside the church on Christmas Eve, the children gathered around him as he held baby Rachel in her poofy, red Christmas dress…Randy in the floor on Christmas morning, showing Grant how to line his Army men up to guard his fort the year he turned two…and, finally, Randy and sweet baby Emily both sound asleep next the Christmas tree after Christmas dinner.

Randy slid into the seat next to Nora in the food court and sat a small black box on the table in front of her, sliding it toward her when she didn’t immediately reach for it.

“Randy!” Nora shook her head. “What is this?”

“It’s Christmas,” Randy shrugged. “This is my way of saying Merry Christmas to the only woman I will ever love…the best mother my children could have asked for…and someone whom I hope will one day be able to forgive the man who was never good enough for her to start with.”

Nora slowly opened the box to reveal a gorgeous, heart-shaped diamond necklace.

“I know this can’t replace the heart I broke,” Randy gulped, “but I hope that every time you look it, you remember that, though mistakes were made, you were and are always loved.”

That evening everyone was gathered around the living room at Jack’s house; the Christmas tree lights were on, and the mood was relaxed and pleasant. As Nora sat a tray of Christmas cookies on the coffee table, things seemed to be going too eerily well, and her stomach churned, waiting for the rug to inevitably be ripped from underneath her.

“You know,” Randy was saying to Grant, “I could probably still talk to some people…”

“Dad,” Grant insisted, “Give up on West Point! Hailey and I have made our decision.”

“Hailey and I?” Randy scoffed.

“We made our decision,” Grant stuck to his guns.

“We?” Randy scoffed. “There you go again! You’ve got yourself a little girlfriend, so you can’t make a decision on your own now, Son? This is about you and your future!”

“There is a definite us to consider now,” Grant said confidently. “She didn’t make my decision, but we did make it together. When you love someone, you tend to make important decisions with the wellbeing of both in mind, Dad…you know…where to go to dinner…where to go to church…where to go to college…whether or not to have an adulterous affair with the neighbor girl…”

“Grant, that’s not necessary,” Nora sighed, glancing around embarrassed, hoping no one had heard him.

“The kid’s right, Nora,” Randy nodded. He stared at Grant. “I respect your decision.”

“Thank you,” Grant smiled cautiously. “And if Harvard doesn’t work out…I can always flip hamburgers at McDonald’s, huh?”

“Grant, don’t give the old man a heart attack,” David laughed.

“Harvard Law doesn’t sound like a bad goal to me,” Joanna smiled.

“I don’t know,” Grant shrugged. “I was considering studying political philosophy for undergrad…but you know, I do have a propensity for Japanese gardening…I have always been intrigued by the Bonsai tree.”

“Cute,” Randy nodded. “Please joke about it…it’s just your future we’re talking about after all!”

Grant shook his head. “Did I ever tell you about the most delightful peasants I met in Morocco? They turned me on to the fascinating art of basket weaving, and I was thinking that…”

Randy’s face turned bright red.

“Dad, just ignore him; that’s what the rest of us do,” Joanna laughed, winking at her baby brother.

Hailey walked into the room and picked up a cookie off the tray. “Baby, grab me one, please,” Grant called.

Hailey sat down in Grant’s lap with a napkin of cookies in hand. “Are you going snowflake or snowman?” she asked.

“I’m the man. You’re the flake,” Grant winked.

Hailey wrinkled her nose, pulling the napkin close to her. “I will be eating both of these, thank you very much,” she declared.

Grant kissed her cheek. “That’s okay,” he nibbled at her cheek with his lips. “You’re so sweet I don’t even need a cookie.”

“That’s good because you’re not getting one,” Hailey answered easily.

Grant smiled, resting his chin against her shoulder.

“Let’s play a family game,” Emily suggested.

“I’ve got a game,” Randy replied.

“Dad,” Grant groaned. “No.”

“What is it?” Hailey asked curiously.

“Dad,” Grant groaned again.

“I’m with Grant on this one, if we’re taking a vote,” David added.

“What sort of game is this that has the boys running scared?” Jessica asked eagerly. “Truth or Dare?”

“It’s called Name that Capital City,” Randy told her, ignoring Grant’s ongoing protest.

“Sounds hard,” Hailey smiled at Randy.

“Would you like to go first?” Randy asked her.

“Sure,” Hailey volunteered. “What do I have to do?”

“It’s easy,” Randy shrugged, “I name the country or the state, and you give me the capital city. You ready?”

Hailey nodded pleasantly.

“Okay,” Randy pointed at her. “Germany?”

“Berlin!” Hailey exclaimed excitedly.

“Nice,” Grant smiled as they shared a high-five.

“Still not getting a cookie,” Hailey whispered.

“That was an easy one!” Emily interjected.

“I didn’t know it until a few months ago when Grant taught me,” Hailey admitted with a laugh.

“Alright, you’re up, Grant,” Randy said as he rubbed his hands together eagerly.

“I don’t want to play,” Grant replied. “Was that not clear before?”

“Denmark?” Randy said without missing a beat.

Hailey turned her head to Grant, eager to hear his answer. “You don’t have to pretend to like this game to impress my dad,” he grumbled.

“I do like this game,” Hailey shrugged. “I’ve never played before.”

“That’s because normal kids don’t play Name that Capital City,” Grant snapped.

Hailey wrinkled her nose and fed Grant a bite of cookie. “Eat some sugar,” she rolled her eyes.

“Time is almost up,” Randy shrugged as he tapped his imaginary watch.

“Since when was there a time limit?” Grant stared at his father.

“I believe a time limit has been in place since the summer of 1983 when it took Rachel twenty-seven minutes to come up with Birmingham as the capital of Alabama,” David replied in a mock serious tone.

“I didn’t think Birmingham was the capital of Alabama,” Hailey replied.

“Hence the time limit,” Randy clapped his hands together and pointed at Grant. “Ten, nine, eight…”

“Seven, six, five…” Grant rolled his eyes.

“Grant, humor your daddy for a minute,” Nora pled.

“Copenhagen,” Grant rolled his eyes.

“Alright, Em,” Randy nodded as he pointed toward the chair where Emily was sitting Indian style, flipping through the pages of a magazine. “What is the capital of Vietnam?”

Emily thought for a moment as Randy awaited her answer. “Pass,” she sighed reluctantly, angry at herself for blanking on an answer she was sure she should have known. She turned to Jessica, and Jessica shrugged.

“Alright, David,” Randy said turning to his son who sat on the opposite end of the couch. “Vietnam?”

David chuckled. “Dad, when I agreed to this trip, I didn’t know I was going to get trapped into playing this old game!”

“In other words, he has no clue what the capital of Vietnam is,” Grant grinned at his brother. “Which is really sad when you think about it,” he added. “Perhaps you’ve heard stories of the war?”

“Grant?” Randy pointed.

“It’s Hanoi…but how did it get to be my turn again?” Grant shrugged. “I was enjoying watching David make a mockery of the value of a West Point education.”

“I knew the answer, Punk!” David protested.

Grant grinned, sensing his father’s agitation and his brother’s frustration. “You’re a disgrace of a namesake, a disgrace to your alma matter and a disgrace to your country,” Grant declared.

Randy laughed heartily.

“Hello?” David threw his arms up. “I have feelings here, you know, Dad?” He balled up a napkin and threw it at his brother. “I knew the answer, Grant! Don’t be a jerk!”

“My turn! My turn!” Hailey said excitedly when the game worked its way back around to her.

“Uruguay?” Randy fired at her, obviously impressed with her fresh enthusiasm for the game that was the nemesis of the kids who had endured endless hours trapped in the car with the general.

Hailey frowned.

“Oh, come-on, Dad! You finally found someone who enjoys your game, and you give her Uruguay?” Grant protested.

“May I use a lifeline?” Hailey smiled, and Randy actually laughed with delight.

“Of course,” he nodded.

“No fair,” Emily teased.

“Yeah, that was never allowed before,” David added.

“You never asked, Dummy,” Randy shrugged.

“I’d like to call my boyfriend,” Hailey announced matter-of-factly, with no less conviction than if she had been sitting across from Regis himself. She leaned over, and Grant whispered the answer in her ear.

“Are you lying to me to make me look silly?” Hailey grinned.

“No,” Grant smiled back.

“Say it again?” Hailey insisted as she leaned her ear closer to his lips. “Montevideo?” she repeated out loud.

Grant affirmed her pronunciation with a slight nod.

Hailey turned to Randy and said with absolute confidence, “I believe the capital of Uruguay is Montevideo.”

“Smart boyfriend,” Randy smiled.

“Everyone please amend your mental rulebooks to note that lifelines were just officially instated,” David grinned.

“Grant, what is the capital of Turkey?” Randy asked.

“It’s not my turn,” Grant shrugged. “I answered that one, so I get skipped this round.”

“Grant, what’s the capital of Turkey?” Randy asked again.

“Anyone want hot chocolate?” Nora suggested, standing.

“Me!” all the girls sang out at once.

“Okay then,” Nora smiled. “Joanna, will you give me a hand please, Sweetheart?”

“Grant?” Randy said sternly.

“Sure, I’ll take some hot chocolate, Dad,” Grant shot back. “Thanks for asking!”

“He doesn’t want to play, Randy,” Nora called nonchalantly.

“He’s just trying to make me angry,” Randy snapped back.

“May I use a lifeline?” Grant replied stubbornly.

“You are just full of laughs today, aren’t you?” Randy huffed.

“Dad, leave him alone,” David sighed.

“Have a cookie, Daddy,” Rachel offered.

“It would be totally funny if the capital of Turkey was like Cheese,” Wally snorted.

“Father of your grandchild,” Grant gestured with his head. “Safe to say, you have bigger problems than me, right?”

“What’s the answer?” Randy boomed.

“What happened to that time limit you guys put in place?” Melissa interjected as she cuddled Leah in her lap.

Grant laughed. “Cheese?” he suggested.

“No way?” Wally’s ears perked up eagerly.

“Is it Istanbul?” David asked.

Grant tapped Hailey’s leg, and she moved, so he could stand up. “It is not,” Grant replied factually. “However, as much as Dad would love for me to get into how, why and when that changed, I’m not in the mood.”

“You have always been moodier than a woman, Grant,” Rachel declared.

“Come get hot chocolate!” Nora called. “Who wants marshmallows?”

Suddenly the living room cleared, leaving only Randy and Jack sitting on opposite sides of the room. “It’s a defense mechanism,” Jack blurted.

“Oh is that so?” Randy nodded. “A defense against what? I didn’t realize you recognized any defenses other than zone and man to man, Jack.”

Jack ignored the insinuation and made his point. “I’m just saying…you can only push any kid so far before he starts pushing back, and that one pushes hard.”

“I don’t need any help handling my son, thank you,” Randy said sternly. “You’ve got two girls; how would you know the first thing about raising boys?”

Grant returned from the bedroom with a basketball in hand. “Coach, you up for a quick game?”

“Sure thing, Buddy, let me grab my jacket!” Jack said as he stood.

In the kitchen, Nora’s mind drifted back to a trip they had taken when Grant was about nine years old. She still remembered the red, handheld video game that he hadn’t put down since he had gotten it. Grant was playing his game, minding his own business, but there was something about being behind the wheel of a car for hours at a time that gave Randy an unquenchable urge to play everybody’s favorite game that was nobody’s favorite game: Name that Capital City. This particular trip Randy fired questions at Grant who answered them in a bored monotone without ever looking up from his game.

“What’s the capital of New York?”

“Albany.”

“How about Oklahoma?”

“Oklahoma City…duh.”

“New Hampshire?”

“Concord.”

“Alaska?”

“Juneau.” And then in an exhaled exclamation, “Yes! Mom, I made it to level ten!”

“California?” Randy changed lanes.

“In level ten you can…”

“I asked you a question, Soldier!”

“Huh?”

“Sir!” Randy barked.

“Sir?” Grant gulped.

“What is the capital of California?”

“I don’t want to play anymore,” came the bold reply.

“Answer me, or I’ll take that silly game of yours and toss it out the window,” Randy insisted.

Grant crossed his arms then, ready to play hardball. Nora recalled with an uncontrollable grin how Grant named practically every city in the state of California, but wouldn’t have said Sacramento if Randy had pulled off the side of the road and tried to beat it out of him.

With one hand on the wheel, Randy reached into the backseat and snatched Grant’s game with a quickness that made both she and Grant jump. Randy rolled down the window, so that the wind beat wildly inside the car. Nora turned to Grant. “Answer your father,” her eyes begged, but, somewhere in her face, she was sure Grant saw, “Mama will buy you another game if your crazy daddy chunks this harmless, twelve dollar and fifty-nine cent toy to the birds.”

“Santa Barbara,” Grant smiled with the purposeful grin that, of all of Nora’s kids, only he could have produced. Then he watched from the backseat as his favorite game tumbled into hundreds of pieces along a forgotten Kansas highway.

As Nora’s memory faded everyone had drifted back to the living room. The sound of Christmas carols playing softly on the radio was overridden by conversation, sporadic giggling, and, occasionally, by the sound of the whistle on the toy train which Leah watched go round and round the track.

Randy eyed the room, but he wasn’t seeing the lights or hearing the train whistle. All he could hear was the echo of Grant’s laughter as Jack Nelson pulled his baseball cap down over his eyes. He found himself wondering if Grant had ever laughed like that for him. Randy stared at Grant; he was dribbling an imaginary basketball between his legs, reenacting something off television. Jack said something to Grant, patted his shoulder, and they both laughed.

Nora sat on the arm of the couch next to Randy.

“Grant and Jack get along really well don’t they?” Randy sighed.

“Aren’t you thankful for that?” Nora replied. “I sure have been”

“Of course, Nora,” Randy barked, “I’m thrilled my son finally found the father he has always wanted!”

“Randy,” Nora sighed. “Don’t be ridiculous! You are Grant’s daddy, and he loves you! Jack and Grant spend a lot of time together; they’ve gotten close…Jack’s never had a son, so I think…”

“Yeah, well he can’t have mine,” Randy stated emphatically, as he sprung from his seat.

“Randy, what are you doing?” Nora exclaimed as she followed him. “Randy! Stop! Now! Please!”

“Grant,” Randy said sternly, “get your basketball…we’re going to play some one- -on-one in the driveway.”

“Yeah, that was what Jack and I were gonna do,” Grant laughed. “But there are too many cars in the driveway.”

“So, we’ll move them,” Randy insisted.

“There’s another goal out back at the barn,” Grant sighed, “but I really don’t feel like playing right now anyway.”

“Get the ball,” Randy demanded.

“Randy, didn’t you hear the kid?” Jack shrugged. “He’s not up to it.”

“This conversation doesn’t involve you, Jack,” Randy insisted.

“Yes it does,” Grant scoffed. “Of course it does! I was over here laughing and having a good time with Jack, and you got jealous and decided that, after eighteen years, you’d suggest a game of one-on-one. It doesn’t work like that, Dad.”

“Why don’t you want to play with your old man?” Randy asked exasperatedly.

“He doesn’t feel good, Randy,” Jack intervened.

“No, I don’t,” Grant groaned. “I’ve been getting really tired lately.”

“Alright,” Randy conceded, but he stared at Jack, unable to let it go. “He’s my son, and if I need your input, Coach, I’ll ask for it.” He snickered, determined to get in one more jab at his nemesis. “Besides, you should probably worry less about playing Super Dad to my kid and a pay a little more attention to your own.”

“Excuse me?” Jack fired back.

“What kind of a father lets his little girl play a very physical game with a bunch of hormonally charged high school boys?” Randy laughed. “That’s just begging her to become a little temptress who convinces young men with bright futures to give it all up to build their life around her.”

Jack took a deep breath. “What kind of a father lets his impressionable, teenage son walk in on him having sex with a stranger while he’s still married to his mother?”

Nora gasped, certain Jack was about to find himself flat on the floor. “You are both ruining Christmas!” she cried out.

Melissa stood to walk to the back of the house with Leah, who was squealing uncomfortably now. “David, do something,” she gulped.

“Nora and I don’t need you policing our sex life,” Randy scoffed, “but perhaps you should be a little more concerned with what is going on under your own roof. While you’re busy playing hero to your wounded ex-flame, chances are that your oldest daughter is not quite as innocent as she used to be, if you know what I mean!”

“Stop!” Grant screamed, barging between the two men. “Both of you, just stop!” He looked at his father and then at Jack. “Jack, just stay out of my family’s business,” he breathed. “I’m sorry they’re all here in your house, but you don’t know my dad well enough to criticize anything about him.” He was done with Jack, but he spun on his father, and the anger in his eyes reached a whole new level. “You know, Dad,” he screamed, staring at Randy, “you can say whatever you want to say about me. You can criticize me; you can judge me; you can demean me; you can accuse me; you can resent decisions I make…say what you want to say; do whatever you want to do, and I’ll stand here and take it…but you will never say another negative word about the girl I love, and I don’t care if you throw me through the wall right now for saying so.”

Hailey reached for Grant’s arm, her concern evident, but a distinct sense of pride filling her tone. “It’s okay; calm down.”

Grant let Hailey take his arm, but his eyes remained firmly fixed on his father’s. “I hated you,” Grant said boldly. “I hated you for hurting my mother. I hated you for destroying our family. I hated you for being so disappointed in me without ever taking a second to try and understand me. I hated you for always wanting me to be the son you lost. But, Dad, everything that you did, everything that happened, led me right here…to her…and she saved me from myself….and from you. If anything…you should thank her…because she is the reason I even want to try and understand you.”

The room fell completely void of voice or movement. Grant took a deep breath. “For the record, I don’t hate you. I love you…I admire you…and I’m proud to be the son of the hardest working, most forward thinking and heroic public servant I know.” He looked around at everyone who stood staring back at him, then his eyes moved back to his father. He pulled Hailey close to his side and shifted his glance purposefully to Jack. “For anybody keeping notes during this whole shameful display,” Grant said, his teeth clinched, “I should address the subject that was inappropriately placed into question and mention that your daughter’s virginity remains intact.”

“Oh…my…Heaven, help me,” Hailey exhaled, weak-kneed as she buried her head into Grant’s side and covered her face with her hands.

Grant turned to walk away, with Hailey tucked under his arm. A few steps later, as he reached the front door, he turned around. “And the capital city of Turkey is Ankara,” he said as he slammed the door behind him.

David, his mouth still open, turned to Joanna. “Wow,” he mouthed to his sister.

Outside on the porch, Hailey shook her head in disbelief. “I honestly don’t know whether to kiss you or kill you right now!”

“Grant!” Randy called, opening the door that led to the porch.

“You might want to kiss me,” Grant whispered as he took off his hat and placed it on Hailey’s head. “I think he has dibs on the other.”

Grant faced his father with a shrug that said he had said all he had to say and wasn’t sorry for any of it.

“We need to talk,” Randy gulped. “Privately, if you don’t mind.”

Grant exhaled softly.

Randy smiled remorsefully at Hailey. “Hailey,” he nodded, “my son is right. I had no business dragging you into my argument with your father. I’m deeply sorry, and I hope you will accept my sincere apology. You obviously mean a great deal more than I realized to my son.” He frowned. “Thank you for being there for him… when I wasn’t.”

“It’s okay,” Hailey spoke softly.

Randy cleared his throat. “Grant, can we…?”

“Yeah, let’s just go out to the carport,” Grant grumbled, sure there was nothing his father could say to him that would ease the mounting tension between them.

Randy paced back and forth, not really knowing where to begin, and he wasn’t completely surprised when Grant started for him.

“Thank you for apologizing to Hailey. That meant a lot to me,” Grant admitted.

“I like to think that I am a man who can admit when he’s wrong,” Randy nodded.

“Harvard’s going to be good for me, Dad,” Grant said, determined to guide the conversation in a purposeful direction.

“I’m sure you’re right,” Randy said, rubbing his hands together. “I guess I just wanted you boys to want to do what I did…to follow in my footsteps, carry on tradition…take over the family business…like a cotton farmer who teaches his son the tricks of the trade, and, when he’s gone, leaves the farm to him…or the mom and pop family grocery store that has been passed down from generation to generation.”

“It’s not that I don’t want to follow in your footsteps,” Grant assured Randy. “You’ve accomplished so many amazing things in your lifetime…who wouldn’t want to strive to achieve the professional accolades that you have? Your life has been full of admirable accomplishments and heroic deeds, but sometimes… well, sometimes, I feel like you’ve spent my whole life fighting for Ike’s dreams and your dreams for him. I feel like you have spent my lifetime trying to mold me into someone I’m not. He’s gone, Dad. I’m never going to be the son you lost, so why can’t you accept that I’m trying the best I know how to be who I’m supposed to be?”

“I don’t want you to be your brother,” Randy said harshly. “I have never wanted or expected you to be Ike.”

“Then why have you insisted for years that I imitate the life Ike wanted?” Grant yelled back. “I don’t have one single memory of your golden child, but…”

“Aren’t you the same person who just called me out for being disrespectful?” Randy pointed.

“Fine,” Grant held his hands up. “I mean Ike no disrespect…this is all about you and me. I regret that I don’t have any memories of him that are my own. I only know what you have told me. West Point was his dream. Becoming an Army officer was his life’s goal. A career in the military was the life he wanted for himself. That’s not my life, Dad…that’s not what I want. I’m not Ike; I’m the replacement kid!”

“Replacement kid?” Randy shook his head.

“That’s what it feels like sometimes,” Grant shrugged.

Randy nodded, his stern face softening. He chuckled to himself. “You know, Grant,” he reflected, “I used to think I had the parenting thing down pat. When David was born, I was so nervous. I had never been anybody’s daddy before. Your mother read all the books, and we took all the classes.” He laughed at himself. “Anyway, what I’m getting at is that, by the time you came along, I had raised four kids by the book. I guess I got a little cocky, because with you I feel like I missed a few steps along the way. That’s not to say that you didn’t turn out as well as the rest. I guess what I’m saying is that if I could do it over again…we would play basketball every afternoon, and I’d tell you that I loved you as often as you’d let me.”

“I’ve always known you love me, Dad,” Grant replied. “Growing up, I always felt like my life was likely to change dramatically at any second, and I hated that. I wanted stability, and the only place I ever found it was in the guarantee that, no matter what base we were stationed at or where I was going to school, your love and Mom’s love were always gonna be there. That, I never doubted… not for one second.”

“You’re right though,” Randy conceded reluctantly. “I did more things with Ike. I feel like he got me at a different stage of my life than you did, and I regret that. But, I have never wanted you to be Ike. I have never looked for you to replace Ike.”

“But he was the perfect son,” Grant replied. “I’ve heard enough stories to know that he was everything you wanted in a son.”

Randy smiled. “He was special,” he nodded. “He was a good boy, a strong boy…a hard worker…he had a strong sense of country and a great respect for West Point. He was loving and kind, and he worshiped his daddy. He liked to talk to me; I loved talking to him. I couldn’t have asked for a better kid than Ike. He didn’t talk back; he didn’t balk at authority.” Randy ruffled Grant’s hair. “But, you are every bit as special to me as he is. Do you understand that? I don’t have one son…I have three…all three of whom I love equally…equally but differently.”

Grant nodded slowly.

“Grant, I love you,” Randy said confidently. “I may not always agree with certain decisions you make. We might not always see eye-to-eye on things.” He paused before adding, “Ike never would have been suspended from school for fighting. I never would have caught him experimenting with illegal substances as part of his own personal research project. He never would have thrown a brick through anyone’s window or vandalized anyone’s property. He never would have disappeared for days at a time without telling your mother and I where he was. But, do you know what else? Ike couldn’t speak ten languages; Ike didn’t make people laugh by saying the most irreverent things at the most inappropriate times; Ike didn’t make a perfect sore on the ACT and SAT; Ike couldn’t do mathematical equations in his head faster than most men can figure them with a calculator; he couldn’t read a book and quote key passages back to you verbatim, and Ike never would have had the sheer guts to stand up to me in a room full of onlookers and tell me that I was being disrespectful to the person he loved. I have so much respect and admiration for your talents and abilities, Son.”

“Then why don’t you trust me to use them as I see fit?” Grant shrugged.

“I do,” Randy nodded, “but I understand that it may not always feel that way.”

“No, it doesn’t,” Grant replied shortly.

“Let me tell you something,” Randy said as he sat down on the hood of Nora’s car. “A father takes his greatest pride, not from his own accomplishments, but in watching his children out achieve him. It was my goal in my life to provide you and your brothers and sisters with opportunities I never had, and to have you benefit from my wisdom, experience and accomplishments. I am a competitive man; I don’t like to lose. I have never been satisfied unless I am the best at what I do! It really gets my goat anytime anybody outdoes me…unless that person is one of my children…because that’s not losing…that’s a father’s greatest victory.”

Grant smiled.

“So, I’m rooting for you, Son,” Randy nodded. “I only want what is best for you. That is the only reason I care so much, the only reason I’m so invested in your college plans. I have tried to guide you throughout every step of your life, not to mold you into someone else, but because I know from experience that each decision you make in your life will define who you become. I just want you to make the choices that are right for you, Grant…that’s all.”

“And be all that I can be,” Grant winked.

Randy smiled. “You have everything going for you! You’re brilliant; you’re witty, and I think that it is about time that I accept the fact that you have become a responsible adult, beyond capable of making thoughtful decisions. I trust your judgment, and I’ll support whatever you want to do, Grant. I just thought West Point was a great opportunity, and I was looking out for you and your best interest…using any connections that I had to help advance your future. I don’t think there is any father in the world that could be disappointed by his son’s acceptance to Harvard.” Randy put his hand on Grant’s shoulder. “I’m proud of you and the man I see you becoming. You’ve got a bright future ahead of you, and, on top of that, you seem happy…”

“I am happy, Dad,” Grant nodded. “I don’t know how to describe what Hailey and I have, but I’m not willing to give it up. I love her.”

“Have you told her that?” Randy asked.

“Well, yeah,” Grant grinned. “My timing and delivery could have probably used some work. I tend to yell it during arguments…but those are just words anyway, right? They don’t mean that much…I mean love is something you show, not something you say.”

“That’s right,” Randy agreed. “And, I know from experience that girls from Hope Hull are a special breed, so if you’re lucky enough to take one away with you…protect her heart…always…because the day you lose it is the day that nothing else you’ve done or accomplished will matter in the least.”

Grant smiled at his father, and an unspoken forgiveness seemed to radiate through his expression. “For eighteen years, you’ve been larger than life in my eyes, Dad…and I think that the one thing I have taken from all that has happened this year is that even heroes mess up…even heroes fail sometimes, and that gives a guy like me hope. I’ve messed up…I’ve messed up a lot…but you’ve made me realize that a relationship is about that one girl who supports you and loves you, even when you don’t deserve it at all. I see it in Mom…she still loves you.”

“I love your mother,” Randy nodded. “Your mom and I have been through a lot over the years. We survived the stress of war; we got through Rachel’s pregnancy; we survived the death of a child; we survived your rebellious years…and we will survive my shortcomings.”

Grant’s eyes welled up with tears. “Dad,” he gulped, surprised by his own emotions, “did you know that you were my hero?”

Randy lowered his head as he listened to his son’s words.

“Did you know that the day I saw you on our couch with Cindy that I felt like I had nothing left to believe in?” Grant cried as he fought to suck back his tears. “Do you have any idea what it’s like to see your hero fall apart right in front of your eyes?”

“Grant,” Randy said, lifting Grant’s chin and forcing his son to look into his eyes, “let me tell you a little secret, Son.” He took a long, deep breath as he battled his willingness to go on. “Your old man’s no hero.”

“You were to me,” Grant cried.

“Stop that,” Randy shook his head. He took Grant by the shoulders. “Wipe those tears,” he demanded. “I’m so ashamed of everything that happened with Cindy; I am heartsick that I could disappoint you and the rest of our family the way that I did. I am sickened that I didn’t set a better example for you, but I was never a hero, Grant.”

“I think the history books will disagree with you,” Grant said confidently.

“They’ll be wrong,” Randy boomed, tears filling his eyes. “When I went into battle, my number one goal was always to bring my boys back home to their mamas, and I was good at that. I made decisions that saved men’s lives…and there was a time when I could have bought into the accolades…I welcomed them…I could see myself as that hero who had done heroic things under pressure. But sixteen years ago, this general got a reality check…and I learned that I was far from heroic.”

Randy reached into his wallet and handed Grant a folded photograph that looked like it must have been taken out, unfolded and refolded thousands of times over the years. Part of it was taped where the crease had simply given way, and it looked as though it could simply crumble if not handled carefully.

“What is this?” Grant asked as he stared at a picture of himself with his dad and his two brothers.

“That was the day he died,” Randy shook his head reverently. “Your mama took that picture before we left the house.”

“The little boy in this picture should remember him,” Grant said, finally looking away from the photograph in his hand. “We look close.”

“You were,” Randy nodded, emotions flooding his features. “He was so attentive to you. No one ever relished the role of big brother quite like Eisenhower did.”

Grant smiled as he handed the picture back to Randy.

“That day, I only had three boys to bring home to their mama, Grant…and I couldn’t do it,” Randy’s eyes became saturated, and his voice cracked as he placed the treasured photograph back into his wallet. “David was home from West Point on break; Ike had just been appointed for the following school year. I was the proudest man that day. It was supposed to be boys’ night out! We were going out to celebrate another Cohen man’s appointment to the United States Military Academy.”

“I saw you even put me in an Army t-shirt for the occasion,” Grant gestured.

“Ike and I had gone on a trip to visit David at school. Ike found that shirt in a little toddler size, and he couldn’t wait to bring it home to you,” Randy smiled. “You loved it. When your mother would try to dress you in anything else, you would complain, ‘No, Mama! Ike shirt!’ That’s what you called it…your Ike shirt!”

Knowing that the subject of his brother’s death was a difficult one for his father, Grant thought of changing the subject, but he couldn’t get his mind off of his father’s insistence that he was no hero. “What happened that night?” he asked softly.

“The driver of an eighteen wheeler fell asleep at the wheel,” Randy explained, his voiced strained. “David and I were thrown from the car. David was banged up, but he was alive, so I left him and ran back to the car as fast as my knee would let me. The car was on fire, nearly totally engulfed at that point. There wasn’t much time…I knew I had to act fast…and I wish I could tell you that I did something miraculous and heroic…but I was no hero…I was no combat-tested Army officer doing the impossible. I was just a scared dad who couldn’t react fast enough.”

Grant didn’t take his eyes off his father as Randy battled the emotions of his memory.

“I could see Ike,” Randy cried, his tears flowing with raw and all-consuming intensity now. “He was hurt, but he was moving; he was alert; he was fighting with his seatbelt. I knew he had a chance to pull himself out of that car. He had a chance…he had a fighting chance. You …my baby boy…you were on the other side…just two years old, trapped, strapped helplessly in a car seat, screaming for your daddy.”

The color drained from Grant’s face as his eyes widened. “Nobody ever told me that I was in the car, Dad,” Grant cried.

Randy put his arm around Grant and pulled his son close to him. “A hero, Grant,” he wailed, “could have gotten both of his boys out of that car in time! I quit being a hero that day, and I’m so sorry that you grew up with a father who was determined, at any cost, to prove to himself that he could be a hero again.”

Grant was crying so hard that his tears gripped his windpipe, and he struggled to catch his breath. Tears flowing, he made himself look up at his father. “Do you ever wish you had made a different choice that day?” he bawled.

“Oh, Grant,” Randy sighed, pulling his son back into his arms even tighter than before. “There was no choice to make, and, in a way, I’m grateful for that…because there would have been no way for me to choose between two boys who I love more than you can imagine. You needed me…more than he did, you needed me. I did what I had to do, and, if I could go back and trade my life for his, I would do it without a thought, but there never has been and never will be a day when I wish I hadn’t pulled you from that car, Grant.”

“Why has nobody ever told me this story?” Grant demanded.

“It’s not easy to talk about,” Randy lowered his head, forcing Grant to remain in his embrace.

“I could go to West Point; I could do it, Dad; I could do it for you and for my brother…” Grant’s words were flowing so rapidly that he had yet to take a breath.

“Grant, look at me,” Randy took his son’s face in hands to force eye contact, though Grant looked away. “Look at me, Buddy.”

Grant slowly allowed his eyes to meet his father’s. “I’m so sorry, Dad,” he cried. “I’m so sorry for everything…for every time I messed up…”

“I’m the one who should be sorry,” Randy wept. “God knows I never blamed you for what happened to your brother…but maybe subconsciously it was the reason I pushed so hard.”

The side door of the house opened, and David stepped outside, his face registering immediate concern. “Is everything okay out here?” he gulped.

Grant turned to his brother, tears flowing.

“Dad, what’s going on?” David moved slowly toward them.

Randy cracked his neck to one side and then the other.

“David, why didn’t you ever tell me?” Grant cried accusatorily. “Why didn’t anybody tell me that if it wasn’t for me, Ike would still be alive?”

David’s eyes flashed as he stared at Randy, terrified of what his father must have said.

“Grant, that is not what I meant for you to take from that,” Randy hung his head.

Grant looked only at David. “He said he never wishes that he hadn’t pulled me from that car, but I can’t believe that….it’s not realistic! All those times I messed up so badly…it had to be there, in the back of his mind. Every time I got in trouble, he had to wonder how differently things could have been. Every time I failed him, he had to think about it …”

“Don’t do this to yourself, Grant!” David grabbed Grant’s shoulders. “What happened that day was an awful tragedy…”

“You and Ike were so close,” Grant interrupted. “Don’t you ever wish that Dad had saved your best friend instead of your headache of a little brother?”

“Grant,” David sighed.

“It’s okay,” Grant shook his head. “You don’t have to say, no. I know that would be a lie…even if you didn’t mean anything by it.”

“I regret that I didn’t have the strength to pull myself off the ground and run back to that car until it was too late,” David said truthfully. “It’s one of those situations that has no right answers. But, I do know that I am so thankful that I have gotten to know you over the last sixteen years. That two-year-old that Ike and I both so adored has turned out to be quite a blessing to our family. I’ve always been able to see your heart when you look into the eyes of your niece; I see it now in the way you are with Hailey. Grant, Ike would be so proud of you! Did Dad tell you what Ike’s last words were?”

Grant shook his head. He glanced over at his father whose eyes filled with fresh tears. “I remember it like it happened yesterday,” Randy recalled. “Despite the fact that he was trying feverishly to free himself with wrists that were shattered, his voice in the middle of that horrific situation remained so eerily calm that his words seemed to rise above the flames. You were screaming for me and then for Ike. The flames were so close, and you were so scared. As I reached the car, I heard Ike trying to soothe your tears.”

“What did he say?” Grant swallowed.

Randy smiled, his pride in his middle son’s courage evident. “He said, ‘Close your eyes and say your prayers, Grant. Daddy’s coming. Daddy’s coming. He’ll always be with you, and so will I.’”

“Ike never made a promise that he didn’t keep,” David shook his head. “He was the most loyal and devoted friend and brother you could ever imagine. He said he would never leave you, and I don’t think he has.”

“I remember the strangers who held me back and kept me from going back into that car after it blew up,” Randy recalled with fists clinched. “At the time, I hated them for stopping me. I knew Ike was gone. I knew I couldn’t save him. But, in the moment, I wanted to be the father who died trying.” Randy reached for Grant again and pulled him into a tight embrace. “But I knew soon after, that, despite the fact that part of my heart was gone, there was a reason that God put those strangers there and gave them the strength to hold off a six-foot-six, career military veteran who was fighting with all he had.” Randy kissed the top of Grant’s head. “I have never wanted anything but the best for you. I have pushed West Point because that represented what was best for me. If Harvard is right for you, then don’t you dare think that I will be any less proud when I stand at your graduation than I was when David received that first salute.” He ruffled Grant’s hair. “And you’re right, Soldier. I want you to be all you can be…because it’s just a good motto to live by. West Point’s loss is Harvard’s gain! All I ask is that you be the best darn lawyer they have ever produced.”

Grant smiled up at his father. “Yes, Sir.”

Randy motioned David over. He put his arms around both his boys. “You boys know that I don’t like to get emotional in front of my kids, but I think this conversation was long overdue.”

“We love you, Dad,” David gulped.

“I love you too,” Randy nodded. “And I am so proud of you both. David, you’re the family man I’m still striving to be. Melissa is one lucky woman, and, for her sake and for Leah’s, I hope you’ve learned a lesson or two from your dad’s mistakes.” Randy turned his head from his oldest son to his youngest. “And, Grant, you have more talent in your little finger than I have in my entire body. I could stand here and go on and on about the things that I can envision you accomplishing in your life from a professional standpoint, but, as a man who has been there and done that, I want to tell you right here and now that the most important thing in your life, aside from faith in God, should be your future wife and your future children. Your children are the most important legacy you leave, and, despite everything I have done to hurt our family, I look at the two of you, and I know that, for all the things I got wrong, your mother and I got something right.”

As the evening got late, some were preparing to head over to Granny Miller’s house for the night, while others, including Randy, had decided to drive back to Memphis and get a hotel room.

As Nora sat at the kitchen table with Joanna, lamenting the fact that she had not invited John to join her for yet another family holiday, the sound of Grant’s laughter poured from the living room. Nora peaked her head out the kitchen doorway, delighted by the sound of his childlike giggles that were rare and treasured. His mood had shifted, a common phenomenon that Randy could produce in those he loved.

“Careful, boys!” Nora called as David and Grant wrestled playfully on the floor.

“David!” Grant screamed as David pounced on top of his little brother. Despite the age difference between them, they loved to tussle like most brothers, but Grant felt more vulnerable tonight than he ever had. His energy was gone, and, though he didn’t want to admit it, when David pounded on him, it truly hurt.

“Off the top rope!” David grinned as he put his hands up to his mouth to mimic the muffled cheers of the crowd as he fell down onto Grant.

Grant laughed as he punched at his brother.

“You’re about to go in the sleeper hold,” David called.

“Dad?” Grant cowered playfully as he punched David in the jaw.

“My gosh, Grant!” David yelled. “You play too rough!”

“Don’t rub it,” the general chuckled from the recliner.

“I barely hit you!” Grant laughed.

“Here, let me show you!” David laughed as he pinned Grant’s arms to the floor.

“Dad,” Grant laughed nervously as he wiggled toward the couch.

“You punched him in the face, Soldier,” the general shrugged as David drug Grant away from the safety of the sofa. “He owes you one!”

David punched Grant hard in the arm and then in the chest.

“Dad?” Grant giggled.

Randy just smiled at his boys.

Suddenly, Grant’s tone changed. “David, quit!” he cried.

David playfully pounded Grant in the chest again.

“Give me a break, David,” Grant wiggled away from him with no attempt to fight back.

David let go of his brother, sure it was just some tactic Grant would employ before launching a sneak attack.

Grant sat up, his breathing heavy.

“Whoa,” David sighed. “Is your nose bleeding?”

Grant wiped his nose with the back of his hand and then stared at the blood.

“Grant, you okay?” Randy asked.

Nora walked into the living room with Joanna trialing behind her. “What happened?” she exclaimed.

“This jerk busted my nose,” Grant shoved David.

“What?” Nora exclaimed. “David, what did you do? Grant, go to the bathroom!”

“David?” Melissa gasped as she walked into the room with Leah on her hip.

“I didn’t touch his face!” David insisted.

“He busted my nose, Mama,” Grant pointed with a grin.

“Go to the bathroom, Grant,” Nora insisted.

“David,” Melissa sighed scoldingly. “You guys are way too old to play so rough.”

“Baby, I didn’t touch his face!” David insisted. “I should have after he landed a cheap shot to my jaw…but I didn’t!”

“I don’t see your face bleeding, you bully!” Grant hollered from the bathroom.

Randy laughed.

“See,” David rolled his eyes. “He is enjoying this way too much.” He walked toward the bathroom to see what he could do to help his brother.

“Get out of here,” Grant insisted as he slammed the door on David.

“Grant, are you okay?” Nora called.

“Fine,” Grant laughed.

Hailey, Jessica and Emily walked in the back door, shivering as they took off their coats.

“It is really getting cold out there!” Emily announced.

“Where’s Grant?” Hailey asked.

“His nose is bleeding,” Nora sighed.

“Not again,” Hailey sighed as she rushed toward the bathroom. She gently tapped on the door. “Baby, are you okay?” she called.

Grant didn’t answer. He stood in front of the bathroom mirror trying to get his nose to stop bleeding when he noticed a nagging pain in his chest. He rubbed his chest with his hand and winced to himself. Curiously, he lifted his blue Tar Heels hoodie he was wearing and stared in horror at the purple and black bruises that David’s punches had left behind. For a moment he stared into the mirror, then softly he asked, “Hails, can you ask my brother to come in here for a minute?”

“Let me in, Grant,” Hailey gulped.

“Hailey, don’t come in here,” Grant insisted. “I need David.”

“David!” Hailey called. “Come quick! Grant wants you!”

David hurried over and knocked on the door. “Let me in, Grant!”

Grant turned the knob, and David slid inside the bathroom. Grant stared wide-eyed at his older brother, his nose still bleeding. “Why are you looking at me like that? What’s wrong?” David begged. “Won’t your nose stop bleeding?”

“Look at this,” Grant whispered as he slowly lifted his shirt.

David stared in disbelief at his brother’s chest. “I didn’t do that!” David said defensively. “Have you lost your mind? What did you do, stand here and beat on your chest? Do you want Mom to strangle me or something?”

“I don’t know what to do, David,” Grant sighed, and David could hear the fear in his brother’s voice.

David swallowed hard. “Take your shirt off,” he said, assisting his brother in pulling his shirt over his head. David stared at the similar bruises along Grant’s shoulders and down his arms. “Oh… my… gosh…” was all David could say.

“What is going on?” Grant gulped as he wiped at his nose.

“I don’t know,” David shook his head, but his words sounded ominous.

“David, what is wrong with me?” Grant begged, wanting his brother to offer him a simple answer. “I am exhausted.”

“Grant, I think Dad needs to see this,” David said with a look full of mounting concern.

Grant held on to David’s shoulder for support. “David, something’s really wrong. I feel so weak.”

David reached for his brother, scared he would pass out again. “Why are you so warm? Did you just get hot while we were horsing around, or do you have a fever?” David felt his own forehead, trying, with no luck, to assess the situation.

“I don’t know,” Grant swiped at the dried blood around his nose out of habit.

“Dad!” David called as he stuck his head out the door. “Come in here, please!”

Randy stood. “Let me go see what this pow-wow in the bathroom is all about,” he rolled his eyes. “I guess I’m gonna have to teach these rookies how to stop a dang nosebleed. Anybody got any tampons?”

“What?” Jessica exclaimed.

“Oh, Dad…please don’t give all the military’s secrets away at once,” Emily rolled her eyes.

“Dad?” David called again, more insistently.

“Okay, what is wrong in there?” Joanna followed her father down the hall.

Randy opened the door to the bathroom and stared at his son, sitting on the bathroom counter, bruised and breathless.

Nora gasped when she saw Grant. “Randy, get him in the car!” she cried. “We’re going to the hospital right now!”

David walked out of the bathroom, allowing his parents to take over. He put his arm around his wife, and she rubbed his arm, sharing in his concern. “Mel, I don’t think that kid ever had the flu,” he whispered, closing his eyes, no need to finish his thought.

Jessica put her arm lovingly around Hailey. “He’ll be okay,” she nodded.

Grant lifted his eyes, looking past his mother toward Hailey. “Come here,” he motioned. Hailey eased her way toward Grant. “I love you,” he said confidently. “Everything will be fine after I go to the doctor and find out what’s wrong. Don’t worry, okay?”

Hailey nodded.

“It’s snowing!” Wally called boisterously from the front door, startling everyone.

“It looks like mostly sleet to me,” Jack said as he followed Wally inside. “And that wind is really picking up. It was a dicey drive back from the Harper farm, but I got us some extra firewood.”

“Yeah, Rachel,” Wally added, “I don’t know about driving over to Granny’s in the dark in this weather.”

“Well, everyone is more than welcome to bunk here,” Jack offered. “You’ll have to make do anywhere you can find a spot, but we have plenty of extra quilts in storage.”

“Jack,” Randy asked, forgetting their earlier showdown, “do you think the storm is set in? I think we may need to take Grant to the hospital.”

“Can’t I just wait, since I have an appointment in the morning?” Grant begged. “I really just want to rest. I’m freezing as it is…I don’t want to get out in the arctic air in the middle of a storm.”

“You’re burning up,” David gulped.

“Let’s get you some warm clothes and take your temperature, Baby,” Nora said as she led Grant to his room.

“I know all these roads well; I’m more than willing to drive you if you think he needs to go,” Jack told Randy.

“Thanks,” Randy nodded appreciatively. “I mean that.”

The following morning, Hailey was sitting Indian style in a kitchen chair, her furry, Tennessee orange slippers protruding beneath her knees, her hair knotted up in a ponytail holder.

Grant sat to her right looking pale and exhausted, wearing glasses and a sleeveless, white, ribbed undershirt that revealed numerous bruises.

Jessica was to Hailey’s left; she sipped from her coffee, both of her perfectly manicured hands plastered around her cup. Her freshly blow-dried hair flowed down the back of her revealingly snug, spaghetti-strap nightshirt.

David sat at the table eating a granola bar, even as Nora and Melissa stood at the stove making breakfast.

Emily, her hair tied up in a country blue towel, stood at the refrigerator, pouring herself a glass of chocolate milk as Joanna reached past her for the orange juice.

“Look!” Jessica said proudly as Nora placed a platter of eggs in the middle of the table. Jessica swept her hair to the side and pointed at the tiny, red sun on the back of her shoulder, a fake tattoo courtesy of Wally.

“Lovely,” Nora scoffed.

“I have one too,” Emily announced. “It’s a heart!”

Rachel walked in, dressed for the day, admiring the bracelet Wally had given her the night before. In fact, he had handed out all of his Christmas gifts during the storm-forced, impromptu sleepover because he was simply too excited to wait until Christmas morning.

“It’s beautiful,” Jessica smiled at Rachel.

“Thank you,” Rachel smiled radiantly as she poured herself a cup of coffee.

“That is a classy piece, right?” Wally grinned proudly.

“There are so many things I could say right now,” Grant shook his head, “but, lucky for you, Wally, my mama taught me never to engage in a battle of wits with someone who is unarmed.”

“Humph,” David nodded to his sisters. “And to think that back when we were all coming up, she was still sticking to her old notion of if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.”

“Get you some breakfast, Wally,” Nora motioned toward the table as she sat down a plate of bacon and sausage. “Biscuits are in the oven.”

“Hope you like them burnt,” Rachel quipped.

“Wally, you promised me strawberry Pop-Tarts from your suitcase,” Emily poked out her bottom lip.

Wally struck a pose, pointing at Emily. “Emmers, it’s like we share a brain…”

“Emily’s?” Grant raised an eyebrow.

“I was just thinking, what was it that I meant to bring to the kitchen?” Wally snapped his fingers. “Boom! Then you said it! Pop-Tarts for my favorite girl!”

“Hurry up, Wally,” Rachel called as Wally jogged away. “I need to ask your advice on something really important before we go into town.”

“Well, that can’t be a step in the right direction,” Grant said aloud.

“I’m being serious, Brat!” Rachel scolded.

“I can see that,” Grant nodded as he adjusted his glasses. “And, you should ask Wally’s advice,” he told Rachel.

Rachel seemed pleased with his change of heart. “Really?”

“Sure,” Grant shrugged, as though confused by Rachel’s surprise. “Absolutely… just ask him what he would do… then do the exact opposite. It’s fail proof. Good thinking, Rach!”

Hailey stared at Grant. “Be nice,” she insisted.

“I’m trying,” Grant grinned.

“Try harder,” Hailey nodded, rolling her eyes.

Rachel ran off after Wally, leaving everyone staring at Grant.

“Sorry, it’s the fever talking,” Grant shrugged.

“Rachel sure is in a good mood,” Melissa chuckled.

“All I want to know is what bank Wally had to rob to pay for that bracelet he bought her?” David laughed.

“Well,” Joanna said sarcastically, mocking the stories Wally had told them. “You know…the band has really taken off since they hired their new manager.”

“And we’ve all got the new CDs to prove it!” Melissa laughed.

“The way I see it,” Grant pondered, “if we combine them, one of us can walk away with a really nice coaster set out of the deal. Who’s it gonna be?”

“Ooh, ooh, dibs,” Joanna waved her arm playfully.

“So, I have to know,” Hailey raised her eyebrow. “What do y’all say about me when I leave the room?”

The phone rang. “And on that note, I’ll get it,” Grant volunteered as he stood up.

“Saved by the bell,” David chuckled.

“I think Rachel and Wally must have gotten sidetracked looking for the Pop- Tarts,” Melissa smiled.

“Well,” Joanna shrugged, “the good news is…she’s already pregnant.”

“Oh, Jo…geez,” David shook his head.

“That was Dr. Mason,” Grant said as he returned to the table. “He just wanted to make sure I was still planning on going to my appointment this morning.”

“We will be there,” Nora said, taking the biscuits, only slightly charred, from the oven. “Where is Randy? Has anyone seen Jack?”

“Get a little nervous when they’re both missing in action?” Joanna quipped.

“They’ve actually been playing nice,” Emily smiled.

“I still like to keep my eye on them,” Nora frowned. “David, go find Dad and tell him to come eat before Grant’s appointment. I’m going to go throw my clothes on as soon as I have a bite.”

“Nora, did you hear that Wally’s manager wants me to pose for the cover of his band’s next album?” Jessica announced as she struck a come hither pose in her chair.

“Rachel mentioned it,” Nora nodded as she poured a glass of juice. “Maybe I should talk to the photographer first! I’ve seen album covers these days, Jess…you’re only seventeen years old!”

“Wally promised it would be tasteful,” Jessica smiled.

“Shouldn’t the band be on the cover?” Hailey raised her eyebrow.

“Apparently the marketing team got a good look at Wally’s ugly mug and decided it was in their best interest to go in a different direction,” Grant shrugged.

“All the girls at school are going to be so envious when Jessica’s on the cover,” Emily bubbled with excitement.

“Wally said the single really has gotten a lot of attention at radio stations around the country,” Hailey said as she offered Grant the last bite of her breakfast by holding her fork up to his mouth while she talked.

“It got my attention when you turned it on last night,” Grant curled his lip as he waved off the food. “I’ll have to get the doctor to see if there’s anything he can do for a ruptured eardrum.”

“Grant, nothing to eat or drink until after your appointment,” Nora reminded.

“Would it kill you to say something positive occasionally?” Emily urged Grant. “I know I haven’t always been the biggest fan of Wally’s music, but this isn’t like the other records Wally has recorded in the past. Honestly, Grant…it’s on a whole new level!”

“The album is really good,” Jessica agreed. “You should give it a chance, Grant! Lyrically, I think it’s absolutely soulful…”

“Lyrically?” Grant exclaimed. “Well, that’s good to know because I was under the impression that the first single was just some ridiculous recording of a contest that broke out in the recording studio while Wally and a pal were arguing over who could say ooh ooh baby consecutively for the longest period of time without cracking up, passing out or throwing up.”

Hailey laughed, and even Nora couldn’t resist a smile.

“That’s just the current single,” Jessica insisted. “And, for your information, Hotshot, it is a remix of a very famous song! The other songs are much deeper.”

“Ah,” Grant nodded with a smile and a wink. “So, in other words, you can’t judge an album by its cover!”

“I hate you,” Jessica giggled.

“No you don’t, you love me,” Grant smiled as he leaned back in his chair.

“Well, I would slap you for her,” Hailey grinned, “but you bruise like a peach these days!”

“Speaking of which,” Nora stood. “Go get dressed. It will be time to leave soon. It is about time we get to the bottom of this and find out what is going on with you.”

Grant had only been in the doctor’s office for a grand total of five minutes before Dr. Martin spoke the words that seemed to echo off the walls. “I want to do a couple tests,” he said. He forced a smile that Grant could see right through. “You know, just to rule some things out.”

“Rule what out?” Grant replied.

Dr. Martin grimaced. “We’re going to get a complete blood count and follow that up with a bone marrow aspiration; you’ll feel some pressure as the needle is inserted, but the aspiration site will be numbed with a local anesthetic and shouldn’t be too painful.”

Jack was sitting in his chair watching television with Hailey when Nora and Grant arrived back home. Hearing the door open, Jack flipped the television off with the remote control. “There y’all are,” he said as he stood. He looked at his watch. “I didn’t think it would take so long to…” he began, but, as he caught his first glimpse of Nora’s tear-stained face, he stopped. “Nora, what is it?” he gulped.

Nora rubbed Grant’s arm as Hailey stood up from the couch. “Randy dropped us off here and went to talk to the rest of the family at Granny’s. Grant wanted to talk to Hailey first.”

“Grant, what did Dr. Martin say?” Hailey asked softly.

“I have an appointment with Dr. Lassiter in the morning,” Grant said, his eyes still fixed on the floor.

“What sort of doctor is he?” Hailey asked.

“He’s an oncologist, Hailey,” Grant said, and his voice cracked as his eyes met Hailey’s for the first time.

“An oncologist?” Hailey repeated, shaking her head unconsciously, as if willing Grant to take the words back. “But an oncologist is…”

“A cancer doctor,” Grant nodded as he reached for Hailey’s hand.

Hailey stared back at him, and the tears that lined the bottoms of his eyes made her heart race. “Grant, I don’t understand,” she sighed. “They think you might have cancer?”

Grant started to speak, then he paused.

Jack put his arms around Nora, and the longer Grant’s pause lingered the more Jack could feel Nora’s entire body tremble against his.

“You’re scaring me,” Hailey said in a voice that was meek and afraid. “I told you that you should have let me go with you.”

“I didn’t want you to go,” Grant shook his head. “I wanted to be able to come home and give you the good news that everything was going to be fine.”

“What are you saying?” Hailey cried, knowing the answer to her own question.

“Hailey, I have Leukemia,” Grant said slowly, as if testing each word.

“No…” the frightened whimper jumped from Hailey’s mouth.

“No,” Jack repeated.

“Yes,” Nora cried, letting her tears flow freely now, as if she and Grant had made a pact that she had to remain strong until he was able to tell Hailey the news that would change all their lives.

Hailey grabbed hold of Grant, and she held him as she heaved with tears. Grant stared blankly over her shoulder, stuck in the trance of utter disbelief that had taken him over ever since he had learned a deadly disease was attacking his body with unrelenting brutality.

Hailey sat at her mother’s grave, her knees pulled to her chest, and her tears streaming down her face.

“Hailey,” Grant said softly, and, still, it startled her.

He sat down next to her and put his arm around her.

“It’s freezing out here.” Hailey closed her eyes. “You shouldn’t be out here.”

“What are you doing?” Grant asked.

“Just thinking,” Hailey said as she eased Grant’s head into her lap and gently rubbed the back of his jacket.

“May I ask you a question?” Grant said, as he stared at the headstone in front of him. “How did your mother…”

“She had cancer,” Hailey cried before he could finish the question.

Grant sat up and took Hailey in his arms. “I’m gonna be okay, Hails,” he promised as he tenderly kissed the top of her head. She wept quietly as he held her, and she listened to his hopeful words. “You taught me about having faith, Hailey. You taught me that there are things in this world worth believing in, and I believe that we can beat this …together.”

Hailey frowned. “How is it that you’re the one who’s sick, and, yet, you’re still the one being strong for me?”

“I know you’re scared,” Grant nodded.

“I’m really scared,” Hailey gulped.

“I am too,” Grant sighed.

“So, what do we do next?” Hailey asked as she wiped her tears.

“I made them let me come home and tell you here…away from the hospital,” Grant confessed. “They’re going to admit me…we’ll start treatment, and we’ll pray for the best.”

“You remember when we were just getting to know each other, and I told you my scariest moment?” Hailey cried.

“Yeah, mine just got trumped too,” Grant exhaled as he kissed the top of Hailey’s head again.

The mood was somber that night despite everyone’s best efforts to make it not so. Grant was sitting on the floor, surrounded by Christmas gifts opened early. Leah was sitting in his lap, her face snuggled easily against his chest as she held a little, cloth doll with pigtails as red as her own.

“David,” Emily said as she leaned close to him, pointing to a line on the paper she was reading. “I don’t understand what everything means.”

“Honestly, I don’t either, Emily,” David shook his head.

“Come here, Em,” Grant motioned her over.

Emily sat down next to Grant; tears rolled down her cheeks as she leaned over and rested her head against his shoulder.

“Don’t cry,” Grant whispered.

“Don’t cry,” Leah repeated.

Emily smiled at Leah as she wiped her own tears.

“Look,” Grant said, his voice so controlled and confident as he spoke to Emily that everyone smiled admiringly at him. “This represents white blood cells, which are the ones that fight infection. This right here represents red blood cells which contain iron and carry oxygen and carbon dioxide throughout the body and keep your energy level up. This stands for platelets, which help your body clot bleeding. These types of blood cells are all produced by your bone marrow.”

All eyes were on Grant as he spoke.

“Basically, this sheet of paper says that my white blood cell count is elevated because an over abundance of immature white blood cells have built up and are preventing my healthy cells from working properly to fight infection. It says that my red blood cell count is low, which means that I am anemic, and that’s why I’ve been feeling so tired lately. This right here shows my platelet count, which is low and is the cause of the bruising and nosebleeds.”

Hailey closed her eyes as she sat on the couch wearing Grant’s hoodie. She took a deep breath, inhaling the faint scent of Tommy Hilfiger cologne that lingered. She heard Grant talking, sounding too academic and factual as he explained his diagnosis using words like hematocrit, thrombocytopenia, neutropenic, neutrophils, monocytes, lymphocytes, myelocytes, hematologist and oncologist.

“Tomorrow they want to do a spinal tap,” Grant shrugged. “So that’s where we stand right now.”

“What’s a spinal tap, Baby?” Rachel cried.

Grant shrugged. “It’s the medical community’s deceptively nice name for lumbar puncture! Basically, they’ll put a big needle in my lower back and start chemotherapy directly in the spinal canal to lessen the chances of the Leukemia developing in my central nervous system. Once my treatment protocol is determined by my doctors, they will most likely insert a central venous catheter into my chest where all of my medication and any blood components I need will be administered from that point on.”

“That thing will stay in your chest?” Melissa gulped.

“Yeah,” Grant nodded. “You know, in the vein below my collar bone.”

“Wow, so that’s gonna leave a scar, huh?” David winced.

“And let me tell you, that scar is my leading cause of concern at the moment,” Grant grinned sarcastically. “That and the whole hair debacle.”

“Grant,” Hailey frowned.

“You’re gonna like my battle scar, aren’t you, Hails?” Grant smiled. “Scars are sexy, right?”

When Hailey refused to engage in their usual witty repartee, Grant lifted Leah from his lap and stood up. He stepped over presents as he made his way to the sofa and sat down in Hailey’s lap. “Grant!” Hailey chided. “What are you doing? You are heavy!”

“I like this,” Grant grinned at her. “You thought about slapping me just now, and you had to think better of it! Am I right? Oh, how I have longed for this day!”

Hailey rolled her eyes. “Stop.”

“Come-on, Baby,” Grant smiled. “Laughter, it’s the best medicine, right?”

Hailey smiled concedingly.

“There’s that pretty smile that’s gonna get me through every single day,” Grant said as he kissed her lips. “Are you still gonna love me when I’m bald instead of blond?”

Hailey looked past Grant at everyone gathered around. “What makes you think I love you?” she said with Academy Award winning conviction.

Grant’s forehead wrinkled, and Hailey snorted as she laughed, which made Grant fall over on her laughing. Hailey wrapped her arms around Grant’s waist, and she melted into him as her laughter changed to tears.

As they stood in the hospital listening to the results of Grant’s blood tests, Nora reached instinctively for Randy’s hand and, with that single touch, she felt the wall she had built up between the two of them begin to crumble.

Now they stood in the hallway outside of Grant’s room, peering into the small, glass window on the door as their youngest child slept.

Nora stood by her husband’s side as he watched Grant through the window, his heart breaking as he witnessed the early stages of his son’s fight for the life he had only just begun to live. Nora looked with compassion into the hard eyes of a man who had faced many enemies, known many tragedies, yet now, facing a silent killer as deadly and as unpredictable as any army in the world, faced his greatest challenge yet.

Nora’s eyes filled with tears as she brought the heart-shaped necklace she was wearing to rest against her lips, and, as Randy shifted his eyes away from the window and down to meet Nora’s, a tear fell from his face onto hers. “I love you, Nora,” he grimaced.

“I love you too,” Nora wept as she buried herself in Randy’s embrace, and they stood there in the hallway holding on to one another as Christmas Eve faded into Christmas day.