Chapter Eleven

A week later, Julia had just put Ava to bed when the phone rang. When she picked up her cordless phone and saw Edie’s number, she eagerly pressed the button.

“Edie?”

“Hi, Jules.”

“Hi yourself. Where have you been? I’ve been trying to reach you for days. Your mother-in-law said she was looking after the kids while you and Aaron were out of town for a few days. Did you two go away for a second honeymoon, a little love fest?”

Edie laughed, but the sound was brittle. “I wish. I had some things I had to take care of. We were in Bangor.”

“In Bangor? All week?”

“Yeah. Dr. Campbell sent me to have some tests done at the hospital.”

Julia’s whole body went cold, and her stomach clenched. She put a hand over her abdomen. “What kind of tests?”

She heard Edie sigh and take a deep breath before continuing. “A breast biopsy, among other things. I have stage three breast cancer, Jules.”

For a moment Julia thought she might faint. She had to grip the edge of the kitchen counter to help her stand.

“That can’t be possible, Edie. You’re too young.”

“I keep saying that, but apparently cancer doesn’t care how young or old a person is.”

Julia struggled to keep the panic out of her voice. “Alex is your doctor?”

“Yes. He found the cancer initially, and then he sent me to a specialist in the city right away.”

Thank God Alex had found the cancer. But did he find it in time? “What are they going to do? How do we fight this thing?”

Edie sounded surprisingly calm. “I’m going to have surgery in a couple of days, and then after that my oncologist wants me to have a round of chemo, followed by a course of radiation to make sure we zap all the nasty little cancer cells in my body.”

“Damn right we’re going to zap the little bastards!”

Edie chuckled. “That’s the spirit.”

“What can I do to help?”

“I don’t know. Aaron’s mom is taking time off work to babysit the kids while we’re away, but I’m sure she could use a hand with my little hellions. Maybe you could give her a break?”

“Of course. How’s Aaron?”

“He’s…he’s taking it hard, Jules. He’s really trying to be strong for me, but he’s scared. I’m worried about him.” It was so like Edie to worry about the people she loved instead of herself.

“Don’t worry, sweetheart. We’ll look after him. And we’ll look after you, too. Okay?”

“Okay. Listen, we’ll talk more later, but right now I need to phone Tracy and give her the news, too. I’m sorry to dump this on you, Jules.”

“Don’t worry about me. Just concentrate on getting better.”

“I will. I love you.”

Julia could barely speak. “I love you, too.”

“I’ve got to go. Bye.”

“Bye.”

She set the phone on the counter, the numbness that had hit her when she’d first heard the word “cancer” now giving way to pain. Feeling blindly for one of the kitchen chairs, she sank into it, her legs unable to support her any longer. The tears came then, and she cried until she had nothing left except the fear that she was about to lose one of her dearest friends.

****

Alex’s cell phone woke him from the first decent sleep he’d had in a week. Groaning, he fumbled for the phone on his bedside table. When he saw Julia’s name on the screen, he sat up quickly and hit the talk button.

“Julia?”

“Alex, I’m sorry to be calling you so late.” She sounded tired, upset, and more than a little shaky. “Edie called me tonight to tell me about…about her cancer.”

He closed his eyes and bent his head. “I’m sorry, Julia.”

“She said you were her doctor, that you found the cancer.”

“I’m her GP. After she found a lump, I made the initial diagnosis and sent her to the cancer specialist in Bangor. It was important to find out what kind of cancer we’re dealing with so we can treat it properly.”

There was silence on the line, but he heard her erratic breath, as if she was holding back a torrent of tears. Finally she spoke.

“I know you can’t give me any details about her condition, but I need to understand. Edie said her cancer is at stage three. What does that mean?”

He chose his words carefully, not wanting to divulge any patient information, and not wanting to scare her.

“It means that her tumor is bigger than five centimeters across and that some of the lymph nodes are affected. But it hasn’t penetrated into the chest wall or the skin, and it hasn’t spread to any other organs.”

“What are her chances?” she asked quietly.

“Her odds are good,” he said, hoping to reassure her. “Someone with her symptoms is thought to have a seventy-two percent chance of survival over five years.”

“That’s pretty good, isn’t it?”

“Yes. It’s very good.”

Another pause. “Why did she get this, Alex? Why her?”

“I wish I could answer that question, but I can’t. Nobody can.”

“Edie is like a sister to me. She’s a good person. She’s never hurt anyone in her life.” Her voice cracked. “She has a husband and three kids who need her.”

“I know, sweetheart.”

“I’m so scared she’s going to die.”

“We’re going to do everything we can for her, Julia.”

“Please don’t let her suffer. I couldn’t stand for her to be in pain.”

“We’ll do everything we can to make her comfortable during her treatments, but I’m not going to lie to you. She’s got a struggle ahead of her.”

She sniffed. “Thank you for being honest with me.”

“Edie is young and strong, and she’s got the support of wonderful friends like you. She’s got a great chance of beating this, sweetheart. I want you to believe me.”

“I want to believe you. I really do.”

The pain he heard in her voice tore at his heart. He squeezed his eyes shut. “I know this is hard. But we’re going to get through this, I promise.”

He heard her muffled sob. “I should go. I’m sorry I woke you. Good night, Alex.” The line went dead.

He stared at the phone in his hand for a few moments before clicking the Off button. She was trying to deal with the news about her friend all alone, trying to be strong. Both Ava and Julia’s mother already needed her to be strong for them. How much more could she take?

Who was going to be strong for Julia?

Alex jumped out of bed and found his discarded clothes on a chair in the corner of his room. He dressed quickly and ran to the back door, where he’d left his shoes. Grabbing a jacket, his wallet, and a set of house keys, he locked the door and sprinted the two blocks to Julia’s house.

The likelihood of a neighbor seeing him enter her house at that time of the night was remote, but knowing how Julia felt about maintaining her reputation, he kept to the darkness, slipping around the side of the house to the back door. He knocked softly on the wooden door, once, twice, and then a third time, a little louder. Finally a light came on in the back door hallway, and Julia opened the door as far the chain would allow.

“Alex? What are you doing here?”

“I wanted to make sure you’re okay. Can you let me in?”

He saw her swallow. “I appreciate your concern, but I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“Julia.” He leaned his forehead against the door frame. “You’re upset. I don’t want you to be alone right now.”

She stared at him, her blue eyes swimming with tears. Then she closed the door in his face. He held his breath, not sure whether she was shutting him out or closing the door to remove the chain. His heart pounded with uncertainty, the wait interminable.

Finally, she opened the door and stepped aside to let him in. They stood staring at each other in the tiny vestibule. Then she laid her hand against his heart, and a tear streaked down her cheek.

“You’re right. I don’t want to be alone tonight.”

He wiped the tear with the pad of his thumb. “You don’t have to be. I’m right here.”

He lowered his mouth to hers and softly kissed her lips. She moaned against his mouth, her hand caressing his face. The light touch was all it took to set his blood on fire. He wanted to wrap her in his arms, touch every sweet inch of her skin. He wanted to be inside her, to empty himself in her, to make her shout his name as she orgasmed around him.

But she was too vulnerable tonight. If he took advantage of her weakened state, she’d hate him. He ended the kiss and took a step away from her, keeping her at arm’s length.

“Alex,” she whispered. “Make love to me. Please. I need you.”

“Julia—”

She pressed herself against him once more and kissed him until any protest he was about to make was overwhelmed by his need for her. Her tongue swept his mouth, tangling with his in a delicious duel that left him breathless and so hard he ached with wanting her. Ending the kiss, she wordlessly took his hand and led him up the stairs to her room. She slipped off her robe and threw it on a chair. A bedside lamp provided the only light in the room, just enough to reveal her short, white nightgown, the creamy length of her thighs, and the hard peaks of her nipples beneath the silky fabric.

She pushed the thin straps of her nightgown from her shoulders, and it skimmed down her body to pool at her feet. He stared at her, taking in her small, high breasts, her slender waist, the generous flare of her hips. Only a pair of skimpy panties covered her. Alex was seized with a desire to rip them from her body and sink himself into her.

He reached for her just as she reached for him. In a frenzy of kisses and touches, she helped him remove his clothes. He had just enough sanity left to find the condom he kept in his wallet and slip it on. Then they were on the bed, though he didn’t remember exactly how they got there. His body and mind had spiraled out of control in a way he’d never experienced before. Nothing mattered but Julia. Nothing mattered but her pleasure, her touch. He needed her like he needed his next breath.

Alex inserted his finger inside her, withdrawing and plunging until she convulsed around him, her body bowing, her head thrown back. Kissing her again, he swallowed the cries that ripped from her mouth. She writhed under him, lifting her hips, rubbing her mound against his cock. He struggled to prolong the pleasure for both of them, but felt himself slipping into the abyss.

He couldn’t wait any longer. Positioning himself at the entrance to her body, he gradually eased himself inside her. Trembling with the effort to take it slow, he pushed a little further. Julia’s heavy-lidded eyes opened, her face pale in the dim light.

“Alex, please. I need you. Please.”

Her soft hands kneaded his buttocks, her hips lifting to take him in deeper. Something inside him went wild. He thrust inside her, hard and deep, over and over, unable to stop. She met him thrust for thrust, her hands gripping him, her legs wrapping around him, spurring him on. His orgasm burst from his body with a sudden force that left him trembling and weak and unable to move from Julia’s arms. She held him tightly, their bodies still joined, and her face nuzzled against his neck.

“I’m crushing you,” he managed to whisper. “I should move.”

“Shh.” She kissed his neck. “Not yet. Stay.”

She smoothed her soft hands over his back and shoulders, and Alex relaxed against her. He couldn’t remember ever feeling this way after sex before, so sated, and so at peace. Being here with her felt so completely right.

Finally, he rolled off her and slipped across the hall to the bathroom to dispose of the condom. When he came back to the bed she was asleep, one hand under her cheek and her blonde hair mussed.

A beautiful mess.

Smiling, he climbed into bed and pulled her close. As he listened to the sound of her breathing, he wondered if this was the beginning of something for them, or if it was only the shock of learning about her friend’s illness that had prompted her to let him into her bed.

****

She was in a small boat on a lake. It was a perfect day. The gentle breeze cooled her skin from the heat of the sun without marring the glasslike finish of the water. Her two best friends were in the boat with her. Tracy and Edie laughed as they threw their fishing lines into the water.

Something tugged at Edie’s line, and she stood up, struggling to reel in her catch. But whatever was on the other end of the line was too strong, and it pulled her over the side of the boat and into the water. She disappeared under the surface. Tracy immediately dove in after her. Over and over, she came to the surface, gasping for air, then dove below the surface again to search for Edie. And then Tracy didn’t come back up to the surface for air. She was gone. They were both gone, and she was alone.

“No!” she screamed. “No! Don’t go! Don’t leave me!”

“It’s okay, sweetheart. It’s okay.”

Strong arms held her securely. Alex. She woke in an instant and wrapped her arms around him as tightly as she could. Snuggling against his chest, she breathed in the scent of him, a unique mix of aftershave and antiseptic soap.

“Bad dream?”

She nodded, the hair on his chest tickling her nose. “Yes.”

He stroked her hair. “Everything’s okay now, sweetheart.”

She felt safe in his arms, as if nothing could harm her. “I know.”

“Do you think you could go back to sleep?”

She gripped his arm, suddenly afraid. “Not yet. Don’t go.”

“I’m not going anywhere.”

Propping a couple of pillows behind them, he pulled her with him to lean against the headboard. Gently, he tucked the sheet around her and simply held her, his chin resting on the top of her head. Julia felt she could have stayed like that with him forever.

She thought about the way he’d made love to her, like she was something special, like he couldn’t get enough of her. When was the last time a man had felt that way about her?

She couldn’t get enough of him, either. She loved the feel of his smooth skin over powerful muscles, loved the strength of his body. Last night he’d pushed her to the very edge of every border, every boundary she possessed, and then pushed beyond. Their lovemaking had been fierce and wild, and so intense it had been almost unbearable at times. But it was the most amazing sex she’d ever experienced.

Despite the power of his body and the ferocity of their lovemaking, he could be tender and gentle, and so kind.

She wanted that power, that intensity, focused on her once more. She wanted to forget about Edie’s illness. She ran her hand down his chest, past his taut abdomen, to his penis. It sprang to life at her touch. He grabbed her wrist, preventing her from touching him again.

“That’s not a good idea.”

“Really?” She kissed his beard-stubbled chin. “I thought it was a totally excellent idea.”

“I only had one condom in my wallet, sweetheart.”‘

Her mouth stilled. “Oh.”

She leaned back against the headboard and looked up at him. They’d left the bedside lamp burning when they fell asleep, and it threw a soft light across his face, outlining the strong chin and the chiseled cheekbones. His dark hair fell rakishly across his forehead and, along with the stubble, gave him the look of a pirate. A very sexy, well-built pirate.

She wanted him. They just had to be a little creative.

She ran her fingers over the hard muscles of his chest, then leaned in to kiss her way down his body. When she reached his lower abdomen, she heard his sharp intake of breath and felt his hand grip her shoulder.

“Julia, no birth control, remember?” His voice sounded strained, his breathing erratic.

She looked up into his face. “I know. I just thought maybe we could try something…different.” She stroked him once more, the need inside her overwhelming her, and spurring her on. She barely recognized herself. All she knew was that she needed him. “I’ll make it good for you, I promise. Just don’t go. Please don’t go.”

“Julia.” His voice was strangled, the look on his face a mixture of apprehension and desire. “I told you, I’m not going anywhere.”

That was all she needed to hear. She bent over him, taking the tip of his penis into her mouth and teasing it with her tongue. Alex moaned and lifted his hips, providing all the incentive she needed to know he liked what she was doing. She took him fully into her mouth, sliding her tongue, her lips up and down from tip to hilt, her teeth raking gently over his shaft. Alex made inarticulate sounds in his throat. Then suddenly his body stiffened and he shouted his release. Julia lapped it up.

His breathing had barely returned to normal before Julia felt his hands around her waist, and suddenly found herself on her back with Alex on top of her. He took her left breast into his mouth, suckling and teasing it with his tongue, at the same time inserting two fingers inside her. She gasped at the sensation. Dear God, it felt so good, so right. She threw back her head and arched her back, teetering on the edge.

But then he suddenly abandoned his attention to her breasts and withdrew his fingers, leaving her whimpering with need. He kissed and licked his way down her stomach, to her inner thighs, urging her to open wider for him. The first touch of his tongue to her clit almost rocketed her off the bed. It was the most amazing sensation she’d ever felt, and she wanted more. She thrust her hips towards him, bucking wildly, desperate to be closer to him. He stayed with her, his wicked tongue overloading her system with pleasure, until she felt her climax building low in her belly. It suddenly burst free, overwhelming her with wave after wave of bliss and joy and contentment.

Alex held her, and she fell asleep once more, this time into a blessedly dreamless sleep.