part0012

Rachel’s question hung in the air like a bad smell, no one eager to acknowledge it. They sat in a circle on the deck, the boat bobbing and swaying without clear direction, the mast creaking ominously.

There was Rachel and Ana and Ricky. Across from Ana sat Lillian, still topless, and Josh, still in his black underpants. They pawed at each other, seemingly unable to help themselves and not caring who saw. Ana had donned Ricky’s yellow vest, which he had so gallantly given to her. It didn’t cover much, but it did make her feel less self conscious. She crossed her arms to hide her scars and tugged the hem down over her crotch.

Across from her sat the Aussies; Darren, Bret and Lisa. These three seemed to be old friends the way they carried on, the gravity of the situation apparently lost on them. They, like everyone else, were clad only in their underwear.

‘We are…exactly where we are,’ smiled Lillian in answer to Rachel’s question .

‘Okay, that’s really fucking helpful,’ said Rachel, unwittingly echoing her sister’s thoughts.

Josh stepped in. ‘It’s true. It doesn’t matter where we are, as long as we just are .’

Rachel decided not to pursue this dead-end line of questioning.

‘Right. Anyone have anything useful to add? Like what we’re all doing on this boat?’

‘Well, I remember it,’ said Ricky, somehow now one of the most sensible voices onboard. ‘Not in detail, but bits, y’know. We were all partying, drinking shots, dancing and stuff. We broke off from the main beach, looking for somewhere to make the party a bit more,’ he searched for the right word, ‘…private.’

‘Aw, I remember that!’ Said Darren in an Australian accent, his curly black hair hanging over his face. All eyes fell on him, waiting for more. ‘Ah, that’s all guys. I just remember it. That’s all.’

Ricky nodded slowly. ‘Oka-a-ay. So we spotted this boat, took our clothes off and swam to it. There was a fridge full of alcohol, and that’s where it ends for me, I guess.’

‘So how did we get here? ’ asked Ana. ‘In the middle of the fucking ocean, I mean.’

Bret raised his hand sheepishly. ‘That was us, I think,’ he said, gesturing at Darren and Lisa. ‘We defo raised the anchor.’

‘Yeah,’ agreed Darren.

‘But we couldn’t find any keys.’

‘No,’ said Lisa.

‘So this mad fucker hot-wired the shit out of it!’ said Bret, pointing at Darren, who suddenly remembered.

‘I did! I did !’ The two of them high fived.

‘And now we’re lost at sea. Nice going,’ said Ana, getting up and going to sit in the shade. Her pale Scottish skin wouldn’t last five minutes under the blistering sunshine. She wished for sun-screen. Maybe there was some on the boat?

‘What’s her deal? Panties on too tight?’

‘Fuck off, Darren,’ said Rachel, joining her sister.

‘I reckon they are,’ he continued. ‘They’re halfway up her bum!’

‘Would everyone just chillax,’ said Josh. ‘We’re on a journey . We’re meant to be here, together .’ Josh had a maddening way of overemphasising certain words that drove Ana crazy. She took Rachel’s hand, her cheeks burning in embarrassment at Darren’s comments.

‘Rach,’ she whispered conspiratorially.

‘I can’t deal with this.’

‘Me neither. It’s like a bad reality TV show.’

‘Which one would you make walk the plank first?’

Rachel thought carefully. ‘Lillian. Earth Mother. If she comes out with one more piece of cosmic bollocks…’

‘I’d make Josh go last, ‘cos he’s the only one who’s underwear is skimpier than mine.’

Rachel agreed. ‘You really can see everything, can’t you? Every vein, every hair…’

‘Stop it!’ laughed Ana. She didn’t want to think about Josh’s dick right now. She felt sick enough as it is.

‘Those other three don’t seem much better,’ said Rachel.

‘What, the Aussies?’

‘Yeah. Mr Misogyny 2018 and the other two.’

Ana laughed, though it hurt her head to do so. She thought she might still be under the influence of last night’s libations. ‘At least they’re normal, I guess. What’re their names? ’

‘Darren, Bret and Lisa, I think. The girl doesn’t talk much.’

‘Small mercies, I suppose.’

Overhead the unyielding sun continued to rise, the water lapping at the side of the boat. Apart from that, everything was still. The engine had cut out hours ago, either due to lack of fuel or Darren fucking something up when he hot-wired it.

They needed a plan, even just to stave off the boredom.

‘Has anyone searched the boat yet?’ asked Ana, loud enough for most of the occupants to hear.

‘We did,’ said Darren as he lay dozing beneath the shadow of the sail. ‘But then we found the booze stash and stopped.’ He raised a beer at her. ‘Want one?’

The thought of drinking — of ever drinking again — curdled Ana’s stomach.

‘No, that’s the last thing on Earth any of us need right now.’

‘Speak for yourself,’ said Darren, popping the cap with his teeth and glugging the amber liquid down.

‘Ana’s right,’ said Ricky, standing up to create the illusion of importance. ‘We should check the boat and gather together all the supplies. Look, I hate to say it, but we’ve no idea how long we’ll be stranded out here. We may need to ration things so that we don’t run out.’

Darren shrugged. ‘Okay boss. We’ll search above deck, you guys check below. How’s that sound?’

‘Sounds good,’ said Ana, already heading down the ramshackle steps below deck, Rachel following close behind. She took Ana’s arm.

‘You don’t really think we could be stuck out here, do you? ’

Ana did, but thought it best not to say. ‘Of course not. Paul will have the coast guard searching for us already.’

Rachel smiled. ‘Yeah.’ Then, more definitively, ‘Yeah.’

‘Come on, let’s get looking. And take your time. The longer we’re away from those arseholes, the better.’

‘You got any joints?’ she asked.

‘Nah. Must’ve left them on the beach. You not still high?’

She snuggled into the nook of his armpit. ‘Little bit. I’ve got a pick-me-up for when we start coming down.’

She glanced over at Bret. He was snoring softly in the shade, his baseball cap pulled down over his eyes.

‘It’s like that film,’ she said after a while.

‘What one?’ yawned Darren.

‘You know. The one on the boat.’

‘Zombie Flesheaters ?’

She shook her head, her hair rubbing against Darren’s chest. ‘Nah, the Sam Neill one, where they’re stuck on a boat with a maniac.’

Darren draped his arm over her shoulder. ‘Ah, Dead Calm .’

‘Yeah, that’s the one. Wouldn’t mind him coming to our rescue.’

‘He’s an old bastard now.’

Lisa considered this. ‘Oh yeah. Well, maybe if he came from the future.’

‘Then he’d be even older.’

Lisa nodded again. ‘Oh yeah.’

She looked out across the deck. Josh and Lillian lay entangled in each other’s limbs, Josh passionately nuzzling on his girlfriend’s neck, his hand on her bare breast. She saw him look over towards her and they briefly made eye contact. He smiled at her, then went back to Lillian. She could see his erection straining against his tight black underpants and he worked it loose with one hand.

‘Hey look, they’re fucking,’ she said to Darren.

‘Oh yeah,’ he said, barely interested. ‘Good for them.’

Lisa sighed and stretched and watched them, feeling nothing. The drugs had all but annihilated her sexual desire over the years. She knew Darren was a good looking guy, and under different circumstances they might have hooked up at least once in the last four years, but it had never happened and probably never would.

Not after that night.

It was six, maybe even seven years ago now. It hadn’t been her first time — Lisa had lost her virginity age fifteen to her then boyfriend, Trev, and it had been terrible for different reasons. No, this was years later, a random hookup on a night out in Brisbane, before she had ever met Darren or Bret.

The guy was nice. A lot older than her, but sweet. Oh, and loaded. The drinks were on him all night, and he plied her with enough booze to kill an elephant. They snorted some lines in the loo and went out dancing. There, they snaffled some pingers and lost track of time. They retired to the guy’s hotel room and snorted more lines, rubbing the residue on their gums, letting nothing go to waste.

The rest of the night she only remembered in elliptical flashes.

The man sliding her jeans down her legs.

His body pressed against hers, his face all sweaty.

The creeping sensation like a snake coiling into her guts .

Her own hand reaching for her bag as he fucked her, looking for something.

His red face buried between her breasts.

That thing inside of her.

The switchblade springing into life as she pressed the round silver button.

The surprise on his face as she cut it out of her.

Then there was the mess on the bed as she stood on the hotel balcony gazing out over the city, a half-smoked joint in one hand, a severed penis in the other, the face in the moon winking at her from the night sky.

She had woken up the next morning in her own bed, unsure of how she had found her way back, or if anything she remembered last night had even happened.

She stayed in bed all day, only getting up when her bladder could take it no more. By this point, she had convinced herself it was all a dream, the product of some pretty wild hallucinogens. She peed, then staggered naked through to the kitchen, where she hid her stash in a biscuit tin. As she stood by the breakfast bar rolling a joint, she noticed the smell. There was a brown paper bag on one of the wooden chairs. It was soaken wet, the red liquid seeping through onto the white cushion—

‘Hey Lisa,’ said Darren.

‘Huh?’ she replied.

‘I said, should we search the boat? We told them we would.’ He pressed a hand to her forehead. ‘You okay? You’re looking a little spacey.’

‘I’m fine,’ she said. She smiled at Darren to put him at ease. ‘Just on a comedown I reckon.’ She fished into her bra and pulled a small baggie of pills out.