Ezekiel finally used up all the pent-up energy from his escapade the previous night after we had sex a few times. By the third round, he rolled out of bed, took a shower, and emerged with his usual perfect composure ten minutes later. I’d only managed to slip into some underwear.
“Where are you going?” I asked, pulling the sheets up to my waist.
“Business.”
“Oh.” I shouldn’t have expected him to say anything more specific. He swiveled around to face me, jaw set, hair in place. Sometimes I wondered if he were some sort of magician, changing demeanors in an instant to suit every situation. It impressed me as much as it frightened me.
“Don’t sound so crestfallen.” He ran a comb through his hair again for good measure. “I’ve arranged for entertainment.”
“Oh?”
“Roger is taking you to the zoo.”
I almost snorted, but thank goodness I didn’t. The zoo? Was I ten or something? Still, I wasn’t going to complain. I hadn’t been to the zoo since I was five. I’d almost forgotten what a giraffe looked like in real life. I remembered them as gigantic, but was that because they were so big or because I was so small?
“It seems you’ve taken quite a liking to Roger. Is that true?”
I didn’t want Ezekiel jumping to any jealous conclusions, so I shrugged. “He’s all right.”
“I specifically chose him to guard you because I knew he’d grow attached, and that means a great deal when I need you protected. I can’t have a bodyguard willing to put you in the line of fire.”
It shocked me how little concern Ezekiel showed over my relationship with Roger. Blade glared at every single man who looked at me, including the sixty-year-old hobo who slept on my apartment steps occasionally. It had never made any sense to me, considering Blade also knew how I made the majority of my money. Perhaps for him it was “out of sight, out of mind.” As long as he didn’t have to see it, he could pretend I was his virtuous girlfriend who never harbored a single thought about another man.
“His actions last night confirmed him as a proper choice.” He nodded sharply. “Wouldn’t you agree, Melissa?”
It was an absolute statement, not a question. I shook my head. “I like Roger. Thank you.”
Ezekiel reached into a bag by the bed and pulled out a pistol, which he shoved in his shoulder holster. He took another one and slipped it into pocket of his jacket. “Very well. Enjoy your time at the zoo. I’m going to be back around six o’clock if I can. You’ll eat with me at the Diamond Palace, and we’ll see a show afterward.”
“Sounds great.”
Ezekiel moved toward the door, paused, and turned back. He took my shoulder in a hand and pulled me forward to plant his mouth on mine. It was the softest kiss since he’d come in this morning. I was right in assuming violence turned Ezekiel on. Or maybe it wasn’t the violence—maybe it was power.
“Be ready by six o’clock, understand?” he said, pulling back.
“Of course.”
“You’re always punctual.” His thumb slipped across my bottom lip and chin. “I’ve not regretted my choice to hire you yet. You’re an exceptional woman, Melissa.”
That was the biggest compliment I could ask for from Ezekiel, and I knew that making a big deal out of it wouldn’t please him. So I nodded and whispered a gentle thank-you.
Nothing more was said. Ezekiel left, already yanking out his cellphone. Roger showed up five minutes later.
I grinned. “So. The zoo, right?”
* * *
“I don’t recall the zoo being this depressing.” I took a slurp from my drink as I watched the polar bear pace back and forth in his tiny space, panting and agitated. I could sympathize with him. I knew what it was like to be trapped in a life you couldn’t escape. At least the temperature was comfortable. Although I feared the polar bear wasn’t faring so well in the heat.
I was dressed in shorts for the first time since Ezekiel hired me. I figured there was nothing wrong with it, because I’d have plenty of time to slip into something more appropriate by six o’ clock. Now I could sit how I liked, and my feet were in comfortable sneakers, ones Roger bought me on the way over.
Roger was still in a suit, and I’d teased him during our drive.
“You aren’t blending in very well.”
“That’s not the point. Ezekiel would kill me if he saw me in business casual.”
“Can you at least take off the jacket? You must be dying in the heat.”
He’d refused at the time, but now the jacket was off, tucked in the crook of his elbow. He’d rolled his sleeves up his forearms, drawing attention to his hands.
“Roger?” I asked, taking my eyes from the polar bears.
“What?”
“Why aren’t you wearing a ring?”
“What?”
I pointed to his left hand. “No ring.”
“I’m not married.”
“You aren’t?”
“Wait.” Roger turned eyes to me. “What do you know?”
“Um…” I rubbed the back of my neck and pressed my lips together. “You see, the thing is…when I took your wallet out, it kind of flipped open and I saw—I saw a wedding photo. So if you aren’t married, that means…”
Roger sighed heavily. “Okay, then I am married.”
“What?”
“Look, Ezekiel doesn’t want people knowing about my personal life. That’s why I take off the ring for work. But look.” He dug beneath his collar and pulled out a gold ring on a string that was unmistakably the kind given in marriage. “I wear this when I’m not at work.”
“So you are married? Your wife isn’t—”
“She’s alive, yeah.”
“And you’re together.”
“Yes.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Again, because Ezekiel didn’t want anyone to know. It’s dangerous. If people know you have loved ones, they can be targeted. And that would not only endanger her, but also Ezekiel, and me, as well. So as far as anyone knows, all of his employees have no friends, no family, and no lovers. It’s easiest that way.”
There was hypocrisy in that, of course. Ezekiel had me, and I was most obviously a lover. He wasn’t keeping me a secret. But perhaps that was the point. I was his trophy courtesan, the woman he paraded around to prove to other men that he could.
“What?” Roger asked when I stared at him.
“I just can’t see you—you’re married?”
Roger snorted. “That shocking, huh? Well, there are some women who find this mug attractive, be they few and far between.”
I didn’t reply. Roger wasn’t exactly hard on the eyes, but I wouldn’t admit that to him.
“You’re really that surprised?” Roger asked, amused by my silence.
“I just…I don’t know. Somehow you don’t seem like the marriage type. You work for Ezekiel. I mean, come on…”
Roger sobered. “Let’s keep moving.”
We went below to watch the sharks swim in their pool. The crowd was strangely sparse down there. I watched a hammerhead sway about leisurely, moving across the glass until he turned at the edge and swam behind a rock. They all looked far more peaceful than the poor polar bears. It was like they didn’t know they were swimming in a tiny tank instead of a big ocean. Hell, they probably didn’t care. I envied them for that.
“Her name’s Bahiya.” Roger crossed his arms and leaned against the wall opposite the sharks. “We’ve been married about a year now.”
“Oh.” There was nothing I could think of to say. Roger’s voice was even, but I noticed a tidbit of affection there. Most people I knew growing up weren’t married, and if they were, they weren’t as happy as Roger sounded.
Roger uncrossed his arms and shoved his hands in his pockets. “You said you saw the picture in my wallet?”
“Yeah.”
“She was born in Jahral, but she came over when she was sixteen. So she still has a bit of the accent.”
“She’s really pretty.” Well, she was. Jahralian women tended to be like that. Maybe it was just a stereotype, but almost every Jahralian woman I’d ever met was good-looking. The men were, too. Something about their purple eyes gave them a certain mystique.
“She is.”
“How’d you meet?” Judging by Roger’s tone, there was a dark side to this story, but I wanted to linger on the happy details a little longer.
“I probably shouldn’t tell you.”
“Come on.” I smiled in encouragement, perching my butt on the edge of the cement bench poking out from the tank glass. “Tell me. Are you afraid of me judging you or something? I’m a druggie prostitute. Doesn’t give me much room to judge.”
“Fine. We met at a local alcoholics’ therapy group.”
“An…you were an alcoholic?”
“Yeah. Sort of.” Roger chuckled. “Not a hardcore one, but it’s really embarrassing to think about. I got arrested on a harassment charge because I beat up some guy when I was drunk. I was let out with a fine and I had to attend ten of these therapy sessions with a bunch of other guys. Well, Bahiya was our counselor. She’d never been an alcoholic, but apparently her father had, so she was emotionally invested in the whole thing.”
“I have a hard time believing this. You look some kind of weird nerd.”
“Hey,” Roger chided playfully with a smile. “Be nice.”
I slipped my hands between my thighs, leaning forward with interest. “So you aren’t a weird nerd?”
“I can be. I like some nerdy stuff, but ever since I was little, I’ve always gotten into trouble. All through school I was sent to the office for beating up kids who made fun of me. I just couldn’t keep my fists to myself. I was quite a wild kid in high school, so that’s why my parents suggested the army. They thought it would do me some good. And it did, I think. You only have to kill one man before you never want to hurt a person again.” He sobered halfway through the story and cleared his throat. “Though I guess you’ve seen for yourself how I tend to have a knack for hurting people.”
“I’m sorry.”
Roger’s breath rattled when he sighed. “I’m dealing with it. I use excuses to feel better about it. Most of the people who attack Ezekiel are low-lifes. So far, I haven’t had to injure any innocents.”
“So what does your wife think of you working for Ezekiel?”
“She doesn’t know about it.”
“Wh—she doesn’t? How can she not notice something like you being gone for weeks on end?”
Roger wouldn’t look at me. “She’s sick.”
“Oh.”
“She’s been in and out of the hospital for about eight months now. She told me she was sick before I proposed to her. In some way, I feel like I proposed because she was sick, and I didn’t want to waste any time.”
“When you say sick…”
“Brain cancer.”
“Oh. Wow.”
“It’s a constant battle, both physical and emotional. One day the doctors tell her she’s gonna pull through fine, and then other days the doctors say they don’t have hope. She’s a wreck, I’m a wreck. At first we thought—” Roger took a deep breath. “At first we thought she wouldn’t make it. Not with such catastrophic hospital bills. The government laid me off because of budget cuts, so I didn’t have a job, and she couldn’t keep being a therapist, as ill as she was. We thought—we thought the hospitals would turn us away and she’d have to die.”
It all made sense now. A great sense of sobriety overtook me, and my heart ached. Oh, Roger.
“Ezekiel,” I whispered. “So that’s why you work for him.”
“He found me and promised to pay all the bills if I became an employee.”
Tears rose to my eyes, not so much over Roger’s ailing wife, but because this was such a common story in Metro. A relative or lover got sick. No one could afford the bills. They started trafficking drugs or selling sex to pay for it all. Our own mortality was rubbed in our faces every day, and the only way to shake it off was to sell yourself. Sell your body so someone else can keep theirs. It was a vicious cycle no one wanted to address. They told Metro to take care of itself. You guys got yourselves into this nasty business, the rest of the city told its slums. Get yourselves out.
“So far, he’s kept his word. I haven’t told Bahiya about Ezekiel. I’m not allowed to. I wouldn’t want to anyway. If she knew…” Roger shook his head. “She thinks I have a security job keeping enthusiastic fan girls off a local celebrity.” He snorted. “She’s been suspicious as to why it pays so well, but honestly, she’s got so many other worries that she’s just thankful money isn’t an issue anymore.”
“I’m sorry, Roger.”
“It isn’t your fault.”
“I know. I’m just saying…”
“How do you think Ezekiel knows? How do you think he zeroes in on desperate people and takes advantage of them?”
“That’s how he’s made so much money so far.” I hugged myself. “Knowing weaknesses and targeting them.” I met his gaze. “So how’s your drinking record been since Bahiya?”
Roger chuckled grimly. “She made sure I was high and dry, and I’m kind of glad. Ezekiel would never tolerate a drunkard in his employment. I haven’t touched alcohol in two years. I don’t miss it much.”
I was proud of Roger. What was it like to tackle an addiction and win? I wish I had the bravery to try. If Ezekiel hadn’t dangled drugs in front of me, would he have achieved such control?
“It wasn’t easy,” Roger stated, watching my expression. “But I had my parents and Bahiya behind me. Couldn’t have done it without their help.”
I thought of Mimi. She’d love to see me off the drugs, but as far as helping me… I didn’t think she had the willpower. However, my girls at work could help me through it—at least the ones who weren’t addicted. Cordelia couldn’t help, but Yogi and the older ladies could. A few of them beat their own drug addictions. Too bad I couldn’t go to them now. I missed them.
“Do you have more pictures? I’d like to look at them.”
Roger handed me his phone. I’d grown used to my own high-tech device by now, so I had little trouble finding the photo album. And while I wasn’t much of a sentimentalist, I wanted to aww at some of the pictures. He and Bahiya did look very happy and cute together. I never imagined Roger as much of a romantic, but whenever the camera caught him looking at his wife, I saw love in his eyes. To me, it seemed like a good marriage.
Then again, what did I know about good marriages? No one I knew had one.