CHAPTER ELEVEN

Pretty Men

 

“This won’t work,” Marcus said. “We’re dead men. I don’t know why I’m going along with this.”

“By Svyn’s balls, shut up and sit still,” I said as I applied ink to the last bare patch on Marcus’s forehead. “This plan is pure genius.”

“Dressing up as the Dark Legion, and walking through the door… that is your idea of genius? What makes you think this has any chance of working?”

“Because it’s unexpected,” I said. “Who in their right mind would even contemplate pulling off such a stunt? Because it’s unthinkable, they won’t think of it.”

“You don’t think that two men walking up in ladies’ bathrobes, claiming to be Inquisitors, will be suspicious? You’re mad.”

Marcus was shivering in the cold of night. I refused his requests to get dressed; he had to wait for the ink to dry. You’d think a termite colony had made itself at home in his crotch with how much he was fidgeting. Granted, it had been two hours since I’d started, but still, he wasn’t making it any easier.

When we arrived back at our room from the port, we found it empty. Kaleb was gone. All he’d left were his discarded bandages. I couldn’t help but worry about the kid, but he’d taken his life into his own hands. He had every right to it, and at least he had his own life to live, however short it may be. I hoped he was on his way to the Great Oasis. I took a step back from Marcus to get a good look at my work.

“In the full light of day, this probably wouldn’t work. But, in the middle of the night, they’ll be too busy shitting themselves to take a closer look.”

“Like you did this morning?”

“Exactly.”

“Why are you so scared of the Inquisition?” Marcus asked. “I thought they had to hand over the biggest, baddest prisoners to you for interrogation?”

“They scare me because they love what they do. They live for it, and what’s worse is that they believe in it.”

I stepped back to add the finishing touches. I’d already painted my own skin, and I reckoned I’d done a good job of it. My hands, wrists, ankles, neck and face were covered in tiny letters. I wondered if I could have gotten away with just painting them black, especially on Marcus, whose skin was just a shade darker than the ink. But I decided not to leave things to chance. I had strong doubts about the bathrobes, though. We’d found the biggest ones we could, and I’d still had to extend Marcus’s. I could not help but see them as the ladies’ robes that they were, but I refused to admit as much to Marcus. I was nervous, but also excited. I could have the crown and ring in my hands this very night.

“Done,” I said, rolling my shoulders.

“How much time have we got?”

“About an hour. Let’s get ready.”

 

The bell struck for curfew, and not long after, I opened the service door at the rear of the inn to peer out. I smiled at Marcus over my shoulder. Malvin was waiting on top of a fabulous carriage. We walked around the carriage to marvel at it. The horses, too, were kitted with full regalia, feathers on their heads and all. Malvin was sitting up top, dressed as smartly as the horses. He had a huge grin on his face and Marcus gave him a thumbs up as he climbed in behind me.

The carriage set off for the port, and I smiled at Marcus. There was a chance that my crazy plan might actually work. All the parts needed to fit and the carriage tied them together. I felt much better about it now that the plan had been set in motion.

As we turned a corner, the carriage came to a halt. I pulled open the curtain, and peered out. “Legion patrol,” I said. “Three men.”

“Halt! Stay where you are,” a legionnaire bellowed. “Who do you think you are to break the emperor’s curfew?”

“Follow my lead.” I whispered, stepping out of the carriage. We had rehearsed a few things in the event that we were stopped. I just hoped Marcus could play his part without laughing. I strutted like a peacock, walking a circle around the guards, one at a time. The men looked terrified, eyes on the ground. Marcus stood to the side with his arms crossed. “Who are you to question us?” I asked. “You dare interrupt the emperor’s business? Grovel at my feet… and I shall contemplate your fate.” The men fell to their knees, groveling like none had groveled before. “Is it that you harbor a hatred for our beloved emperor? Do you desire to dislodge the gears of his machinations?” I tapped a finger to my lips in mock contemplation. “Why do you seek his displeasure? Answer me, you maggots!”

“We… we were just doing our job, Inquisitor. Doing our service to the emperor. We didn’t know…. “

“Silence! What think you, brother? Do we spare them? Or hasten their journey to the final day?” I asked of Marcus.

“Their day of judgment will come soon enough, brother. Leave them to serve the Beloved as best they can for now,” Marcus said.

“So be it,” I said. “As always, you are the embodiment of our emperor’s forgiveness, brother. Stand, and be gone!” I said to the legionnaires, then climbed back into the carriage.

Marcus followed me, closed the door, and let out a deep breath. “Gods!” Marcus said.

“You convinced yet?” I asked. I could not believe how well that had worked.

Marcus nodded. “I’m impressed.”

I was too.

 

The carriage pulled up to the side of the warehouse. Marcus and I stepped out and walked to the door with purpose. Past the warehouse, I could make out the imperial ship some distance off the coast, and I thought I could hear the sound of laughter, even at that distance. The guards were cowering long before we reached them. “Open the door and stand aside,” I said with all the authority I didn’t have.

The guard on the left glanced at the other, but he was already reaching for it. We walked through, and I turned to the guards. “Do not come in here unless we ask for you. Close the door!” When the doors were shut, we smiled at each other, and Marcus hugged me. I didn’t mind for once, and could not believe that my crazy plan was actually working. “You need to read more coffee grains,” I whispered. I pushed the man off me and gestured for him to follow.

There was a large empty space at the center of the warehouse, with the massive crates lined up along the walls. There was an unusual smell about the place, but I wasn’t sure what from. The crates were even bigger than they’d looked from a distance. Moonlight trickled through small windows set high against the ceiling. I stopped in front of a crate and looked up at it.

“Why are there holes drilled along the top of the panel?” I asked.

“Don’t know. Maybe there are screws hidden within them. Does it matter?”

“I suppose not. Where do we start?”

“This one is as good as any other,” Marcus said as he moved closer to investigate. “Look,” he said, gesturing to the side of the crate. “There are large knobs on the side of the panel. Must be for opening it without destroying it.” Marcus started turning them counterclockwise. There were four per side. “I can’t reach the top ones. Come here—I’ll boost you to the top. There may be more above.”

I crouched on top and quickly turned the last two knobs. The top of the crate had a multitude of drilled holes. They contained no screws, and a faint, but horrible smell was wafting up at me. A realization dawned on me as I turned the last knob. “Erm… Marcus. I don’t think these crates contain what we hoped they did.”

“Why?” Marcus asked.

Thud.

The front panel fell to the ground and kicked up dust particles that glowed in the moonlight. It looked as though we were surrounded by a multitude of stars. A high-pitched squeal came from the crate, which rocked as something heavy knocked against the inside.

Marcus leaned into the crate to get a better look. Then his eyes went wide. “Gods!” He turned and ran to the far side of the warehouse, drawing his dagger as he turned. I wished we could have found a way to hide Marcus’s short sword in the robes. The Inquisition often had rapiers, but never something as crude as a short sword.

A massive reptile stepped out of the crate, and the crate shook with each step it took. It had three large horns, and a large bony wedge extended from the top of its head. It was big. Though Marcus was tall, he could have walked beneath its belly with a slight bow. The beast turned toward him. It snorted, and the air from its nostrils sent another cloud of dust into the air. It tossed its head, then charged.

Marcus ran toward it. I thought that he was overestimating his abilities. The beast was massive, and those horns! But when he was a couple of meters away from it, he went onto his knees, sliding beneath the beast as it swung its head to gore him. As he slid beneath it, he reached up and thrust his dagger, cutting a long wound along its belly. The blade snapped at the hilt halfway along the creature. The reptile’s momentum carried it ever forward, and it collided with another crate, smashing a panel. It dropped to the ground, but its legs still moved, trying to stand back up. Even with its entrails lying beneath it, it came close to finding its feet, but it collapsed again, dying.

Marcus looked at the hilt still in his hand and tossed it over his shoulder. He rested his hands on his knees, breathing heavily. “Gods!” he said. “That was close.”

“Behind you!” I shouted. Another reptile was stepping out of the crate with the smashed panel. It charged at Marcus, and Marcus ran. The creature did not stop chasing, and Marcus kept running. They ran in circles around the warehouse, though he seemed to outpace it easily enough. The man was ridiculously fast. The ground shook beneath the creature, and it was agitating those contained in the other crates. The crates now looked far too flimsy to contain the hulk of muscle and horn that shook the ground beneath me, and the crate that was my pavilion swayed when it passed. I doubted they would last if the other creatures became determined.

“Open the door,” I shouted, hoping the guards would comply.

“What?” Marcus yelled as he passed me for the fifth time. It was damn loud in there.

“Open the Gods-damned door!” I shouted, pointing at the door.

Marcus put some extra distance between himself and the beast and grabbed the door as he ran past, opening it. The guards were gathered around the door to eavesdrop. Not surprising, considering the racket we made. Most ran when they saw what was happening, but one lagged behind, and the reptile collided with him. He was impaled on one of the beast’s horns, but I suspected he would have died from the impact regardless. The rest of the guards ran for their lives, and the reptile chased them down the street.

I hung from the crate, then dropped the rest of the way to the ground. Upon leaving the warehouse, I found the area deserted. The legion and reptile were some distance down the street. Another man lay trampled in the dirt.

“What now?” Marcus asked.

“I don’t know,” I said. “It doesn’t look like they unloaded my cargo.” I looked out across the water. The imperial ship, anchored some distance off, was silhouetted by the moon behind it.

“Stop it,” Marcus said.

“What?”

“Stop thinking about boarding that ship.”