Umi gave birth to me
at home
She has a video
and every birthday
she makes me watch
When I was little
I would run away
Umi would laugh and say
Come here, boy
You gotta remember
where you came from!
She’d chase me around
that small apartment
and I’d cover my eyes and
pretend to be gagging
That’s nasty, Mama, I’d say
That’s life, Amal
You have to respect it
she’d say
Umi was in this inflatable pool
in the middle of our living room
with the midwife next to her
My father was holding the camera
She was taking deep fire breaths
eyes closed tight, not even screaming
almost praying
Then the midwife plunged
both her hands into the pool
And then
there I was rising out of water
Squirming little brown thing
barely crying
big eyes wide
as if I’d already done this before
as if I’d already been here before
Umi says
I was born with an
old, old soul