In middle school
I wanted to be a hallway monitor
so badbut there were rules
You had to have at least an eighty-five average
barely absent from school
perfect uniform every single day
and a mom who brings cookies to PTA meetings
I didn’t check off any of those boxes
so me and my boys
clowned all the hallway monitors
even the girls
We threw balled-up paper at them
smacked the backs of their heads
threatened them if they snitched
So when one of them did tell on us
we got suspended for a week
and were assigned our own monitors
for another week because we were on
probation
You have to learn to respect authority
even if that authority is your peer
the principal, Mr. Johnson, said with that deep voice
Umi thought this was a good school
and she tried so hard to get me in—
But I’m thinking it should’ve been called
Zero Tolerance Academy
or
No Second Chances Charter School
or
Prison Prep