Chapter 30, Minneapolis, 1987

YOU ARE SUCH A BITCH

“I can’t believe it! My dreams have come true!” I tell my best friend, Steph, over the phone. She laughs with excitement for me and tells me she’ll see me soon. Bruce McCoy, whom I have had a crush on since the sixth grade, has asked me out to a movie with a group of our theater friends, Steph included. This is the best news of my life! It’s a last minute plan…he’s picking me up in an hour…what will I wear? I have NOTHING to wear! No one is home, and I run down to the laundry room to see if my favorite gray Norma Kamali pants are clean. They are - hurray! The shirt I like to wear with them, however, is not…ugh. I run back to my bedroom. There has to be something that will work…I find myself walking by Carolyn’s bedroom. I peek my head in. She has left her lights on and I see, folded on the foot of her brass bed, her new green Ralph Lauren sweater. It’s perfect. It would look so good with my favorite gray pants. I sit on her bed next to the sweater. Her comforter is slippery sateen, and I slide closer to the folded sweater. It’s a sign. I’m supposed to wear the sweater.

“You look great,” Bruce says when he comes to the door. Bruce is six-foot-four and towers over my five-foot-two frame. He is wearing jeans and a button-up white shirt and black belt. His hair is black and slightly curled.

“Oh, thanks,” I casually respond, smiling the entire way to his car. It’s chilly out, but I hold my peacoat so Bruce will notice Carolyn’s awesome sweater that I’m wearing. He opens the car door for me, and I sink into the oversized bucket seat of his gray and black AMC Eagle. It’s warm inside, and Janet Jackson plays quietly on the stereo. Bruce touches my knee before he puts the car in gear. “I’m glad you’re coming with us,” he says. My heart flutters. The touch of his hand sends chills up my leg.

After the movie, Steph convinces Bruce to drop her off first and me last, despite the fact she lives less than a mile from his house. This is one of the many reasons she is my best friend. “Oh shit, look at the time,” she tells us both as we hop into the Eagle. “My mom’s gonna shoot me. I was supposed to be home ten minutes ago to watch my little sister! Bruce, would you mind dropping me off before Lila? I know it’s out of the way for you to backtrack by our neighborhood, but pleeeeease. It would save me!”

“No problem,” Bruce says.

Alone, parked in front of my house, all I can see is the glow of the street lamp as it hits the snow bank at the bottom of our large front hill. Bruce walks around to the passenger side of his car and offers a hand to help me out of the bucket seat. It’s softly snowing, and snowflakes land on our eyelashes. He helps me over the snowbank to the icy sidewalk, both of us slipping a bit and grabbing onto one another so we don’t fall to the ground.

“I got it from here,” I say at the base of our stairs. “I can hold the railing so I won’t slip.” My parents think I’m with Steph, not Bruce, and the last thing I want is a confrontation. “I had a really great time,” I say nervously.

“Me too,” Bruce says as he tucks my shoulder-length hair behind my ear. “We should do this, just us, next time.”

“Yeah…cool…I’d love that…” I say sheepishly. Bruce suddenly picks me up and puts me on the first step of the staircase.

“You’re much easier to kiss this tall,” he whispers, putting his hand on my cheek. I giggle. When he kisses me my whole body tingles. His big arms wrap around the top of my hips. It feels like our kisses last forever. I float up the staircase towards the front door, noticing he is watching me until I disappear at the first landing. I hear his motor start, and his car peel away from the curb.

As I reach the front door, I notice a huge pile of clothing. This seems strange. Why is there a pile of clothes outside while it’s snowing? I realize it’s MY clothing. Suddenly, the front door opens. It’s Carolyn. She is holding my pink and green Laura Ashley bedding and she is visibly very, very mad. “You are such a bitch!” she yells. “Enjoying my new sweater? The one I never even wore yet?” She throws my bedding on top of the clothing, which is now snow-covered..

“I’m so sorry, Carolyn. I had nothing to wear and Bruce McCoy FINALLY asked me out!”

“I don’t give a shit if Prince himself asked you out, Lila! I bought that sweater with my own money. It was a fortune and call me CRAZY, but I wanted to be the FIRST to wear it.” Carolyn slams the glass storm door and goes inside. I follow her. Turning around before she heads back up the stairs, she yells “take it off…NOW!” I take it off. I am standing in the front hall in my bra and gray pants. It’s freezing, and I fold my arms in front of me to stay warm. “You’re a bitch,” she says again. “I may have to love you because you’re my sister, but I don’t like you at all right now!” She marches up the staircase, the green sweater in hand, and at the top, slams her bedroom door. I plop down on the bottom stair, head in my hands, and begin to sob.