jake’s notebook
Wednesday 18th December
Days since Mum disappeared got sick: Three
Days until Christmas: Seven
things i would rather forget:
- Mum being sick
- Neil knowing Mum is sick
- Everyone at school knowing Mum is sick
- Running away the night Mum got sick
- The ambulance taking Mum away
The next day I didn’t feel ANY BETTER. In fact, I was feeling MUCH, MUCH WORSE. Instead of springing out of bed when I woke up, I promptly rolled over and tried to go back to sleep, but thoughts of the evening before kept CRASHING OVER ME and refused to LET ME REST.
As I lay in bed, hidden beneath the duvet, I tried to push out the thoughts that threatened to DROWN ME if I let them. I knew I shouldn’t care what other people thought but I couldn’t face everyone at school, knowing that they all knew that MUM WAS SICK.
There, I’d admitted it. MUM WAS SICK. I’d known it all along but refused to let it in. I was TOO EMBARRASSED to face up to THE FACTS. That I’d run away like that and let the ambulance take her. There was no use denying it any longer. I cocooned myself further into the duvet, hoping I could bury myself there for the rest of the day.
Perhaps if I hid for long enough, Rose and Grandma would forget about me and I wouldn’t have to face anyone, at least for today. If I stayed hidden in my room, I could pretend that everything was BACK TO NORMAL and that MUM WAS FINE.
When no one came to look for me, I stuck my head out to check the time. It was already ten o’clock. I had SLEPT IN. Perhaps my plan had worked and they really had forgotten about me. Beside the clock on my bedside table I could see my notebook glaring up at me ACCUSINGLY. I couldn’t face all my thwarted plans right now.
Still wrapped up in the duvet like a MASSIVE BURRITO-SHAPED SUMO WRESTLER, I struggled out of bed and peered onto the landing. It was empty. The doors to all the other rooms stood slightly ajar as if they were waiting for something to happen.
I felt like I had stumbled into an APOCALYPSE. Where was everyone? I didn’t think I could cope with any more MISSING PERSONS. The warmth of the duvet was a comforting reminder that if I wanted to, I could crawl back to bed and carry on pretending that EVERYTHING WAS FINE.
In the end my curiosity got the better of me and I decided to go downstairs. Once I’d managed to untangle myself from the MOUNTAIN OF BEDDING that is. It was starting to become unpleasantly hot in there anyway.
I left the duvet in an INELEGANT PILE on the floor. I’d tidy up the mess later. Once freed of its HEAVY ENCUMBRANCE (weight), I felt light as a feather and ran down the stairs to find Grandma.
‘Jake, is that you?’ Grandma called.
I could hear the clatter of pots and pans coming from the kitchen. Even over all that racket, Grandma had heard me coming. I hadn’t exactly been incognito on my way down.
‘Aren’t you at work?’ I asked her as I rushed through the door. ‘Why didn’t anyone wake me up for school?’
‘I’m supposed to be on nights this week, but I’ve taken a few days’ leave to keep a closer eye on you and your sister. Just until things settle down a bit.’
‘What about school?’ I asked.
‘Don’t you worry, you’ll be going back tomorrow. I can promise you that.’
I wasn’t sure what to say. I did my best impression of a STUNNED GOLDFISH as my mouth opened and closed but no words came out. Things must have been very serious for Grandma to let me stay at home.
‘You’re not to worry about your mum. She’s in the best place possible and she’ll be home before you know it.’
Grandma must have noticed my startled expression.
‘Before Christmas?’ I asked.
‘We’ll see. But soon, I promise. Now eat your breakfast, you must be starving.’
Turns out that whilst I was fast asleep upstairs, Grandma had been PREPARING A TOTAL FEAST. PANCAKES for BREAKFAST. What a TREAT. Rose was going to be so jealous when I told her later.
‘Thanks, Grandma,’ I said, as I shovelled the deliciousness into my mouth as quickly as humanly possible.
Grandma tousled my hair affectionately. I had to admit that things felt a lot calmer at home without Mum there. No late-night musical recitals, arguments or weird questions. I missed her, though. She might be a BIT STRANGE sometimes, but she was still MY MUM.
‘When you’ve finished eating, you can wash up.’
I sighed. I should have known a day off wouldn’t be a chance to be lazy with Grandma around.
‘And after that, you can tidy your room. There’s no need for standards to slip whilst your mum isn’t here.’
It was going to be a VERY BUSY DAY. Grandma was putting me to work. I knew I’d be desperate to get back to school the next day for a proper rest after all this. I had thought I would be able to play computer games in bed all day if I wanted to. So much for that.
Perhaps if she let me have A MOMENT’S PEACE, I could find some time to work out what was going on with Lukas. Now I knew where Mum was, and I’d had a chance to calm down, I knew I needed to put things right with my best friend.
‘You can do your schoolwork when Rose gets home. I’ve asked her to pick up anything you’ve missed from your teachers.’
Not only was I going to have to WORK ALL DAY, but ALL EVENING too. LIFE WAS SO UNFAIR. At least I had MY HUGE STACK OF PANCAKES to console me. And I didn’t have to deal with Neil or anyone else at school for A WHOLE DAY.
I spent the rest of the morning following Grandma’s orders to the letter so as not to get into any trouble for having a day off school. I did spend a bit of time reading one of my space books which is SOMEWHAT EDUCATIONAL after all.
In the afternoon Grandma finally took a nap and I couldn’t put off thinking about what was happening between me and Lukas any longer. I pulled out my notebook, took a deep breath and on a fresh blank page, started to write a new list.
plan to make up with lukas:
- Find out why Lukas has been acting so strangely
- Work out when Lukas and Nora became such good friends
- Ask Lukas what happened on Monday after school
- Tell Lukas about Mum being in hospital and why I have been so distracted recently
- Promise to be a proper best friend in future
I felt a TINY BIT BETTER once I’d written down my thoughts but now I couldn’t avoid the truth, it was STARING back at me in black and white. I had been a TERRIBLE FRIEND.
I had ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA what was happening in Lukas’s life. And I was starting to think SOMETHING SERIOUS must be going on in order for Lukas to act so STRANGELY.
When Rose finally came home at FOUR O’CLOCK I was COMPLETELY EXHAUSTED and ready to go back to sleep.
‘Here’s all your homework,’ Rose said, as she dumped the most humongous pile of papers on my bed where I had been taking a short break after cleaning my room hiding from Grandma. ‘Hope your day off was worth it!’
Needless to say, I spent the rest of the evening catching up on schoolwork. Grandma even brought dinner up to my room so I could eat at my desk.
By the time I was ready for bed, I couldn’t wait to get back to school the next day, even if it meant having to face Lukas and deal with Neil’s snide remarks. At least the teachers are a lot more forgiving than Grandma.