Without Faith
Paul Curtis was a soldier on the deadly beaches of Anzio. In May 1944 he wrote to his brother, Mitchell, back home in Oak Ridge, Tennessee. Mitchell had asked him to describe his feelings about being in combat, and Paul did his best:
I have seen some action a few hard, hard days in which I saw more than I imagined I ever would. I don’t think any man can exactly explain combat. It’s beyond words. Take a combination of fear, anger, hunger, thirst, exhaustion, disgust, loneliness, homesickness, and wrap that all up in one reaction and you might approach the feelings a fellow has. It makes you feel mighty small, helpless, and alone… Without faith, I don’t see how anyone could stand this.243
I am struck by two words in Paul Curtis’ letter: fear and loneliness. Everyone in combat experiences fear. This is a natural reaction whenever death or injury is a possibility. I don’t know if everyone experiences loneliness in combat, but I know that I found myself in this state frequently. As an officer, I never felt free to share my deeper thoughts with the men in my unit or with superior officers, and there were rarely fellow company commanders nearby. This left me alone on most occasions with my own fears and uncertainties.
Like Curtis, I now find it hard to see how anyone could stand combat or any other crisis of life without faith. With faith, fear of dying may still exist, but death itself is no threat when you have confidence in the reality of God’s eternal kingdom. Loneliness also becomes a non-issue when you have a relationship with God and are able to lift up your concerns to him in prayer. I regret that I did not have such faith while in combat. I would have been a more confident human being and a more effective leader.
Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.
—Hebrews 11:1