Chapter Three

After my first week at Oakwood High, I’m seriously not in the mood to deal with people anymore. I’m in classes with Ian and at least one of his crew. The subtle shots and digs at me while the teachers weren’t looking took their toll. My promise to Nana to not retaliate is working against me, and it’s making me look weak because I’m not fighting back.

I keep my promises, but they’re making it extremely hard.

“Hey, Yasir, what’s new with you?” Hearing Zahra’s voice calling out to me as I make my way to Storm throws me off balance a bit. I don’t even know this girl, and the fact that she affects me like this is not a good look.

I drop my bookbag in the backseat, then close the door. “Things are okay, I guess. You good?”

She blushes. “I’m doing okay. How are you adjusting to Oakwood?”

I shrug. “I’m doing the best I can, under the circumstances. I’m trying not to think about it right now. What’s on your mind?”

“I’m sorry. I’m a good listener if you need an ear to bend. Maybe we can figure out a way to help you. Word on campus is that you moved here from Atlanta, right?”

I offer up a nod, but I’m still not willing to bare my soul. “I’d rather not dwell on that, either. I just wanna get home and relax this weekend. I haven’t had a real moment to myself since I got down here.”

“So does that mean you won’t be at the game tonight?” Zahra blurts out before she places her fingers against her lips. She fumbles with her hands, and I’m wondering for the first time if I make her nervous. “I mean, it’s Rivalry Week, and I’m sure everyone will be there.”

Oh, for the love of… Is she kidding me right now? I rub the back of my head, jumping on the defensive before I realize what’s happening. “I have this thing about… I’m not sure… It’s probably pretty crowded and packed at the stadium, I assume, and I don’t know anyone.”

I fight every urge inside me to push her away as she reaches for my hand. I’m uncomfortable around her, but I’m craving her touch at the same time. What the hell is wrong with me? She stops for a moment, staring into my eyes with a curiosity that I don’t know how to describe. As she slips further inside my space, suddenly I’m as trapped in the moment as she is, and I don’t want her to go.

I pull away, snapping us out of our shared haze, but she still has this hopeful expression on her face. “I would love to see you there if you’re still not sure about going. Is there anything I can do to convince you to come through?”

Maybe it’s the way she says it, or maybe I just want to switch things up a bit, I don’t know, but I nod in response. “I’ll try to make it out there tonight, but only because you asked me.”

Zahra smiles and slips one of her fingers inside her honey-bronzed braids. “Great! I’ll be looking for you in the stands. We can even sit together if you’d like.”

“You don’t have to do that, Zahra.”

“Please, my friends call me Z.”

In that moment, I freeze. Okay, just like that, and she wants to be friends? Who is she trying to convince? Because it can’t possibly be me. It’s only the first week of school, and I haven’t been all that friendly around anyone. I still have to get a vibe and a rhythm, and it ain’t gonna happen in a few days.

I tilt my head toward my left shoulder and try not to frown, but I guess the tone of my voice gives me away. “Are we friends, Zahra? Like, deadass.”

I don’t mean to sound so rough, but I can’t help myself. She gives me a curious glance, biting her lip. “Um, well, would you like to be friends? I guess I shouldn’t have assumed.”

I’m stuck between giving her a hard time and wanting to apologize for being so edgy. Yeah, on second thought, I’m not ready to give in like that, not yet. “Okay, let’s not pretend here, because whatever this is between us and how fast it seems to have happened has me a bit confused. The way you look at me… It’s like you feel like you’ve known me, even though we’ve never laid eyes on each other before. I don’t know you.”

“Would you like to get to know me? As friends, Yasir? No cap.” She’s still leaning against my Jeep, allowing the question to linger between us. I open my mouth to say something else but stop myself the moment she gazes into my eyes again.

I can’t afford to let my guard down, but she’s not making it easy.

She leans in closer, almost like she doesn’t want to intrude any more than she has already. “May I?”

I nod as she places her hand against my cheek. She takes a deep breath, slowly exhaling as her gaze never leaves mine. “Tell me what’s on your mind, for real.”

What’s really on my mind, she asks? How about how I’m vibrating so intensely that I could start an earthquake? Or maybe why I feel so drawn to her, like there’s some mystical force that’s binding us together? I’m not supposed to be feeling this way, so why in the hell am I feeling this way?

And why can’t I tell her to remove her hand from my face?

“I’m sorry, I’m just on edge, and I shouldn’t have taken it out on you.” I sigh and close my eyes for a moment before opening them. I’m still stumped by one simple question. “Why are you being so nice to me? What makes me so special?”

She’s grinning now, keeping her hand steady. “I can’t explain what’s happening, either, but I know that, for some reason, I’ve developed strong feelings for you already… I hope they’re positive, because something tells me it would be a shame to not have the chance to get to know you better.”

When I pull her hand from my cheek and hold it, her eyes light up. I hold her hand a few more seconds longer than I’d planned, a smirk spreading across my face. Then, without warning, I’m taken prisoner inside of her stare again, but I’m willing to be captured this time. I feel warm, welcomed… I can’t wrap my head around the why, but I need to feel this again. The sooner, the better.

Then I check my watch and realize if I don’t get moving, I won’t be able to do much of anything later. I pull my key fob out to start the engine. “I hate to cut this short, but I have a few things to take care of at home so I can go to the game.”

She jumps as the rumble of the engine startles her, but she moves into my path to Storm’s hood, cutting me off from the driver’s side. “So you promise you’ll be there, right?”

For the first time since we started talking, I give a genuine smile. I almost forgot what that feels like. Maybe getting to know her—as a friend—might not be such a bad thing.

I hop in the driver’s seat, then roll down the window and pull out of the parking space. “I’ll see you later tonight.”

She’s grinning wide, and I try not to focus on the way her nose wrinkles up when she does that. She keeps playing with her braids, and now I’m really wondering if “just friends” is all she might be interested in.

…

Only one thing crosses my mind the moment I step through the door: I need to get everything done quick, fast, and in a hurry.

Where all this energy came from as I speed around the house acting like I want to break the sound barrier or get into the Guinness Book of World Records, I’ll never know.

Dishes. Done. Trash cleared throughout the house. Done. Bathroom cleaned. Done. Room cleaned. Done.

Wait a damn minute.

This can’t be life right now.

Yeah, I better come up with an explanation that Unk will believe, or I’ll end up in a question-and-answer session that could last hours. Ain’t nobody got time for that.

How in the world did I get here? I’m working through everything in my head, weighing the good and bad of heading out to the stadium tonight. I don’t want to admit that Zahra has some influence over my decisions, but look at me. The whole house got cleaned, including my room, so I can sit next to her at a football game. Who does that?

I glance down at the clock sitting next to my Black Panther replica helmet—Wakanda Forever!—doing my best to keep track of my timing to make sure I’m not rushing. I need to take a shower, get dressed and freshen up, then make it to the game. One look in the closet and I want to scream; I didn’t realize how much my nana’s paranoia affected my wardrobe. I mean, I know I can’t be flashy, flashy, but I’m not trying to go out looking all basic.

Maybe giving Storm a bath and wax will make me feel better.

I catch a rhythm, getting into a zone, thanks to the music piping through my AirPods, and the next thing I know, I burn through the wash in less than thirty minutes, and I still have time to put on a fresh coat of wax.

I immerse myself, watching Storm shine before my eyes against the waning sunlight. She’s gonna turn heads tonight. I can’t wait.

“Whoa, based on what I’ve seen inside, do we need to have a conversation?” Unk asks from the front porch.

I shake my head as I continue working. “Yo, how do you manage to pop up when I least expect it? And how did you get home without me seeing you? Is there a secret entrance I don’t know about?”

Unk strokes his goatee, and from the grin on his face, I see the punchline coming. “You probably got so lost in babying your ride and didn’t notice me drive right past you. I wonder if I should ask you to wash my truck, since you’re being so charitable. You got your Jeep looking niiiiccceee.”

I’ve got to do better about zoning out when I’m listening to my music. I give up a shrug, stretching my arm out to keep it loose. “Charitable, Unk? Nah, I just wanted to make sure I got her right before I get dressed and head out tonight.”

He tilts his head, a surprised expression on his face. “Oh really? And where are you heading, considering you never go out, even when I suggested it?”

I pause for a moment, squeezing the wax on the applicator, scrambling for a reason to give him. “I’m going to the football game tonight. I figure I might as well, since it’s Rivalry Week with Baytown High and all.”

Unk makes his way down the stairs from the porch, giving me a long glance. He raises his left eyebrow, then grins like he knows why I want to go out, but he doesn’t say anything. “So go and enjoy the game. You need to be a teenager for once instead of being caught up in whatever has been going on in your head.”

“Unk, I—”

“Hear me out, kiddo,” he interrupts, placing a hand on my shoulder. “For the past decade, we’ve been trying to play by your nana’s rules, presumably for your protection. In that time, thankfully, no one has come for you, which is a good thing. That means, as much as I bought into her paranoia, I have to admit that maybe we can loosen things up a bit.”

I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want to find out what life looked like with the shackles off. “I’m trying to figure it all out, and some things are easier than others. Just…I don’t know.”

“Speak on it, Ya-Ya. You know I got you.”

I scratch the back of my head. I hate going against my grandmother. She took me in when no one else could. Even the thought of it makes the hairs on my arms stand up. “You’re right; I’m not feeling whatever Nana was talking about, either. But maybe we can wait a little longer before I feel comfortable cutting loose?”

He gives my shoulder a squeeze, smiling the entire time. “I can understand that. I’m good with whatever you decide. Now, finish your wax and get moving. I have a few things to do myself.”

“Whoa, and what kind of plans do you think you have?” I tease. “Who told you it was okay to get a life?”

Unk laughs, and I laugh along with him. He leans against the front grill, it tickled him so much. “Oh my God, too funny, I swear. Okay, how about this: you tell me your real reason for heading to the game, and I’ll tell you what my real plans are.”

I put my hands up in mock surrender. “Nah, I’m not that curious. Have fun tonight, and I promise I’ll be home by curfew. Bright and early for the usual ride?”

“As always, kiddo. See you in the morning.”

…

“So you ain’t got time for your Day One no more, bro?”

Hearing Dante’s voice and seeing his face on the FaceTime feed while making the drive to the stadium is just what I need. Dante is my Day One; I’ve known him since I first came to the A. He is as close to a brother as I could get, and my nana treated him as such.

“Hey, what’s good, my boy? I’ve been trying to get my life down here. I feel like I’m in another country with all the madness going on.” I settle the phone on the hands-free car mount, rolling along at a steady pace to keep from bouncing the connection around too much.

“If I remember correctly, it wasn’t much of a life to get.” Dante chuckles. “At least Unk is good with all this. That whole deal with you getting bounced to live with him was foul. Squad been asking about you, though.”

Mentioning Squad…he had to know it would trigger me.

I didn’t have a chance to really get together with them to at least let them know where I was headed. I left that to Dante to explain it, which I guess wasn’t the best thing to do, now that I think about it. Everything happened so fast. All I can do now is move forward and hope they understood.

Most of them would. She probably didn’t.

“I’m planning to get back up there soon… I have some things I need to talk to Nana about,” I reply, avoiding the mention of Squad on purpose. “Once I’m up there, I’ll hit you so I can catch you up.”

“Where you rolling? And you got the top off, too? You trying to flex a bit, huh?” Dante asks. “Good thing we got that neon on there before you left. Otherwise you would have been better off just staying at home.”

“You’ll be all right, my boy. I’m always on my game, even if I have to play hide and seek,” I answer back, trying to watch the road and pay attention to the call at the same time. “I still have a few more tweaks to the engine to make, too. I’ve been scouting the comp, and there’s not too many that can keep up with Storm.”

“Well, with that hybrid HEMI we put together, what did you think was supposed to happen?” Dante boasts through the connection. “We knew she could decimate everything in her path outside of supercars once we got the proper calculations down. Enough of all that, though… I need to know if the girls are as hot as they say, bro. And don’t say you ain’t been peeping game, either.”

His focus on girls takes me straight to Zahra. I don’t know whether I want to be upset or happy about it, either. Even when I was at Douglass—my last school before I “transferred”—there was only one girl who had a shot at keeping my attention, and she had to work to even get me to look her way.

No wonder I’m so heated about what Zahra is doing to me. She hasn’t had to put in a second of work, and I’m already into her. “Yeah, there are some baddies in the mix down here, for real. That’s why I’m rolling to the game tonight. Oakwood has some rivalry game, and it’s supposed to bring out the cream of the crop, according to the boys I heard talking.”

“Good, because I have no intentions of bringing sand to the beach, you feel me?” His laughter is so infectious that I can’t resist jumping in with him. “I mean, you my boy and all, but you know the drill. It makes no sense to bring girls when there will be girls to holla at while we’re down there.”

“I got you. I’ll holla once I’m done with the game. I know you’ll be up, so make sure you got the line clear, all right?”

“All right, bet.” Dante moves with his phone to head out of the house. “I gotta head out, too. We heading to the Langston Hughes game; they playing Douglas County tonight. It’s gonna be fire!”

I shake my head. When we were rolling deep, Squad never did go to a game at the school we actually attended. I shouldn’t be surprised they wouldn’t be going to one of Douglass’ games…until they started winning again. “Just stay out of trouble, bro. I ain’t there to pull you out if things go left.”

“You make sure you do the same, little bro,” Dante tells me, his face growing serious. “Make sure you find backup down there, all right? We’re all a bit tight that you’re down there with no one outside of Unk to cover.”

“I’m good for now. Ain’t like I’m really trying to get into anything down here.” I roll my eyes as I think about it. “I’m not built for this small-town life. I’ll head down to Jax or something to see what’s popping down there if it gets too boring.”

“Okay… I’ll tell Squad we linked up by FaceTime. I’ll get at you later. One.”

“One.” I close the call, enjoying the breeze. I do my best to calm the rising anxiety, but I have a hard time focusing on the road. With the call from Dante and these reminders of the past, all I can think about is my mom. Today was a lot, and I’m feeling a little overwhelmed by it all. “I miss you so much. I wish you and Dad were here. I need you.”

I keep driving down the road, and I don’t know whether there’s something in the wind or if I want my wish to come true so badly that my mind’s playing tricks on me, but I feel a pair of lips kiss my cheek and something like a hand touch my shoulder.

We are always here with you, Ya-Ya. Mommy loves you so much.

We are here with you, my son…I promise.

I hit the brakes so hard the tires squeal against the street. My heart races as I swerve to find parking. The minute I cut the engine, I reach for the spot where I felt the kiss, blinking hard and fast as I’m struggling to make sense of what happened.

“Okay, that was… Did that really…” I shut my eyes tight to bring that feeling, that familiar presence back. But I can’t feel it anymore. I bang my hands against the steering wheel, then take a deep breath and wipe away a stray tear, start the engine, and finish my drive to the stadium. I’m already late to the game, and I don’t want to disappoint Zahra.

And I’m not sure why, but I just know that I won’t be right until I see her face.