Did you just read the title of this chapter and think, Wait a minute. Don’t try too hard? Hasn’t this whole book been about trying harder to serve your customers? Well, it has, and you should. But the key word here is “too.” Trying hard is important, but trying too hard can be as bad as not trying enough. It’s kind of like parenting, where doing too much for your kids is sometimes worse than doing too little.
Think about how you feel when an overbearing salesperson in a store hovers over you and asks repeatedly if you need assistance, when all you want is to be left alone to look around. Or think how annoying it is when a server at a restaurant stops by your table every five minutes to ask if everything’s okay with your meal. That behavior is so pervasive that I recently saw a cartoon that pictured a couple at home, with the wife holding the phone and telling her husband, “It’s the waiter at the restaurant where we ate tonight. He wants to know if everything is still all right.” Here’s a tip: If your customers have to stifle the urge to scream, “Go away!” or, “Leave us alone!” you’re trying too hard.
Unfortunately, the brave new world of social media has given companies additional ways to turn off customers by trying way too hard. I don’t know about you, but I find it irritating when I get e-mails from companies I do business with asking me to “like” them on Facebook. Nor do I like it when companies flood my in-box with six messages a day alerting me to company news, new product arrivals, or even special offers. The occasional e-mail letting customers know about a major change in corporate policy, the opening of a new store location, or a blowout sale is fine, but any company that feels the need to contact you daily is simply trying too hard.
Nine times out of ten, trying too hard will backfire. Being overly solicitous and eager to please is not only annoying, it makes you seem phony. Customers will feel that they’re being manipulated, and their guard will go up. Your intentions might be pure, but the fact is, no one likes a phony, and most people can spot one in the first few sentences you speak—sometimes even before you open your mouth. No one likes to be pestered constantly, either, and you’ll lose customers quickly if you hover over them when they are clearly trying to shop in peace or enjoy a quiet dinner with a companion.
Mind you, it is not always easy for employees to know when someone wants less attention rather than more, because most customers are nice; they grin and bear it when service gets too intrusive. My rule of thumb when I worked in the restaurant business was: Don’t interrupt customers who are in the middle of an intimate or intense conversation, and don’t ask if they’re enjoying their food before they have taken at least two or three bites. In a retail store, you might want to let the customers themselves decide how much attention they want by simply having a salesperson say, “Just let me know if I can assist you,” when they enter the store.
This doesn’t mean you don’t have to pay attention. While customers seldom complain if you try too hard, they do complain if you ignore them. So train your employees to keep a keen eye on customers so they can act promptly when they want help. It’s not hard to spot the signs: they stop eating and talking to their companions and lift their gaze; they step back from the merchandise and look around. I call it “the long neck, help me” look. When customers want your attention, their necks extend and rotate like a periscope. The rule is: Heads down means they don’t need you; heads up means just that—they are giving you a heads-up to come and serve them.
Bottom line is, if your service is truly superior, you won’t have to try so hard. Take it from me: If you follow the thirty-nine Customer Rules in this book and do your part to make sure everyone in your organization follows them, giving your customers authentically great service will be as easy and effortless as giving your children love.