SIXTEEN

 

I limped out of the medical tent, cursing under my breath.

There wasn’t much Avian could do for my leg.  I had tried to tell Bill and West that.  He had simply wrapped the wound and sent me out, turning his attention back to Graye.  He was still unconscious and Avian was having to pound on his chest every so often to keep his heart beating normally.

“Eve,” West called as I headed in the direction of my tent.  “Are you alright?”

“Leave me alone, West,” I said as I shook my head.  I refused to look at him, keeping on my path.

“What?” he asked, his voice sounding taken aback.  “What did I do?”

I just shook my head, my jaw clenching together.  Something boiled under my skin.  He’d better do as I said or he was going to be the victim of an explosion.

“Eve,” he said as he followed me, his voice becoming more insistent.  “Eve!  Look at me!”

“Seriously, West, leave me alone.”

His hand grabbed my wrist, pulling me to a stop.  I whipped around to face him, my hand rising.  I barely registered the shock in West’s face before I stopped myself.  I’d been about to connect my fist with his jaw.

“What’s going on, Eve?” he asked, his brow furrowing, his eyes searching mine.  “What did I do?”

I finally erupted.

“I can’t be around you like this!” I shouted, not even looking around to make sure no one else was listening.  “Yes, you make me feel things, but you also distract me so much I can’t even do my job!  It was my fault Graye got hurt.  He was looking for me and where was I?  Up a tree with you!  He could have been killed!  If I had been five seconds later getting to him, he would have been infected!

“I can’t do this, West.  I can’t keep getting distracted.  I can’t feel things that the rest of you feel.  People will get killed if I do.”

He stared at me, hurt and anger creeping into his eyes.  When he didn’t say anything, I looked away.  A few people had stopped what they were doing to watch us.  “What are you all looking at?” I snapped.  Before anyone could say anything, I took off in the direction of my tent.

 

I shut it all off and kept away from everyone.

After talking to Gabriel, I got myself on scouting duty every day, trading out my gardening hours.  He didn’t fight me like I had expected, but then again, he had heard my outburst and he knew what I had said was true.  I couldn’t afford to be distracted. 

I also took over all of Graye’s night watch duties.  Without Gabriel’s knowledge, I took over everyone else’s as well. 

Between scouting duty in the morning and watch at night, I simply slept the rest of the time.  I blocked out the noise and light around me and shut myself down.  It wasn’t hard, with everything I was doing I was actually feeling exhausted.  I was finally finding my limits.

Gabriel had thought about moving Eden again after what had happened with Graye but Avian and I had talked him out of it.  It was obvious the Bane were getting more persistent.  There wasn’t far for us to go without getting too far away from water and the gardens.  We were just going to have to fight them off if they continued to come.  Even if they were going to start coming with weapons.  Plus, we were never going to find a better location than the one we were already at.

Everyone short of two people on scouting duty was gathered together for a light dinner.  We had been trying to be careful lately with our provisions.  We were in the lull of time between the leftovers of last year’s harvest and this year’s pickings. 

Some of us peeled off, settling into our nightly activities.  I found myself with my eyes glued to the fire, watching as the flames danced in the night air.  Gabriel, Bill, Graye, Avian, and a mix of others stayed as well.  We were all quiet, lost in thoughts of mixed memories and fears, the flow of our lives.  The same thing ran through our minds though.  Life, our world, what was going to happen to it.

“I can’t believe how fast it happened,” Gabriel said suddenly as he stared into the flames, seated only a few feet away from me.  “Civilization took thousands of years to build up to where we were.  And it was destroyed in just four months.”

None of us said anything for a while, each reminiscing on how we had gotten here.

“My aunt was one of the first to get the technology,” Bill surprised me when he spoke up.  Bill usually wasn’t one for many words.  “She’d been waiting for four years for a new heart.  All the money in the world at her disposal and it couldn’t buy her a new organ.  Until NovaTor’s infection was created.  The week after TorBane was approved, her husband had her transported to the facility and she was fine the next month.  Cured.  Until she choked the life out of Uncle Rich twelve weeks after the operation.”

A log popped in the fire, sending a billow of red-hot ash into the darkening sky.

“Fifteen hundred had the implants.  Fifteen hundred was all it took to wipe out six billion and a half,” Avian said.  I glanced up at him, watching as the flames danced in his eyes.  They were always so serious.  I wondered how they would look if none of this had ever happened.

“Everything collapsed so quickly,” Gabriel said quietly.  “The Army, the Navy, the Marines couldn’t fight it off.  All the weapons and technology we did have and they couldn’t destroy this.”

I glanced around at all of them.  Gabriel looked so sad and I felt a twinge of pain for him.  He’d been in the normal world the longest.  How things used to be had been so engrained in him.  The world was nothing like how it used to be. 

My eyes moved to Bill.  He was another one of those people who you just looked at and knew there was a story to them.  But I didn’t know much of anything about Bill’s past.  He had very little family as far as I knew.  He’d never been married, never had any children even though he had to be in his early forties.  I didn’t think he had even had any parents left before the world evolved.  I sensed that in a way, he almost liked this way of living.  Because even though everything was so complicated, life was simpler now.  You didn’t have to worry about having a nice car, a job, or whatever else people used to worry about.  You just had to survive.  Bill was good at that.

Graye sat silent, staring into the fire, just like the rest of us.  He was a person I could never fully figure out.  There was a history to him that he never talked about, that he kept locked up and buried in a deep place.  I knew he had been married before, had a daughter.  How had he escaped the infection when they didn’t?  Had he had to leave them and get to a safe place?  Somehow I didn’t think he could just up and walk away from them.  Out of everyone in our circle, he was the angriest at our destroyed world.

“Did you ever run into any marauders?” Gabriel asked Bill, nothing more than a small glance in his direction.

“Just once,” he answered as he cleared his throat.  “I walked a long ways.  There were two of them in a truck, scavenging for food.  They had guns but they were desperate.”

“What happened?” I asked through the dark.

“I walked away with what I walked into there with.”  He left it at that.  Bill would fight until he had no fight left in him. 

“They killed each other off pretty quick,” Gabriel said, not directing his recollections at anyone.  “They fought over food, open territory.  Eventually there was no one left who would fight with them over it.”

The stars winked into view overhead, burning with intensity.  I was going to have to head up to my post soon.

“How did any of us survive it?” Avian said as he rubbed two fingers over his lips.

No one answered for a while.  The sky was now almost pitch dark as I stood, pulling my pack tight around my shoulders.  “You were smart.  That’s how.”

I walked away from them, feeling one pair of eyes watching me as I left.

 

The trees chirped with life as the sun started spreading its rays.  I stretched my legs, shaking my body awake.  It was harder than I expected to switch my internal clock to a nocturnal sleeping pattern.

I heard boots on the ladder and poked my head over the ledge of the watchtower.  Sarah looked up at me with dark circled eyes.  I gave her a hand and pulled her up over the edge.  She half tripped as she got to the top.  I caught her and helped ease her down to the rough bench.

“You alright?” I asked.

“Yes,” she said with a small chuckle.  “I just didn’t sleep well last night.”  She took a deep breath, closing her eyes for a moment.

I looked at her closely, taking in every detail of her.  Her eyes were dark.  I guessed she hadn’t been sleeping well for a while now.  She looked like she had lost a little weight as well.

“Are you feeling okay?  You don’t look so good.”

She gave a laugh, her eyes opening again.  They looked tired.  “You could try being a little more tactful.”

“Blame it on the robot in me,” I said with a little bite in my voice.  She just smiled up at me and patted the space next to her.  I sat and watched as the sun continued to creep up into the sky.

“So are you?” I asked.  “Feeling okay?”

“I’m fine,” she said quietly.  It didn’t fully feel like the truth.  “I just had a seizure this morning.  Woke me up.”

I didn’t feel scared often, but this shook me.  There was nothing I could do about the seizures, there was no battle I could fight.  I could never be strong enough to fix her.  “How many a day?”

“It depends.  Some days it’s only one.  Others it’s five or six.”

I just shook my head as I looked down into my lap. 

“I’m fine.”  It felt like she was saying it more to herself than to me.  “So how are things going with West?  Better than with Avian?”

I shook my head, my eyes falling to the boards at my feet.  “Feelings are too complicated.  How is anyone supposed to deal with it?  They just make you crazy.”

“Crazy sounds like a good description,” she laughed.  But it sent her into a coughing fit.

“How ironic is it, that whatever is killing me would have been fixed by what TorBane was supposed to be?”  Her voice was shaky as she spoke.

“That’s pretty messed up,” I said, my eyes scanning the trees before us.

“It could probably still fix me,” she said, her voice growing quiet.  “The tech.  It could probably still heal whatever is broken inside of me.”

“Don’t say that,” I said, my voice sharp as I met her eyes.  “Those people who all got infected, they aren’t people anymore.  They’re dead.  Don’t wish to be one of them.”

“I didn’t say that, Eve,” she said, taking my hand in hers.  She felt so fragile.  “I’m sorry I upset you.”

“Sarah?”  I heard the call from the ground beneath us.  Avian.

She sighed.  “He will hardly let me out of his sight these days.”

I didn’t blame him.  He was scared.

“Coming!” she yelled and headed down the ladder.  “Hang in there, Eve.  You’ll figure out what your heart wants eventually.” 

I looked over the edge as she went down.  Avian’s eyes met mine and he gave me a sad half smile.  I wasn’t sure if I managed to return it.

I waited a few minutes before I climbed down, Tuck, the day watchman, coming to replace me.  As I walked toward the kitchen area, I realized I was being followed.  I turned to see the child shadowing me.

“Can I help you?” I said awkwardly.  I had never been around a child before.  How did you talk to one?

He just stared at me with his big green eyes.

“Where’s your mother?” I asked as I stopped walking and turned toward him.  He halted suddenly, nearly tripping over himself.  It only now struck me how odd it was that Victoria was actually his mother.  She was so young.

“She’s working,” he said.

I nodded, still unsure how to interact with Brady.  I remembered Victoria had been assigned as seamstress.

“Does she know you’re wandering around?” I asked.

He shook his head.

“Maybe you should go back to her.”  I was squirming by now, itching to get away from a situation I didn’t know how to handle.

“Can you teach me how to use this?”  I hadn’t realized he was holding anything until he held up the slingshot.  “He told me you could teach me.”  I looked as he pointed, my eyes catching West’s.  He gave me a coy smile.  I just shook my head at him and turned back to Brady.

“You think you’re big enough to handle that thing?”

He gave a very enthusiastic nod.

“Come on,” I said as I glanced back at West, giving him the smug look this time.  “I’ll give you a few pointers.” 

I thought the smile was going to crack Brady’s face as we moved away from the growing crowd.

We walked down to the lake’s edge and stopped at a spot with round stones large enough to use.

“Here,” I said as I picked up a medium-sized one and handed it to him.  “Show me what you’ve got.”

Brady pursed his lips together and placed the stone in the sling.  He closed one eye and pulled it back.  Just before he released it, he squeezed both eyes closed.  It flew about five feet before it splashed in the water.

“Hmm,” I said as I looked everything over.  “Try this and keep your eyes open this time.”

I adjusted his hands, showing how to properly hold the sling.  I showed him how to aim it, told him all the tricks I could think of for better accuracy.  He was making every target I gave him within an hour.

“How old are you Brady?” I asked as I watched him hit a tree fifteen feet away.

“Four and a half,” he answered as he bent and picked up another stone.

“Brady!” Victoria’s frantic voice floated over the tents at our backs.  “I’ve been looking all over for you!”

She rushed over and grabbed onto one of his arms.  “I’m sorry if he’s been bothering you, Eve.  I thought he was with Leah.  I’ve been working all morning.”

“No, he’s been fine.  I’ve just been teaching him how to use the slingshot.  He’s pretty good actually,” I said.  That brought the smile back to Brady’s face.

“Well, thank you,” she said as she looked down at him.

“Actually, do you have some time?  I could really use a few new shirts.  Mine are getting a little threadbare.”

“Yeah, sure,” she said with a grin and a nod.  “Come on.  I’ll measure you right now.”

I returned her smile and followed her.  

Why did my face feel so hollow lately?