FOURTY-TWO
Not a single trace of glass was to be found as the roof of the hospital was flooded with its occupants. The Pulse sat in the middle of the expansive space, a gleaming trophy for every single one of us. It was a testament to mankind’s will to survive. To live.
Twinkling lights were strung around the area, the only light to see by beside the huge moon that loomed in the sky. Music filtered through a box that was plugged into one of the many electrical cords that ran back into the building. I watched as people moved in time with it, saw their smiling faces as they held each other close.
The rest of the members of Eden had arrived only six days after the Pulse went off. When Hunters had been spotted every day for three days straight they decided they had no other choice but to leave early. Their truck had run better and faster than ours had and they found us quickly.
I had felt like my insides might burst from the joy I felt as we explained to them the bodies they saw lying everywhere. We were finally safe. Hopefully for a good long while. Nearly every one of them had tears in their eyes.
I hesitantly hugged Gabriel when a sob escaped his chest. “Thank you,” he had simply whispered. I pulled Bill into my arms next. To my surprise, he didn’t let go for quite a while. Even though I knew it made him uncomfortable, I pulled Graye into a hug as well and gave him a tight squeeze. It felt so good to see my brothers again.
Their joy was crushed though when we told them about West. Their tears of joy quickly turned to tears of sorrow. Victoria broke down into sobs. I didn’t think West ever realized just how loved he had been in Eden. He had been accepted as a family member, even if he didn’t realize it.
What was unexpected though, was seeing the way Wix looked at Victoria, the way he consoled her tears. I didn’t anticipate seeing her slide her hand into his. And to see Brady grab Wix’s other hand and call him “daddy.” Apparently I’d been way off the marker thinking she and Avian were falling for each other.
And so there we were, three days later, watching as Wix and Victoria stood before the one-hundred and thirty-six residents of Los Angeles. Gabriel stood with them and spoke of love lasting beyond death. And wearing the white dress she had picked from one of the long forgotten about shops, she and Wix spoke words to each other I finally understood.
Maybe I should have waited to have Dr. Beeson lessen my emotional blockers. Ever since the rest of my family was reunited, I’ve felt everything was going to overwhelm me. One little bit at a time, he said, and someday I’d be normal. As normal as I could be anyway. Now I had to decide if I really wanted to be normal. Already at times I felt everything would consume me, all the joy I felt, all the sorrow I experienced for the billions of lives that had been lost.
But mostly I felt an overwhelming sense of hope for the future.
We’d slowly been clearing bodies out of the city in the days since the Pulse went off. Even though we knew everything was dead, most of us didn’t trust having them all lying in the streets and in buildings. There was enough live tissue left in most of them for there to be a risk of disease spreading. We were never going to be able to clear all the hundreds of thousands of bodies out, but we would clear the areas we inhabited. The floor of the Pacific Ocean would be littered with bodies.
I pushed the plate of food away from me as I brought myself back to the present, feeling fuller than I could remember ever feeling. Avian walked over in his recently picked out suit, two cups filled with some kind of liquid. He offered one to me and when I shook my head, he set them down on the table. I couldn’t help but smile at him as he held a hand out to me. I took it and stood, the green silky fabric of the dress I wore sliding around my body in an alien way.
My hand in his, Avian led us to the area of the roof where people danced, moving in time to the music that wove around us. He slid his hand around my waist, pulling me close, resting his cheek against mine.
“You look amazing,” he said quietly as we moved in a slow circle.
“You clean up pretty nicely yourself,” I said with a smile.
We danced slowly, our hearts slowing to the same rhythm.
“I can’t believe you asked me if I was in love with Victoria,” Avian suddenly said with a chuckle.
“You’re bringing this up now?” I said defensively as I backed away from him just a bit.
“I just think it’s funny,” he said with a chuckle, pulling me close again. I just shook my head and rolled my eyes, even though he couldn’t see.
“She looks really beautiful tonight,” I said as I watched her and Wix dance together. Their red hair nearly glowed under the twinkling light. Brady danced by himself next to them in his own little suit.
We slowed a bit as Avian turned to look at her. The fabric draped around her thin frame in an almost dreamy way, shimmering in the lights.
“Would you wear one?” Avian asked quietly as he looked at me with his burning blue eyes. “Someday. For me?”
My eyes widened a bit as I realized what he was really asking. My insides swelled, my heart picking up in pace. A smile crossed my lips as I leaned forward, pressing my lips to his. “Only for you,” I whispered.
Avian smiled as I pulled away, giving me a small squeeze. His eyes still on mine, he took a step away, keeping my hand in his. He led me through the crowd, through the door, and back down the stairs into the hospital.
As we walked past the door to the Extraction room, I gave a hard swallow. It was hard to fully enjoy the wedding party when I knew West was sitting unconscious in that room.
We continued to watch West on a daily basis. His vitals remained stable, his wounds completely healed from that awful day. Every night someone would go in to sweep up the cybernetic scraps that worked their way out of his skin. They were melted down and transported away.
I asked the doctors every few days what they thought would happen to West but they only said that they still don’t know if he would recover or not. We could only hope.
Things had escalated between Avian and I the last few days. Even though West still didn’t know what had happened, things feel whole. Maybe it was the nights we’d spent together, sleeping in each other’s arms. Maybe it was the hunts we’d gone on. It didn’t matter. It only mattered how right it was, how perfect.
There were a lot of things that I didn’t know about the future. I didn’t know if West would ever wake up. I didn’t know how I would deal with it if he never did. I didn’t know if the Bane would ever travel here from another city, if we would ever have to fight them off again. I didn’t know how everyone in Eden would adjust to our new way of life.
I didn’t know if we would ever reclaim our planet or even just our country, whatever that meant anymore.
But there were a few things that I did know.
I knew that I would continue to take care of Eden. I knew I would help till our new gardens come spring. I would continue to do everything in my power to keep my family alive.
I knew that I could count on Avian to be by my side until the day my heart stopped beating.
And I finally knew what love was.
I woke the next morning just an hour from dawn. I felt the cold sheets next to me, realizing that Avian was gone. At the same time, the door to my room opened, letting in a little sliver of light.
“Where were you?” I asked as I pushed my hair out of my face.
“Come on,” he said through the dim light. Even with how dark it was I could see the smile on his face. “I’ve got a surprise for you.”
I pulled on my boots and followed Avian silently through the sleeping hospital. We came out on the ground level and exited through the front doors. Sitting on the sidewalk was a beautiful two-wheeled red mass of machinery.
“What is it?” I asked, running my hand along its glossy surface.
“It’s called a motorcycle,” Avian said with a smile as he walked over to it.
“Does it still work?”
“Royce had it saved in the basement of the hospital. Do you want to go for a ride?”
I couldn’t suppress the smile that spread on my face as I nodded.
Avian straddled the motorcycle and a moment later had the engine roaring to life. I sat on the seat behind him, wrapping my arms around his chest. “Hang on,” he said over his shoulder.
The beast ripped to life, the pavement falling behind us as the hospital faded away. The night air caressed my cheeks as we sped by, my hair fanning out behind me. This was a freedom I had never experienced, one I vowed to live over and over again.
We drove for nearly an hour and I realized where we were going when I smelled the salt in the air. Avian parked the motorcycle in the middle of the road and looked out to the west.
I didn’t wait for him to follow me as I slid off the back of the motorcycle. My eyes fixed in front of me as I crossed the pavement and then my boots sank into the sand. I walked to the edge of the water, staring into the horizon.
There was nothing but water and sky for as far as I could see.
I understood then what West had said about the ocean being scary and beautiful at the same time. I felt so small, so helpless. It could claim my life in just a moment if it were to awaken with fury. But it was beautiful. The slowly fading moon gleamed on its surface, an endless dance of celestial skill. Mankind could never hope to have that kind of grace.
And then I noticed something at the edge of the sand. My old tent had been pitched, waiting there like an old friend.
“Welcome home,” Avian said softly.
As I looked back out over the water, his thumb brushed across my cheek. I realized there were tears streaming down my face.
Maybe I was more human than I thought.