“You’ve been oddly quiet, Violet,” Jenny had told me during the breakfast clean-up the morning after the incident with Miles happened. “Is it because of what the Queen tried to do?”
I rolled my lips together and picked up another plate to scrub. “No, I’m just… tired, is all.”
I could practically feel Jenny’s teasing smile. “I noticed you get up earlier now. Gone before sunrise. Could this newfound tiredness be the result of a certain,” she leaned in, whispering, “prince.”
I pushed her away from me and laughed dryly. “Absolutely not.”
It was a complete lie. And soon, the fighting lessons with Miles will be up and I’ll go about my normal routine. No more early mornings. No more odd twisting stomach aches.
No more Miles.
I ignored the sharp pain that was sent to my gut at the thought of this.
Before Jenny could push the conversation any further, Irelda burst through the kitchen doors with a wide smile on her face. “Hello, hello, ladies! Today’s going to be an important day, so set down what you are doing and listen up.”
The room filled with clanking and banging noises as we all halted our cleaning.
“Good.” She began, flipping and skimming threw her clipboard. “Today we are going to be doing something I believe you girls will be excited about. Because of the odd change in weather we’re having, it’s quite warm out today. The Queen has requested we host a small, intimate gathering in the gardens! This means you girls will get to do something extremely rare… go outside!”
The room lit up with excited chatter as I scoffed. They made it seem as if feeling the sunlight against our skin was a privilege.
Jenny grabbed my arms with wide, optimistic eyes, her ginger curls bouncing against her shoulders. “She said we’re going outside!”
It was then my annoyed demeanor faded when I looked around to see everyone’s anticipation. I had been lucky to be roaming in the gardens and traveling from the castle to the training grounds and I never really realized. Some of these girls must’ve not felt daylight on their skin in years.
“How long has it been for you?” I asked Jenny in a hushed tone, not wanting to be ridiculed by Irelda like always.
She thought for a moment with a frown. “I’d say… eight months? Nine?”
I took every muscle tensed in my body to not lose my breakfast right there all over her shoes.
Despite my best efforts at avoiding Jenny as we set up the tablecloths out in the gardens, Jenny finally trapped me as we began sorting the metal utensils under a little pavilion. “You’re avoiding me,” she stated matter-of-factually.
“No.”
“What is it, then?”
I wondered if I should just come out and say it to her… tell her how guilt struck I am that I am constantly complaining about my imprisonment here when these ladies I’ve worked beside all this time have it so much worse.
“It’s a pretty hot day today. All this time in the sun… I must be heat poisoned.”
It wasn’t a complete lie. Ever since we had sat to have our afternoon meal, my stomach twisted, and my head pounded.
Jenny basked up to the sky and held her arms out, taking it all in. “It’s just lovely.”
More guilt.
More dread.
I brushed her off and slipped into a group of girls who were setting out the dining sets. One of the blonde ones, Aubrey, shot a look toward me. “What do you think you’re doing?” She asked in a snarky tone.
I frowned, looking down at the utensils I had placed on both sides of the ceramic plates. “Placing the utensils?”
She rolled her eyes and pushed me away from the table before swapping the forks and the knives. “The dinner fork and the salad fork go on the left, not the knives. And your soup spoon goes on the outermost right of your knives, not on the inside. Gosh, didn’t your parents teach you anything?” She said it as if she found great pleasure in correcting my mistake… like she was superior.
Two can play that game.
“How did you become a maid for the Queen anyway, Sabrina?” I asked slyly.
She crossed her arms in defense. “My father is a duke of this Kingdom. Owns most of the farmland around here. What about you? I bet you were picked from the slums of the Kingdom.”
“Actually,” I started confidently, “I volunteered to participate in a set of games where you tear apart your opponent’s limb by limb until there’s only one remaining survivor.” I paused, then added for good effect, “If your tiny brain can’t follow, the winner was me.”
The whole group of girls’ snarky smiles fell from their lips. They all looked to Sabrina for her reaction. She pressed her lips together in annoyance. “Whatever. It just means you came from the villages, which is like, the lowest you can be.”
The girls all dispersed before anything more could be said. I forced back a sly smile as I watched all of the remorseful looks they shot at Sabrina.
I spent the rest of the evening avoiding Jenny at all costs, even if that meant slipping into conversations that bored me from the moment I entered them.
I tried to ignore the tingling feeling of guilt spreading up my arms when I dared to shoot a glance in her direction and saw the longing laced across her face.
I couldn’t bear to face her.
Lately, it felt like I was holding a lot back from her. But I had to. If the Queen caught wind of what Miles and I had been doing, she’d throw me back into the fire and make sure I stayed there for good this time…
And death was not a luxury I was willing to afford.
I clutched the little collection of papers against my chest, and I scanned my head left and right down each hallway I passed. The shoes they made us wear with our uniforms clicked against the marble floors and echoed down the halls, making me cringe at the thought of being caught. My eyes searched left and right for the man I so desperately needed to find.
It had been hours since the evening picnic commenced. After cleaning up, all the girls dragged their tired bodies upstairs to the maid’s quarters where they’d stay for the rest of the night.
Not me, though.
I had to do this. To pass these letters on to my friends and family. I needed them to know I was okay… that I was alive.
If I were caught with these letters in my hand, there was no telling the consequences. The mere thought of the possibilities made the small scar above my eyebrow from the fire sting as a reminder…. a warning.
I continued further anyway.
Just as I rounded the corner, in a mere flash, a large arm reached out from beside me and yanked me into a doorway. Before I could scream out a hand clasped tightly around my mouth and the door was kicked shut.
It was completely dark now as I clawed and writhed at the large figure behind me. I kicked at his legs, but like huge oak tree trunks, nothing I could’ve done would hurt him.
The papers had flown from my hands and scattered across the floor, but all I could do was fight.
With one hand clamped against my mouth and the other holding me back against him, I did the only thing I could think.
My teeth sunk into his palm as hard as I could.
He yelped out in pain and instantly released me, pushing me away from him.
I stumbled around to face him and flicked on the small light that was next to the door.
My eyebrows furrowed in confusion as a blonde guard stood healed over, panting heavily, and cradling his wounded hand with fresh bite marks deep enough to draw blood. I had never seen this man up close before, only in passing. He wore a guard uniform with a sword fastened at his waist, just like every other one.
If he really wanted to hurt me, why wouldn’t he have just used his sword?
While he was distracted with his hand, I lunged forward, pulled his sword free, and held it out towards him. He jumped and little and then slumped against the wall, his face full of pain titled towards the ceiling.
“God, girl. You bite hard.”
“Who the hell are you?”
He licked his lips and wiped a bead of sweat from his brow. “I’m Arlo. One of the guards here.”
“Why did you attack me?”
He cocked an eyebrow. “Attack you? Please. I barely touched you. I guess those lessons with Miles haven’t paid off at all. I mean, I had you pinned for like sixty seconds and you still couldn’t do anything to fight besides biting the shit out of me.” He examined his hand again and shook the pain from it. “Which is like, a totally illegal move by the way.”
I blinked at him. “How do you know about Miles?”
He blew out a long breath and groaned. “Oh my god, you’re slow. Miles is my best friend. He sent me here to test you on the skills you’ve learned so far, and, as I said before, you completely failed.”
I frowned. “So, this was all a… test?”
He looked me up and down. “Do you have brain damage? Did your mother drop you on your head when you were little? Yes, it was a test.”
My breath hitched at the comment, and I tossed his sword back before leaning over and retrieving the papers. I think it was safe to say he wasn’t someone I had to worry about seeing them.
“Don’t talk about my mother,” I told him quickly.
He raised his eyebrows at the change in tone.
I headed towards the door to continue searching for Miles, but Arlo’s voice sounded again behind me. “I know where he is.”
I turned on my heel and crossed my arms. “Yeah, well, I do too.” I lied. “So, if you could leave me alone now, that would be amazing.”
I hear him call out behind me in a smug tone. “Believe what you want, but you’ll never find him without me.”
I sighed and scolded myself for giving in so quickly, but turned to him again and rolled my eyes as he jogged to catch up with me.
“How do you know Miles anyway? I thought he was, like, not even supposed to exist.” I asked him as he led the way through the castle.
“I’ve been Miles’ only friend from birth. My father used to be a guard here before me. He’d take me with him every day he had to work. With my mother being the sloppy drunk she was, his only option was to find childcare here. Fortunately, the Queen wasn’t as bad at the time, so she wasn’t opposed to arranging it. Miles and I shared the same caretaker, an elderly woman who volunteered at the castle. She, like my father and I, had to swear to never speak of her son. It was difficult at first. I remember being so young and not even being able to tell my mother about the stories we shared. But, it wasn’t like she’d listen to them anyway.” His voice ran dry for a moment, but he swallowed hard and continued. “I was fifteen when my father died protecting the Queen. I guess it was just in my blood to become a guard too. I was stuck here, anyway, so there wasn’t much else for me to do. And if I am being honest, despite knowing the Queen would never admit this, she grew to enjoy my company. Maybe it’s all a sham, though… a way to keep me close because I know her big secret of a son.”
I listened quietly as he told me this, and my soured image of him slowly began to fade with a new warm one taking its place.
“The Queen,” I begin when he had finished. “do you like her?”
His head cocked back, and he dramatically placed a hand over his heart. “Violet! The Queen is a married woman!”
I laughed along with him and shoved him playfully. “You know that’s not what I meant.”
He bit back a sheepish smile. “Yeah, yeah.” His smile soon faded though as he considered this question. “The Queen is not a good person. She’s done many horrible things. This I know. But part of me… maybe that part that’s a seven-year-old little boy who had finally gotten attention from a mother figure after a lifetime without… that part of me can’t seem to hate her.”
As much as I disagreed, I couldn’t help but feel for him. His feelings almost similarly mirrored mine as I thought about the tsunamis of attention my mother had given Rose, and the mere drops that she left for me.
Arlo punched in a sequence of numbers and a door pushed open automatically. “Miles stays here when large events are happening.”
The room had to be as large as the ballroom. It had a full kitchen and several raised platforms that lead to a large bed, bookshelves, what seemed to be a bathroom, and a large area of exercise equipment.
My eyes widened as they connected with Miles’ as he pushed himself up from a weight bench and wiped his hands with a cloth. I searched for every ounce of strength within me to not look lower than his face, where his bare chest glistened against the harsh overhead lights.
Arlo must’ve noticed this because he smirked and nudged me with his shoulder.
“You’re drooling,” he muttered quietly enough for just us to hear.
I gasped and wiped at my face and then glared at him when nothing was there. “Shut up.”
“Violet,” Miles said blankly, pushing himself up from the bench before swiping his t-shirt and throwing it on.
I scoffed at how nonchalant he was. “Don’t act as if you didn’t just hire someone to fake kidnap me.”
He still didn’t seem affected by this as he jogged down the platform and sunk into the long leather couch in front of us, his hands spreading across the back of it. “I don’t think ‘hire’ is the correct term here. He was quite willing to do it. Besides, you agreed to me teaching you. So, this is me… teaching you.”
I crossed my arms and ignored my cheeks heating up as he slid further down the couch, his legs widening.
I huffed.“So, what exactly was I supposed to learn from this?”
“This one was more for me, I must admit. I’ve learned that you are weak. Messy under pressure. Your reflexes are inadequate. It seems as if I have failed you so far.”
I don’t know why his words pierced me as hard as they did. “I wasn’t expecting it. I’m in my work outfit. It’s been a long day-”
He raised a hand to cut me off. “And that is the exact time they will get you. They’ll catch you off guard. Attack when you least expect.” His eyes wandered down the stack of papers that were now clenched tightly in my hand and were beginning to dampen from my clammy palms. “What are those?”
My eyes flash to Arlo for a moment before handing them to Miles. “They’re letters. To my family and friends back home. I want them to know I’m okay.”
He mindlessly scans them and shuffles them around. “And what does this have to do with me?”
“Well…” I chewed at my lip, a little embarrassed. “I was kind of hoping that you could get them to them because I know the Queen would never allow it and I just thought you’d have connections outside.” I squeezed my eyes shut and sighed. “And now that I’m saying it out loud it’s completely stupid and I shouldn’t have asked.”
I reached out to retrieve them from him but he quickly swatted my hand away and pulled them to him. “Stop.”
I swallowed hard.
His eyes flickered from mine to Arlo’s, who seemed to be all too amused by how flustered I was. “Can you get these to them?”
Arlo nodded and took them before folding them and tucking them in his pocket. “For you, Miles? Yes, I can try.” He then turned to me. “Don’t get your hopes up, though. I still don’t know you well enough to take a beating for you if I’m caught with these.”
“Thank you,” I reach out and squeeze his hand. “The full names and addresses are printed on the top of them.”
“I’ll go tomorrow morning. Have a quick job at Athea anyway.” He pushed the sleeve of his uniform up to peer at the silver watch around his wrist.
So that was what was digging into my neck. I bet I’ll have a bruise tomorrow.
“Speaking of, it’s getting late. I better head to the barracks before someone notices I’m missing. I’ll see you around, Miles.” They exchanged a strange upward nod to each other before his eyes met mine. He wiggled his eyes and winked at me. “Be safe… getting to… bed, Violet.”
My heart seized to beat as I realized what he was implying. I shot him a wide-eyed look, which he returned with a small chuckle before disappearing through the door.
My attention hesitantly turned back to Miles, whose expression was still calm and stoic. He blinked at me a couple of times, almost as if he was curious about what I would say or do next.
I twisted my hands uncomfortably and nodded. “Okay, well, I just came to give you those letters so… I’ll be getting into your bed now-Oh! I mean getting in bed-my bed…” I laughed dryly. “Not getting into your bed, I mean getting into my bed. To sleep… In my bed, that’s… not in this room… with you. I mean not with you!”
He cracked a smile at this and ended what seemed to be an eternity of humility with two single words: “Goodnight, Violet.”
I didn’t spend another millisecond more in that room before sprinting and stumbling out the door. I fell against the wall and clasped at my racing heart and rapidly rising and falling chest.
“Well, that was… terrible.” I jumped at the sound of Arlo’s voice. He had stayed to eavesdrop, that ass.
I shook my head and closed my eyes, desperately trying to erase what had just happened from my memory. “I hate you.”
He clicked his tongue and finally began leaving. “Yeah, but I grow on people. Just wait… you’ll see.”