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HER DRIVE BACK TO ANN Arbor was overall uneventful. When she was about halfway there she put on her headset and dialed her cousin, who picked up right away.
“Hey lady! It’s good to finally hear from you. I’ve been busting at the seams to talk! Didn’t want to email or call while you were working. Did you get what you needed done?”
Janae frowned, Shella rarely babbled.
“I did actually! The book is done. That extra week was for fine tuning some things...plus I got sidetracked.”
Did she want to tell her about Damond? Of course she did, but not while parting from him was still fresh. Shella took the choice from her anyway.
“I get it, I know how you get when you’re focused on something important. But I really need to talk. I have something important of my own to tell you! Are you sitting down?”
“Technically, yes. I’m in the car.” Janae laughed, finally recognizing the outright nerves in her cousin’s voice. “What is it? Don’t tell me you decided not to come back. That you’ll be living in Spain or someplace.”
At the silence that joke produced, Janae squinted out her windshield in disbelief. “Hello...Shella? Tell me you didn’t do that.”
“Noooo,” she said slowly. “I mean I thought about it a time or two. You know what...I think I should tell you later.”
“I don’t think so. You’ve been pestering me to call. I’m sorry I put you off, but now I want to hear it.”
“I just think you should be at home. I’d never forgive myself if my news made you run off the road.”
“Wait a minute! What kind of news would make me do that? Spill it.”
“I don’t think I will.” Her cousins’ voice took on a playful note. “Look drive safe and let me know when you get home with a text. Then maybe we can do lunch tomorrow after you’ve had time to rest. How does that sound?”
“It sounds like you’re stalling and now I really want to know what you’re hiding...from you.”
“I’m not hiding anything, which is why we’ll have lunch or even dinner if you prefer, tomorrow. Bye cus, and watch the road. Oh, and call your mama when you get in. Both your parents are driving me crazy. They think you’ve been kidnapped by some forest man and became his sex slave.”
“Stop it!”
Janae spat out laughing. She knew her parents hadn’t said anything like that, and that Shella was trying to deflect, which worked. The really funny thing was she was semi close to the truth.
“I finally got in contact with them a few days ago, but I’ll call as soon as I get in the door. I told them not to worry.”
“Do parents ever stop worrying? Anyway, I’ll see you tomorrow. Don’t forget to let me know when you get home safe.”
“Okay, okay. Talk to you later.”
Janae hung up, entertained for the next hour by trying to guess her cousin’s secret before it started to snow. Luckily, she had only an hour to go and was much closer to civilization. If it got really bad she could actually pull off an exit if need be. Turned out she didn’t, and Janae made it to her house ten minutes before five-thirty.
Lugging her suitcases inside her apartment, she left them in the doorway untouched. Janae was the type to unpack right away, but she just didn’t have the energy, nor did she frankly care at the moment. Instead she texted her cousin, then called her mom and dad. Talking to them both briefly before making an excuse to get off the phone.
Taking off her clothes she promptly put on some fuzzy pj’s, before fixing herself a simple turkey sandwich for dinner. Which made her think of Damond, soon it would be dinner time for him too. He would be eating alone as well. Funny how she’d never been bothered by that before, the eating alone thing. It was her norm more often than not, but doing it now felt a bit bleak.
Deciding to zone out with some mindless TV she turned on Netflix, finding a comedy to make her laugh, and keep her mind off a certain man. But thirty minutes into the movie she debated with herself about texting him or not. Janae had transferred his information to her phone before leaving up north. Afraid she would lose it, and have no way to keep in touch. After another few minutes she decided a brief text wouldn’t be a big deal and pulled out her phone.
Janae: Just wanted to let you know I made it home about an hour and a half ago
She tried not to track the clock as she waited on him to reply, if he even would. After all, he might actually be working and she told herself it didn’t matter either way. But when her phone pinged five minutes later she fumbled to pick it up.
D. Hall: That’s good...snow give you any trouble?
Janae: A little but I was almost home by that time
D. Hall: Good
Well crap, should she keep it going? Maybe it was best to keep it short for now.
Janae: Have a good night
D. Hall: You do the same
She twisted her lips, oddly dissatisfied with their conversation. It seemed dry to her, formal and obligatory. He hadn’t made a joke, she hadn’t tried to remind him of some minimal task he should do. They’d both been flat. Janae tried to remind herself they were both dealing with this new reality. She had to face the facts, they were not in the cabin anymore and things would be different. They would just have to wait and see if it was a different that somehow still worked for them.
* * *
SHELLA HAD ENDED UP bringing brunch to Janae’s house the day after she got back. Making her wait until they finished eating before telling her the news, and Janae had been glad to be sitting down. Her mind blown to the point where she needed a drink. They’d ended up talking for hours, until it was time for dinner so they ordered in. Both too distracted to cook.
Eventually, Janae shared her own travel secret as well. Telling Shella all about Damon and the rocky road from annoyed housemates to lovers. Shella was thrilled for her, but Janae shut her down quick, there was nothing to be “happy” about just yet. Damond and she had an interesting road ahead, as they tried to figure out if it had been cabin fever or something more. However, before Shella left she made Janae promise to come to dinner at her house soon.
Now, two weeks later Janae was returning from that dinner at her cousin’s home, her heart a little heavy. She was speechless and frankly in awe. Shella’s path was unconventional for anyone, much less a forty-year-old black woman from the Midwest, but Janae was behind her all the way. Her time with Damond had taught her not everything had to be planned out, or even make sense. Some things just were.
Once home Janae decided to take a bubble bath, something old fashioned for her generation. But she took one every once in a while to truly relax, just as she was doing now. Since that first awkward text, she and Damond communicated daily, usually briefly in the late evening around eight or nine o’clock. She knew he was being thoughtful due to her earlier bedtime schedule. Janae was finally back to her normal ten p.m. lights out, since she was no longer up sexing a night owl.
After the first couple of times the tone of the texts had gotten more personable, less stiff you could say. A few jokes and smart aleck comments started flowing like normal, before they wished each other goodnight. Like how a couple times a week he teased her not to molest herself while thinking about him.
Janae had initiated their first call a few days ago, needing to hear his voice. Strangely missing that irony and cynicism of his. When he’d picked up, they talked about how his second book was coming along, and how her editing was driving her crazy. She’d made them hang up after an hour, reminding him he had work to do. Janae had a feeling they would have talked all night.
Because of that she tried to be mindful he had work. Which was why they rarely talked by phone and kept texts short. She understood he needed to concentrate, and if he was feeling anything like her, their distance was enough of a distraction. Getting out the tub, it hit her that he only had one more week to go before coming home. When that happened he would only be thirty minutes from her. There would be nothing keeping them apart...unless it was themselves.
After everything with Shella, Janae decided when he got back she wanted to really go for it. True, they would be different versions of themselves back in the real world. Yet here she was, still eager to learn this other Damond if it came to that. Crossing her fingers he would be excited to learn about his Professor in her natural habitat as well