OKAY, the most important thing you’re going to find out about me as you read this book is that I am who I am—and I own all of who I am (flaws included) completely! 
That’s just always been my way, even while growing up as the boldest one in a family that’s pretty damn bold already, believe me! 
I’ve always been the one ready, willing, and able to offer my opinions, thoughts, and emotions to anyone on any topic at any time! That ain’t changed a bit over the years!! 
Seriously, I may be young but I have experienced a lot in my life and I’ve played all types of roles both on- and offscreen. I moved from being the only black girl in my Catholic school classroom to being taught on the set of a feature film. Even now it feels as if I’ve lived two or three lives all at once. That whirlwind of opportunity given to me as a child meant growing up a lot faster than the other kids my age, which was kinda weird.
I can’t even begin to tell you how often my heart and head rebelled against moving at the same warp speed as the new and shiny world surrounding me. But that is just the surface part of my life and not really what this book is about. This book is about the similar experiences we all face as we expand and grow. My life as an actor is just a different backdrop to the same story line that runs through all our lives.
I Don’t Belong to You comes from deep within. It’s the result of many raw experiences in my life that pushed me completely out of my comfort zone and into the open. That rawness gave me the opportunity to define and redefine, shape and reshape myself time and time again.
It may sound exhausting (which it can be) but those incredible opportunities taught me that I could make regular tweaks and adjustments to who I am at the core without ever really losing myself. Time has taught me that I can continue to evolve as a person while also staying true to the foundation of who I am. What a relief it is to know that I can stay true to myself—but I never have to be “finished.” I am a work in progress and that’s all right with me. 
When I was younger, I was always so afraid of change and of losing certain aspects of myself, as if even the smallest change would make “ME” less “ME.” For example, I was really worried that if and when I lost my virginity, I wouldn’t be “Keke the good girl” anymore. Who would I be if I weren’t “Keke the good girl” or “Keke the virgin”? (Answer in my head: “Keke the freeeeeak”!! 
)
But for real though! Let’s say Jennifer with the superlong blond hair goes and cuts her hair or dyes it black—does she stop being Jennifer? Does the star athlete who stops playing sports after college suddenly cease to exist? The answer is a big NO to both of those questions.
I’m pretty sure you are dealing with your own set of unfairly placed labels—“the poor girl,” “the rich girl,” “the mixed kid,” “the jock,” “the trans kid,” “the only black kid,” or any number of other simplistic titles that have nothing to do with what’s really going on inside of you and also don’t allow you to make room to be anything else!
Well, here’s the gag—who we are and what we are belongs to us and us alone! What that means fr fr (fr = for real) is that we don’t belong to other people and we don’t belong to other people’s expectations of us. We also don’t belong to our own old ideas of who we thought we should be or what we thought we should do. You feel me?? It’s pretty cool knowing I don’t HAVE to be attached to anything that weighs me down as I continue on this journey we call life.
Here’s the other big thing—you don’t either!
We’re all made up of so many different moving parts on both the inside and the outside—and those parts will often vary from moment to moment and from day to day. The most fabulous thing about that for me is knowing that I have the freedom and the flexibility to find my OWN voice in my own way and on my own time. It’s on me and up to me to decide which traits of mine make me feel good about being me and which ones I need to let go. No one else has a vote! 
A lot of us create identities for ourselves that are based on the patterns of our parents, friends, or other people in our lives. Some of these patterns really don’t work for us or stopped working for us—yet we continue to force ourselves to fit inside them. 
I’ve learned that sometimes we have to “kill” (not literally 
) our former selves before we can get to where we are meant to be. Sounds dramatic I know, but y’all know I’m extra. #LBVS (lbvs = laughing but very serious).
The outfit you choose may work for a night or for years to come, but the most important thing to remember is that we aren’t chained to anything but the limitations of our own mind. 
Life transitions are never easy, but how you handle them is all a part of finding out exactly what you’re made of.
I’ve learned through many experiences that it’s best to follow my gut/instincts when it’s time to make decisions. So go ahead and alter anything about you or your life that you feel isn’t working—or isn’t working ANYMORE! Listen to your gut, then move on—but only when YOU feel the time is right. 
I’ve also come to understand that energy really cannot be destroyed, only shifted (#POLARITY). 
So CHANGE your story if you want and when you want. Where are the rules that say who you were yesterday has to be who you are today? Where are the rules that say who you are today has to be who you are tomorrow? Those rules don’t exist, but this one does—all of us must remain in a constant state of evolution IF our goal is to move on to the next chapter of our lives. You cannot stand still and grow, you just can’t! 
#GROWINGNOTGROWN.
Just like you, I am the author of my story, and I can change that story anytime I please. I can flip it forward or I can flip it backward if I want. I’m in control and spiritually aware enough to know that I can trust God and the Universe (or whatever you name it, to each his own) 
with what is supposed to be happening in my life, and it will be okay. Remember, the caterpillar doesn’t ask, “When am I going to become a butterfly?” It just waits patiently until it is transformed. 