“THE COLONEL ——”
WE KNEW NOW that November 4th was the date fixed for the next battle. The C.R.A. had offered the Brigade two days at the waggon lines, as a rest before zero day. The colonel didn’t want to leave our farm, but two nights at the waggon lines would mean respite from night-firing for the gunners; so he had asked the battery commanders to choose between moving out for the two days and remaining in the line. They had decided to stay.
It turned to rain on October 29th. Banks of watery, leaden-hued clouds rolled lumberingly from the south-west; beneath a slow depressing drizzle the orchard became a melancholy vista of dripping branches and sodden muddied grass. The colonel busied himself with a captured German director and angle-of-sight instrument, juggling with the working parts to fit them for use with our guns - he had the knack of handling intricate mechanical appliances. The adjutant curled himself up among leave-rosters and ammunition and horse returns; I began writing the Brigade Diary for October, and kept looking over the sandbag that replaced the broken panes in my window for first signs of finer weather.
The colonel and the adjutant played Wilde and myself at bridge that night - the first game in our mess since April. Then the colonel and I stayed up until midnight, talking and writing letters: he showed me a diminutive writing-pad that his small son had sent by that day’s post. “That’s a reminder that I owe him a letter,” he smiled. “I must write him one…. He’s just old enough now to understand that I was coming back to the war, the last time I said good-bye.” The colonel said this with tender seriousness.
A moaning wind sprang up during the night, and, sleepless, I tossed and turned upon my straw mattress until past two o’clock. One 4·2 fell near enough to rattle the remaining window-panes. The wail through the air and the soft “plop” of the gas shells seemed attuned to the dirgelike soughing of the wind.
The morning broke calm and bright. There was the stuffiness of yesterday’s day indoors to be shaken off. I meant to go out early. It was our unwritten rule to leave the colonel to himself at breakfast, and I drove pencil and ruler rapidly, collating the intelligence reports from the batteries. I looked into the mess again for my cap and cane before setting forth. The colonel was drinking tea and reading a magazine propped up against the sugar-basin. “I’m going round the batteries, sir,” I said. “Is there anything you want me to tell them - or are you coming round yourself later?”
“No; not this morning. I shall call on the infantry about eleven - to talk about this next battle.”
“Right, sir!”
He nodded, and I went out into the fresh cool air of a bracing autumn day.
I did my tour of the batteries, heard Beadle’s jest about the new groom who breathed a surprised “Me an’ all?” when told that he was expected to accompany his officer on a ride up to the battery; and, leaving A Battery’s cottage at noon, crossed the brook by the little brick bridge that turned the road towards our Headquarters farm, six hundred yards away.
“The colonel rang up a few minutes ago to say that our notice-board at the bottom of the lane had been blown down. He wanted it put right, because the General is coming to see him this afternoon, and might miss the turning…. I’ve told Sergeant Starling.
“Colonel B—— came in about eleven o’clock,” went on the adjutant. “He’s going on leave and wanted to say good-bye to the colonel.”
“Where is the colonel now,” I asked, picking up some Divisional reports that had just arrived.
“He’s with the Heavies - he’s been to the Infantry. I told him Colonel B—— had called, and he said he’d go round and see him - their mess is in the village, isn’t it?”
At twelve minutes past one the adjutant, Wilde, and myself sat down to lunch. “The colonel said he wouldn’t be late - but we needn’t wait,” said the adjutant.
“No; we don’t want to wait,” agreed Wilde, who had been munching chocolate.
At a quarter-past one; “Crump!” “Crump!” “Crump!” - the swift, crashing arrival of three high-velocity shells.
“I’ll bet that’s not far from A Battery,” called Wilde, jumping up; and then settled down again to his cold beef and pickles.
“First he’s sent over to-day,” said the adjutant. “He’s been awfully quiet these last two days.”
Manning had brought in the bread-and-butter and apple pudding that Meddings had made to celebrate his return from leave, when the door opened abruptly. Gillespie, the D.A. gas officer stood there. It was the habit to complain with mock-seriousness that Gillespie timed his visits with our meal-times. I had begun calling “Here he is again,” when something drawn, something staring in his lean Scotch face, stopped me. I thought he was ill.
The adjutant and Wilde were gazing curiously at him. My eyes left his face. I noticed that his arms were pushed out level with his chest; he grasped an envelope between the thumb and forefinger of each hand. His lower jaw had fallen; his lips moved, and no sound came from them.
The three of us at the table rose to our feet. All our faculties were lashed to attention.
Gillespie made a sort of gulp. “I’ve got terrible news,” he said at last.
I believe that one thought, and only one thought, circuited through the minds of the adjutant, Wilde, and myself: The colonel! - we knew! we knew!
“The colonel ——” went on Gillespie. His face twitched.
Wilde was first to speak. “Wounded?” he forced himself to ask, his eyes staring.
“Killed! - killed!” said Gillespie, his voice rising to a hoarse wail.
Then silence. Gillespie reached for a chair and sank into it.
I heard him, more master of himself, say labouringly, “Down at the bridge near A Battery… He and another colonel… both killed… they were standing talking… I was in A Battery mess… A direct hit, I should think.”
The adjutant spoke in crushed awestruck tones. “It must have been Colonel B——.”
I did not speak. I could not. I thought of the colonel as I had known him, better than any of the others: his gentleness, his honourableness, his desire to see good in everything, his quiet collected bravery, the clear alertness of his mind, the thoroughness with which he followed his calling of soldier; a man without a mean thought in his head; a true soldier who had received not half the honours his gifts deserved, yet grumbled not. Ah! no one passed over in the sharing out of honours and promotions could complain if he paused to think of the colonel.
I stared through the window at the bright sunlight. Dimly I became aware that Gillespie had laid the envelope upon the table, and heard him say he had found it lying in the roadway. I noticed the handwriting: the last letter the colonel had received from his wife. It must have been blown clean out of his jacket pocket; yet there it was, uninjured.
The adjutant’s voice, low, solemn, but resolved - he had his work to do: “It is absolutely certain it was the colonel? There is no shadow of doubt? I shall have to report to ‘Don Ack’!”
“No shadow of doubt,” replied Gillespie hopelessly, moving his head from side to side.
Wilde came to me and asked if I would go with him to bring in the body. I shook my head. Life out here breeds a higher understanding of the mystic division between soul and body; one learns to contemplate the disfigured dead with a calmness that is not callousness. But this was different. How real a part he had played in my life these last two years! I wanted always to be able to recall him as I had known him alive - the slow wise smile, the crisp pleasant voice! I thought of that last note to his little son; I thought of the quiet affection in his voice when he spoke of keeping in touch with those who had shared the difficulties and the hardships of the life we had undergone. I recalled how he and I had carried a stretcher and searched for a dying officer at Zillebeke - the day I was wounded, - and how, when I was in hospital, he had written saying he was glad we had done our bit that day; I thought of his happy faith in a Christmas ending of the war. The hideous cruelty of it to be cut off at the very last, when all that he had given his best in skill and energy to achieve was in sight!
* * * * *
The shuffling tramp outside of men carrying a blanket-covered stretcher. They laid it tenderly on the flagstones beneath the sun-warmed wall of the house.
Wilde, his face grave, sad, desolate, walked through the mess to his room. I heard him rinsing his hands. A chill struck at my vitals.
* * * * *
It is finished. The colonel is dead. There is nothing more to write.
THE END