At first I didn’t move, simply shocked that he was kissing me, because it was the last thing I expected of him. Then my hormones took over and I’ll admit, I kissed him back, because oh my God, he was a good kisser. His hands were still on my face and it was like I was the center of his whole universe as he seemed to worship me with his mouth, letting out a little groan as he tasted me. His lips, his tongue, his hands, the solid muscles of his waist under my hands: it all became my universe.
So yeah, I got caught up in it. But only for a second until my brain got back online and I realized what was happening. I put my hands on his chest and pushed him back, trying not to be distracted by the wall of hard muscle and the thudding heart below my fingers.
“What...?” I managed to get out, sort of tongue-tied.
He stared at me, his chest rising and falling as he breathed hard. “Sorry,” he said, not exactly looking it.
“Why?” I asked, because apparently I could only come up with one word questions.
He ran his hand over his head again and avoided my eyes as he shrugged. “It surprised me that you didn’t look me up.”
“So that made you want to kiss me?”
“No.” He shook his head as his eyes returned to mine. “I’ve wanted to kiss you since the second I met you. Knowing you didn’t get sucked into the hype and Google me made me have to kiss you.”
My throat completely dried up at that, making speech impossible. Not that I had any sort of response.
He exhaled and turned around toward the shelves, his broad back to me. “I wanted to show you the pantry,” he said over his shoulder, changing the subject.
I pretended to put that kiss on the back-burner and looked at the shelves full of cans and boxes of food. “Why?”
He turned back toward me. “Because yesterday, these shelves were almost empty. I wanted to thank you. I judged you unfairly when I met you.”
“But you still wanted to kiss me?”
He shrugged, a smirk turning up the right corner of his mouth. “I’m a guy.”
I raised an eyebrow.
He looked down, hiding his eyes from me, shy. “And you were the most beautiful girl I’d ever seen. Even though you’d called the cops on me.”
I’d never had a boy take my breath away. Until now. I was the most beautiful girl he’d ever seen. Maybe he was waiting for me to say something, but I couldn’t. Not yet.
“Anyway,” he said. “I wanted you to know I appreciate what you did here. With the food and also with the iPods. That was...it was really nice. I’m sorry I was a douche.”
“I judged you unfairly, too.”
He shook his head. “Not really. Anyway,” he said taking a deep breath. “I shouldn’t have kissed you, but no, I guess I’m not sorry about that. It won’t happen again, though.”
“Thank you,” I said, because I knew I should. I pushed away the pang of disappointment and reminded myself that I’d seen him buying condoms; this guy had a girlfriend who he’d basically just cheated on by kissing me.
“We should go back out there before someone get suspicious.” He grabbed the door handle, leaning in close enough that I could smell him. I don’t know why I was surprised at how good he smelled. I mean, he wasn’t dirty or anything, but maybe since I’d met him when he was doing hard work, I expected him to smell sweaty, earthy. Though I’d never gotten very close to him that day or even at the blood donor clinic, I wouldn’t have expected him to smell like the perfect combination of leather jacket and aftershave: manly, sexy.
He turned the handle and opened the door, but stopped when I said his name. “Will you tell me? What happened, I mean?”
“You can Google it,” he said. “It’s all out there to see. Most of it’s true. You’ll get the idea.”
I shook my head. “I want to hear it from you. The real truth; no sensationalized BS. That’s why I didn’t Google.”
He worked his jaw as he looked from my eyes to my mouth and back again before he simply said, “No. Find out somewhere else.”
And then as I stood there, mouth agape, he left.
~ ♥ ~
Before I could even orient myself to the dining room and who was where, Chelly met me just inside the door, grabbing my arm firmly and guiding me over to an empty spot at the buffet table.
She peppered me with insistent questions. “What happened? You look freaked out. What did he do to you?”
I opened my mouth, but nothing came out.
“He didn’t hurt you, did he?” she asked, her eyes narrowing as she looked over my shoulder, watching for him to come in, I presumed. Though I could have told her he wasn’t coming; somehow I knew he’d left the building.
“No.” I shook my head. “He didn’t hurt me. He’s...I don’t think he’s like that.”
Chelly lifted an eyebrow.
“Seriously. Despite everything. He did the opposite of hurt me.”
She stared at me for a long second before her eyes widened in awareness. “Hot felon...”
“Shhhhhh,” I said, looking around, but no one was paying us any attention. The dean and Marjorie were chatting like old friends in the corner, each with a plate of snacks in her hand, and Dave was goofing around with a bunch of the center’s teens over their iPods.
I nodded at Chelly. “He kissed me,” I whispered.
Her eyes widened even more. “He...kiss...what? Are you serious?”
I nodded, pushing the memory of the kiss out of my head or I was going to get so red.
She looked around. “Where is he now?”
“I don’t know. I think he’s mad because I asked him to tell me what happened.”
“And?”
“He wouldn’t tell me. I think it’s a sore spot for him.”
She gave me an eye-roll that said, obviously, but then asked, “So how did the kissing come about? And more importantly,” she said, pausing to select a Christmas tree shaped shortbread off a platter before she continued, “Was it as hot as I imagine it would be?”
“When I told him I hadn’t Googled him, he just sort of kiss-bombed me.” I shrugged. “He seemed...I don’t know...impressed that I didn’t buy into the hype.” I didn’t tell her what he’d said. For some reason, his line about having to kiss me felt magical and just for me to play over and over in my head later. Not that Chelly wouldn’t have appreciated the swoonworthyness of it, but I wanted to keep it just for me.
“And the other thing: Hot, yes?”
I blew out a breath. “Hot, yes. Way hot. Hotter than it should have been.”
“Better than Dave?” she asked.
I glanced over toward the boy in question, feeling like I was betraying him. “Different.”
“Hotter than Rob?” she asked, catching me off-guard because I’d forgotten she knew about that.
I gave her a look but she was undeterred and continued on like she’d been the one who’d gotten kissed. “Definitely hotter. That forbidden fruit thing makes it way sexier. I mean, Rob’s like a peach, but this guy...hello banana!” she said with a wink. “Though Rob is smokin’, too,” she added with a nod, like she was tallying it all up in her head.
I wasn’t about to disagree with the part about Rob. And it’s not like I wanted to compare the guys. The situation with Danny had been intense and spontaneous and wasn’t going to happen again, so there was no reason to overthink it or compare it to my make out sessions with Rob.
Though Chelly wasn’t done with it yet. “Tongue piercing?”
“Not that I noticed,” I said, smiling as her face fell slightly.
“Too bad. I’ve always wanted to make out with a guy with a tongue piercing, and with all those tattoos, I thought maybe. I was hoping I’d get to live vicariously.”
“Sorry.”
“So now what?” she asked.
“What do you mean?”
She looked around and then leaned in close. “Hot felon kissed you. Hot felon is spending the holidays on campus. Other than you and hot felon, campus will be a ghost town. I’m not great at math, Emmeline, but even I can figure that equation out.”
My stomach flipped over at her words, but I told it not to bother. That kiss was an isolated event and meant nothing. He’d promised it wouldn’t happen again and anyway, he had a girlfriend. For all I knew, she’d be staying at the cottage with him. And Fiona, whoever that was.
But still, deep down I realized that despite it having been an isolated event, I’d know he was on campus. And no matter how hard I tried, I’d never forget that kiss or what he’d said to me.