Once, years ago, I went to a coworker's office to say goodbye on my last day of work. I happened to mention the tarot, and he immediately whisked me into his room for a reading. It turned out to be a beautiful session—meaningful for both of us. In that half hour, I got to know this man better than during all the time I'd worked with him.
Once you start studying the tarot, sooner or later, someone's going to ask you for a reading. People are curious—about the process and about themselves. You may jump at the opportunity or hesitate, wondering if you can handle this new direction.
I encourage you to try reading for someone else if an opportunity presents itself and you feel ready. In our rushed society, there are so few occasions to sit with someone and share. Take this one when you can, but keep one important point in mind. You don't need to present yourself as more adept then you are, or adopt some artificial stance. Be yourself, and encourage the other person to explore this intriguing adventure with you.
Here are some thoughts I'd like to share about reading for someone else.
In tarot literature, a person asking for a reading is often called the “querent,” someone making a query. I prefer the term “seeker.” For our purposes, then, a seeker is simply someone who asks you for a reading.
You may encounter two kinds of seekers: those you know (friends, relations, or coworkers) and those you don't know. For seekers you know, you can't help being aware of your “real” relationship. Don't jeopardize that relationship in any way, but do try to set it aside for now. Stay in the present moment by focusing on the cards and the immediate experience. Treat the reading as an event out of time for both of you.
Seekers can be eager or hesitant, open or closed, quiet or talkative, laughing or somber. Don't let any of these differences concern you. They're simply expressions of personality. If someone seems nervous, be calm and reassuring.
In readings, we come face-to-face with the mysterious. People remember readings with great feeling—especially their first. They can often recall details years later. My mother visited a storefront reader in downtown San Francisco when she was just eighteen. She talked about that reading off and on her whole life. It was a whim of the moment, but it was special to her because it opened a door into the unknown.
Seekers may request readings for many reasons, but they only ask when they are ready to look below the surface of their lives—at least a little. Even the most casual seekers are drawn for this purpose, although they may not acknowledge it. Those who are totally uninterested will never cross your path. So, readings should always be done only at the seeker's request. Never force or even encourage a reading. The desire for insight needs to come from the seeker.
A tarot reading actually involves four “entities”—you, the seeker, and both your Inner Guides.
Your Inner Guide is by your side throughout the reading. It sends you intuitive messages that you pass on to the seeker, who absorbs those understandings with the help of his or her Inner Guide. Together, the four of you create an event that is meaningful on many levels.
For most seekers, a good, all-purpose main subject is “my life.” Occasionally, someone will be concerned about something in particular and ask you to focus on that topic. This is more common when you read for someone often. In this case, pick a main subject and type that you feel suits the seeker's concern. It's better for you to choose because the seeker will not be expecting this request. Asking can disrupt the flow of the process. However, do check with the seeker to make sure your choice is acceptable.
Choose a layout based on a quick assessment of the moment. Here are some points to consider:
What is the reading environment?
Keep the reading “lighter” when the environment is public or casual. Deeply personal readings are best kept for private moments.
How much time do you have?
Use small layouts if time is an issue so you can finish without feeling rushed.
What is the seeker's stated goal, if any?
Always accommodate a seeker's spoken requests for the reading, if possible.
What do I know about the seeker?
Bear in mind what you know of the seeker, but don't let preconceived ideas get in the way. Things are not always as they seem!
Do I have any pre-reading “flashes”?
Be aware of intuitive flashes before a reading. These can arrive as you're sitting down, or even days before! Accommodate these in your layout, if you can.
Assess your own energy level. Don't take on a complicated or heavy reading when you're feeling drained. Also, keep the layout simple if you plan to do many readings in a row for different people.
Be prepared with a few all-purpose layouts you know well. You can use one as is or adapt it to suit the moment. A good layout offers a variety of opportunities for open-ended insights in different areas.
If you have time, you can do a small preliminary reading about a few area-of-life subjects. If the seeker shows special interest in one of these, you can use that area of life as the main subject of a follow-up reading.
You can follow the reading procedure described in Chapter Two, but delete time-consuming steps such as taking notes and writing a summary statement. These break up the flow.
I recommend having a separate deck devoted to readings you do for others. The seeker should shuffle and cut the cards, if possible. Hand him the cards, and tell him to shuffle until he feels ready to stop. Then, direct him through the cut, and have him hand the cards back to you. Maintain the orientation he established after the cut.
You should lay out the cards. I try to sit next to the seeker so we can look at the cards together. This arrangement fosters sharing. If you must sit opposite, try to place the cards so you can both view them easily.
As you might guess, when you do a reading for someone else, all the cards in the reading are a message for that person from his or her perspective. Your role as the reader is to help the seeker make discoveries through the cards. You don't have to be a tarot expert to achieve this goal! It's the desire to be of service that counts.
The secret is to keep the focus on the seeker and away from yourself. This is easier said than done. Your pesky ego will get in the way by offering such “useful” thoughts as:
“You don't know what you're doing.”
“Who do you think you are? You're just a beginner.”
“These interpretations are really lame.”
“He's not pleased with your efforts.”
“Other readers are better than you.”
“This is really going well. I'm pretty impressive.”
“I'm special because I can do this.”
Your ego can come up with many such “helpful” comments. If one crosses your mind, simply smile to yourself, let it go, and return to the seeker. With experience, you'll forget yourself more and more, and, ironically, become more confident and relaxed.
Create an environment in which the seeker feels free to contribute. Some won't want to, but others will become engaged and vocal. Let the seeker know what you're doing as appropriate, but it's best not to get too wordy. Be truthful, but positive. Never say something is absolutely going to happen, as this can't be known. Leave the seeker with a hopeful orientation toward the future.
Turn to your Inner Guide frequently. It will help you know what to do if you trust and stay open. Have faith in its wise counsel. Know the reading will work out just as it should.
BECOMING AWARE OF YOUR EGO
As you go about your daily affairs, practice becoming aware of your ego's comments. These are thoughts you have about yourself that are critical or self-inflating. When one of these thoughts comes to mind, acknowledge it, and then gently set it aside. Don't engage the thought, just move quietly past it. If you like, you can turn your thoughts instead to your wise and loving Inner Guide. This practice will serve you well when you read for others.
IMAGINARY READING
Choose a familiar spread to work with. Now, pretend to do a reading for an imaginary seeker. Imagine the seeker sitting right next to you. This is most effective if you really get into the role. Feel and act as if the reading were actually happening. Then, when you do read for someone, the process will feel familiar. Of course, a real reading is going to be unpredictable, but you'll be ready!