The banging on my bedroom door woke me, and I sat up, ready to yell at whoever had decided it was okay to wake me up so damn early. But my eyes registered the panicked look on my brother’s face as he came barreling into the room.
He didn’t speak. He just grabbed the television remote and turned it on. “You need to see this” was the only thing that registered when images of me and Sadie flashed on the television screen. What the hell had happened? They’d found me. And my worst nightmare had come true. Sadie’s private life was being broadcast for the world to see. I hated anyone seeing her face. I hated the way they talked about her like they knew her. They didn’t know anything.
I’d done this. It was all my fault. I hadn’t protected her from this. I’d walked her right into it.
Sunday morning I slept late again. I could hear Jessica up and about in the kitchen. I stretched before standing up, reaching for my phone, and slipping it into the pocket of my pajama pants. I was supposed to be meeting Jax this afternoon to go surfing, something I had never tried. I walked down the short hallway into the kitchen and saw Jessica leaning against the bar drinking a big glass of milk.
“It’s about time Sleeping Beauty woke up.”
I stifled a yawn and shrugged. “So I slept late. I get up early every other day of the week.”
Jessica nodded. “Yes, but today is the day you get to find out what happens to girls who date rock stars.”
I frowned at her. “What’re you talking about?”
She pushed off from the bar and threw the Sunday paper on the table in front of me.
“Good thing I have thick skin, because this ain’t flattering.” She turned and walked out of the room. I stared down for the second time at a photo of Jax with a girl, but this time it was my waist his arm wrapped around. He appeared to be whispering in my ear or kissing it. I sank down into the chair when I realized I was wearing my swimsuit. The picture had been taken at the July Fourth party while we were dancing. Above our pictures the headline read THE PRINCE OF ROCK IS SNAGGED BY HIS MAID. My stomach dropped.
Jax Stone has been living semi-undercover here in Sea Breeze this summer, courting his hired maid, Miss Sadie White. The couple was seen together at a party held at the house of Mayor McCovey. Mayor McCovey’s son, Dylan McCovey, held his annual July Fourth party at his parents’ home on Seagull Drive, and Sadie White was an invited guest.
When we spoke to Dylan, he said, “No one was expecting it. Sadie is just a girl who moved here this year. We had no idea she was dating Jax Stone. But the two were inseparable.” Sadie is an employee of the Stones’, and she rides her bike to their house on Sea Breeze’s exclusive island, where only the extraordinarily wealthy have summer homes. She works in his kitchen and serves him his food. Apparently, he takes her home after work.
Sadie lives with her mother, Jessica White, in an apartment here in Sea Breeze. Her mother is a single mom who is expecting a baby any day. Sadie seems to be the only one with a job. Interestingly enough, she somehow managed to be Jax Stone’s summer girl.
I closed my eyes and laid my head on the table. I couldn’t believe the local newspaper had gotten wind of this. They’d painted Jax as a cold jerk who took advantage of his employees.
“You’d better come in here, Sadie,” Jessica called from the living room. “Things seem to be getting better and better.”
I looked up. She was staring at the television. I knew deep down I didn’t want to see what she was watching, but I stood up and forced myself to walk in there.
“Star Follower has the scoop on everyone’s favorite teen rocker. Jax Stone, who was spotted with Bailey Kirk just last week here in Beverly Hills, has been located in Alabama. That’s right, fans. He has been spending his time this summer on the coast of Alabama, and not alone, either. He has been dating his hired help. The kitchen maid.” Photos of me with Jax appeared on the screen. “Our insider source says she rides her bike to his home, where she is employed to work in the kitchen and in the garden. When Jax has any free time, he spends it charming this Alabama local. It seems the girl who lives in a small apartment and takes care of her single, yet pregnant, mom has climbed up the ladder and found herself a way out of poverty. We are left to wonder if she will manage to squeeze out a better way of life from this smitten rock star. Jax Stone really is a bighearted guy. It’s one of the reasons he is so incredibly edible!”
I felt sick. I ran from the room and went straight to the bathroom. After I emptied everything inside me, I splashed my face with water, then sank down to the floor and laid my head on the tub.
This wasn’t something I’d been expecting. I had been prepared for a lot, but this wasn’t something I ever feared. Now my life was being splattered all over the media. Either I sounded like a gold-digging tramp, or Jax sounded like he was taking advantage of a stupid, naive southern girl. There was a knock on the bathroom door. I couldn’t face Jessica right now. I just needed to be alone.
“Throwing up isn’t going to make this better. You might as well come hear the other versions on other news channels. Some of them don’t paint us like white trash.”
I groaned. “No.”
I stayed on the floor of the bathroom until I heard someone at the front door, and I knew without a doubt it was Jax.
“Sadie, honey, you got company,” Jessica called from outside the door again.
I didn’t want to leave him out there with her, so I stood up and stared at myself in the mirror. My eyes were bloodshot, and there was nothing I could do about it. I opened the door and there, instead of Jessica, stood a very upset Jax.
He grabbed me and pulled me into his arms. “I swear, I’ll kill whoever did this.”
I began to cry again. I didn’t want to do this to him, because he was obviously beating himself up about it.
He pulled back just enough so I could see his face. “Will you come with me?”
I nodded.
Jax led me with his arm firmly around my waist. “Ms. White, I’m just going to take Sadie for a little while. I’ll bring her back soon.”
Jessica snorted. “Just make sure you bring her back happier than she is right now.”
He frowned, and we walked out to his Hummer. Kane sat in the driver’s seat, and I was glad Jax didn’t have to drive, so I wouldn’t have to give up his arms. A flash went off, and Jax put himself in front of me. “Hurry, get into the car.” He slid in behind me, and we were behind the protection of dark tinted windows.
“Sadie, I’m so sorry,” he whispered again.
I sniffed and wiped my eyes. “It’s not your fault.”
He gave a hard laugh. “Yes, it is. I was careless. I wanted everyone to know you were mine, and I put you in the way of danger. The media are like hungry vultures. They pick you clean. This isn’t going to just disappear.”
I shuddered at the thought of more of my personal life being shared with the world. “How do you do this? How do you handle the invasion of privacy?” I whispered through my tear-clogged throat.
He sighed. “It’s all I’ve known for a very long time.”
“This is hard,” I admitted.
His eyes were haunted. I hated that I was the cause of all this. Being with me seemed to only bring him trouble.
“I’m tough.” I forced a smile. “I can live through this.”
Jax didn’t say anything for a few minutes. He reached over and pulled me into his arms, and we sat in silence.
“I promised you I would never let anything hurt you again.” He closed his eyes tightly and whispered, as if the images in his head were too much, “And instead I’ve not only hurt you, but I’ve hurt your mom.”
I touched his arm, hating to see him so torn up inside. “I told you I was tough. It isn’t your fault.”
He dropped his hold, pulled away from me, and leaned forward on his knees. “No, Sadie, no! This is all my fault. I am the world’s favorite teenage rock star. I live in the media. But to hear them”—he stopped and his jaw clenched—“to hear them talk about you that way . . . I need . . . I want to hurt someone.”
I scooted up on my seat to get closer to him. “Jax, please, I should’ve known something like this would happen. Yes, it hurts, but I can live through this. I can live through anything as long as I have you.”
He shook his head violently. “Don’t you see, Sadie? This is just the beginning. Your life will never be the same. I knew this when I first realized I wanted to be with you. My life isn’t made for relationships. Only girls in the spotlight can handle it, and I have never found one I wanted. Then came you. Sweet, gorgeous, selfless . . . everything I had never known. I was selfish to allow this to happen. I was selfish when I decided to charm you, and when it worked, I was selfish to want to hold on to you.”
He took my hands in his. “I love you more than anyone or anything I’ve ever known. You’ve somehow become the song inside of me. It’s because I love you so much I’m going to walk out of your life and allow you to heal and find someone worthy of you. Someone who can take you to the movies and out to get a pizza and not have to worry about being mauled by fans or getting your picture taken and splashed all over the news. I want you to have more than I can give.”
I glanced out the window and realized we were sitting outside my apartment again.
“I’m not strong enough to do this, Sadie. If you love me, you will get out of the car and walk away.”
My heart shattered, and I couldn’t take a deep breath. My eyes were blurry with unshed tears. But I didn’t move. I couldn’t.
“I don’t want to walk away from you. I love you, but how can you ask me to do this?” I whispered.
He studied me with hard eyes. “Sadie, I was leaving anyway in a few short weeks. We couldn’t have kept seeing each other after I left. This, and more, would happen if I tried to come back here during my free time.”
“But you said you loved me.”
His laugh sounded hard and mechanical. “Sometimes, Sadie, love isn’t enough. This is one of those times.”
The door on my side opened, and Kane stood with his hand held out to me.
Jax’s eyes seemed void of emotion.
“Good-bye, Sadie.”
I always knew he would have to be the one to end this. I could never walk away from him any other way. But he wanted me to now. He wanted me to leave. I was a hindrance to his life. I couldn’t fit in. I hated myself for my weakness and my emotions. But I knew they were a part of me, and I couldn’t help it. I couldn’t be what he needed. I stepped out of the car and headed toward the door, where my mother stood waiting on me. She had known somehow I would be coming back this way. The tears rolled down my face as I made my way to her, and for the first time since I was a little girl, I hurled myself into her arms and wept.