Running, I pass the legs and the torso and round the corner. The dead blue eyes greet me. I turn away, unable to look at them any longer. I'm desperate to run away from the scene, desperate to put distance between myself and the man I love lying dead on the ground, desperate to make it unreal.
But I'm met instead with bloodshot eyes.
John is standing in front of me, blocking my escape. He's laughing, reveling in his destruction. He thrusts his hands toward me, grabbing my head, squeezing tightly. Filled with rage, his insane, angry eyes dart around.
His words are dark and low and demonic as he says, "I warned you, Kylie. You didn't listen—didn't believe. And now, your precious Alex is gone forever. His blood is on your hands. Live with that." He throws his head back, a wicked laugh hissing from the depths of his black soul.
I bring my hands up to my face. They're covered in blood—Alex's blood.
"No!" I bolt upright in bed, clutching my chest, trying to prevent my heart from breaking into a million irretrievable pieces.
It's still dark, making it impossible for my mind to recognize where I am. Sweat drips off of me, and the sheets are twisted around my legs. I sit, listening to the sounds of my breathing hitching between sobs.
Alex moves behind me, engulfing me in his arms, and pulls me back against his strong chest and rapidly beating heart. "Shh, baby. It's okay. You're okay. It was just a bad dream. I'm here, and you're safe."
My head falls to my chest. I have no strength, no energy, and the thought of Alex dying terrifies me more than anything ever has. This was only a dream. What will happen when I actually have to fight John? How will I protect Alex when I'm not strong enough to get through a nightmare?
Alex deserves more. He deserves life, a long and happy life. And with each passing day, I know that life will probably not be with me. John will destroy us. But the only way he will take Alex is over my dead body. And if that's what it takes to protect Alex from John, so be it.
"Baby, tell me about it. Please, let me help."
I lean back against him and take a deep breath. I don't want to burden him with these prophecies, but I can't continue to have these nightmares every time I fall asleep. I know locking fears away doesn't make them go away. And this nightmare is intent on staying in my mind, and it will continue to haunt my sleep. I have to regain my strength, my ability to fight. I have to sleep, so the nightmares have to go away. It's the only way to save Alex.
"I was on the trail. There was so much blood. I found you, and John was there, telling me it was my fault. I looked at my hands, and they were covered in blood."
"What was your fault?" Alex asks.
"He killed you because of me. I had your blood all over me, and I was screaming, but he just stood there and laughed at me. You were gone. You were dead. And I just wanted to die with you." Tears stream down my face, and the room is silent, still.
Alex finally shifts and turns me so he can cradle me in his lap. "I wish I could make the nightmares go away. I wish I could make it all go away. But, baby, you're safe. I promise. I'll do everything in my power to protect you. No matter what, Kylie."
"I'm so sorry, Alex. I'm so sorry I got you involved in this mess. If anything happens to you because of me, I'll never forgive myself."
"Shh, baby. Nothing's going to happen to either of us," Alex whispers.
I want to believe him, but I know it’s all just wishful thinking. I’m sure death will strike my life again. But it will be John or me—or both of us. It will not be Alex. That is my silent vow to him.