October 19
The Present
7:30 P.M.
While his wife was busy entertaining the ten-figure set, Todd had somehow fallen into the managing-the-children part of the event. It was a position he wasn’t unfamiliar with. Ellie liked to remark that he wasn’t “babysitting” if he was with his own children. He had been unemployed for a while now and though he had spent the first several months furiously lunching with every colleague and connection, he hadn’t followed up with any leads or offers and they had frittered away slowly. At the time, it didn’t feel like he was the one consciously choosing not to do anything, just seemed that none of the projects or production companies willing to take him on felt “right” somehow. Did it really matter that he hadn’t worked in two years? Ellie made more than enough money.
So even if he pretended to have been roped into chauffeuring drop-offs and pickups, he actually enjoyed seeing the kids on a regular basis since he did the morning school-run every day and picked up on Fridays, while Miranda handled the rest. Todd had missed so much of Sam’s childhood that he was glad for the chance to do it over again with Giggy and the boys. There was always ice cream or Pinkberry after Friday pickup, which kind of added to the weight gain, but Todd found he couldn’t deprive them when they asked, then begged, then threw a tantrum for it. It was easier just to give in from the start.
He was in the middle of a conversation with one of Ellie’s old friends from London when he heard a loud wail coming from the side yard playground where they’d corralled the kids. Ellie had insisted on being able to have little kids running around her party—a strange tic of hers, but one that was endearing. Red wine or colored drinks were forbidden, but kids were always welcome at any of her events. Todd went to check it out immediately. He knew that wail.
When he walked into the playground, Giggy was sitting on the grass, crying her eyes out, while several girls from her school were huddled in the corner, whispering and watching. Only one of them was kneeling on the grass next to her, an arm on Giggy’s shoulder.
“What happened?” he asked, his temper flaring instantly. He hated seeing any of his kids in pain. “Why is she crying?” he demanded.
Most of the girls who were huddled together shrugged and looked away. One of them boldly looked him in the eye and said, “We have no idea; she just started crying for no reason.”
Little liar. He knew this kid. Her father was one of the top agents in the business. She was just as pugnacious as he was. Todd looked around hurriedly. Where was the playdate coordinator they’d hired to keep an eye on the kids? To make sure nothing like this happened?
A young Latina rounded the corner, carrying juice packs and string cheese. She had been Giggy’s first-grade teacher and now taught the boys. If Todd thought it was odd that Ellie hired her to babysit the kids at her party, he tried not to think about it too hard. How much did elementary schoolteachers make? Miss Kayleigh probably needed it, right? They were doing her a favor?
“Oh, Todd! I’m so sorry. I went to get the girls some snacks. What happened?” she asked.
“They won’t say,” he told her. He knelt down so he was next to Giggy. “Can you tell us what happened? Were they bullying you?”
Giggy shook her head.
“See, she’s fine,” said Miss Kayleigh. “You’re fine, right, Giggy? Sometimes the kids just get a little rough, that’s all.” That was the school policy: They stopped using the word bullying to describe aggressive behavior because there was no bullying in private schools. Especially not at the tuition they were paying.
Todd tried not to look too incredulous. “She’s obviously not fine.”
The little girl next to Giggy gave her a hug. “You’re okay, Giggy.”
“Thank you, Zoe,” he told the little girl. He knew all of Giggy’s friends and Zoe was particularly sweet.
He pulled Giggy up from the grass. “Come on,” he said, even as she kept sniffing and wiping her nose with her sleeve.
They went to Giggy’s room, which was also decorated in shades of white and gold with splashes of pink and green. She sat on one of the princess beds. There were two, and Sam had placed her suitcase on top of the other one, except Sam was nowhere to be seen. She was probably in the bathroom since the door was closed. The girls were supposed to share a room even though the other princess bed was really for Giggy’s friends when they came for sleepovers.
“Gig, you’re going to have to tell me what happened,” he said.
“Nothing happened,” she said sullenly.
“So you were just sitting there crying for no reason?”
“Correct,” she said, with just a trace of an English accent since she had spent the weekend with her father, who was in town for the party.
Todd sighed. For a while he just sat next to her, rubbing her back. He’d learned not to push. At last, when she’d stopped sniffing, he brought it up again. “Can you tell me why you’re upset?” he asked gently.
“They were teasing me,” she whispered, kicking her feet against the duvet cover.
“What about?” he asked, even though he had an idea. There had been many emails from the school in the past few months. Ellie was supposed to be on top of it (Giggy being her biological child) but of course had been too distracted with running her company. Todd was the one who had gone to meet with the teacher.
“They said I was stupid,” said Giggy.
“You’re not stupid, you know that, right?” he said firmly.
She hung her head. “Maybe I am.”
“No, you’re not.”
“I’m not smart like Sam,” she said, her blue eyes blazing. She worshipped her older sister; all three of the little ones did. Sam was their hero and idol.
“You’re smart in your own way, Giggy,” said Todd.
“What way is that?” said Giggy sullenly.
Todd thought about it. He wasn’t lying to her. He did think Giggy was smart, just not academic. “You’re smart like your mom is smart.”
“Really?”
“Yeah.” He put an arm around his daughter. He remembered how she’d smelled as a baby, like milk and powder. Her skin was so white it was translucent. “Look at me, I did well in school, but I don’t work anymore. Your mom never even went to college, and she can wipe the floor with everyone I went to Harvard with.”
Giggy giggled.
“It’s true,” he said with a smile.
Stepdad had not been in Todd’s vocabulary. His parents were strict midwestern Catholics; divorce was anathema, and blended families were regarded with pity. Of course he hadn’t planned on getting married four—was it truly four?—times. It was amazing he had only four children really. His parents both came from large families, and one of Todd’s uncles had ten children. Ten! Was it the nineteenth century or something? Who had ten children? Todd had no idea how much he disdained his upbringing until he left it—divorced his first, second, and third wives and left his only child and married a woman who already had a baby.
This baby.
He wanted Ellie so much he didn’t care what she came with, didn’t even really think about what it meant to marry a “single mom.” But a baby wasn’t luggage. Giggy was a person and, for the first four years of her life, called him Daddy. The problem arose when Archer came back into her life and Giggy discovered she and Todd weren’t related to each other at all. She’d pulled away, confused as to how she could have two dads. He’d been hurt when Giggy started calling Archer “Papa.”
Todd was her father. He was the one who found the private reading tutor. He was the one who made sure she had therapy. She wasn’t a special-needs kid but she had special needs. She was so much harder to deal with than Sam, who was meek and quiet, and the boys, who were naturally lovable.
The problem was that Giggy called him out on his shit. She made arch comments about his penchant for video games, and loudly wondered why he was home all the time. She was ten years old and already as tough as her mother. She looked the most like Ellie too, with her fair coloring and delicate features.
Giggy leaned on his shoulder.
“Want to get ice cream? I told the boys they could get dessert early. Do you want some too? We could go to the kitchen and see what gelato flavors the chef brought.”
She nodded.
Todd gave her shoulder a squeeze. Of all the things he had learned from being a more hands-on dad, it was that ice cream cured every ill. He thought of the party that was going on outside, and how peaceful it was in here.
“Maybe I’ll have one too,” he said.