Weeks of silence followed the inevitable rendezvous and my completion of nursing school. There wasn’t a celebration or a sense of accomplishment.
Life has continued to push forward, leaving me with nothing but an angry parent and a life-altering decision I must make between the Atlantic and Pacific coast—staying here in an unapproved relationship with Everett or leaving him behind for a career opportunity I should feel grateful to have.
I knew it was only a matter of time before Dad would catch onto me about Everett. I just didn’t know when or how long we might have to enjoy each other’s company without stress.
After the mortifying scene at the paratrooper exhibition, so many thoughts came to mind. I had a lot to fight for, but with the one person I would never want to fight. Dad and I argued for days. I eventually told him that if he felt the need to kick me out because of my differing beliefs on dating, going steady, or Everett in general, I would leave without a fight. He knows I don’t have many options for places to stay, but he is also aware I wouldn’t have too much trouble finding someone to take me in, and the small talk around base would be worse than the current situation we’re living.
Our conversations are brief within the house; nothing more than: hello, goodbye, goodnight, and thank you. He stopped asking where I was going when I left, and I lost interest in hiding my comings and goings. Everett seems determined to have a man-to-man talk with Dad, but I’ve requested that he doesn’t engage in this nonsense. If Dad didn’t make such a deal out of a relationship, Everett could join us for dinner at night and get to know the people I love most, but instead, the boys and I often have secret family dinners at diners without Dad. James and Lewis are fond of Everett, and their feelings toward him mean the world to me. They have both attempted to talk Dad down from his irrational thoughts but have gotten nowhere. I accept that Dad may never approve of anyone for me, and it will drive a wedge between us that we won’t be able to repair.
“There she is,” Everett says, greeting me with open arms. It’s unusual to find him out of uniform, but it’s Saturday night, and we’re going to see a picture at the theatre. Even when not dressed for work, he looks like a heartthrob who has fallen off a movie set. With his taupe fitted dress trousers, a matching vest and bow tie embellished by the vibrant white glow of his button-down shirt, he is sensational and will surely be a sight for sore eyes tonight among the ladies downtown. Everett doesn’t give me reason to worry about the others who noticed his presence here. The tight grip of his hand around mine is all I ever need to feel like nothing could ever go wrong. Together, we walk on water, and though it’s not always practical, the sparks between us make me forget about everything else. Love can do such crazy things.
He’s leaning against the passenger side door of his car, waiting for me to fall into his embrace. “Sorry for making you wait an extra minute. I was waiting on the silly kitchen timer so I could take their casserole out of the oven. I thought I had it all timed out to perfection, but—”
Everett wraps his arms around me and kisses my forehead. “Don’t be ridiculous. I’ve heard some women make a man wait for hours on her while she powders her face to go out for an evening.”
“Oh, no, I could never spend that much time preparing to go out so that I can come home and wash it all away.”
I straighten my posture to step back along the sidewalk so Everett can open the car door. “How is your father this evening?” Everett asks as he does whenever he picks me up at the house.
“I’m not sure. He’s had his head buried in work all day. I poked my head in to say goodbye and let him know dinner was on the table.”
I pinch my skirt to slide into the car, but before Everett can close the door, Dad steps outside onto the front step. He hasn’t been so forward since the exhibition, and I’m terrified of what he is about to say. “Are you truly going to the theatre tonight?” Dad calls out.
Everett clicks his heels together as if it’s an automated response and salutes Dad. The gesture makes me want to roll my eyes, but I refrain. “Yes, sir, I will have her home before ten. Is that all right, Sir?”
Dad slips his hands into his pockets and rolls back on his heels. “Maybe you would like to stay and join us for dinner instead?” I’m questioning if I’m hearing Dad correctly because those words would never form on his lips.
“Dad, we have plans with friends tonight.”
“We could postpone,” Everett whispers to me.
“No,” I reply in a harsh breath.
“He’s trying to make amends, Lizzie. Let’s take the chance.”
Everett did something I never imagined he would do. “Sir, we would love to join you for supper tonight. Lizzie was just saying how wonderful the casserole came out.”
“Why, I never!” My exasperation is uncontrollable in response to this uncomfortable “peace offering.”
“Something seems awry with your father. I’ll make it up to you. I promise, doll-face.” It’s hard to say no to his big green eyes when they’re staring at me like that, but he can clearly see how furious I am that he jumped at my father’s first invitation. It’s the least he deserves now—the very least. The only thing that’s off about Dad is the rude plan he probably has up his sleeve to trap Everett and threaten him to stay away from me.
“Just wonderful,” I mumble, swiveling out of the car. “Tomorrow morning, we’ll go up to Puu Ualakaa Lookout to have breakfast at sunrise like we’ve been discussing. How does that sound?”
It sounds like an enchanting distraction from this infuriating moment, but we have been talking about a sunrise picnic for weeks now, and I would love the opportunity with him. I all but groan before responding with cordiality. “All right, Mr. Hollywood. You win this time, but next time—”
“I can never win more than I’ve already won, gorgeous,” he says, reaching out to take my hand. He’s unashamed to walk into my house, claiming me as his even with my father inside.
Once inside, Dad pulls out the two extra chairs at the table. “Your brothers won’t be home in time for dinner. They had a drill to tend to.” I suppose this could be the reason Dad wanted us to eat with him. No one wants to dine alone. I can’t blame him, I guess, but he made his bed in this situation.
“A drill?” Everett asks, removing his cap while brushing the soil from his shoes on the entryway mat.
“Yes,” Dad responds.
Everett and Dad exchange a look I can’t decipher and one I don’t care to see. “Is everything okay?” I ask.
“Of course,” Dad says without skipping a beat. His eyes tell a different story, one he doesn’t think I can interpret, but there’s something on his mind, and he’s nervous about whatever it might be.
Everett doesn’t appear to be the slightest bit nervous, and yet I feel the need to go powder my nose because of the perspiration creeping up my neck. With a deep inhale through my nose and a slow exhale out my mouth, I do what I can to calm myself. I go to the cabinets to gather enough plates for the three of us, but as I place the china down onto the table, Dad stands up. “Elizabeth, sit down. I’ll take care of the rest.”
“I’m happy to help, Sir,” Everett offers.
“No, no, I’m all set. Thank you, son.”
Son. I smell a rat.
It doesn’t take long before we’re all sitting across from one another at the table, preparing to take our first bites. “How are things going here for you on this base, Lieutenant Anderson? I’ve heard nothing but wonderful feedback on the Army Air Corps program so far. It seems you men have everything in great working order.”
Small talk. Is that what this is? A way to waste time while we eat our meals so Dad can speed up to the part of the night where he sends Everett home. “The men in my squadron are super. We all get along just fine and have made a lot of progress with training over the last few months.”
“Good, good, I’m glad to hear it.” Dad takes a few bites of the casserole, and Everett follows his every move as inferior rank will do no matter the situation. “It’s a relief to know this base is becoming well rounded with expertise and support. Are you enjoying Oahu so far?”
This chatter is the most I’ve heard Dad speak in weeks, and I wish I could figure out the meaning behind this ploy.
“Oh yes, I’m very fond of the island. It’s much different from the last couple of places I trained. The scenery is unsurpassable here.” Everett throws me a spry glance and wink as Dad peers down to scoop up another bite. This charmer doesn’t miss an opportunity to make me blush. It’s as if he has a goal count set for the day. After spending months with Everett, my feelings, desire, and yearning to be with him has only grown.
“It is a wonderful place to live, isn’t it, Elizabeth?” Ah, Dad’s intention is crystal clear. This unexpected supper is his opportunity to discuss the decision I have less than a week to make. The hospital in Boston and the hospital here offered me a position to join their staff after the new year which is a month from now. However, I owe my decision to the chosen hospital three weeks before a start date.
“Of course,” I reply, taking my turn to fill my mouth with food.
“There aren’t many places in the United States where you find perfect year-round temperatures. In fact, I’m not sure I could settle down elsewhere after living here for so long. To imagine a life where the beach is more than a few minutes away or the temperatures fall below thirty degrees, I often wonder how people live in those conditions.”
The temptation to clear my throat in response to the amount of bologna coming from Dad’s mouth is astounding. We have gone on vacations to see snow-covered mountain-tops, and he hates the beach. In fact, he would be much happier if I never went to the beach here at all, and I don’t have a clue why that is.
“Oh, it’s not all that bad, Sir. Every part of this country has its pros and cons, I suppose. Though I might agree that Hawaii is hard to compete with in terms of perfect weather and scenery.”
“Precisely,” Dad says.
“Imagine wanting to move to New England in the dead of winter. Only a fool would be—”
“Enough,” I snap, tossing my napkin down onto the table. “How dare you prompt an agenda using supper as a cover-up for your selfish reasons? We had plans with friends tonight, and you persuaded us to stay here so you wouldn’t have to eat alone. I can only imagine you must have told Lewis and James not to come home for a bit so you could take this time to make your move.”
“Elizabeth, pardon me, but I don’t think it’s necessary to be acting so irrational in front of our guest right now. Please, take your seat.”
“You cannot tell me what to do any longer, Dad. I am a grown woman and don’t deserve that type of treatment.” The discomfort displaying within Everett’s wide stare is a blatant plea for me to pause this conversation until a later point, but the words are flowing like a waterfall, and I’m not sure I can contain my anger any longer. “My decision concerning which position I will accept has no bearing on the weather or location. I will receive unique experiences in each hospital, and those are the facts I am focusing on.”
For the first time since I have been offered the positions, I notice an inflection of disdain glistening within Everett’s eyes. We have had conversations about what is best for each of us versus what would be wonderful for the two of us together. The decision has been impossible to make. I don’t want to leave Everett, nor my family, despite Dad’s behavior at the moment, but Boston would open up a new world of possibilities, new adventures, sights, and the reputation of those hospitals cannot be beat. Some might call me a fool for choosing any other place to begin my career.
“It’s not safe out on the East Coast right now, Elizabeth. I don’t know how else to make you understand. You act as though you live in a safe bubble here on this island because soldiers, sailors, and airmen surround you. What you don’t realize is what is awaiting outside of this island. You are a Jewish woman walking around in a world that sees us as the enemy. Anti-Semitism may not be as obvious here in the United States, but I promise you, even though the thoughts are quiet, they are present more than you can imagine.”
I place my palms down on the table, the friction causes a hollow thud louder than intended. “How is it that anti-Semitism is obvious to you but no one else? What do you know that I don’t?” I question, trying my best to keep my tone down.
“You heard what Lindbergh said just a few months ago. Maybe you aren’t aware of the uprising caused by his blame against the Jewish people for this war, but it exists in places you can’t see unless you are there. And I don’t want you there.”
I shake my head with utter disappointment. “There was a brawl in New York. It’s over. I can’t live in fear of an occurrence that has come and gone. It’s not fair to ask that of me and you know it.”
“Elizabeth, they were Nazi supporters. Aside from that, there is no one for you to go to if you find trouble on the East Coast. In another situation, at a different time, I would encourage you to spread your wings and fly, but I’ve already lost one love of my life, and I refuse to lose another. My job on earth is to keep you safe, and it is not safe outside of this base right now, despite what you assume.”
My heart pounds so hard, every bone in my body aches. This career path was supposed to be my decision, no one else’s.
“Sir, is something going on that we are unaware of?” Everett inquires.
Dad’s gaze falls to his half-empty plate of food. “No, we don’t know what tomorrow might bring. That’s all.” He isn’t looking Everett in the eyes. Dad doesn’t speak without making direct eye-contact. Not unless he’s lying.
“Elizabeth says the same, but with all due respect, Sir, if we don’t know what tomorrow might bring, why should we live in fear of the unknown?”
Dad’s face burns with a red hue, a distinct emotion I don’t recall seeing before. He drops his fork to the glass plate and the shattering clink echoes within the dangling crystals of the chandelier above our heads. He presses the napkin against his mouth and tosses it onto his plate. “Because I said so, dammit, that’s why.” With his final statements on the matter, Dad stands and retreats to his bedroom, then slams the door with unnecessary force.
“I think there might be something going on here,” Everett whispers.
I slap my hands down against my lap, frustrated beyond words. “Why, what do you mean?”
Everett folds his hands, resting them on the table as if to display a sense of calm while I’m foaming at the mouth. “I’m not sure, but I’ll see what I can do about finding out.”
Dad got his way. He spoiled the night for us all. “We will need to postpone our breakfast plans for tomorrow morning now, I assume?” It’s hard to force a sense of cheer after such a mortifying scene, but I feel like all my opportunities of joy become stolen in some way or another.
Everett places his hand on top of mine. “No, of course not. I wouldn’t miss the opportunity for anything in the world, gorgeous. Meet me outside at zero six hundred hours tomorrow morning, and we’ll go.”
His agreement to keep our plans almost helps me forget about the fit we just witnessed, but I doubt my mind will rest easy tonight while stewing on each word Dad said. “I’m looking forward to the morning, then.”
I pause for a moment, preparing to clear the plates, but an unsettling shadow falls over my shoulders, weighing me down to the seat. “Everett, is there any truth to what he said?” I turn to face him, needing to see the answer within his eyes.
He lifts my hand and holds it between his, offering me warmth and comfort, a gesture to ease the blow of whatever he has to say next. “I’m not exactly sure, Lizzie. A lot is going on in the world right now, and it’s hard to assume the safety of anyone’s location. You know I’m not the one who will hold you back from fulfilling your desires, but if the question is about safety, I can’t say I disagree with your father.”
“So, you agree with him then?”
Everett lifts my knuckles to his lips. I assume he is trying to ease the anger he must see rising through my burning cheeks. “Don’t ask me to take sides, please, darling.”
It pains me to pull my hand from this, but this isn’t fair. “I didn’t, but it’s clear whose side you have chosen.” I take my hand from Everett’s, placing it down on my lap. “Well, then I guess it’s settled.”
Everett leans forward and presses his finger below my chin. “Look at me, doll,” he says with a look full of empathy. “I will support whatever decision you make. I might worry like crazy about you, but this is your life and your right to decide. I want to know you’re safe. I wouldn’t forgive myself if I didn’t express my concerns, and something happened to you. I’m sure you must understand where I’m coming from?”
“Are you saying this because I’m a Jewish woman or because I’m a woman who wants to move across the country to fulfill a career I am passionate about?”
“I won’t lie to you, Lizzie, both reasons should be considered when you make this decision.”
I feel empty inside, like someone has flipped me upside down and is shaking me to pieces. Mom wouldn’t give in to fear. She would stand tall and ferociously show her pride to be a Jewish woman. How can I take a step back and undo what she spent her life working toward? Why does it matter who I am? “This world is despicable. No one can be who they are or want to be without criticism or law standing in the way. We are to be what the world dictates, and I’m done succumbing to conformity.”