41

Kenmore, are you planning to shut down the store?” It was early afternoon before Kelli worked up the nerve to ask the next question on her mind.

He sighed, then nodded. “Yeah. Just between you and me, that has been my plan for a while now. Business had dropped off enough that I was losing too much money to keep it going. Things changed for the better after you got here, but I can’t keep it up by myself.”

“You can hire someone to replace me.”

“I can hire someone else to help me out in the store, but it was your vision for running things that made us profitable again. That’s not the kind of thing you can just find off the street. Besides, if you remember correctly, I hadn’t even planned to replace Frieda until you came along, because I knew the store would be closing.”

“You might find someone you like better. You’ll never know if you don’t try.”

“Nah. To tell you the truth, I just don’t think I have the heart for it anymore. This was my family’s store, and I kept it going a long time for that reason. And then when you came, it all got exciting again—not just because business had picked up, but also because I was thankful both of us had a chance to work through some of what had happened. After you leave, though, I think I’m just done.”

“But Kenmore . . .” She couldn’t decide how she wanted to finish that sentence, only knew that it was important that she say the right thing to convince him to change his mind.

“The fiftieth anniversary of the store is in October. I plan to keep it open until then, and then it’s time for me to move into the world of retirement.”

“That makes me sad, to think of this place closed.”

“To tell you the truth, it makes me sad, too. But there’s not that much we can do about it.” He stopped what he was doing to look her directly in the eyes. “Unless, that is, you want to stay.”

“I can’t.” She twirled a pack of Life Savers around on the counter, watching the reds, oranges, and yellows spin before her. “You know I can’t.” She picked up the pack and put it back in its place.

“A couple of months ago, I would have agreed with you. Probably even a few weeks ago. But Kelli, I’ve got to tell you, I’ve been watching what is happening, and let me tell you, girl, you belong here. You belong with them.”

“I wish that were true.” She shook her head. “I can’t stay, you know I can’t.”

“You’re wrong. Dead wrong. Spend a little time thinking about it, and I believe you will come to agree with me.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “You can stay and work at the store, build it up into something you can take over. You’ve got a natural gift for it. You can stay in the duplex as long as you need to, put down some roots.”

“I can’t talk about this anymore.” Kelli knew deep down that Kenmore was right. If she kept listening, she would change her mind and stay, and that would make things very hard. For everyone she loved.

Shane took Kelli’s hand as they walked downtown together, and she moved closer out of instinct. Another perfect Thursday Night Lights evening—this time without a glimpse of Amy, making it that much better. This is wrong. You can’t do this. Her inner voice was soon countered with It’s no big deal. You just had sandwiches and watched a band. It’s not like you’re getting serious or anything.

The two sides went back and forth, back and forth.

Kelli took a deep breath. “There’s something I need to tell you.”

“Yeah?” He smiled down at her. “Tell me everything.”

Oh, how I wish I could, but I can’t, so this will have to do. “Well, it’s just that . . . I . . .” She had no choice but to continue. She had to put a stop to this. “I have a boyfriend back in California. He’s really more like an unofficial fiancé.”

Shane dropped her hand. “What? Why didn’t you tell me?”

She looked down at the ground as they kept walking. Everything inside her wanted to confess the lie and then fall into his arms. But that was a choice that could not be allowed. “I, well, I mean, for the first month or so I was here, you pretty much hated me, so it wasn’t an issue. After that, it just never seemed like the right time.”

“What about that kiss? And our time together tonight? You weren’t exactly fighting me off.”

“No. No, I wasn’t, but I should have. I . . .” This was harder than she’d expected it to be. “It was a mistake.”

By now, they had made it to where his car was parked. He opened the trunk and put the chairs inside. “I make it a point of pride to avoid being other people’s mistakes. I can assure you that I will not be your problem again.”

“Shane, it’s not like that. You don’t understand—”

“I understand enough to know that it’s time to get out of here.” He drove her home in silence.

When they pulled into her driveway, she opened the door but turned to him. “I’m really sorry.”

“Good-bye, Kelli.” He didn’t look her direction.

“Good-bye, Shane.” She went inside and cried. Something that had become all too familiar as of late.

“Knock, knock.” Kelli used the key she’d been given to let herself into Beth’s house.

“Come on back,” Beth called from the bedroom.

Kelli lugged her canvas bag into Beth’s room. “Okay, I brought supplies. Let’s see, a couple of chick flicks on DVD, nail polish, microwave popcorn, and a deck of cards, just in case.”

Beth looked through the loot Kelli had just dropped on the bed. “I haven’t had a girls’ sleepover in about ten years.”

“Well, then it’s about time. Good thing Rand got called out of town on business.”

“This isn’t just a sympathy sleepover, right? Because I’m on bed rest and you’re feeling sorry for me?”

“No, but let’s be honest, if you weren’t on bed rest, we’d be out on the town—well, at least dinner and a movie. So, no, the event itself is not about your bed rest, but the activities have been toned down to suit it.”

Beth took a big gulp out of the liter-sized water bottle she always had at her bedside and nodded. “Good, then. Let’s proceed with the modified girl fun.”

When Rand had been called out of town for a trip that would take almost a week, Kelli had volunteered to stay with Beth on Friday and Saturday night, so that Alison could teach her classes and work on the kids’ musical at church. She would come back in on Sunday night and take over until Rand got home on Tuesday.

“First on our agenda is telling me what happened between you and Shane.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, you two were all grins and giggles, then suddenly you’re both moping around like you’ve lost your best friend. I know you both like each other, but obviously something happened. What was it?”

Kelli thought about how to answer this and decided there wasn’t a lot of harm in mostly telling the truth. She shrugged. “I told him that I couldn’t see him anymore because I have a boyfriend back home.”

“Wait, what? You have a boyfriend back home? How come I’ve never heard about him? Are you holding out on me?”

“No.” Kelli picked up a bottle of nail polish and twirled it around. “I mean, I did have a boyfriend, but we broke up a few months ago.”

Beth folded her arms across her rapidly expanding midsection. “Spill.”

“I caught him cheating, end of story. It wasn’t like I was in love with the guy. We hadn’t been dating that long.”

“I didn’t mean about him, although we’ll get to him later. I mean, spill about why you would make up an excuse not to see Shane anymore, when it’s so obvious you enjoy being around him.”

Kelli shrugged. “That’s exactly it. I came to realize that I was liking to spend time with Shane a lot—quite a lot, actually. Since I’m going to be leaving here at the end of next month, I just thought it was best that I put some distance between us before things got too serious. I don’t want to leave here with a bunch of regret.”

“Haven’t you ever heard of long-distance relationships? People do it all the time. Between texting, Skype, and airplanes, it’s not like it’s not doable.” Oh how Kelli wished that were true in her case. But she knew that keeping a relationship going with Shane would also keep a relationship going with Beth and Alison. By now, she knew it was going to be excruciating to leave here and not tell them who she was. If the relationship continued long-term after that, it would be impossible. There had to be a clean break.

“For most people that would work fine, but I’m just not one of them.”

“And why not for you, exactly?”

“It’s just not something I can do, okay? Besides, I told you, after I get back to California, I’ll be in the thick of opening up a restaurant with my friends. I’ll need to invest every spare minute I have into making sure that it works.”

“Sounds like an excuse to me, but it’s your life.”

If that’s what Beth believed, Kelli was glad for it. Little did she know that it wasn’t just Kelli’s life—it was her life, too. And her mother’s. And the brother Kelli had never met. If letting Beth believe she was afraid of commitment was what it took to give some peaceful closure, then so be it. Kelli was glad for the easier excuse.

“Now, let’s put in one of these movies, okay?”