A CENSOR’S TALK

When you are in that country

you must spread the good news about us

and praise our marvelous land:

here children all enjoy free education,

the old are cared for, the sick treated,

people live and work happily,

united in social harmony.

You can say our life is sweeter than honey

(although there’re a few lost ones

who squander public money for debauchery).

Moreover, our economy grows by the day.

Now it’s so easy to travel and communicate.

This country is rich and vast,

a garden of bliss in every way.

When you return from that country

you must bring back their bad news:

people there all live miserable lives,

most families are deep in debt,

men drink excessively and carry arms,

women are loose and shameless,

citizens burn their national flag in the open

and even curse their president on television,

children cannot see the purpose of life,

abuse drugs and indulge in sex,

many young girls get pregnant and some give birth,

common people have no chance to excel,

their economy has kept declining

and will soon collapse.

Don’t smirk like that.

I know what’s on your mind.

You’ve been thinking how to emigrate

so you can live in that country for good.

If so, you’d better shut up.

And don’t come back.