Chapter One
Becoming a Deb is a Difficult Matter: Who Did the Season, and Why ?

They were called Guinevere and Georgina and Ghislaine and June, the debutantes of 1939; Patty and Betty and Dorothy and Nan. One of them, an unfortunate girl for reasons quite apart from her name, was called Doreen. There were, as the Daily Mail’s gossip column pointed out on 19 May in its account of Queen Charlotte’s Ball, a number of unusual names that year: Osla, Lilita, Quenelda, Yolanda, Merelina, Isalina, Freydis, Magdalen and Colin were just a few of them – names that might have featured in a debutante parody of T.S.Eliot’s The Naming of Cats, if debs read poetry, or wrote parodies. There were names redolent of the thirties, like Pearl and Susan (which they pronounced ‘Syoosan’) and Anthea and Jean, Rhoda and Joan and Audrey and Muriel. There were, as always among the English upper classes, names like Elizabeth, Mary, Diana, Sarah. They had double-barrelled surnames like Bowes-Lyon, Leveson-Gower (pronounced ‘Looson-Gore’, and woe betide anyone who did not know it), Spencer-Churchill and Windsor-Clive: names that, to the initiated, immediately conjured up titles, country seats and many thousands of acres. Ten of them bore titles, and so did about a third of their mothers, especially if one includes Hons.

So who were they, the debutantes of 1939?

All of them were born in the years immediately after the end of the First World War. Seventeen was the earliest age at which a girl might be presented, eighteen was more usual, so this was the generation of the early 1920s. They had grown up never knowing anything but peace, although their parents were deeply scarred by war.

They nearly all shared the same background: that of the English upper classes. They were aristocrats, or landed gentry, or at the very least they came from families who had been wealthy and established for a couple of generations. Few of them were Roman Catholic, almost none was Jewish. The girls who did not share this background of wealth, land or title (preferably all three) were the unfortunates.

The word ‘snob’ has changed its meaning in the last fifty years. It used to mean someone looking up; it has come to mean someone looking down, defined in the OED Supplement (1986) as ‘One who despises those who are considered inferior in rank, attainment or taste’1 – particularly, in the English class system, rank. In the older meaning of the word, the English upper classes had no need for snobbery. They constituted an elite which believed itself to be uniquely fitted to rule, whether as builders of the Empire, members of both Houses of Parliament or landowners. The class war which raged in the 1930s scarcely troubled them. Born to superiority, possessed of the looks that they believed resulted from many generations of breeding (they always cited racehorses to prove their point) and the taste that came from living with beautiful things bequeathed by their forebears, they were not snobbish. It hardly ever occurred to them that anyone else could matter. They valued beautiful manners among their own kind. To everyone else they were polite – because ‘a gentleman is never rude unintentionally’.

In time, however, it became possible for a socially ambitious mother and a very rich father to buy their daughter’s way into the Season. They could pay a lady to sponsor their child, present her at Court and hold a dance for her. It was well known that the Countess of Clancarty and Lady St John of Bletso, for instance, charged around £2,000 to bring a girl out. Discreet advertisements would appear in The Times: ‘Peeress would chaperone debutante – every advantage’, followed by a box number. Here is how one deb of that era remembers these two:

Old Lady Clancarty was a bit of a mystery. She was rather a battle-axe, and rumour had it that she had been the Earl’s cook before he married her. Her face was set in those hardened lines that develop on women’s faces if they have to work all their lives, so perhaps it was true that she had been his housekeeper, or something of the sort. She wasn’t unpleasant, just very uncommunicative. She had a hatchet jaw and always looked tense. However, despite all this, Alma Le Poer Trench [Lady Clancarty’s daughter] and her two brothers were all tall, charming and good-looking, so I suspect they may have been the offspring of the first marriage. It was very hard luck on the girls who had to resort to paid presenters: not that people were unkind to them, I think, but just that they must have felt so out of place. I remember one afternoon in 1939 we ran into Lady Clancarty at Hurlingham, and as we walked along a path with her and Alma, one of her poor, unattractive, clumsy-looking protégées, a girl with a north-country accent, trailed along behind. I remember trying to chat her up, but it was such hard going that I soon gave up.

Lady St John of Bletso was quite the opposite, except that she too was enigmatic. I remember sitting next to her round her fireside at Ennismore Gardens after dinner one night, trying to read what was behind that self-satisfied face and wondering what it was like to be brought out by her. She was small and doll-like. Her blonded hair and enamelled skin gave her an impenetrable appearance, and she hardly bothered to speak to any of us.

One of Lady St John’s protégées that Season (they were known disparagingly as ‘the Bletsoes’ or ‘one of the Blets’) was a girl called Doreen Davison. Twenty years later – even though presentation at Court had ended in 1958 – Lady St John was still sponsoring debutantes, parents still subjecting daughters to social humiliation (for of course everyone knew) in the hope that they might encounter an impoverished peer whose family fortunes had dwindled to the point where he was prepared to marry a girl whose parents were recently rich. It had worked, after all, for several generations of American heiresses. Occasionally it still worked. One ex-deb said,

There were perhaps half a dozen mamas each Season who were rich (very rich!), nouveaux riches, and were on the prowl to find very eligible but perhaps impecunious husbands for their daughters. One very aggressive one had two daughters and a son for whom she, triumphantly, found members of the aristocracy. One is now a countess, another married a baronet of long lineage, and one of her granddaughters is married to a duke!

Parents paid £2,000, not simply so that their daughter could curtsey to the King and Queen, but in the hope that she would be one of the lucky few who married well. Some of these daughters of nouveaux riches, social-climbing parents rose to the challenge and even enjoyed it; for others, as Vivien Mosley (now Mrs Forbes Adams) recalls, it was a dreadful experience:

I think it was complete and unadulterated hell for a great many of them and it was wicked and cruel of their parents to do it. But I do think there was another lot who simply revelled in it, and were actually only too delighted to be pushed. But I was aware that there was a nucleus of girls who obviously had an absolutely beastly time, didn’t want to be in that position and were just being forced to, for what even in those days seemed to me to be absolutely ludicrous motives. I remember one or two who actually wept; but besides them there were a lot who spent time in the Ladies. Though even there, some of them were having an awfully jolly time – they just thought, well, fish my mother, if she’s making me do this and I’m not being frightfully successful, then I’ll go and have a good time in the Ladies’ loo with my chum! And they did: and Mum or the chaperone was left sitting on her gold chair looking agonized about where her daughter was because she wasn’t being swept round the floor.

The parents’ motives weren’t just the hope that their daughter would get a good husband – although some did – but to move into a world that they, the parents, couldn’t have got their girl in amongst. The girls for whom it didn’t work were the ones who didn’t want that. But they knew there was an awful lot on their back – it was costing a fortune – they were disappointing their parents’ high hopes – absolute torture.

Marrying well was the raison d’être of the Season. One of the debs escorts said bluntly: ‘The Season was invented by the match-making mothers to put their daughters into the marriage market, and to get the biggest catch possible, preferably a millionaire duke. It was the mothers who invented and perpetuated the Season.’ Many of the debs of 1939 disagree, preferring not to define it so blatantly. Nicholas Mosley (now Lord Ravensdale) put it thus: ‘The run-up to war during 1939 coincided with what was known as the “coming out” of my sister Vivien: this was the complex of rituals by which eighteen-year-old girls were initiated into membership of the upper-class tribe.’2

‘Ritual’, ‘initiate’, ‘tribe’ – the English upper classes, like any other closed social system, preserved their exclusivity by means of customs, codes and language which few outsiders could emulate. These social rituals began long before a girl was presented at Court. From cradle to christening, from nursery to schoolroom, from holidays to finishing school, the fledgling debutante of 1939 had already taken part in a series of rigidly prescribed social conventions that had changed little over the last hundred years. It was because, in a sense, the parvenues were entering this world eighteen years after the other debs – who had inhabited it since birth – that they faced such an ordeal. Lady Cathleen Eliot said: ‘Family was essential; and to debs from good families the rest simply didn’t count. They would be ignored. You know: somebody looks at you and you just look at them expressionless and your eyes move on. Like that.’

The Times used to be called the noticeboard of the upper classes and in its columns, preferably listed under the Court Circular, births and christenings were announced in an unvarying formula. ‘The Hon. Mrs So-and-so has given birth to a daughter at Queen Charlotte’s Hospital’ (or some exclusive nursing home) would be followed a few weeks later by ‘Princess Helena Victoria [or some other exalted personage] stood sponsor to Major and the Hon. Mrs So-and-so’s infant daughter, who was christened at —— church. The Bishop of x officiated and the child was named Elizabeth Frances Laetitia. In addition to Princess Helena Victoria the godparents were …’. Details of the christening robe would follow, mentioning that it was of Brussels or Honiton lace and perhaps referring to previous occasions when it had been used. These announcements launched the baby girl upon her preordained path. Her names would be those of her most important godmother, her mother or one of her grandmothers, and perhaps her wealthiest maiden aunt. Her godparents would have been selected with an eye to the status they could bestow upon the baby.

After this she retreated into anonymity for some years. Her care was handed over to a nanny, preferably one who had been with the family for a long time, ideally having nursed her mother as well; and one or more nursery maids. Between 1921 and 1939 there were still between a quarter and half a million nannies in England and Wales, and about one and a quarter million domestic servants remained in 1939. Nannies were often rampant snobs, and they instilled an acute awareness of the details of English upper-class behaviour into their young charges:

It took many years for an outsider to master the complex, subtle distinctions, the nuances of accent, attitude, behaviour and misbehaviour, which went into, indeed go into, that living, changing thing, English upper-class snobbism. And Nannies were outsiders. Suddenly they found themselves thrown into a world in which the very air was electric with snobbery. As a result, they had to invent snobbish distinctions…. nice (that is upper-class) children never whisper, have white knicker linings, and Chilprufe next to the skin. Vulgar children (always vulgar, it was common to say common) said Hip, hip, hooray; ‘we’ said Hurrah.3

Jessica Mitford, in her autobiography Hons and Rebels, conveys exactly the same impression of a closed world:

Swinbrook [the house built by her father for his family] had many aspects of a fortress or citadel of mediaeval times. From the point of view of its inmates it was self-contained in the sense that it was neither necessary nor, generally, possible to leave the premises for any of the normal human pursuits…. From the point of view of outsiders, entry, in the rather unlikely event that they might seek it, was an impossibility. According to my father, outsiders included not only Huns, Frogs, Americans, blacks and all other foreigners, but also other people’s children … in fact, the whole teeming population of the earth’s surface….

Unity, Debo and I were thrown much on our own resources. As a lost tribe, separated from its fellow men, gradually develops distinctive characteristics of language, behaviour, outlook, so we developed idiosyncrasies that would no doubt have made us seem a little eccentric to other children of our age. Even for England, in those far-off days of the middle ‘twenties, ours was not exactly a conventional upbringing.4

Of course, Jessica Mitford may be exaggerating the foibles of her upbringing, just as her family is an exaggerated version of the English upper class. But the tribal nature of such an upbringing, its narrowness, its ritualistic behaviour, and the codes according to which it lived and spoke and ate and played, were real enough.

This world opened up more for girls when it became normal practice to send daughters to school, sometimes even to boarding school, as had long been the case with their brothers. Girls need not be clever, but they must be ‘agreeable’: that ubiquitous upper-class word that meant, in the case of a child, nicely mannered and not a show-off. Other accomplishments were far more important than cleverness. All country children rode and hunted, and girls as well as boys were expected to be ‘plucky’ on the hunting field. Skiing was not yet a universal pastime, but playing a decent game of tennis was considered essential. Both sexes would have gone to dancing classes from an early age, probably about six or seven years old, while more recently Madame Vacani or Miss Ballantine would have drilled them in the art of the full Court curtsey. This tricky manoeuvre entailed crooking one knee behind the other and sinking to the floor as low as you could go while keeping your back straight and ensuring that you could get up again in the same graceful movement. It was as difficult as it sounds and everyone dreaded falling over – though there is no record of anyone actually having done so. The last and still the most important attribute of the aspiring debutante was to be pretty. It would be nice if she were witty as well – no, not witty exactly, but amusing: the grown-up equivalent of being agreeable as a child. The fathers would describe a lively, good-humoured girl as amusing; the mothers would call her charming; and her contemporaries would say ‘she’s great fun’.

It is extremely difficult to estimate precisely how many girls were presented in 1939, and how many of those ‘did’ the Season thoroughly, going to dances and parties almost every night and attending the major social events. The Lord Chamberlain’s Office lists 1,657 ‘general circle’ presentations in 1939, with an additional 175 from the Diplomatic Corps. But of the former number, a high proportion – more than a third – were women being re-presented upon marriage, or when they changed their style (meaning that they, or their husbands, took a different title). If one assumes that between 900 and 1,000 of the ‘general circle’ presentations were young girls ‘coming out’ – being presented for the first time – this gives a number at least three times higher than the number doing the Season twenty-five or thirty years later. But in 1939, as so many of the debutantes of that year have stressed, it was taken for granted that everybody from ‘the right sort of families’ came out. Girls had no choice.

From that total of 900 or a thousand girls, only about one-third wanted, or could afford, to do the Season in the full sense. Many were simply presented, and then went straight back home to the country and carried on their normal lives, attending a few local dances perhaps, but otherwise taking no part in the round of the summer’s events. In a few other cases, girls did the Season, but without being presented. Lady Cathleen Eliot, daughter of the sixth Earl of St Germans, was – rather surprisingly – one such. She was never presented at Court (‘too expensive’, she says); but her name and picture were frequently in Society magazines, and although she did not have a dance of her own, she was invited to most of the Season’s parties – her title ensured that.

One hundred and three girls announced their dances in The Times’ weekly Social column ; but here again these were not the only dances given or even the grandest ones. Thus one can only make an informed guess ; and on this basis it is probable that between 200 and 400 girls took part in a ceaseless social whirl that can have left them no time for anything else. Among these was an inner circle of about a hundred girls who, in the absence of a single, outstanding ‘Deb of the Year’ (a concept invented by the media), would all have been popular, attractive, well bred and (mostly) rich. Inevitably, it is with that one hundred that this book mainly deals. Most of the rest flared briefly, like fireworks, in one moment of glory, and then vanished again.

There were 228 debutantes at Queen Charlotte’s Ball at Grosvenor House on 17 May, and five duchesses: of Marlborough, Buccleuch, Montrose, Grafton and Sutherland. Because of this unusual plethora of duchesses, guests were asked to wear tiaras, white gloves and decorations. ‘In this way we expect to get people to dress up again and get away from their present gas-mask mood,’ said the Daily Mail’s diarist Neronically. Analysis of nearly half of them – the 103 debs whose names featured in The Times’ list of the Season’s dances – shows that 37 had titled mothers or sponsors. A great many debs were presented not by their own mothers, but by their most well-connected female relative. This was not the same thing as having a paid presenter: far from it. Viscountess Astor, for example, gave a dance for her niece Dinah Brand: in this case because Dinah’s mother, the former Phyllis Langhorne, had died in 1937. A girl might be sponsored by her grandmother or, like Lady Mary Pratt, by both her grandmothers: her mother, the Countess of Brecknock, was Lady-in-Waiting to the Duchess of Kent, which probably left little time for the rigours of a deb’s mother’s social round. Of these 103 debs, at least 42 had parents listed in Who’s Who, while in the case of another 14 the family was listed. All titled people were automatically included in Who’s Who, while Debrett’s Peerage and Baronetage made no pretence of valuing merit or achievement. A title was all that was required, or some family connection, however remote, with a title. One of the most anxious chores for girls not born into the ‘upper crust’ must have been the hours spent poring over Burke and Debrett to ensure that they knew by heart the ramifications of the family trees of all dukes, marquesses, earls, viscounts and barons. If they aspired to marry into the peerage they would have to learn by rote what other girls had imbibed at Nanny’s knee, or from their parents’ gossip.

Another infallible indicator of gentle birth was holding one’s coming-out dance at home: be it London house or country seat. More than thirty debutantes on The Times’ list (not necessarily the ones with titled mothers) gave dances at home. Even in 1939 there was some residual snobbery about entertaining in a public place. Times had changed since the nineteenth century, when every aristocratic family had a mansion in London where they could entertain several hundred guests. Lady Alexandra Metcalfe, Marquess Curzon’s youngest daughter, recalls with something like disbelief today that when she was a little girl, in the years just before the First World War, she and her friends would play games in their parents’ ballrooms. After that war, very many of those great houses were sold ; a private ballroom became a rarity; and all except the very richest were forced to hold coming-out dances in hotels, or in one of the remaining large houses, like 16 Bruton Street, that were owned by caterers and hired out for the evening. By far the most popular single venue for debs’ dances was 6 Stanhope Gate, a house bordering Park Lane upon whose site the Playboy Club used to stand. In those days it was owned by Searcy’s, the large catering company, who ran it as Gunter’s Tearooms during the day and a ballroom in the evenings. Of those 103 dances listed in The Times’ diary for the Season, no fewer than 11 were held at 6 Stanhope Gate. After that, the most fashionable place for one’s dance was Claridge’s, followed by the Hyde Park Hotel, the Dorchester and the Berkeley.

The cost of these parties was astronomical. The food and drink alone would have cost about 30 shillings a head, or £1.50, to say nothing of the cost of massed banks of flowers, a fashionable dance band, and evening dresses for the debutante, her mother and her sisters. All this meant that a dance which cost under £1,000 was a modest affair: yet in those days £1,000 would have been a very generous annual salary for a professional man, and wealth undreamed of for anyone from the working class.

A dance given at home would have been marginally less expensive and had much more social cachet: ‘The refinement of private-house entertainment was of a different order. It was much less vulgar than a public place like a hotel, because you couldn’t buy your way in.’ Once a hotel dance was under way, any couple who sported the appropriate clothes and voices could stroll in from the street and gatecrash, as many did. No gatecrashers, however, could have strolled unnoticed into Mary Windsor-Clive’s dance at 15 Hyde Park Gardens, or that of Rhoda Walker-Heneage-Vivian a few doors down at Number 8, for the family retainers would have asked them politely to produce an invitation or leave. Therein lay the prestige: giving a dance in one’s own house, among one’s own furniture and paintings and servants, was the clearest possible proof that the girl was a ‘real’ deb, emerging to take her rightful position in a society which knew her parents and had noticed the social stepping-stones that had brought her to this point.

Since the Season was expensive, exhausting and a social ordeal for all but the most poised, why did anyone – parents or daughters – submit to it? Setting aside for a moment its real purpose, to introduce eligible young people to one another in a safe and enjoyable setting, what other function might it fulfil? Certainly most of the debutantes, and their escorts, claim fifty years later that it was fun. They usually go on to qualify this by saying that it was extremely tiring. During the height of the Season, from late April until the end of July, a debutante would need all her youth and stamina.

Lady Turnbull’s daughter Madeleine, who had been a deb a couple of years earlier, remembers:

There were far more dances than in post-war days; four or five a week at least, and very often one went to more than one dance a night. Then there were countless fork luncheon and drink parties. It was all quite hard work! – especially if one had to go to two or three luncheon parties on the same day – and partook of a course at each!

A girl and her mother, or some other chaperone, would rarely get home before two in the morning; only to rise again by nine or ten o’clock – ‘because it was inconsiderate to the servants to keep them waiting when one’s bed had to be made and the bedroom tidied’. However frivolous dancing and making conversation may be considered, they can be quite taxing, particularly to young people who know they are constantly being evaluated, both by their contemporaries and by the older generation. Chaperones – usually mothers – sat around the room and watched like hawks. Rosamund Neave (now Mrs Tony Sheppard) remembers that well:

There was a lot of snobbery about and people were angling for the best match. You saw the chaperones and the dowagers in their tiaras looking through their lorgnettes to see if somebody was pretty or not and whether they thought she would be a nice person for their son or her cousin’s friend or whoever it was. There was always a certain amount of that. It meant that some of the girls were very keen to be asked by Lord So-and-So to dance. My mother always got frightfully excited and would ask, ‘Who did you meet did you say, darling? Oh, Lord Halifax’s son. Oh yes, of course, very nice, yes.’ So Mummy was slightly snobby but I wasn’t interested in all that; I just wanted to have fun.

Faces were scrutinized for everything from family likeness to the presence (or, more likely, absence) of make-up. Clothes were criticized: where from? who made it? how much did it cost? is it new – altered – borrowed – passed down? Girls lived in fear of being caught out in a solecism like having a strap showing or – nightmare – a knicker elastic giving way. Everyone carried a chain of tiny gold safety-pins hidden away in her evening purse, in case energetic dancing called for immediate repairs, and cloakroom ladies had needle and cotton to stitch up snagged hems. Young girls – many of them over-protected and little more than children – were very much aware that they were on show ; that ‘coming out’ meant (as it does in quite a different context today) submitting oneself to public scrutiny. It is too crude to liken it to a cattle market; circling the paddock before a race would be more appropriate.

The Season, then, was a forum in which to see and be seen by perhaps two thousand people, of whom several hundred were contemporaries of both sexes, and the remainder were parents, family, friends. It was a forum which gave a girl a chance to prove herself and make her mark in a few short months, knowing that whatever impression she created might remain for the rest of her life. Could such a formidable exposure of oneself possibly be called an enjoyable experience ?

For those debutantes who were poised, pretty and beautifully turned out, yes, it must have been enjoyable – a game, a nightly parade which would be exhilarating to those who knew they were among the front runners. A young woman recently liberated from school or finishing school could well have revelled in the attention that suddenly focused upon her, after years of Nanny saying primly, ‘Nobody’s going to be looking at you, dear!’ Suddenly all that had changed. Seamstresses knelt at her feet with pins between their lips, adjusting her hem or smoothing her seams ; milliners set wide-brimmed picture hats or witty little confections cleverly askew at just the angle to accentuate her cheekbones; her parents and her sisters frowned and judged and finally approved. Goodness, it must have been intoxicating … for some.

But for the girls who knew themselves to be less well endowed with a pretty face, a slender figure, a generous papa and an understanding mother, it must have been like stumbling dazzled into a spotlight. The girl with bad skin; the fat girl; the one who had not outgrown her clumsiness or mastered her shyness ; the girl whose mother had no dress sense or whose father was penny-pinching; above all, the girl who knew that she did not fit into the social milieu to which her parents aspired – for these girls it must have been a daily and nightly ordeal, three or four months of it, that they dreaded in advance and loathed when it happened. Interviews with ex-debs (none of whom admits to having been in this position of social ignominy herself) suggest that a number of girls did indeed hate their Season:

There were always some girls crying in the Ladies; and a few who would spend practically the entire evening there. Some girls were definitely cold-shouldered by the others ; mostly because they lacked personality and confidence and just couldn’t carry it off. That’s why it was such a good training. You had to learn to be snubbed – you had to learn how to cope with not being a big social success, not getting all the gorgeous young men. If you hadn’t got the polish, you soon learned. Otherwise you’d spend the evening talking to the cloakroom attendant. There was a lot of cruelty and a lot of competitiveness, and that meant a lot of humiliation. Some girls suffered agonies. Some of the mothers had no idea what they were exposing their girls to. They just wanted them to have a good time. There’s a sort of gallantry – almost a heroism – about the upper crust, and these girls didn’t want to fail their mothers.

The Season was, and was meant to be, a social testing ground. It taught very young girls – much younger, in terms of worldliness, than today’s sophisticated eighteen-year-olds – how to behave gracefully in a crowd of strangers. It taught them how to make conversation, even if much of it was frivolous. It taught them discipline: a discipline that stood some of them in very good stead during the years that followed. ‘It was an endurance test,’ said one deb, who nevertheless adored her Season, ‘a real ordeal.’ It taught good manners, in the widest sense of the word ; not merely how to enter and leave a room unselfconsciously, bestowing your hellos and goodbyes with charm and warmth (which is harder than it may sound), but how to deal with the ‘difficult customers’ . Every dance had its quota of awkward young men and lecherous uncles, jealous mothers and crotchety chaperones, unhappy or exhausted young women. At its best, the Season taught a schoolgirl, cosseted and over-protected, how to handle all these situations with tact.

We were being groomed for a role. It was a tough little world too. The system gave you a little more polish and you emerged with a little more grace, a little more cynicism.

To be frank, it either made you or broke you. If anything was the proper training ground for a lifetime as the wife of an ambassador or some such role then this was the best there was. You had to be able to remain sure of yourself, keep up conversation with people who bored you, and physically cope with an unending round of new faces, new situations and learning that other girls and some men aren’t always kind – and how to cope with the chilly, ambitious and ruthless real world away from home.5

The Season must have been a testing ground for parents, too. How had their girl turned out? How was the son and heir shaping up? How were they doing, as custodians of the family name, the houses, the land? Had they got rid of the Rubens or the Gainsborough to make ends meet? Could they still manage to put on a good show for their daughter’s coming-out dance? These questions would have been more discreetly murmured, but everyone was interested to see how well their contemporaries had survived the years of agricultural depresssion and the roller-coaster stock markets of the turn of the decade.

For the British upper classes were changing, and the Season was the perfect opportunity to judge who was most affected by these changes. The upper, upper echelons of the aristocracy remained the same: the Devonshires, the Marlboroughs, the Northumberlands and Westminsters – they were not feeling the pinch. But people a few rungs lower down felt it. Within three years of the ending of the First World War, a quarter of the land in the country – some six million acres – had changed ownership. The slaughter of the sons of the nobility during the war; the agricultural depression which preceded it for several decades ; the introduction of death duties – all these had drained capital, not fatally, but perceptibly.

The rich were still rich – extremely rich. In 1938 the top 0.4 per cent of families earned nearly 12 per cent of the income for the entire population: and, inevitably, most of their wealth came from unearned income rather than salary. Or, to put it another way, by 1936 the top 1 per cent of wealth-owners (as distinct from earners) held 56 per cent of the nation’s wealth. The remaining 44 per cent was shared out between the other 99 per cent of the population. But the most relevant fact about extreme wealth is that it is determined very largely by inheritance. Most very rich people were born rich, they married rich, and they died rich. Aristocrats did not make money by their own efforts ; but they guarded and increased what their forefathers had amassed. This was done by careful deployment of one’s assets. Money was surrounded by pallisades of accountants and stockbrokers, trustees and tax experts and financial advisers ; property by farm managers who were expert in administering large estates and stockmen who knew about pedigree herds and trainers who knew about racehorses ; possessions by picture and furniture dealers who valued and advised in the buying and – more rarely, in those days – selling of works of art. Was a man who took such care of his property likely to leave his daughter to the mercies of any glamorous adventurer?

The family was of prime importance, for it preserved the bloodline, to which the upper classes attached an almost mystic significance, and which they believed explained their innate superiority. In its purest sense, it can be seen in the reverence accorded to royal lineage, based on the notion of the divine right of kings. This was perhaps the origin of the belief that the bloodline is an almost sacred inheritance, to be guarded and revered, not tainted by common stock. The blue blood of the nobility was a metaphor that they themselves took very seriously.*

The pursuit of wealth was the pursuit of status, not merely for oneself but for one’s family. In the last resort the ultimate motivation was a dynastic one: to found a family, to endow them splendidly enough to last for ever, and to enjoy a vicarious eternal life in the seed of one’s loins.6

Now that wealth was no longer concentrated in the hands of the landed aristocracy, but distributed around a larger – and widening – class of industrialists, financiers and entrepreneurs, it was all the more important that old wealth should control the appropriate setting within which to assess and perhaps ally itself with the young generation of the newly wealthy.

This change in the location of wealth had happened gradually over the previous hundred years. The Industrial Revolution and the rise of technology and communications created a new class of millionaires: families like the Tennants, whose fortune was based originally on a process for making better starch. At a time when laundresses starched acres of table linen, bed linen, cotton petticoats, servants’ uniforms and so on, a better starch could be the starting point for a business empire, augmented later on by shrewd investment in mining, railways and banking. Thus Charles Tennant – later Sir Charles Tennant, Bart – made not just himself but all his descendants wealthy, and saw his daughters marry into the aristocracy, while his son entered the peerage and was created Baron Glenconner. Such rich and powerful families simply could not be dismissed for being ‘in trade’. If the first generation was in trade, the second was in Society and the third (if not sooner) was in Debrett.

These new rich families were gradually assimilated by the old aristocracy. After the First World War, yet newer families sprang up whose wealth commanded respect. They too wished to enter the Establishment (a word not used in this sense until the 1960s to describe the class that holds power in government and the City, and also controls social conventions of behaviour and modes of thought) ; the Establishment needed them. Where better to size up their manners and suitability than during the rigours of the Season?

The English upper classes determined and monopolized the desirable canons of taste and standards of behaviour and this – class consciousness, in a word, or, more crudely, class snobbery – was the source of their power. No other class ever had the confidence to challenge it, and none created an alternative. If the upper classes pursued a way of life based on country estates and London clubs, on grouse-shooting and hunting during the winter months and dancing and racing during the summer – why then, so would the aspiring upper classes. The new Victorian millionaires moved out of their northern industrial cities, the places which had made them what they were and had made them rich, to settle their families on huge country estates. Their children were schooled in manners and accents that must have been very different from their parents’. They tried to forget, and to persuade others to forget, that they owed all they had to trade.

In the twentieth century this pattern was made easier by the enforced sale of land by the aristocracy and country gentry. The land that the new rich bought was the very same land the old rich had owned. They thus acquired, almost by osmosis, the one thing that money could not buy: ancestry. What they actually bought was merely the appearance (it could not be the reality) of continuity; the illusion of a rooted, continuous bloodline. The hold that the upper classes were able to maintain over people richer (in some cases) and with more energy and newer ideas than themselves was based on tradition and custom, on family trees that could be traced back for generations. The very same attributes in Europe intimidate rich Americans today. For all their money and vigour, they cannot match the history.

The infiltration of this new class was recognized by the honours system, another way of taking on the protective colouring of the aristocracy. Nancy Mitford made the point crisply in Noblesse Oblige:

A lord does not have to be born to his position, and, indeed, can acquire it through political activities, or the sale of such unaristocratic merchandise as beer, but though he may not be a U-speaker* he becomes an aristocrat as soon as he receives his title. The Queen turns him from socialist leader, or middle-class businessman, into a nobleman, and his outlook from now on will be the outlook of an aristocrat.7

The desire of the nouveaux riches to have their achievements validated by a title ensured that they would conform to the patterns of behaviour laid down by those they wished to join. During the twenty years between 1918 and 1938, eighty-one new titles were created, including six earls and viscounts. (This excludes the enormous number of knighthoods with which Lloyd George was thought to have debased the currency.) A majority of peerages went to former mps (ensuring their conformity to the prevailing party line) but industry, finance and commerce accounted for nearly as many. The peerage by now reflected a much wider element in Society than merely its landed interests. As well as helping the new rich to disappear into the ranks of the old after a couple of generations, this form of patronage also made sure that real power stayed concentrated in the hands of a very small number of like-minded people. Thus the grip of the old upper class upon the nation’s wealth was not threatened by the influx of a new upper class whose wealth was separate from, and independent of, theirs. The best way to secure this was for the two classes to intermarry. The old family conferred its status and traditions upon the new – or newish – family, receiving in return enough money to ensure that its privileged position would be upheld for future generations.

This, then, was the purpose of the Season. Since arranged marriages could not be foisted upon young members of the upper class – a century before, perhaps, but not any longer – they needed an environment which offered the high probability that within it they would meet the kind of partners whom their parents would have chosen for them; and an environment which excluded all other kinds. ‘Never marry for money: love where money is’ mothers used to tell their daughters. It is a fine distinction ; but it preserves the illusion of freedom to make a romantic choice. And so the Season did not merely reflect or display the structure of the English upper classes – it actually controlled and renewed it.

For the time being, those pretty, artless social butterflies, the debs of 1939, might flutter from dance floor to cloakroom, from Ascot to country house, sometimes in tears and sometimes in triumph. But the breeze that wafted them – although they are reluctant even now to admit as much – was a gale far more powerful than their youthful desire to have fun.

Where, in this delicately strung social web, did the established (as opposed to the new) middle classes fit in, if at all? Surprisingly, perhaps, there were a few middle-class girls taking part in the Season, and an impression persists that some of them really did have fun. They were in a sense hors de combat. Neither rich nor securely ‘upper crust’, they were usually there because their mothers had been presented and had then married men who took them a notch or two down the social scale. In this way, a daughter of modest background might still have access to rich cousins and their cast-offs. If she were an engaging girl – pretty, unselfconscious, vivacious – her mother’s family might decide it was worth the girl doing a Season, ‘just for the experience, of course’. She would not be expected to make a ‘catch’, yet she did, at one remove, belong. A handful, a dozen of such girls could be found each year: ‘You could do the Season as cheaply or as expensively as you wished. I remember two sisters, poor as church mice, who had enormous fun.’ Or, in the words of an American popular song, ‘Nice people with nice manners, but they’ve got no money at all.’

The Season began ‘officially’ on Friday, 28 April 1939, the day of the Private View of the Royal Academy’s Summer Exhibition. The Times next day carried a long article describing the fashionable women who thronged the galleries, less to see the paintings (it was a mediocre year in any case) than to be seen to be there. Miss Valerie Cole was dressed in ‘powder blue, with a very full net veil trimming her large blue hat’; while Miss Sarah Dash wood wore ‘a raspberry red frock and a white straw hat trimmed with cherries’; and Miss Barbadee Knight was in two shades of brown.

There were other names too in The Times that day, also jostling for attention but less likely to get it. They were in the Personal column – German and Austrian Jews, desperate to find a sponsor who might offer them the chance to escape from Hitler: like the German-Jewish couple, ‘wife good housekeeper, husband perfect motorist, able to do any other work … offers to H.Reckerwell, Hamburg’; or the German Jew aged thirty-six, ‘well educated, best family, asks for opportunity to learn handicrafts … H.Knopf, Berlin’; or, most nakedly of all, ‘Jew, 66, educated, begs for permit. Singer, Vienna’. Under the Domestic Situations Required column there were eleven people wishing to be companions and governesses, six offering themselves as housekeepers and several seeking posts as ladies’ maids, like the German-Jewish girl ‘still in Berlin’. Their chances of being noticed were not nearly as good as the smart Society women’s whose fashions were described in detail, although for the Jews being noticed was a matter of life and death.

The column headed In Memoriam, On Active Service, contained the names of four men who had died less than twenty-five years before. Douglas Amery Parkes, who died of wounds, remembered by his mother. Roy Bullen, of the King’s Royal Rifles, who was killed in France on 29 April 1916. Major Hubert Dunsterville Harvey-Kelly, dso, (‘Baz’), of the Royal Flying Corps. And, finally, Frederick Leycester Barwell, also of the Royal Flying Corps, ‘killed in aerial combat when attacking five or six enemy aeroplanes single-handed’. He had been twenty-two years old. His proud and grieving parents quoted in the memorial notice an extract from the enemy report:

The combat lasted a full half hour ; all the troops in the neighbourhood came out and watched this thrilling fight: the British airman persistently sought combat and half a dozen times appeared to be nose-diving to earth, but each time he flattened out and with admirable daring, attacked again: they were full of admiration for the courage of this pilot.

He was buried by the enemy with full military honours. He was the eldest and dearly loved son of Leycester and Mabel Barwell. The Barwells are not listed in Who’s Who, so it is impossible to discover whether they had a granddaughter: but, if they had, she would have been just about the right age to be presented in 1939.