Molly trudged out to Hannah’s Subaru, her trademark sulk firmly in place. She joined Cole in the backseat without a word.
“So, how was your second day at school?”
“I hate this place and I want to go home. To Texas.”
Was that what she truly wanted? Would she really be happier living with Ethan, after all—or was she simply longing for the days before her parents died?
The children’s happiness was paramount, but there were so many uncertainties in that equation that Hannah didn’t even want to think about it. Not yet.
Molly had fallen asleep last night before Hannah had made it to her bedroom, so there had been no chance for a much-needed discussion. And with the return of Cole’s night terrors, Molly had awakened in the middle of the night, and then tossed and turned.
Lack of sleep hadn’t made the child’s day any better.
Molly picked at a loose thread on her backpack strap. “How is Belle?”
“She’s at the vet clinic right now.”
Molly jerked upright, her eyes wide with alarm. “They wouldn’t—They couldn’t—”
“They’re taking good care of her, I promise. They’re giving her IV fluids and antibiotics, and they’ve started treating the ulcers.”
“I don’t believe you. Maybe they’ll decide to put her to sleep.” Molly’s lower lip trembled. “I want to see her. Can we go there? Right now?”
“That happened with our kitty,” Cole mumbled. “She went to the vet and never came back.”
Oh, dear. Hannah turned her SUV toward the vet clinic. “I’m so sorry to hear that, Cole. Was she very old and sick?”
Cole shook his head. “She couldn’t come to our new ’partment so Dad sent her to heaven.”
Instead of a shelter? Hannah had a feeling there was more to the story, but maybe Dee just hadn’t explained it very well.
“There might have been a very good reason, sweetie. Sometime animals are suffering too much, and it’s more kind to let them go.”
“No,” Cole insisted with a stubborn shake of his head. “She couldn’t come to the ’partment when we moved. It wasn’t fair.”
If he was right, Hannah totally agreed. “Well, just to show you that Belle is receiving good care, we’re going to the clinic. Okay? It’s just a few blocks away.”
Molly and Cole sat silently in the backseat until Hannah pulled into the parking lot, but they both beat her into the clinic.
Hannah followed them inside. “I have a couple of kids here who are worried about Belle—the dog I sent in this morning. Can we see her?”
Marilyn, the sixtysomething receptionist, shook her head. “I’m sorry—”
“No!” Molly screamed. “You killed her?”
“Of course not,” Marilyn said gently. “The vet is doing some surgery on her right now, but she should be fine.”
Molly looked up at Hannah with a stricken expression. “I want to see her,” she begged. “Please. What if she dies? I didn’t even get to say goodbye.”
This wasn’t just about the dog, Molly realized with a pang of sorrow. It was about life and loss and grief that had to weigh on these kids every single day.
The parents they loved had left one day and never returned. How did a child ever recover from that?
“About how long until Belle is finished?”
“Maybe a half hour, but I’m not sure.” Marilyn lowered her voice. “Darcy made sure it was the last appointment of the day, just in case it took longer. Imbedded choke chain. Deep.”
Hannah swallowed hard then summoned a cheery smile. “Okay, kids, it’s going to be a long while, and even then Belle will need to recover from anesthesia. Let’s walk down Main Street.”
“I want to stay.” Molly plopped down on the nearest chair.
“Molly, there’s nothing to do here, and it will be a long wait. Why don’t we check out Keeley’s cookies at her antiques store, then we can stop at the Christmas Shoppe. I’d like you both to pick out some new decorations for our Christmas tree so we can go out and cut our tree tomorrow. By then it will be time to come back and see Belle.”
Feeling as if she were being followed by two reluctant ducklings, Hannah headed down Main Street. The sky was overcast with the feeling of snow in the air and dusk was falling earlier every passing day. All of the storefronts were decorated and brightly lit. Overhead, Christmas lights were twinkling on every lamppost.
At Keeley’s store, the stained-glass lamps and sparkling antique chandeliers inside cast a welcoming glow onto the sidewalk. Hannah ushered the kids into the store. “This is where your pretty stained-glass bedside lamp came from, Molly. Keeley gave it to you as a gift.”
Molly nodded.
From behind the cash register Keeley waved and pointed to the table with a coffeemaker, a pitcher of ice water and an array of decorated Christmas cookies on a crystal platter covered with a glass dome, then continued to wait on a customer.
“I don’t suppose this would be your favorite kind of store, Cole. But would you like to look around or would you rather sit at the ice-cream table by the window and have your cookies?”
Cole zoomed to the window and settled on a wrought-iron chair. He looked up in awe at a vintage lamp with cartoon figures chasing each other around the rim of the shade.
After wandering aimlessly through the store, Molly joined her brother, her gaze fixed on a two-foot Christmas tree adorned with antique decorations in the corner. The sadness in her eyes was palpable.
“I love Christmas,” Hannah said as she brought over the platter and two paper plates.
Cole tentatively picked a Santa cookie and looked up at her.
“Aren’t these pretty? I’m sure it’s okay if you want two.”
Molly halfheartedly picked the cookie closest to her on the platter. Her gaze veered back to the tree. “It’s not like Christmas this year,” she said softly. “Not the same at all.”
Hannah set the platter back on the serving table and brought over two waters and a black coffee. “I don’t suppose it will be. But we will always have Christmas. Every year, we celebrate the birth of the Christ child, just as you did before, and that will never, ever, change. I promise. And every year, we’ll have presents under a tree and Christmas stockings. And I hope we can talk about your Christmas memories—and try to make new ones, too.”
“We had a tree in a box,” Cole announced.
“An artificial tree then. I’ll bet it was nice.”
He nodded. “And we had favorite decorations—ones we made at school. One had my picture on it from preschool.”
Hannah’s eyes started to burn. The shipping boxes from Texas weren’t all emptied yet—just the ones with the children’s clothes, toys and books. The others were stored away in the bedroom upstairs. But she’d looked inside each one and knew for a fact that none of them had contained Christmas ornaments.
Cynthia had probably seen it all as rubbish and discarded it. And in the process, she’d destroyed one more connection the kids could have had with their past.
“After your cookies, we’re going to buy some Christmas ornaments, and those will be yours forever. But do you know what? I’d love it if we could make some, too. Those would be so special—and we could do it every year.”
“Hey, guys.” Keeley sauntered over and pulled up a fourth chair to join them. “I’m so glad you stopped in. How’s everything going?”
Cole shyly ducked his head. Molly traced her finger across her cookie and didn’t look up.
“I am so thrilled to have these two with me,” Hannah said. “I hope I can find lots of fun things for them to do. Any ideas?”
“Let me think. You’ve been on a sleigh ride?”
“But it had wheels,” Cole said, taking another bite of his cookie.
“Then that’s what you should do, now that we have snow. It’s only a few days until the weekend and the sleigh rides start again.” Keeley worried at her lower lip with her teeth, thinking. “The kids at church will be caroling that night, too, as they walk down Main Street. Have you two met any of the kids at church yet?”
Hannah shook her head. “They haven’t. We were snowed in Sunday morning, unfortunately. Mingling with those kids would’ve made this first week at school easier, I think. But maybe we’ll run into some of them at the Advent service on Wednesday.”
Molly eyes widened in alarm. “You aren’t going to, like, make me talk to them. Right?”
“That would be awful, no doubt.” Hannah hid a smile. “But if you see someone from school who looks kinda nice, you might ask a question about school, or about the youth group at church or about what they like to do around here for fun.”
“Sounds like a good plan,” Keeley agreed. “Even adults find it hard to meet people in a new town, and if you don’t try, it can be very lonely.”
“Lots of people have moved here during the last few years,” Hannah added. “Did you know Keeley’s fiancé is from Texas like you are?” At Cole’s sudden attention, she nodded. “And Connor is a real cowboy. Now he trains and shows horses here in Wisconsin, but he grew up on a ranch out West. When the weather is nicer, maybe we can go out to the horse ranch where he works, so you can ride.”
Even Molly perked up at that. “Really?”
“Absolutely. But right now we’d better scoot over to the Christmas Shoppe, so we can get back to the vet clinic before it closes. Thank Keeley for the lovely cookies and we can be on our way.”
Cole and Molly bundled up into their coats and mittens, dutifully murmured their thanks and went out to the sidewalk.
Hannah hesitated at the door and looked back. “Thanks, Keel.”
Keeley joined her at the entryway and they both looked out the front window at the children running their hands over the snow-frosted bench just outside. “So how are things going—really?”
“They’re still grieving, of course. And I knew moving here wouldn’t be easy. But sometimes…” Hannah felt tears start burning in her eyes, but she willed them away. “Sometimes they say or do something that rips my heart in pieces. We were just at the vet clinic, and Molly…”
Hannah swallowed hard, unable to go on for a moment. “Can you imagine the pain of losing your parents and having no chance to say goodbye? How can they ever recover from that?”
Keeley gave Hannah a brief, comforting hug. “You will just keep loving them, Hannah. Make them feel loved, and safe, and honor their memories. Do you remember the funeral for the Jones’ boy a few years ago?”
“I’ll never forget it.”
“I remember his distraught mom asking us how she could ever get through her grief and you said…”
Hannah managed a wobbly smile. “By holding on to the faith that he was already with the Lord in heaven, beyond all suffering, and that she would be with him again.”
“You’ll all get through this in time. I promise. There isn’t another person who could handle the challenges better than you will.”
Impatient now, the kids were both looking through the front window at her, their hands framing their faces as they peered through the breath-frosted glass.
Hannah felt her heart warm and give an extra little thump. “I’ll be praying every single day that you’re right, Keel. Because nothing matters to me more.”
* * *
Hannah had envisioned a long and careful search through the Christmas Shoppe while Molly and Cole searched for their perfect ornaments for the tree.
But it took all of five minutes with Molly finding a springer spaniel ornament that looked vaguely like Belle on a display tree right inside the door, and Cole finding a golden retriever one that looked a lot like Maisie on the same tree.
Evening shoppers were beginning to fill the sidewalks as they stepped out of the store, and holiday music filtered into the chilly, early evening air through loudspeakers on the lampposts.
A light dusting of snow had landed over the town, making Hannah feel as if she were walking in an old-fashioned snow globe.
In just a few minutes they were back at the clinic.
Marilyn greeted them with a smile. “I’m glad you made it back. We’ll be closing in fifteen minutes.”
Molly fidgeted from one foot to the other. “Can we see Belle?”
“Of course you can. Dr. Leighton is gone, but I can take you back there. But you have to promise that you won’t touch anything or get too close to the cages. And, especially, do not poke your fingers into the cages trying to pet the animals. We have four post-ops back there, and dogs that are sweet at home can be quite nervous in a vet clinic.”
When both kids nodded, she led the way to the back of the clinic. A night-light warmed the darkness with a soft glow.
Three dogs were immediately awake and barking when Marilyn turned on the fluorescent lights. “Your Belle is over here, to the left. The last time I looked in on her she was quite subdued, but she’s in poor condition and doesn’t have a lot of energy yet. She also took a little longer than usual to wake up after the anesthesia.”
Belle was crouched at the back of her cage, her ears flattened and tail tucked when Molly approached.
“She looks so miserable,” Molly whispered. “I don’t think she even remembers me.”
“I’m sure she’s scared. Here she is, in another new place with strangers, and on some pain meds that might make her a little woozy. I’m sure she’s never had an IV drip before, or NG tube feedings. But Dr. Leighton thinks she’ll be a lot perkier tomorrow.”
“And then we can take her home?”
Marilyn pursed her lips. “That, I couldn’t say. I’m sure we’ll have a better idea in a day or two. You wouldn’t want her home too soon, only to get weak and sick, would you?”
Molly shook her head vigorously. “I want her to be well.”
Cole pointed to three dogs in the cages along the back wall. “Why are they here? Are they all sick, too?”
“Let’s see. One neuter, one spay. Those two will go home tomorrow. One got away from his owner and was hit by a car, so he had his femur repaired this afternoon.”
“I’d like to be a vet someday,” Molly murmured, looking around the room with awe.
“Good for you. There’s a high percentage of female vets these days.” Marilyn ushered them out of the recovery room and switched off the overhead lights. “Study hard, get good grades and take all the math and science classes you can in high school. It will help a lot when you take the pre-vet classes in college.”
Molly looked up at Marilyn with shining eyes. “I will. There’s nothing in the world I want more.”
* * *
Hannah checked the new text message on her phone and sighed. Until she’d brought the children north, she’d never hesitated to put in extra hours at work. Every day brought new challenges and she loved both the patients and the staff she worked with.
But now, she just wanted to be home when the kids weren’t in school. To that end she’d shortened her clinic hours and asked to be taken off the on-call schedule until after Christmas. But apparently the other PA in town was out sick.
She tapped her phone for Ethan’s number. The call went straight to voice mail, so she waited a minute, tried again and left a brief message. Where was he?
She glanced in the rearview mirror as she shifted her vehicle into Drive. Cole slumped in his seat, his face pale and drawn. “Are you all right?”
He nodded, not meeting her gaze in the rearview mirror.
“I guess this was a pretty big day for you two.” She turned onto Main Street. “Did you have a good time?”
No one answered.
“I hope you don’t mind, but I need to stop by Ethan’s cabin to see if he’s available tomorrow, just in case I get called back to work. Is that okay with you?”
When neither of them answered, she directed another glance up at the mirror.
Molly glowered back at her. “We don’t need a babysitter.”
“Maybe not, but I don’t feel comfortable with you two alone out in the country.”
“Mom let us stay home when she went to the store. Nothing happened then.”
“Maybe not, but it will make me feel a lot better if there’s an adult around.” At the other end of town she braked at the four-way stop sign in front of the coffee shop. “Okay?”
“Isn’t that his car?” Cole piped up. “Right over there.”
Sure enough, it was the SUV with Minnesota plates.
Hannah parked in the next open space, and led the way into the coffee shop. Busy as usual, most of the tables were filled and a number of people were eating at the long lunch counter.
“There he is,” Cole chirped, pointing toward the back. “Talking to that pretty lady standing by his booth.”
Hannah’s heart stumbled.
Dressed in a lipstick-red wool jacket and short skirt, the woman’s clothing molded every perfect curve. Glittering diamonds flashed at her ears and wrists. With the four-inch heels of her tall black leather boots and the thick, wavy blonde hair spilling down her back, she looked like she’d just stepped off the cover of Vogue.
She was obviously a wealthy young woman, and from the silvery trill of her laughter, she and Ethan were enjoying a delightful conversation. No wonder he hadn’t answered Hannah’s calls. He had much better things to do.
Forcing back a flare of unexpected jealousy, Hannah glanced down at her own puffy black jacket—the one that probably added twenty pounds to her silhouette, and the khaki slacks badly stained with formula a baby had spit up on her at the clinic.
But jealousy was a ridiculous response.
Ethan and she had no personal relationship. None—beyond the politely adversarial situation they’d been locked in since he’d appeared at her door. He was free to flirt with anyone he chose, and it didn’t matter to her at all. And if his taste now ran toward women like this one, he probably thought Hannah was pathetic.
“Uh…Ethan looks like he’s busy. Let’s go,” she murmured.
But Cole was already racing to the booth, with Molly on his heels, so there was no turning back.
The blonde looked down at them with horror, then raised her gaze and gave Hannah a sweeping, dismissive glance. “You have a family?” she snapped, turning back to Ethan. Then she spun on her heel and walked out of the coffee shop.
“Boy, she was mad, Uncle Ethan,” Cole exclaimed as he watched her disappear through the front door. “Was she a movie star or something?”
“She just stopped to visit, I guess.”
“Sorry we interrupted,” Hannah said dryly. “I can run after her and tell her that you are totally available, if you’d like.”
“Please don’t.”
“Hannah’s better, anyway,” Molly muttered. “At least she’s nice.”
Faint praise, but even that much was a surprise and Hannah gave her shoulders a quick, one-armed hug. “We saw your car and stopped, because I tried to call a little while ago.”
Ethan gestured at his coffee cup. “Join me?”
“No, I’ve got to get the kids home, but thanks, anyway. I just learned that I need to be on call tomorrow evening. If I do get called in, can you spend some time with the kids?” She flicked a glance at the front door of the coffee shop. “Unless you’ll be seeing your…friend, that is.”
He grinned at Molly and Cole. “Nope. Hands down, I’d rather spend time with you two, any day.”
“Thanks, Ethan.” Hannah waggled an eyebrow up and down. “And just to make sure no one is bored, I have a cool project for the three of you. Just wait and see.”