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Tobey sat down on the couch then jumped back up, aware of the dirt and sweat coating his body and not wanting to ruin it just yet. It was a beige, microfiber sectional that fit perfectly in the upstairs room with the bay window, the glass panels of which had been pushed up to let in the slight autumn breeze.
“Tobey, where are you?” he heard Kelsey’s voice.
“Up here,” he called.
He listened to the clip of her hard-heeled shoes on the wooden floor as she found him. “I do love this couch,” she said. “But this room needs a pop of color. Some greens or blues to really complement that skyline. Oh, some bunting on this long wall, perhaps!”
“Perhaps,” Tobey said.
“I think the downstairs is as done as can be for now,” Kelsey said. “So I just came up to say bye.”
“Thanks for all your help, Kelsey,” Tobey said, turning away from the view to smile at her. “I couldn’t have done it without you.”
“I’m here to help,” she said, smiling back. “But now that you’re making this personal living space, you don’t really need my expertise anymore.”
“Sorry.” Tobey shrugged.
“No, I totally get it. This house has grown on me too, once you stripped out the haunted feeling.” Kelsey cocked her head so that her giant hoop earring rested against her shoulder. “You gonna be okay out here by yourself?”
“I’ve got Cosmo,” Tobey said. “And the ghosts.”
“You’re hilarious,” Kelsey said. “Well, I’m gonna go. Text me whenever, ‘kay?”
“Sure thing,” Tobey said.
Kelsey reached out her arms, and Tobey let her give him an awkward hug. Then she was tripping back downstairs and out the front. Tobey watched her from the window.
He and Cosmo were officially moved in. Emmett and Benny and Kate had helped a little yesterday, but Kelsey had been a much bigger help with the furniture that had just been delivered on the front porch this morning. And since she had helped Tobey pick out so much of it online, she knew where it was all supposed to go. Tobey knew it was dumb to miss Emmett when he had only been gone for a day, but it was knowing that he wouldn’t see him tonight that made it worse. He wasn’t sure when Emmett wanted to see him again. How many days was appropriate before inviting one’s boyfriend over for dinner in one’s new house? Zero days? Please let it be zero days.
“Cosmo? What do you want for dinner?” Tobey yelled. But he wasn’t sure if Cosmo could hear him. This house was so damn big, and Cosmo could be anywhere. Tobey hadn’t seen him in hours.
Tobey went downstairs to the retro-fitted kitchen. Kelsey had insisted that he install a new fridge that looked old-fashioned, and Tobey had to admit it lent a nice touch with the white, ceramic farmhouse sink and gas burner stove. He had purchased a few basic kitchen items like pots and whisks, but there was still a lot to be desired. Food, for instance. The retro fridge was empty except for a six-pack of beer and a stack of Lunchables that he and Cosmo had picked up at the gas station.
He pulled out his phone and tried to think of something witty to text Emmett. Do you think Los Amigos delivers this far out of town? No. Come over for dinner, but you have to bring your own. No. I miss you.
The new doorbell chimed.
Tobey ran to the front door, hoping it was Emmett.
“Oh, hi, Rhonda, what are you doing here?”
“Abby and Jesse were over for Sunday dinner, and they told me everything.” Rhonda leaned over the casserole in her arms and pecked Tobey on the cheek. Then she shoved herself past the threshold. “Oh, wow, this place looks nothing like I was expecting.”
“Not exactly like when your grandparents were out here, huh?”
“No, but that’s fine. I mean, it looks so homey already! I can’t believe how much work you’ve put into it.” She ran a finger over the new dark wood of the banister.
“Thanks.” Tobey eyed the dish hungrily. “Is that...lasagna?”
“Oh, yes, of course! Just point me to the oven and I can get it all set up for you. And I have a tin of Cosmo’s favorite cookies in the car.”
He led her back to the kitchen. “I do know how to bake, Rhonda, but I really appreciate it. I might have forgotten to plan for eating here. I’ve become used to cooking for five recently.”
“Oh, Tobey, honey.” Rhonda set down the casserole on the counter and pulled Tobey into a hug. When she finally pulled away, she looked like she might cry.
“Are you okay?” Tobey asked.
“Me?” Rhonda gave a teary laugh. “Are you okay?”
“Yes...” Tobey said slowly.
“Good, that’s good,” Rhonda said. “I’m so glad you’ve decided to stay even though you and Emmett broke up. I’ve really enjoyed getting to know you and Cosmo.”
“Emmett and I broke up?”
“That’s what Abby said—oh dear, did I misunderstand?”
“I...don’t know.” Had Emmett been trying to break up with him? It would explain why Emmett had been acting distant for the past couple of weeks. And with Tobey gone for most hours of the day, and talking incessantly about the Money Trap, Emmett hadn’t been able to get in a word edgewise. Except for that one snappy conversation about getting Tobey out of his space.
Were they broken up? “Rhonda, please excuse me, I need to make a phone call.”
Whatever Rhonda said next was lost in the screeching static in Tobey’s head as he stumbled from the kitchen back to the laundry room. He recalled how Emmett had pushed him away after Tobey said that he wanted to move out here. Was that the first sign? The first time Emmett had tried to tell him that he was done? Had their seemingly perfect trip to Chicago wrecked them? Saying “I love you” had been too serious and scared him off? Was the ugly blemish of his family too large to ignore? Should he not have sold the garage—did Emmett look down on him for giving up something he had worked so hard for? What had he done wrong?
Emmett picked up after two rings. “Hello, yes, we are eating healthily,” he answered.
“Did you want to break up with me?” Tobey asked.
A shocked silence.
“Well? Did you?”
When Emmett finally spoke, his voice was shaking too. “Did you want to break up with me?”
“I certainly don’t want to be with someone who can’t tell me the truth about how they really feel.”
“I already told you that I’m a big liar. I lie to everybody.”
“Even to me?” Tobey asked.
“Even to myself,” Emmett said quietly. “You know that.”
“So what does that mean?” Tobey said. “Who are you going to stop lying to?” What was he even saying? Was he implying that their relationship was a charade? Or was he referring to Emmett pretending to everybody in town that they weren’t in a relationship at all? Or both?
“I don’t know,” Emmett said. “Tell me what you want from me.”
“Tell me what you want? What kind of non-committal bullshit is that?” Tobey almost threw his phone in frustration. Instead he just hung up.
Of course this whole thing had been too good to be true. Tobey had resisted against his feelings the entire time, barely letting Emmett drag him into a relationship, because relationships never worked for him. And then as soon as he fell in love with a guy, basically gave up everything in Chicago for him, now Emmett was the one being noncommittal? Tobey couldn’t breathe.
“Dad?” Cosmo leaned into the doorframe of the utility room. “There you are! Are you okay?”
“Yes,” Tobey said. He pounded on his chest and cleared his throat. “Just getting a little overwhelmed with everything going on. The house. With the house. Where’s Rhonda?”
“She left. She put something in the oven and said I needed to check on you.”
“I’m fine.” He put an arm around Cosmo’s shoulder. “That was really nice of Rhonda to come by, huh? It smells good already.”
“She gave me some cookies too. She seems to think I like nuts.”
“Well, I like nuts.”
“Is that a gay joke? Ew!”
Tobey tried to laugh, but it caught in his chest.
~
“Dad? Are you okay?”
Emmett slid back into his seat at the table in a black fog. There was something else he had meant to say. He was supposed to tell Tobey that he had told Abby and Jesse the truth and it didn’t matter to him what they thought, that he just wanted Tobey. But then Tobey had started in with that “do you want to break up?” and “what do you think?” and he just sounded so upset, like he had been waiting for the right minute to tell Emmett that he had realized that everything up until this point had been a mistake, and Emmett had frozen and didn’t know the right thing to say. And then Tobey had just hung up, before Emmett could clumsily make an attempt at back pedaling.
Like it would have mattered. Tobey had made his choice weeks ago when he started planning to move out. It seemed Tobey had just been waiting until he was gone for real so they didn’t have to be broken up and still living together. And now it was done.
“Dad?” Benny asked again.
“Huh? Oh, sorry, that was Tobey on the phone.”
“What did he say?”
Emmett cleared his throat. “Nothing you’d want to hear. Just boyfriend stuff.”
“Gross,” Benny said.
“Exactly,” Emmett said. “So. More pizza?”