Chapter 38

REFLECTION

before Shunta and Gō

return to school

there are PTA meetings

and meetings of class parents

and meetings between Mom and Dad

and all the parents of former han six

and as Mom and Dad say

things might not change overnight

but at least people are now talking

and at least some are listening

and at least some are taking action

 

when I visit Takemura-san

to deliver a box of brownies

in thanks for the kite

that he and his daughter sent me

when they heard the news

he says he wants to go out for a walk

I’m not so sure about this

since he shuffles and gets stuck

and doesn’t seem very steady today

but I agree

and slowly

slowly

we go down the path

               and cross the bridge

                              stopping to watch

                                             a fish leaping

                                                      upriver

it’s a warm day for November

and the river, the trees

the air barely move

 

at the tilted pine park

we sit down on a bench

then I run to a vending machine

at the far end of the park

insert two coins and buy us each

               a cool can of oolong tea

Takemura-san shuts his eyes

gulps and sighs

and when he’s done he thanks me

while tremors make his left leg

and the whole bench

               jiggle

he gestures with his arm

to the river, the trees

toward the port and bay

this … he says is a good place …

               peaceful

and it’s true

when you don’t have to

fear someone like Shunta

and his followers

               it is a good, peaceful place

 

when Shunta and Gō

do return to school

under some kind of probation

ordered by family court

I keep my distance

and they keep theirs

Ōshima-sensei watches them closely

a teaching aide watches them closely

everyone watches them closely

still wary of what they might do

 

a counseling group

visits our school

to help resolve the situation

Ōshima-sensei says

there’s a grade six conference

and a smaller special session

with members of former han six

plus Yōhei, Shō, Ken, and kids

who have been my friends

               even Satomi

we talk about incidents

and what happened

and we’re supposed to share

how we feel now

and how we felt then

 

but no one in class

wants to say too much

no one wants to rat

on anyone else

no one yet trusts

they won’t be a target

in the future

if they say too much

the counselors ask us

to write down our ideas

but it’s hard for me

to write these thoughts

especially in Japanese

and especially

when the problems

seem so obvious

 

I just want to move on

have nothing to do with

Shunta

Naho

Yuki

and Mika

but the counselor

asks me please

to write

and I remember some words

of my aikido sensei

               about a calm mind

               being reflected in others

and so I write

and then I share

what I wrote

 

which is basically

that I want it to be okay to be different

that I don’t want any hitting allowed

that words from teachers are enough

               they don’t need to hit students

that I don’t want kids to just watch

               when something’s wrong

that I want our school to teach respect

that I think everyone, and I mean

everyone

                              should learn

                                                      aikido